Ready...
Lovey Dovey smiled the same smile she had been holding for the past ten minutes, and shifted slightly on her favorite beanbag chair. She kept her focus on her client, a nervous blue mare by the name of Blue Bows. The mare glanced around the private office in Lovey's home, her ears slowly pinning back against her mane, until she bolted upright.
"I—I'm sorry, but I can't go through with this! I've changed my mind." Blue Bows turned and galloped for the door. "I'm sorry for wasting your time!"
Lovey pursed her lips. She rose from the beanbag and walked over to the window, watching as Blue Bows fled across the street. Her vision filled with a flash of pink lines when Blue Bows bumped into a stallion, seemed to apologize, then kept running.
The moment Lovey saw the two break eye contact, she felt it in her chest: two thumps followed by a hard, resounding tha-THUMP!
Lovey knew this feeling all too well. It was a heart attack—the kind that alerted her that delicate force she knew as love had been knocked out of balance. Somepony needed to do something, and as Equestria's best matchmaker, she was definitely that somepony!
Her hooves moved faster than her thoughts as she zoomed out of the office and toward the front door. Sitting at the coffee table was her best friend and even better secretary, Juniper, who didn't even look up as Lovey blurred past.
"Good morning, Lovey." Juniper smiled and waved one hoof. "Good luck, Lovey."
"Thanks!" Lovey managed to chirp over her shoulder just as she flew outside.
Her heart pounded hard against her ribs. When she spotted the two ponies again—now further apart from each other, the pink line connecting them taut and ready to snap—she flapped harder to catch up with Blue Bows.
"Hey, you! Stop!" Though Lovey attempted to slow down by spreading her wings out to the sides, her body continued to propel forward much too fast. "Eep! Stop, me! Stop, st—" She collided into Blue Bows with an unfortunate thwump, and they both tumbled to the grass.
"What the—?!" Blue Bows squeaked under the sudden weight. "Lovey! I—I said I'm sorry!"
Lovey jumped up and grabbed Blue Bows by the tail with one hoof. Fueled by a fire to fix what went wrong, she dragged the startled mare back toward the oblivious stallion. "Your turn to stop! Hey, Mr. Blue-Yellow Stallion!"
That seemed to be enough to catch the attention of the stallion in question. When he looked over his shoulder, his eyes widened at the sight of Lovey's rapid approach. "Huh?"
"You nearly lost something!" Lovey exclaimed, letting go of the tail she held and side-stepping to reveal the somewhat irate and very confused Blue Bows. "Here you are."
With that, Lovey started to return home, a hum in her throat and a skip in her step. Warmth radiated from the pair she left behind, tickling the back of her neck like a gentle nuzzle.
"I'm sorry, who are you?" she heard the stallion ask.
There was a brief pause before Blue Bows replied, "Oh, um, well, I'm..."
She didn't need to hear any more than that. All was well with the world again.
"Success?" Juniper asked when Lovey walked back into the living room.
Lovey giggled. "Well, of course! That makes my one thousandth nine-hundred and ninety-ninth match, you know. Who's next on the waiting list? I'm eager to hit two thousand!"
Juniper lifted a notebook and flipped through a few pages. "Let me see. We have two ponies in Appleoosa that I think are actually talking about each other but oblivious to the others' feelings. There's a mare in Manehattan that claims her brother is in desperate need of a match. I also have—"
"Oooh, that one sounds like fun!" Lovey flapped her wings to raise off the ground. "Did she say anything about him?"
"Mm." Juniper's gaze scanned the page. "He's tall, dark, and handsome..."
"Aren't they all?" Lovey giggled. She could picture it: a super handsome stallion with too many mares throwing themselves at him, unable to decide which one is the right one. Been there, done that!
"... he's rich and well-established..."
Yup, this was going to be a breeze. All she had to do was round up all of his suitors and figure out which one was his true love. Maybe a two-day matchmaking session, tops.
"... and he has refused every mare that has asked him on a date."
Lovey froze and floated down to the ground, no longer flapping to keep herself aloft. "What? Every mare?" She whirled around to face Juniper. "Why?"
Juniper's ears fell back and she tentatively explained, "Well, apparently, according to the sister, he—he doesn't believe in love."
Lovey stared, mouth agape, eyes wide. Horror froze her blood right in her veins. How could somepony not believe in love? What happened to all the suitors she envisioned?
Finally, after blinking a few times, Lovey exclaimed, "Cancel all of my other appointments! I must go to Manehattan immediately!"
♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥
"Oh, Miss Dovey, you—"
"Lovey is fine, please." Lovey smiled as she raised the teacup to her lips, sipped, and hummed with delight. "And this tea is absolutely divine!"
