Chapter Seven: Ad Libitum
She had never noticed how beautiful the stars were at night. It was almost comical to think about when one considered that Spitfire spent most of her time living in a city built upon clouds. Almost every night Spitfire was granted the opportunity to gaze upon them in a way that a large portion of Equestria was unable to. And yet despite all that, rarely had the pegasus taken a few minutes from her night to simply sit down and gaze up at the twinkling night sky. As she lay upon her cloud, Spitfire was reminded of all the times as a filly when she and her father would lay on the roof of their dainty shack and just watch the stars together. Given the long hours her father worked, the late evenings were often the only time the pair would find time to spend together, and even then he was often so tired he would drift asleep within a half-hour.
“Only one thing could make this night perfect,” Spitfire whispered under her breath as she stretched her hooves and crossed them behind her head. The pegasus allowed the weight of her eyelids to drift them shut whilst letting out a wistful sigh. “If only she were here.”
“Well howdy there,” a voice suddenly snapped the pegasus back to attention. Upon opening her eyes, Spitfire was greeted to the sight of the stetson-wearing orchard farmer standing over her. “Got room on yer cloud for one more?”
“Applejack?” the pegasus needlessly exclaimed as she clambered upright. “Where did you...how can you-” So utterly flabbergasted was the pegasus that she couldn’t even decide which question she wanted to ask first, let alone put it into words. The other pony just chuckled at her disorganized response, causing the pegasus to fluster in her embarrassment. “What are you doing here?” she eventually managed to stammer out.
“Ah’m here for you, of course,” Applejack answered as she gently inched closer to the pegasus. The sultry look that adorned her face made Spitfire’s heart almost skip a beat. “Ah couldn’t get you outta mah head after you left, especially since you left with such a fleeting little kiss.”
A flash of heat struck her face as Applejack traced a hoof up her chest with just the faintest of contact, just enough to tantalize her nerves. She inhaled sharply as the mare’s touch sent a shiver up her spine. “Well, I would be lying if I said that I hadn’t been a little disappointed with it as well,” Spitfire said.
The earth pony pressed a hoof against her chest while leaning in to whisper into Spitfire’s ear, “Then we’d best fix that, shouldn’t we?” The Wonderbolt was powerless against the other mare’s strength as she was pushed onto her back. Orange hooves linked around her neck as the weight of the farmer began to sandwich Spitfire against the cloud.
“You know, I’ve never been with an earth pony before,” Spitfire remarked as she brought her own hooves around the pony’s hips.
Flashing a coy smile, Applejack slowly drew her lips closer to the pegasus’. “Let me show what y’all been missing out on, then.”
BR-R-R-R-RINNGGGGG!
The tranquil air of the Wonderbolt’s bedroom was shattered as the alarm clock let out a piercing wail of rattling metal. With a disgruntled groan, a yellow hoof emerged from beneath the bedsheets and fruitlessly pawed around the bedside table for a few seconds before silencing the offending timepiece. “Why is it always just when it gets to the good part,” Spitfire muttered before she clambered out of bed. As much as she would have loved to have curled back up in bed in an attempt to pick up the dream where it left off, she had more pressing duties to attend to. It was back to the banality of her daily routine.
As her dinner last night had been cut short, it didn’t take long for the pangs of hunger to start hitting like a pair of hooves to the gut. Flicking on the radio while en route to the kitchen, Spitfire tried her best to push the thoughts of the lingering dream out of her head.
“Good morning Cloudsdale!” crowed the familiar voice of the radio DJ, Chatterbox, who was the closest thing to a morning companion Spitfire had. “Hope you all had a wonderful Hearts and Hooves Day; I know I did! Spent the whole last night hitting up the dance floor at Cloud Nine. And guess who this lucky pony got to hang out with while at the club? That’s right - my old friends, the Wonderbolts.”
“Oh goddess, I can see where this is going,” Spitfire sighed inwardly. She was half-tempted to flip off the radio at that point, but she was too busy pouring oats into her feed bag to care. Besides, it was better to know what ponies were saying than to be blindsided later on.
