Cloudy with a zero percent chance of immortality
Rain and wind crashed down from the heavens, whirling around the Northern Wastelands as we see a particular anti-hero, with a particular device, flying over the area.
Bleep... Bleep...
"Come on.. Come on!” Vegeta yelled at the device in his hands, shaking it angrily as thunder cackled in the distance. He landed in the middle of a small canyon, completely oblivious to the lighting that striked nearby as the storm raged on.“If this blasted thing is right, the last one should be right around... Here!" he then shouted as the device’s beeping grew rapid, whipping around and pushing himself over a small rock formation. But to his disappointment, he stared into a small, empty chasm of nothing but rocks and maybe a dead body but he couldn’t tell.
"Goddammit!" Vegeta screamed out bitterly as he climbed back up empty-handed, stomping a foot as more thunder roared with the lightning that streaked across the blackened sky. "This fucking thing has been in many situations, and now it can't even take on a simple rain storm?! What the flying-fuck! I blame Krillin!"
Miles upon miles away, Krillin sensed a disturbance as he sat with his friends on their small island.
“What.”
Vegeta continued to fume, gritting his teeth as he angrily smashed the radars screen in frustration.
Bleep... Bleeeeeeeeep!
"Aha!" Vegeta exclaimed as he speedily moved to the radar’s newly pointed location. But once more, he saw nothing.
"I swear to fucking God, I will level this entire fucking place if this thing is wrong agai-" Vegeta stopped mid sentence as something orange glimmered in the distance, his eyes fixing upon the familiar, star-covered sphere inside a small cavern.
“Finally!” Vegeta said victourusly, pumping a fist into the air. “After all this time, I finally managed to collect the 7 dragon balls!” Vegeta then let out a generic evil laugh, with a generic insane smirk plastered on his generic face.
“No more Mr. Goody two-shoes for these assholes. After I finally gain immortality, I will grind them all into dust, and I will rule this planet as MY BITCH! That's right, motherfuckers! All shall tremble under my fist of fury! And why stop there? After I take over the earth, the whole universe is within the palms of my hands! I, Vegeta, shall be known as the king of the universe! MHUAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!11!!1 *Insert Evil Laughter* ”
"Oh yeah, because a guy named after some eatible plants sounds sooo ruthless and scary."
"Shut it the fuck up, Ghost Nappa!" Vegeta idignatly called out to no one in particular.
“Prison bitch, Vegeta.”
"Goddammit Nappa..."
Making sure that nobody saw him, Vegeta quickly retrieved the final Dragon Ball, tossing it inside an old bag with the rest not mentioned until now because reasons. He then took off to the last place anyone would look, or could disturb him.
Yunzabit Heights
A few hour long (and skippable) flight later, Vegeta landed on one of the many plateaus in the area.
“Alright this is it...” he muttered to himself, sliding the bag off his shoulder with a small thud.
Grabbing the dragon balls, he quickly placed them together on the ground.
“Man, oh man... Would you look at those big, orange, round, delicious balls...”
“Gay.”
“DAMMIT NAPPA!”
The balls began to give a bright yellow, pulsating glow, the sky darkening to a sickly black as masses of dark clouds formed above the area. Vegeta gave a ‘fuck yes’ of victory, moving his hands down to begin the summoning ritual.
“Eternal dragon, I summon you.. SHENRON!”
The Dragon Ball’s energy beam exploded outwards, filling the area with a blinding light. A golden pillar of light suddenly shot out of the balls, twisting and warping, out of the light, the eternal dragon, Shenron, appeared.
”I am Shenron! For activating the Dragon Balls, I shall grand you one wi-... Oh god fucking why, it’s you again...” Shenron said with a annoyed voice, sighing. ”Why does no one else ever finds these damn balls!?”
“...”
“Did Namek get blown up again?”
“No…”
”Earth needs to be repopulated again?”
“No.”
“Has Goku died again?! Because you know I can’t re-”
“WOULD YOU JUST SHUT UP FOR ONE GODDAMN SECOND SO I CAN TELL MY GODDAMN WISH!?!”
“...”
“THANK YOU!” Taking a deep breath, Vegeta came back to reality once again.
“I wish for goddamn immo-”
“Heya Vegeta!”
