Mail Order Changeling

by odeeyou

prologue

In the center of the Everfree Forrest, there gathered some 53.5 Changelings two months in the aftermath of the failed invasion of the Equestrian capitol Canterlot.

Fact is, after the love powered shield that threw them from the city, they’d been scattered to the four winds. The shield’s caster acting as an epicenter and all changelings pushed away from it in all directions.

This was a problem.

With the hive scattered about the country, it had taken two months to gather what small number they had. Queen Mother Chrysalis would have been able to contact any changeling over any distance of the continent…

That is, had they been able to find her. Since the invasion, her whereabouts have remained unknown.

They were a nation without a queen. An army without a general. A body without a head.

*The collective is broken.*

*With no queen we cannot properly function.*

*We will die here.*

*Game over man!*

*Something must be done!*

*The hive has lost queens before. A new queen must be found.*

*The next closest hive is across the ocean!*

*We will not survive.*

“ENOUGH!” A changeling broke the mental connection and stepped forward into the center of the mass. “The survival of the hive is paramount. Until Chrysalis or another queen is found we must make decisions for ourselves.”

The assembled changelings blinked collectively. This was something of a foreign concept for many of them.

“I am the oldest and most experienced infiltrator here. I… will take charge.”

The silence over the changelings was deafening for a moment.

*Can we do that?*

*The hive comes first. The hive always comes first. To survive we need sustenance.*

*How? Ponies will be wary.*

*They will hunt us down-*

*Kill us.*

“No, they will not.” The new de facto leader of the changelings spoke. “I have lived a long time hiding amongst the ponies. Since the failed invasion I have continued to monitor the situation. The ponies have passed no laws against changelings and none have been reported as being captured.”

*To survive we need food. Food created most readily available by the ponies.*

*How will we get the ponies to accept us?*

The lead changeling looked hesitant, but spoke words that were likely the first ever spoken by a changeling. “By befriending them.” His wings buzzed agitatedly but his face showed only determination. “And I suggest you start talking like a pony. We will be doing it a lot.”

“So what exactly is the plan?”

This time the changeling was unable to hide his embarrassment, judging by the way his fangs retracted. He mumbled something under his breath.

“What?”

“Iptnadinthpapr.”

“You… you put an ad in the newspaper?!”

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Meanwhile, in a certain Tree Library…

“Pfffsplfft!” Twilight spit her tea all over the paper, in particular the classifieds.

“Oh come one!” Spike looked at the now dripping newspaper. “I hadn’t even gotten to read the funny pages yet!”

Author's Note:

For any errors in spelling or grammar I apologize. I don't have a beta. Mainly cause I work long hours and swing shift. I find time in my off hours to read on my phone but not a lot of time to type on the computer.

Comments

[Zilverfoss]

He put an ad in a newspaper... before discussing the idea with the others? xD
Btw will the 0.5 changeling recive further notice later?

[kooarbiter]

please don't screw this up

I really like the premise

[wlam]

Twilight Prime nodded

"Twilight Prime Celestia Equinified Uncomposed Indepconsciousness Unicorn Neuroform of the Friendship-Rainbow Manorial Schola." Do it properly next time.

[Lunae Lumen]

The shield’s caster acting as an epicenter

The center, or focus, of an earthquake is the spot under the surface where the built-up tension of shifting continents is finally released. The epicenter of an earthquake is the spot on the surface above the center.

That's what epicenter really means - a point above the center.

Shining Armor is at the center of his shield spell, not the epicenter.

[Razzy]

Maybe the 0.5 changeling is s nymph?

Cya
Raziel-chan

[Draco Dei]

6673429
My very tentative hypothesis upon reading that was that they had had a VERY bad landing, gotten bisected a few inches hind-ward of the ribs, but managed to shapeshift enough to keep from dying of blood-loss by shrinking the tissues around the major blood vessels at the point of the damage.

On balance that is probably too morbid for the mood I'm reading here... but only probably.