“The only thing that was more surprising than seeing Soarin’ still without a mare was the conspicuous absence of a certain Wonderbolt captain,” the radio DJ continued with an annoyingly suggestive undertone. Spitfire had to wonder if these ponies had anything better to do with their lives than speculate on a celebrity’s personal life. “Now Soarin’ and the other Wonderbolts weren’t in a very chatty mood, but it was pretty plain to see that somepony had special plans for Hearts and Hooves and wanted to keep it a secret. One thing’s for certain, the colts at the Canterlot Chronicles are going to be on the look-out for the hot-headed flier.”
“Let ‘em try,” Spitfire just rolled her eyes as the DJ continued on her gossip rant. After securing her feed bag over her snout, the pegasus carried on with her morning training routine. She was willing to bet by the next morning, she’d have paparazzi staking out her home in hopes of catching a glimpse of whoever her new squeeze was. She almost felt sorry for the ones who’d be waiting forever for someone who was never coming, even if Spitfire wished they could.
But who was she kidding? A small-town farmer wasn’t going to be willing to put up with the kind of media-attention that made up most of Spitfire’s days. If the paparazzi even caught a whiff of the earth pony, Sweet Apple Acres would be swarmed with tabloid reporters. As much as Spitfire would’ve liked to have seen the farmer again, she didn’t want to subject her to that kind of treatment. It was easy for the pegasus to avoid the press, but Applejack was earth-bound and had a farm and responsibilities.
“Maybe I could send her a letter or something,” Spitfire pondered as she scooped up a pair of rubber balls with her wings. “No, that’s way too impersonal.” As she juggled the balls with her wings, honing her fine-motor skills, the pegasus mulled over her predicament. “It would be fun to see her again, and nopony would ever think of looking for me at a farm. It wouldn't be too hard to keep quiet.” Sadly, with Applejack living all the way down in Ponyville, subtlety was next to impossible for her. The moment she showed up at Applejack’s door, it’d be obvious what her desires and intent were. Also, just showing up at her doorstep felt like an act of desperation, and despite how she felt towards her current station in life, she would never, ever stoop to desperation. She had far too much pride for that.
“In other news, preparations are almost complete for the 42nd Annual Royal Barnstorming Championship in Manehattan. All eyes this year will be on the Wonderbolts and their gryphon rivals, the Golden Eagles. I managed to sit down with the Golden Eagles’ trainer a couple days ago, we’ll play that interview for you ponies right after a message from our sponsors!”
“Now I know what they meant by the whole ‘it’s lonely at the top’ thing,” she sighed between mouthfuls of oats. The Wonderbolt captain resigned to her fate for the time being with the hope that her work would give her something constructive to focus on and maybe put her in a better mood.
*****************************
“Fleet Foot, slow down already! You keep pulling ahead of the others!” Spitfire shouted with the aid of a megaphone from her vantage point in the bleachers. The Cloudsdale coliseum was devoid of cheering fans as it often was in the early hours of the day. On some days there would be the stray pegasus stopping by to watch the aerobatic team going through their training exercises, but the day after Hearts and Hooves Day was one that many needed to rest and recover from the night before. “That was horrible, do it again!”
And the other members of the Wonderbolts were no exception to this common occurrence. Spitfire watched as a trio of her fellow fliers went through a complex routine of loops, dives, and rolls, only to sigh in resignation and shout another bout of critics at them. At least half of them were tired out from having spent most of the previous night at dance clubs of one variety or the other, and she was certain that at least two of them were hung-over. On top of that, there was also no sign of Soarin’, but she had expected that considering the night prior. None of the Wonderbolts dared to even bring up what happened at the Velvet Saddle nor inquire as to how the rest of her date went. In fact, most of the Wonderbolts were giving the captain a wide berth that morning; although, that did spare them the wrath of her bellowing.