Silk Stocking returned the smile with a weaker one. "Thank you, Miss Lovey." She fidgeted nervously, twiddling her hooves and glancing down at her lap. "As I was saying, you absolutely must help my brother. If not for his own sake, then for our family's."
Lovey's smile faded. "What do you mean?"
Silk Stocking flinched. "You may not know of us, because you're not from here, Miss Lovey. We are a well-known family in this city. A long line of business tycoons, you see. But if Magnate does not wed, the family line ends with us." A hoof unconsciously raised to rest on her stomach, a sad look flashing across her face.
Lovey looked around the room, tapping her hoof against her chin. Detailed paintings lined the walls of various ponies, their attire suggesting eras long gone by. "So you're old blood?"
"Yes, Miss Lovey."
With her smile renewed, Lovey puffed out her chest and gave a quick flick of her mane. "Well, you can count on me to find Magnate's true love!"
"Oh, Miss Lovey." Silk Stocking shook her head. Tears were in the very corners of her eyes, like Lovey had said something sad—which she was fairly certain she hadn't. "I'm not asking you to find his true love. There's no hope for him in that regard. I just need you to find somepony that can love him and continue our family."
"What?" Lovey gasped. The teacup fell from her hooves and shattered on the ground while she hopped up into the air, her wings flapping and her eyes narrowed. Papers and other nearby light objects flew from their resting places at the sudden movement of air. "I, Lovey Dovey, promise you that I will find his true love! There is somepony out there for everypony, and on my life as a matchmaker, I know I will find his!"
Silk Stocking's horn lit up and she gathered the pieces of broken china. She said nothing, but kept her gaze downcast, lips tightly pursed, and eyes half closed.
Lovey, returning to her senses, winced. "I'm so—"
"It's quite all right, Miss Lovey." Silk Stocking offered a weak attempt at a smile. "I appreciate your enthusiasm. I only hope you can maintain it despite my brother's... shortcomings."
Lovey waved a dismissive hoof. She landed back on the sofa and crossed her legs. "Nonsense! Once I meet him, I will feel the love line of fate tugging at his heart. I just have to find the other end." Her eyes glittered. She could already imagine how happy Silk Stocking would finally be! "Won't it be wonderful?"
Silk Stocking inclined her head to look at one of the paintings on the wall. She sighed as well, though hers was much more forlorn. "It would be indeed, Miss Lovey."
Lovey giggled. "Don't worry your pretty little head, madam. I'm on the job!" She got off the couch and trotted over to the doors. "Mister Magnate will fall head over hooves for the mare or stallion I find for him!"
"I—I would prefer a mare for him," Silk Stocking stammered, surprise constricting her voice into a high pitch. "A stallion would defeat the purpose of my request."
Lovey froze. "What?" She whirled around on her hindhooves. "I'm terribly sorry, Silk Stocking, but love does not follow purpose or request! I can't guarantee that he's destined to be with a mare, and I won't force him away from his true love." She frowned and punctuated her point with a stomp of one hoof. "It would violate my ethics as a matchmaker."
Silk Stocking's cheeks turned bright red. After a very careful, thoughtful moment, she said in a soft and cautious voice, "I suppose, if you find out that he would be happy with a stallion, then I won't force the issue further."
"Then we're agreed!" She twirled back to the doors, threw them open, and trotted out. "Toodles!"
♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥
It seemed strange to her that Magnate, despite coming from a wealthy family with a big manor, lived in a tiny apartment. Lovey swirled the bubblegum lollipop to the other side of her mouth and shifted her stance against a lamppost, waiting for the stallion. Even stranger to her was that he was late to work. The sun was already well over the horizon!
She waited a while longer before gasping and slapping a hoof to her forehead. "Silly me!" She broke into a gallop. "He's already at work!" Her wings snapped out to the sides and with one big leap and equally big flap, she took off into the air.
Silk Stocking had told her that he worked in an office on the fourteenth floor of Eminence Tower, which was the tallest building in all of Manehattan. When she reached it, she slowed her wings' pace and paused periodically to peer into each office window of the specified floor.
Finally, she spotted a pony that seemed to match Magnate's description. She perched on the ledge just above the window and leaned down to get a better look. His brown coat, dirty blond mane and tail, briefcase cutie mark, and office location matched the information she had tucked away in her mind.
Tall... Check.
Dark... She'd seen darker stallions, but she'd also seen lighter ones, too. Check?
Handsome... She squinted. His back was to her, but it seemed like a nice enough back. Check.
Yup, this had to be Magnate!