“GAH! WHAT THE FUCK?!” Vegeta jolted away from the sudden touch on his shoulder. Whipping around, he saw the last person he’d ever want to see.
“KAKAROT!?”
“What the hell is he doing here?!”
“What the actual fuck are you doing here, Kakarot?!” Vegeta shrieked. “Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping... Or... you know... Not taking care of your son?”
“Well, I was doing that. But suddenly I came up with an idea which I needed the Dragon Balls for! And I thought, ‘Hey! my best friend Vegeta surely wants to help me find them!’”
“I’m not your friend,” Vegeta said trough gritted teeth.
“So I transmitted myself to you to ask for your help and- Hey wait a minute...” Goku looked up, finding himself staring right to Shenron eyes.
“You found the Dragon Balls! Good job buddy!”
“...Goddammit...”
“Hey you two. Make that damn wish so I can get the hell out of here!” Shenron hissed at the duo. Goku turned around and looked up at him, smiling while Vegeta face-palmed behind him.
“Okay Mr. Dragon! I want to go to a world with sunshine, and rainbows and... TALKING PONIES, YEAH!” Goku shouted happily. “And I want Vegeta to go there too!”
“Wait, what?”
“Wait... what?”
“Your wish has been granted. Now... Get the hell out of here!” ”
“Noo…” Vegeta said as his body began to glow.
“No. No. Noo!” Vegeta watched in horror, as the glow began to swallow up his body.
“Kakarot, You stupid mother fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!”
“Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
And with a final flash, the duo disappeared, following Goku’s wish into the unknown.
.
.
“Maybe I should have told them since this world is in another dimension, the only way to return is to be wished back.”
.
.
“Oh well.. Not my problem anymore!” And with that Shenron disappeared, shooting the Dragon Balls across the world once more..
Celestia’s sun hung high above the Apple family’s orchard, small beams of sunlight breaking through the tree branches and shining on the luscious rows of apples. It made them almost seem “magical”. Near the border of the west orchard, we see a familiar earth pony, kicking trees, to buck the ripe apples for the local market.
Twack!
“Come on...”
Twack!
“Almost there...”
Twack!
“Aaaannd... done!” Applejack said with a satisfied grin the last of the apples found their place inside their baskets. “Hoo-wee!” she huffed, lifting up her stetson to wipe a few strains of sweat off her forehead.
Taking a well deserved break, Applejack took a glance at the wagon, which was stocked to the brim with baskets full of “Equestria’s Finest.”
Satisfied with her work of the day, she trotted over to a nearby tree, laying her head against the trunk. She then closed her eyes for a quick nap, only for them to be filled with an enormously bright, white ray of light.
“W-What in tarnation?” Applejack mumbled sleepily as she opened one eye.
“Applebloom better not be playing with those fireworks again, or.. oh boy is she gonna get it!” Applejack thought to herself.
Covering her eyes with one of her hooves, AJ was unaware of the two objects, or rather, persons, rapidly approaching the orchard.
“uuuuuuuuccckkeeeeerrrr - AH FUCK!”
CRASH!
End of Chapter
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.....lol teh fuck
...So it's the Abridged versions...
I get hard thinkin about this story
5796616 Indeed it is.
5796617 And why is that?
And with this the end of equestria is close XD
5796623 ....you tell me
assets.diylol.com/hfs/834/b9a/dfb/resized/i-am-amused-continue-meme-generator-i-am-amused-continue-19ada8.jpg?1349485336.jpg
5796913 I shall. Altough updates on a regular basis shall be difficult.
Not bad of a story mate, it's a nice change of pace from reading romance ones. Anyways I really don't care for misspelling as long the author stays true to the character(s) and how the readers feels inside the story to. I don't know if you have free time on your hands but another chapter we'll make mine or someone else's day.
5796946 I'm trying to get a good sketch for the next chapter later today.
But having no stable agenda, and having occasional mood swings, make it impossible for me to update on a reqular basis.
this is the funniest thing i've read all morning.
i hope to see more of this or i will cut you.
Oh hell yes..
I vote to co author with you.
Also, maybe put in the description you'll be referencing Abridged so less people get pissy.
That fast?
5797173 Twas what I could write out at the moment. More chapters will follow ofcourse.
5797176 um...more words it.
P.S: Fix you Grammar it.