Though last night ended well, Spitfire couldn’t bring herself to be in better spirits. Yes, the date had gone well, but that was it. It was as Soarin’ had told her - it was a charity date and nothing more. She had tasted the fruit of the apple tree, but now she was back in the clouds where trees did not grow and only her job to keep her mind occupied.
“Come on! Are you Wonderbolts or prissy fillies? Tighten that formation!” Watching her fellow Wonderbolts pull another manoeuvre high above, Spitfire tried in vain to keep the orchard farming from infecting her thoughts. She swore she could still smell that faint apple fragrance the earth pony carried with her, which only served to frustrate her further. And as many of her teammates could attest to, a distracted Spitfire was often a cranky one. “Okay, stop that!” Spitfire bellowed to her teammates. “Wonderbolts, assemble. Double-time, ponies!”
“Is something wrong, cap’n?” one of the Wonderbolts asked as they gathered before her. Even though they were all familiar with Spitfire’s drive for perfection, a few of the members were visibly confused. Spitfire had a reputation for pushing her team hard to achieve perfection
“That was one of the worst Falling Helix manoeuvres I have ever seen,” Spitfire said, pointing the megaphone at a white-maned Wonderbolt. “Fleet Foot, you can’t keep flying so fast. You keep slipping out of position and your helix winds up looking like a plummeting parakeet.”
“Oh come on, captain,” Fleet Foot replied, “it’s not my fault that High Wind can’t keep up.”
“No, but it’s your fault for only thinking of yourself,” the captain admonished. “The Wonderbolts is not about individual achievement, it’s about teamwork and coordination. If you want to show-boat about being the fastest, then go back to the racetracks. I have no room for that kind of egoism on my team. Now, we’ve got a big competition coming up, and we’re going to show those griffins how real flying is done!” After a round of reluctant acknowledgments from the rest of the team, Spitfire motion for one of them to approach. “Rapidfire, I want you to watch the rest of these filly-fliers for me. I want ten flawless Falling Helix in a row and you’re going to make sure they don’t cut any corners.”
Once she passed off the megaphone and her duties over to the senior Wonderbolt, Spitfire retreated into the coliseum's backhalls. Her sour mood was starting to spill onto the rest of the team and she needed an excuse to get away from them before she burned her team out. Spitfire, at the very least, had enough sense to know when her personal life (or lack thereof) was starting to impede her professional life. She hoped that a short break and perhaps a cup of tea would be enough to temper her mood.
That plan hit a slight hitch, however, when Spitfire reached the break-room and saw Soarin’ sitting at the table with a cup of coffee in hoof and sporting a pineapple-shaped bruise upon his cheek. The two pegasus made brief eye contact but said nothing at first. It was a song and dance that the pair had gone through numerous times over the course of their friendship: uncomfortable silences; week-long matches of ‘who can ignore who longer’; major disruptions to their practice routines; and eventually an awkward apology from one of the ponies. Had there not been a major competition coming up, Spitfire would have been more than willing to go through the usual routine with Soarin’, but she couldn’t leave her feud with him unsettled. The competition needed the Wonderbolts at their best and infighting between the captain and her number two flier would only distract them. Armed with a fresh cup of tea, Spitfire swallowed her pride and sat at the table.
“I’m...sorry I hit you in the face with a pineapple.”
Soarin’ glanced up from his coffee for a brief moment, eyeing the pegasus with a scrutinizing glare, before turning his cheek with a harumph.
This actually caught Spitfire by surprise. Normally once the apologies were out in the open, the two ponies resolved their differences quickly. This was the first time that Soarin’ had actually snubbed her attempt at apologizing. “Seriously?” Spitfire quipped with a hint of annoyance. “We’ve got a competition coming up and you’re giving me the cold shoulder?” Again, no response from the other pegasus. “Come on, this isn’t the first time I’ve hit you with a piece of fruit. Remember the watermelon incident? And you still have the scar from that.”
“This isn’t about the pineapple,” Soarin’ responded at last.
“Then what is it about?”