Lovey shifted some to try to get into a more comfortable position on the ledge that was barely a hoof's width. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, then opened her eyes again as she exhaled. Her heart fluttered at first, then broke out into heavy pounding all the way to her ears.
It was unlike anything she'd ever felt. The more she thought about him and focused on his love line, the harder her heart thumped against her chest. His soulmate must be very close! She squealed with excitement and lost her balance, toppling head over hooves off the ledge. She fell freely for a moment before her wings spread out to catch her, slowing her fall to a downward spiral to the sidewalk below.
The feeling had been so strong, in fact, she was certain that, if his sister had just waited a few more days, he would have met his special somepony on his own. Happily, she trotted down the sidewalk, trying to follow the beat of her heart, but it suddenly calmed down. She stopped in her tracks and blinked a few times when the fluttering returned just as quickly as it had stopped.
"What's this?" She looked down at herself, raising a hoof to her chest. "C'mon, you. Where are we going?"
She dismissed the stares she received for talking aloud to herself and continued walking in a jagged circle. When she had to stop to cross a street, she sighed and frowned at nothing in particular.
Where did his love line lead? Every step she took, she seemed to be getting further from the tug that usually guided her to a pony's match. When she turned around to walk the other way, she had the same feeling of putting distance between herself and the destination.
"No, no, no! It can't be that way, because it wasn't that way a moment ago!"
The ponies nearby shuffled to distance themselves from her while her wings drooped. Normally, her heart would serve as a divining rod once she was focused on a love line. Instead of fluttering when she was warm and slowing down when she was cold, it beat erratically and without any sense.
"Oh, chin up, Lovey." She raised her head. "Let's keep moving, hooves!"
She stopped at a coffee shop across the street from Eminence Tower. She took a deep breath and scanned the occupants of the room, nearly overwhelmed by the love lines tugging her heart in all different directions. Her gaze landed on the barista, a cute little mare who smiled back at her.
"Hello!" the mare chirped. Her blonde coat had a few stains on it, likely from coffee mishaps, and her chestnut-colored mane was tied back into a high ponytail. "What can I get ya?"
Lovey walked up to the counter. She glanced at the mare's name tag, which read 'Hello, my name is Cocoa Brew.' "Oh, something with lots of cream. Do you perhaps have something with strawberries? Or chocolate is fine, but I do so love strawberries. But it's a little too early for chocolate, don't you think?"
Cocoa's smile never wavered. "Well, I can make a strawberry smoothie, if you want, ma'am!"
Lovey tapped her chin to ponder this. "But I wonder..." She paused to stare intently at the mare. Her love line was still untapped! "You're single, aren't you?"
"Huh?" Cocoa blinked and tilted her head. "Y-Yes. Why?"
"There's a stallion, you see, and I'm trying to find him a special somepony." She stared at her again. This time, her heart seemed to be cooperating and started to pull her toward the door. "One moment, please!"
She trotted out onto the sidewalk, her heart beating firmly, and when she realized she was being led to Eminence Tower, she gasped. Frantically, she hurried back inside and to the counter. "Cocoa! Your love line leads to Eminence Tower!"
"My... what?" Cocoa furrowed her brow uncertainly. "I'm sorry, who are you?"
Lovey waved a hoof. "Forget about me! Do you know a stallion who works at Eminence Tower by the name of Magnate? He's tall, dark, and handsome."
Cocoa offered a weak smile and shrugged. "I suppose that name rings a bell? I'm sorry, I get a lot of customers from there, and I don't always get their names."
Lovey paced back and forth in thought. "He's a business pony, and you're destined for somepony there." She paused to test the theory by staring at her once more. "My heart can't be wrong! I mean, how many other single ponies are in the tower, anyway?"
"W-Well—"
"It's worth a shot!" She beamed at the mare. "I mean, after all, I'm sure you're a good coffee maker, and somepony who does business is sure to be happy with a mare that can make a good brew!" She paused, then squinted at her. "You can make a good brew, can't you?"
Cocoa's cheeks started to turn red. "I... Oh!" Completely flustered, she fumbled with a small cup. "I guess, um, how about a sample of our espresso? It's very popular."
Lovey smiled brightly. "That'll work!"
Cocoa worked the espresso machine, the blush never leaving her cheeks. She glanced up at Lovey as she handed over the cup. "C-Careful. It's hot."
Lovey paused to sniff the drink. It was rich, bitter, and heavy... She scrunched up her nose but still managed a smile. "It smells like business! Well, bottom's up!" Without any further delay, she tossed back the whole sample.
Cocoa stared with wide eyes. "Ma'am! Are you okay?!"
