Alice ventures to Equestria after her confrontation with Dr. Bumby. What will a girl do? All she knows of life is pain, suffering, and death. She will find out with her constant companion and her trusty blade. An AMR MLP crossover.
3146677 Just wondering what is monstrous and Is this a good thing? As for Alice's choice she can still go either way really. You will just have to keep reading to find out.
3169094 I will keep an eye out for the Alice thing in the future. As for the industrialized genocide thing. That was my bad. I didn't want to do too much research into something like that for a story.
I do think the methods fit with Equestria in general though. I mean you have chariots, carriages, and trains pulled by stallions as forms of transportation. Everyone just walks and pulls carts mostly.
As for cities, you have Canterlot, which is very fantasy like. You have Ponyville, a country town with timber framed homes and thatched roofs, apart from a few of the buildings. Next we have Manehatten, which seems to be an odd mash-up of modern and old. So I don't think efficiency is really their thing. Lets not forget The western towns they have as well. I blame magic for this odd and not efficient growth .
You are right though if they had a human from a later time frame the Rainbow Factory could become extremely efficient. Personally I am glad this isn't the case. I think it is hard enough for me to show some of the ponies working there in a somewhat positive light as it is.
3169704 There is nothing wrong with your description - it is consistent with the Rainbow Factory "canon". So even it there is an easy way to smoothen the process (The ponies are expecting to be banished, not killed. They would accept food from the staff. This way they could be sedated on their way to the factory, all but eliminating the need for guard duty - which would probably cut the needed number of the floor staff by half, and eliminating all the drama that slowly drives the employees insane) it wouldn't fit within the story; the pegasi sucking at it are an important part of the plot.
And I haven't done any research either - being Polish, I had some WW2 stories as compulsory reading at school. They contain plenty of examples of how extreme conditions can influence human psychology
3170085 Sorry for the late response, but I have been dealing with real life things this past week. I know what you mean about the chapter length, and I am going to do what I can to make the chapters shorter but still fairly long. I have also been really working on my other story lately as well, so that has caused some of the delays between the last update.
I will say that chapters should update sooner than they did last time, because I have a really decent idea of where I want it to go, and I don't plan on more double chapter updates. I mainly did that because I felt a chill chapter was needed after "Harvest Time".
I have made some good progress on the next chapter in this fic as it is. If you don't mind looking over it, like you said, and told me how to make it a gdoc. I would really appreciate your help. I don't want to inconvenience you though.
If you go through with this I will for sure be indebted to you, and give you the credit you deserve for this service. If you really don't mind doing this, either PM me or reply to this comment.
3146677 Just wondering what is monstrous and Is this a good thing? As for Alice's choice she can still go either way really. You will just have to keep reading to find out.
3169094 I will keep an eye out for the Alice thing in the future. As for the industrialized genocide thing. That was my bad. I didn't want to do too much research into something like that for a story.
I do think the methods fit with Equestria in general though. I mean you have chariots, carriages, and trains pulled by stallions as forms of transportation. Everyone just walks and pulls carts mostly.
As for cities, you have Canterlot, which is very fantasy like. You have Ponyville, a country town with timber framed homes and thatched roofs, apart from a few of the buildings. Next we have Manehatten, which seems to be an odd mash-up of modern and old. So I don't think efficiency is really their thing. Lets not forget The western towns they have as well. I blame magic for this odd and not efficient growth .
You are right though if they had a human from a later time frame the Rainbow Factory could become extremely efficient. Personally I am glad this isn't the case. I think it is hard enough for me to show some of the ponies working there in a somewhat positive light as it is.
Could you make more frequent updates with shorter chapters? It would make them easier to read.
Also, if you can link me the chapters in gdocs format, I guess I could do some proofreading for you, at least where it comes to typos.
3169704 There is nothing wrong with your description - it is consistent with the Rainbow Factory "canon". So even it there is an easy way to smoothen the process (The ponies are expecting to be banished, not killed. They would accept food from the staff. This way they could be sedated on their way to the factory, all but eliminating the need for guard duty - which would probably cut the needed number of the floor staff by half, and eliminating all the drama that slowly drives the employees insane) it wouldn't fit within the story; the pegasi sucking at it are an important part of the plot.
And I haven't done any research either - being Polish, I had some WW2 stories as compulsory reading at school. They contain plenty of examples of how extreme conditions can influence human psychology
3170085 Sorry for the late response, but I have been dealing with real life things this past week. I know what you mean about the chapter length, and I am going to do what I can to make the chapters shorter but still fairly long. I have also been really working on my other story lately as well, so that has caused some of the delays between the last update.
I will say that chapters should update sooner than they did last time, because I have a really decent idea of where I want it to go, and I don't plan on more double chapter updates. I mainly did that because I felt a chill chapter was needed after "Harvest Time".
I have made some good progress on the next chapter in this fic as it is. If you don't mind looking over it, like you said, and told me how to make it a gdoc. I would really appreciate your help. I don't want to inconvenience you though.
If you go through with this I will for sure be indebted to you, and give you the credit you deserve for this service. If you really don't mind doing this, either PM me or reply to this comment.
I just thought of a plot hole in Rainbow Factory:
If this process has been going on for about 500 years...
Then how did Derpy pass the flight test????????