“You don’t remember?” Soarin’ appeared to be even more annoyed with his captain at this point, which only confused her further. When Spitfire could only give him a baffled gaze and an uncertain shrug, he let out a discouraged sigh. “Big and round; golden brown; flakey crust; sweet, delicious apples and cinnamon. Ring any bells?”
“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” Spitfire said incredulously. If she hadn’t heard him say it just then, she never would have believed it. “You’re upset because I didn’t bring you back a pie?”
“You said you would!”
“I said I would try to bring you back a pie!” Spitfire reminded him of their previous conversation on the subject. She also reminded him that not only was a date not the ideal place to ask about buying a pie, the chances that Applejack would have had a pie that late in the day were marginal at best. “Besides, I made you that promise before you went out and acted like a colossal jerk. And now you expect me to just fly back to Ponyville, knock on Applejack’s door, and-” But then an idea came to mind; an idea that immediately made Spitfire’s eyes light up. “Oh my goddess, that’s perfect, Soarin’!” she exclaimed before her face was consumed by an ear-to-ear grin. “First you get the pie...then you get the mare.”
*****************************
“It was just one date, Applejack; it’s nothing to get hung up about. Any pony should be thanking their lucky stars to have a chance to go out on a date with you! By the way, are you doing anything tonight?” As Rainbow Dash flashed her most hopeful grin, her reflection in the mirror did little to inspire confidence. “No, that’s too forward,” she silently sighed with a frown. The temporary librarian had spent more of her time running through the inevitable conversation she would have with Applejack than she had spent tending to the library. A few dozen books that still needed to be returned to their shelves were of small consequence when compared to the importance of ensuring her next encounter with the orchard farmer went perfectly. Not that Dash even knew of the current state of the library given that she had been spending her time in the backroom with Twilight’s vanity mirror.
While she remained oblivious as to the exact outcome of the date, Rainbow Dash was confident that there was no way that Spitfire would have any further interest in her friend. There was just no way that a famous aerobatic star like Spitfire would have anything to do with a farmer from Ponyville. That was the Wonderbolt’s loss, of course, since Dash couldn’t think of any pony she’d rather be with than Applejack. A part of Dash did feel bad about intentionally giving her friend poor advice but it was for the best. Spitfire and Applejack were from two separate worlds; it would never work out.
“Just remember, this is for Applejack,” Dash reminded herself.
“What’s for me?” a familiar voice suddenly popped up behind Dash, which was followed a moment later by the appearance of Applejack’s reflection in the mirror.
“AJ!” Dash gasped as she swung about to see that her friend had arrived far earlier than expected. “Wh-what are you doing here so early? You don’t take over until after lunch.”
“We need to have a little chat, Dash,” Applejack stated with a resolute look across her face. “Ah know what you’ve been up to.”
Dash felt a sudden tightness in her chest. How much did Applejack already know? Had she found out everything, including how she felt about the earth pony? Not wanting to divulge more than than she needed to, she simply feigned ignorance and let Applejack show her cards first. “I...I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Applejack just frowned for a moment. She might have been a simple country pony but she wasn’t a fool, and Dash’s blatant dishonesty was as plain as daylight. “Ah wasn’t born yesterday, y’know. Ah know you set that whole mess at the auction block up to get me on a date with Spitfire.” Without even giving Dash a chance to respond, she wrapped her hooves around the pegasus in a loving hug. “And that was the sweetest thing a friend has ever gone for me.”
That wasn’t what Rainbow Dash had expected, but it was better than she had feared. The warmth of her friend’s embrace brought a sudden flash eat to Dash’s face, and the faint scent of apples in farmer’s mane threw all her pre-prepared speeches out the window. Even though she knew it was for all the wrong reasons, Dash treasured every second of their embrace.
“Ah gotta admit, it was awfully clever of you, even if it was a might bit unnecessary,” Applejack joked after she pulled away from Dash. “Next time you want to hook me up with a date, just ask me. T’ain’t no need to go sneaking around mah back and everything.”