Lovey remained perfectly still. Her whole mouth and throat were screaming in pain, but the worst part of all was what she could taste before she had burned off all of her taste buds. Judging by how much she hated it, it was probably really good.
She managed a crooked smile. "F... Fine. I'm fine." She tried to breathe evenly. "Do you want to meet the stallion?"
Cocoa's face went bright red again. "Wh-Who is Magnate, exactly?"
Lovey finally regained her composure. She sighed before smiling at the mare. "Oh, he's a business pony. I'm told he's a little hard to get along with but I'm sure he's a softie because his sister cares so much about him!"
Cocoa’s brow furrowed in confusion before she tried to smile. "I see... Well, um, I have some free time on Wednesday. Is that okay?"
Lovey's wings fluttered in excitement. "Perfect! That gives me plenty of time to meet him!" She dropped several bits on the counter. "Is that enough for that espresso and a strawberry smoothie?"
Cocoa nodded slowly, still trying to catch up. "One strawberry smoothie, coming right up!"
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I'm really liking this story
I mean, the ending is inevitable, but I'll play along. Oh yeah, I just got here. Sorry for taking my time.
Oookay, she's not a matchmaker mare. She's a matchmaker robot. What in the name of...?
Well, onward, I suppose. How will this develop?
Some people might think this story is simplistic, but I don't see why that's a bad thing! After all, it's not the idea or how obvious the ending is (because honestly, how many people go to blockbuster hits like The Avengers or Frozen thinking that it's not going to end happily? I don't think anyone can't see the ending from 30 leagues away), it's how it's utilized. Anyone who discriminates based on the obviousness of an ending (ignoring if you're trying to avoid unhappy endings/etc) is just incredibly shallow and is clearly searching *really* hard for something to complain about.
I also like how Lovey's the sort of pony who goes above and beyond for her customers. After all, when you're a service that likely relies heavily on word-of-mouth, it's super important to make your customers happy (I imagine Lovey gets a lot of referrals)! So I think it's quite business-saavy that she's willing to try things she otherwise wouldn't like in order to up her customer service!
Its awesome!
Shouldn't this be… you know…Cadence’s thing?
Hahaha, that part with the espresso reminded me of Stargate SG1 when Ti'ilk downs the coffee pot in front of everyone.
To be honest, I passed this over a few times, and now I kinda regret not reading it sooner.
5934068
Cadance can't be there for every couple. It's just like Santa, the elves make the toys and deliver them he's just the manager and takes all the credit.
Against my better judgement, I like this genki yenta mare.
The ending's obvious, yes, and basically what 5712761 said. It makes me smile though, even if it's simple, so I'm cool.
She should take a side-job as Derpy's assistant.
Going to read this now, over the course of the next few days because distractions happen. Wish me luck!
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Stick to your guns, Lovey. Hold your ground and stay true.
Lovey stared, mouth agape, eyes wide. Her expression was that of sheer horror. Finally, after blinking a few times, she exclaimed, "Cancel all of my other appointments! I must go to Manehattan immediately!"
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Also... I must wonder if Lovey hasn't confused what her hearts telling her...
Or. OR! He could just be gay and doesn't want to tell.
Hmm...I'm getting the feeling I know who Magnate is destined to be with.
The words you write are always so charming, even buyouant after a fashion. They bounce you along, sentence to sentence, and put a smile on readers' faces all the while.
The cynical part of me is flashing warning signs so hard. The concept of this Lovey, this matchmaker mare, is raising so many red flags for me, not to mention how ponies would even put up with this. Like, I would find them hard to trust from the sheer absurdity of it all. Like someone who goes out and finds your love for you? Huh? Okcupid seems less intrusive.
However, I'm liking the characterization and how immersive the way this story is written it's almost bouncy. Like if Pinkie were a matchmaker or something. Plus, this is Equestria, and you're bound to find a fair number of super eccentric personalities. So yeah, I'm willing to put aside personal thoughts of cynicism for this. I mean, as absurd as I'm finding this story, I'm finding it too damn hilarious to let that little serious voice in my head ruin all the fun. Yeah, this seems like a very pony story so far.
Also, I'm gonna guess that Magnate is married to his job. Who has room for love when there's things to get done, a ladder to climb, and people watching your every move?
I'm back!
And I can already tell where this is going! Oh this is going to be goooood
As someone who reads Harlequin novels regularly, I can see where this is going. But that's not a bad thing.
Is it bad I'm only just reading this now? I think it is...
But Lovey is my kinda mare, so it's gunna be A.O.K!!! I think....
*Narrows eyes*
I think I'm thinking too much... Gah! It happened again!!!