A Year of Derpy

by Sleepy Panda

February

It was Hearts and Hooves Day, and that was when I learned of Derpy's coltfriend.

It broke my heart. Not because she wasn't single, of course. That would be selfish of me. No, it broke my heart because of who the stallion was. I'd seen him around town. He was simply awful. He was rude, disrespectful, loud, and inappropriate. He didn't deserve a mare as perfect as that.

They were sitting together on the bench, wings around one another. To any passing onlooker, they appeared to be the perfect couple.

But I had taken a special interest in the mare, so I knew the truth.

"Thunder, you know I'm not a strong flier. I can't make the trip," I heard Derpy say.

"Not a strong flier? Please. You competed in the Equestria games, for Celestia's sake," the stallion snorted.

"That's completely different," Derpy tried to say, but Thunderlane cut her off.

"No, it really isn't. You know what I think? I think that you just don't want to meet my parents," he accused her.

"Excuse me?" Derpy demanded, offended.

The argument would have been amusing to watch if not for the mare involved in the argument. Somehow, despite the fact that they were throwing angry remarks at each other that must've stung like a whip, they retained the appearance of the perfect couple.

I wanted so badly to walk up to the pair and rid her of the stallion forever. They obviously weren't happy together, and Thunderlane was simply awful. I often heard him making crude jokes about Derpy with his friends. He objectified her. It was as clear as day.

But I was only a stranger, and a shy one at that. I barely talked to ponies, and when I did, it was just small talk. Confronting an obnoxious stallion and stealing his partner was completely out of the question.

So, like the coward I was, I continued watching, though is was painful to do so.

"Look, I said I was sorry. Stop crying, honey," he told her. She shook her head and looked up at the clouds, probably wishing to be anywhere but there. "Please, look at me. Talk to me." Derpy shook her head again, and his face contorted in rage. "Look at me!" he shouted, roughly grabbing her head and forcing her to look his way. The birds went silent, and they all stared. Nopony came to help Derpy, though, as nopony else was in the park but me. There rarely was. Occasionally, in warmer weather, somepony might jog through the park, but it was extremely rare for anypony to come by in the wintertime.

"Please stop," Derpy whispered. "Just stop. Please..." and then she broke down and rested her head on Thunderlane's shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably. The gray stallion's expression softened, and he stroked her head.

"There there, it's okay," he murmured. "I'm really sorry. It won't happen again, I promise. It's just... work has been stressful lately, and I snapped at you."

All lies and excuses, of course. I'd seen him at work. He does absolutely nothing but joke loudly with his friends. Stressful? Ha! Getting a massage was more stressful than his toughest work day.

"And hey, if you really don't want to go, then we can always schedule the visit for another time when we can take the train up," he offered.

"N-no, this is obviously important to you," Derpy sniffled. "I can fly."

"That's not fair to you, though. How about this: we break the trip into four parts, regularly stopping to rest in different cities? We can split it up into a two-day trip rather than just one day. Does that sound like a good compromise?" Thunderlane asked.

"Yeah. I like that." A smile formed on Derpy's face, and I felt sick to the stomach. Thunderlane was acting sweet and sappy just to win her back. I'd seen this behavior before with Cloudchaser. Yes, that's right - Derpy wasn't the only mare he was with, and somehow I doubt that Derpy knew this.

"Not a very good start to a Valentine's day, is it? Thunderlane laughed sheepishly, earning a giggle from Derpy. "Here, I got you something." Derpy sat up, curious as to what her gift was. Thunderlane smiled and presented two tickets to her. "Two all-day passes to the Cloudsdale Muffin Factory. The best part is, you get unlimited free muffins at the end of the tour."

Derpy gasped and hugged Thunderlane tightly. "Thank you! I love it!" she squealed. "I got you something too, but I lost it," she admitted, frowning a bit. "I'll cook you dinner tonight to make up for it, though." Thunderlane kissed her on the cheek.

"That would be wonderful," he said. "We should head home. My hooves are going to freeze off if I stay outside any longer."

"Yeah, mine too," Derpy joked. I watched sadly as the pair stood up and left.

Thunderlane was so incredibly fake. I'd never seen him act even remotely like that towards anypony, with the exception of his other current girlfriend. What does he get out of this? He certainly doesn't love Derpy. If he did, he would never make such crude jokes about her to his friends. The only possible benefit I could see him getting out of this relationship was money. It was common knowledge that Derpy's parents were wealthy ponies.

If not that, then Thunderlane was a changeling. But that's absolutely ridiculous. No doubt about it, Thunderlane was only interested in the money.

Comments

[Phaedra]

A sweet story, to be sure. I'll keep track of it.

Although, one thing does need to be said.

Getting a massage was more stressful than his toughest work day,

I'm containing my inner grammar Nazi.

iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/379997__safe_twilight%2Bsparkle_animated_meme_image%2Bmacro_twiface_wrong%2Bneighborhood_vibrating_descriptive%2Bnoise_x%2Bintensifies.gif

[Sleepy Panda]

6114601 Fixed. At least, I think I fixed it.

[GrizzlytheMedic]

I love this story! Glad to see you back Sleepy!

[Sleepy Panda]

6114618 Thanks.

[UniqueSKD]

6114626 God damn it, Sleepy Panda!

When you commented on one of my stories before, why didn't you tell me you could write good stuff like this!?!

I feel like I missed out on something huge here! Next time, you inform me directly when you write a new fanfic, you got that? I don't want to miss out on any more good fanfics from you, sir/madam!

You may resume your normal duties, soldier! Dismissed!

[Sleepy Panda]

6114980 Thank you. Your comment made my day.

I shall do that.

[UniqueSKD]

6114986 Thank you. Your response made my night. :)

Now go do that. XD

[Sleepy Panda]

6115135 'Everyone' is acceptable too. Unless I accidentally said 'everybody'?

[PegaSeraph]

love it!!!
moar please

[Outa-here]

Just finished reading this second chapter, can't wait to read more! Great stuff! Keep up the good work! (Derpy's always been my favorite pony, anyway. Derpy is Best Pony!)

[inum76]

A cute story with Derpy. Worth a look, seeing that she is my favorite background pony.

6114601
Grammar Nazis are needed in great abundance on the site. My stories alone show proof of that.

[Phaedra]

6117917 So true.

[The Wandering Bard]

Oh geez, my heart. What you do well here is make the characters believable in such a short amount of time. They're easily relatable, so I'm quick to care for them or to want to strangle Thunderlane. And the silent protagonist? Well, you've done a great job getting into their thoughts as well.

I also love the way you set your scenes. Keep on writing! You're doing a fantastic job!

[Old Diggy]

I'm really getting some stalker vibes from this MC, though that may just be me.

[Violet Rose in The Rain]

6115176 A nice display of the Unreliable Narrator trope. Well done.

[Meta Four]

7604826
I was thinking the same thing. Especially this bit:

All lies and excuses, of course. I'd seen him at work. He does absolutely nothing but joke loudly with his friends. Stressful? Ha! Getting a massage was more stressful than his toughest work day.

Sure, you just happen to know so much about these ponies' personal lives, Mr. Narrator. Suuuuuure...