“How did you-”
“Applebloom gave ya up,” the earth pony revealed with a smug grin. “But Ah had a hunch from the start that Spitfire confirmed when she told me it was because of you she was at the auction in the first place.” Now Dash knew for a fact that she never suggested the auction to Spitfire but she wasn’t about to correct Applejack on that. “Plus that advice you gave me yesterday struck me as a might silly at first. Heh, y’know, for a second Ah actually thought you were trying to mess up mah date, but it all made sense when Ah found out that Spitfire was a country-pony too. Like Ah said - very clever, Dashie. Had me completely fooled.”
“She’s a what?” Dash almost wanted to scream out at that point. She was arguably one of Spitfire’s biggest fans and even she didn’t know that detail of the pegasus’ life. At the same time, being such a huge fan was one of the reasons that Applejack was so willing to believe that it was all part of a master plan. It just went to show that a pony was much more willing to believe a lie when they had to work to get it. “H-heh, I guess I should’ve known better than to try and pull a fast one over you. I take it the date went well then?” she asked. Somehow the other pony failed to notice her apprehension.
“It was a little bit bumpy at first, but it wasn’t nuttin’ a good old fashion barnhouse dance couldn’t fix,” Applejack said. Once again, her pride in having turned the night around was evident in the satisfied grin across her face. “Ah can’t remember the last time Ah had that much of fun on Hearts and Hooves Day, and if it hadn’t been for you, Dash, Ah would’ve spent it all sitting behind a counter selling pies and fritters. So again, thank you. Ah really mean it.”
The hoof set upon her shoulder felt bittersweet to Dash. Had events unfolded as Applejack had believed so, Dash should have felt an overwhelming sense of pride and joy at her accomplishments. This was not the victory she pegasus had hoped for, and the only thing that was harder than accepting this truth, was pretending that she was happy with the lie.
“So do you think you’re going to see her again?” It was a question that Dash dreaded the possible answer to, but hated the lingering uncertainty even more.
Dash felt a flash of hope when her friend gave an uncertain shrug. “Ah wouldn’t mind it, but Ah doubt she’d be all that interested in going out again. She’s a big-shot celebrity after all and Ah’m just a regular ol’ farmer. We’re just from two different worlds, y’know? We had fun and all, but it’s probably all for the best that we just go our separate ways. What ya did was nice and all, Dash, but ya gotta admit that she was a bit outta mah league.”
“What do you mean ‘out of your league’?” Dash questioned as she saw a perfect opportunity to make her move. “Applejack, you are one of the most honest, most dependable ponies in Ponyville, maybe even in all of Equestria. You’re one of the best friends a pony could ever ask for! Why between you and Spitfire, I’d pick you any day of the week. And if Spitfire knew what she was missing out on, she’d have flown back to Ponyville in an instant!”
“Hey, Applejack! Are you in here?” a familiar voice called out from the far side of the library.
“Nooooooo.”
“Spitfire?”
“No, no, no!”
Sadly, Dash’s worst fears were confirmed when the Wonderbolt captain trotted into view, smiling brightly upon seeing Applejack. “Hey AJ! Oh, and hello Rainbow Dash. I’m not interrupting anything, am I?” the new arrival asked. Dash got the feeling that even if she had been interrupting, Spitfire wouldn’t have cared. It was clear to her what the Wonderbolt’s intentions were, but once again Dash found herself powerless to do anything about it. The only grounds she could intervene on were her own intentions for Applejack, and she couldn’t do that after Applejack had praised her for being such a good friend.
“Oh, n-nothing,” Dash answered. “We were just talking about...stuff.”
“Stuff, huh?” Spitfire mused with a playful grin. Given Dash’s hesitant answer, she had a suspicion of what said ‘stuff’ entailed.
Applejack may have been modest but the pegasus’ timely arrival couldn’t have been a coincidence. In fact, she wouldn’t have put it past Dash to have played yet another part in this little set-up. Since she didn’t want to embarrass Rainbow Dash further, she kept silent and played along. “So what brings you back around to Ponyville?” she asked. “Ain’t it usually customary to wait two days after the first date?”