5797180 Don't worry, it'll be edited. <3
5797193 I see. good luck. i will check you story some progress. when you done.
5797198 Edited
TFS versions? Oh, fuck the hells YES!
I think that one was meant to be Kakarot, because that's all TFS Vegie EVER calls him.
5797345 Ah yes ofcourse. thank you for pointing that out.
btw In Dragon ball EP, no one ever say "Fuck"
5797372 This is based of the Abridges series from TeamFourStar
5797329 Oh my god. Dan!? FAV!!!
*claps hooves together*
This is going to be so fun. I wonder what antics Goku and Vegeta will get into while in Equestria.
I wonder if they're going to try to eat somepony....Saiyans gotta eat ya know.
5797403 Find out on the next chapter of:
Goku and Vegeta Take on Equestria! (or not.. Because you know, filler)
5797350 For the sake of amusement, why not throw in a couple of lines from HUA as well? I'm thinking either, "You missed. Whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop,", "Bitch, I eat people!", or "Bitches love cannons."
5797425 There is still plenty of room for additional lines on future chapters.
5797432 That's what I meant.
5797473 Oh.. Whelp, blaming lack of sleep on that one.
5797476 ...Yeah, you don't get to use that right now, unless you're also an Aussie.
I do.
It's 2 am here.
5797482
6 P.M here. And beeing up since 1 P.M yesterday.
5797496 Been there, done that. Makes me glad I've done with all forms of study for now.
I'll be looking into getting a security license after I turn 21.
I must see this continue. I MUST!!! O_________O
Ha.
I love the idea of throwing the abridged characters into Equestria, but this needs some serious help with editing because it is kind of a mess as is. I will definitely follow it for now because the idea is hilarious, but the problems are really keeping the story as a whole from being good which is very unfortunate because this could be absolutely brilliant.
I likes me some abridged crossover!
, 
nudge, nudge...
Y'know, I wouldn't stop you from doing a Hellsing Abridged crossover as well, hint, hint,
5798491 You know, no offense, saying there are problems then not pointing them out doesn't do squat to help the story. Mind pointing them out so they can be fixed? (BTW I know this chapter was kind of messy, so I plan to help the author a bit more with the next one :3)
5798835 Yeah, I know. The problem is that there were tons of problems of all kinds throughout the entire chapter and I really do not have the time and motivation to edit this myself which is what I would have to do to make sure I didn't miss anything. It has issues with everything from spelling and punctuation to sentence structure to pacing along with a bunch of other weird issues that I am not sure how to even describe which is why the only thing I can really say is that it needs a lot of editing. I am sure there are good editors out there that would be willing to help with this because DBZ Abridged is hilarious and very popular so a crossover with that should have strong appeal, but I do not know how to find them so I cannot help with that either.
5798865 Pacing I can see, but these stories just kinda roll like that. There were maybe one or two sentences that read a little funny. There were perhaps a few small errors with the spelling and punctuation that slipped by me because Gdocs was acting all funny. But besides that all the others things aren't exactly true. 'Weird things you can't even describe'? What the heck does that mean? Also, no offense, but your comment itself had quite a few issues I could point out, so I don't know if I can exactly trust what you say
But, I will take your advice and help the author get some top-notch editors for this.
Interesting theme you got here. I will reserve judgement on this story until you get a few chapters in.
Only real grievance I have are with your tendency to... well, make *sound effects*. *these* comic sound effects works in comics because the description lies in the picture and not in the actual text. It's simply not proper to use them in a novel kind of story, no matter its comical effect. It only translates as one being too lazy to take the time to write properly.
Don't write *Twack* instead describe the action as Applejack kicks the tree with a solid hoof.
And then kicked it again.
Then firmly she planted one last hoof into the bark and watched as the last apple fell from the branch above into the waiting basket at the foot of the tree.
In my opinion it sounds much better and sweeps the reader into the world you are trying to depict, don't you think so?
Well I have said my words, do with them as you like but I hope you take them to heart. See you next chapter.
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5798904 Thank you for pointing this out, and I highly agree with you on this.
I will cherish this info for the future.
I need a adult?
5801801
MOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Think you might want to get a better editor, I count at least ten errors.
random, very random but in the good way, it is really funny, I hope to see more of this.
keep up the good work.
Yes, more, more, MORE!