“Normally I’d agree, but I have a bit of an emergency on my hooves. I tried to find you at Sweet Apple Acres but your sister told me you had already gone into town,” Spitfire answered. True, it wasn’t that much of an emergency, but it was a better answer to give than ‘I couldn’t get you out of my mind.’ “I need a pie, pronto. And preferably in the biggest size you make.”
“A pie, huh?” Applejack mused as she quickly deduced the reason behind the odd request. “Well our pies do come in the ‘sorry Ah hit you in the face with a pineapple’ size. Would that be big enough?”
“If it’s not too much trouble,” the Wonderbolt chuckled.
Never one to turn down a pony in need, especially for a cause as noble as repairing a wounded friendship, Applejack didn’t hesitate for a second to promise her aid. “T’ain’t no problem at all, but we don’t normally carry pies that big. Ah’ll have to make one fresh for ya.”
“Will that take long?” Spitfire asked with feigned hesitancy. In truth, she wanted it to take as long as possible so she’d have an excuse to spend as much time with the earth pony as possible. “I’d really hate to have to return to Cloudsdale empty hoofed, and this would mean so much to Soarin’.” Though it wasn’t necessary, Spitfire felt it wouldn’t hurt to embellish the story a bit. Her friend would have been content with a normal Apple family pie, but a little dishonesty would get him an even bigger pie and give Spitfire more time with her prize. If everyone got what they wanted, what harm was there in a little stretching of the truth?
“Don’tchu fret, Ah can get to work on it right away,” Applejack reassured her.
“Awesome! Do you mind if I tag along and help? I’m not much of a baker but I’ve always wanted to learn.” That was another blatant lie. The last time she used an oven, she started a small fire and was banned from the kitchen for the rest of her childhood. In all honesty, baking required more patience than Spitfire was willing to put forth.
“You’re more than welcome to,” the farmer agreed. Baking a pie wasn’t the most stimulating of activities, after all, and Applejack appreciated the prospect of having some company for the afternoon. However, that thought triggered another realization in the earth pony and she immediately turned to Rainbow Dash, who had up until then been trying her best to pretend that she wasn’t listening in on the conversation. “Say, uh, Dash, don’t suppose Ah could ask you to watch over the library for me this afternoon? Ah promise Ah’ll make it up to you.”
What Rainbow Dash would have given to have been able to say ‘no’ at that moment; some reasonable or legitimate excuse that she could use to force Applejack to stay in the library and prevent this faux-date from occurring. But there was nothing she could think of that would allow her to come out of the situation without losing face in front of Spitfire and Applejack. To add salt to the wound, Dash had to pretend not to just be okay with it, but happy about it.
“Hey, don’t worry, AJ! I’ve got this covered,” Dash said with a reassuring grin. The other two seemed convinced by the pegasus’ false platitudes and headed on their way. Once Dash had given them both several minutes to put a safe distance between them, she let out a frustrated cry. That blasted Wonderbolt showing up just at the right time to ruin Dash’s haphazardly-laid plans. Was fate out to get her or was she simply the unluckiest pony in town? Both felt equally true for Dash at the moment. It was enough to make a pony want to curl up in bed and just forget about the whole darn world. But after the pegasus pounded her head against the nearest solid object she could find, she found herself staring at the hardcover tome of Daring Do. “Daring wouldn’t give up,” Dash realized as she sprung back to her hooves. “This isn’t over until I say it’s over!”
It was time to take a more proactive role, and she knew just where to start.
Just got around to finishing reading this fic and what happens?!?!? Updates as soon as I finish... So much win!
Now to read!
Uh I noticed one spelling mistake but other than that fantastic
The warmth of her friend’s embrace brought a sudden flash eat to Dash’s face, i think you meant heat.
Can't wait until next chapter!
Yay! update!
And Dash is back in the game (I hope)!
Poor Dashie. By the way, didn't Applejack state earlier she also really liked Rainbow? And neither of them have ever brought their feelings up to the other one yet? Seems a little silly, but I do suppose that's how young relationships work on occasion.
OHNONONONONO, DASHIE.
In your kind of situation, one of the only things worse than what you chose is to break them up.
I literally threw up my arms and said (not shouted, people are sleeping in the house ) "YES!"
Great chapter. You go get her Dashie!
-Glassed
ow maaan... i feel so bad for dashie
I HATE SPITFIRE ATM
anyway... great chapter as always
SONOVA.... poor, poor Dashie T__T Argh. I hate this story now but can't stop reading it. I hate this kind of drama. But once ya start, ya gotta see it through to the end (which will hopefully be a happy ending) or it'll eat at your brain for ages. AAAARRRGGGHHH! Curse you, Commissar!
Another fantastic chapter, and I can't help but love the story more and more with each one!
I'm not entirely sure how all this will end but I fear that somepony will be heartbroken. Still, the way things are going I'm actually looking forward to a little bit of emotional drama after this buildup when the truth finally comes out. I'm hoping for some comedy for the next chapter though, Dash will probably try to tamper with the bake-date, won't she?
On one hand I'm all 'awwwwww Dashie' but on the other hand I'm all 'yaaay Spitfire and AJ!', so ... good work, author.
Out of the frying pan.....
Dash, you're an idiot.
My heart goes out to poor, lil' Dashie, but I can't hate on Spitfire either. I'm so unbelievably sad for Rainbow Dash, though. SO SAD.
A few spelling errors here and there. And whoa. . whoa. . It's like Equestria is trying to pair Spitfire and Applejack together. Fight on Rainbow Dash!
Heh, sorry Dash, but I'm rooting for Spitfire and AJ. I really like their connection.
Haven't finished the chapter yet, just had to question the whole "feed bag" thing. Methinks you might be taking the whole tiny horse concept a bit too far... I mean, they're intelligent creatures capable of speech and rational thought beyond that of pure instinct. Would you like to have a bag of food strapped to your face so that it covers your mouth and nose? Ponies have cups, plates and cutlery, and it isn't just the unicorns that can use them. Maybe it's just me nitpicking, but that part really bothered me.
Don't get me wrong, I also take issue with ponies being able to manipulate certain things with just their hooves--like melee weaponry, for one. There was one story I read in which an Earth Pony was described as gripping a pair of swords in his forelegs (I honestly can't remember the name of the fic, which is mildly distressing)! I'll acknowledge and even fight for a pony's ability to manipulate certain things by gripping them between hoof and leg, but trying to swing a weapon around like that is the best possible way to send it flying into an uncontrolled spin, not to mention the whole falling-flat-on-your-face thing.
But I'm digressing, as usual. On with the chapter!
582107
Not wanting to reveal too much, but simply put Spitfire makes use of the feed bag so she can eat without having to focus all her attention on the task. She'd rather work on her training than sit down for ten minutes to eat breakfast.
583771
Well, I can see that, but my question was more about asking why they would have feed bags at all. You're importing a real-world concept that would have little reason to exist in Equestria, and that's my point. Because ponies aren't the beasts of burden that horses are in our world, I find it difficult to swallow that anyone would ever have invented something like the feed bag, because ponies are intelligent and they have a sense of personal dignity, meaning that one would normally balk at the idea of having a bag of food strapped over their face.
I'm only going at this because the mention of it broke my immersion so completely--it takes something pretty jarring to shake me out of the story enough to comment on it before I'm even done with the chapter. If it's somehow relevant to the plot, then you can go right ahead and ignore my bitching.
585584
I fail to follow your reasoning that a feed bag somehow deprives an individual of their dignity or that somehow this concept would be shunned as a sort of social taboo. What we have is a simple item that allows one to eat their meal while still being able to perform other tasks at the same time. It has more reason to exist than the saddles they've frequently worn or the doors they've designed. Also, I saw a fairly simple parallel between a feed bag and those silly hats people have with the cupholders and straws built into them. It's not relevant to the plot, but it is a facet of Spitfire's character.
Why must you hurt Dashie so?
590143 It is a good pain
I think that about sums up how I feel for Dashie.
I have been inspired by this story to write a double Daring/Rainbow story of my own. I really like this format of 2 stories in one. Keep up the good work!
you just made 1 more fan today. i have to say i'm a big AppleDash fan but right now i'm really pulling for spitfire. i feel bad for Dash but i just really enjoy Spitfire character in this story alas i already know whos wining this. i noticed you really love using that word, alas that is. i think in the 2ed chapter you used it like 3 time lol. i dont know, just felt like bring this up
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i wouldnt have normally brought this up or said anything since the feeding bag isnt a big deal (to me at least) but since someone else did the "bringing" i'm gonna go and throw my two cents in and go with SatoshiKyu on this. think about this, if your boss walks up to you and told you "starting tomorrow everyone will be required to use a feed bag to "increase work performance" what would you think? the ponies in this world are more or less humans and can almost do anything any human can do "some how". play baseball, write letters, play the piano (an earth pony on the left of octavia is somehow playing one), read, do complex math, anything really. they also have the same morals, right? would you ever see any person using a feed bag? don't you think tying food to ones face cause they dont have time to feed themselves just sounds wrong or atleast silly? i'm only saying all this so you can be aware of how others may see this and what could cause a reader to leave. sure, right now nobody gonna leave being so invested in your story but what if this happen early? some people my be turn off over something this silly and your story could lose views or even make others thumb down.
this isnt me asking you to change it or anything, i personally don't care that much. just trying to make you aware, like i said already dont fret to much over this and keep making this story for me. i hunger for more. can't wait to see the next bit of drama and romance. doing a fine job here.
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The thing is, the moment you put 'everyone will be required' you've changed the situation altogether. And I do not deny that the idea of a pony wearing a feed bag would look silly, especially if one were to do it in public in the same sense that I think those people with the cup-holding hardhats or those nacho sombreros look silly.
But nobody is forcing anything on Spitfire (aside from me that is); this is something she is choosing of her own free will in the privacy of her own home. It's supposed to be telling of her character - that her dedication to her training regime supersedes even the basic notion of having a dignified breakfast.
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your right about the whole ''forcing'' thing but i think you missed my point (or maybe i failed at the delivery ) if i changed ''everyone will be required'' to "i want everyone" woundnt it more or less get the same response? maybe change boss to friend as well so one doesnt feel like they gotta or they're being forced. and yes, using it is telling of the character but one may get "obsession" over "passionate". the feed beg itself only exist cause a farmer wanted to put zero effort into feeding their animals so why would it be here? i'm not expecting an answer to any of this and im definitely not telling you to not use this or anything else for that matter. twilight had a saddle at one point and that makes very little sense. just trying to make you aware.
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You're assuming I want a distinction between passion and obsession
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oh may! i guess its really telling then. if it an obsession then i hope its not to unhealthy
Hmm. One reason I think we humans don't use feedbags (especially while hiking) is because we can walk and feed ourselves at the same time. Look at the Camelback hydration system: it's a drinkbag, basically, which humans sometimes use when they need their hands to do something else (carry a gun, or grip trekkiing poles). Now, to walk, a pony (almost ) always needs at least three legs on the ground - walking without four legs is pretty awkward for them. So the benefit of being able to walk or fly and snack at the same time, without having to stop, would make a feedbag sensible at least for hikers, trekkers, soldiers, or anyone who has to walk a lot. Literally strapping on the feedbag at home is a little weird but still makes sense.
Another reason is that if we tried to make a feedbag for humans it'd be very difficult to eat out of, just because of how our faces are built. Equines would actually be able to use a feedbag (though admittedly the MLP animation style weakens this argument slightly, especially for most female ponies).
It's a cultural element that doesn't really parallel ours - I guess it could be potentially demeaning to a human, given the implication that the wearer couldn't feed himself or herself. But to a pony, especially a practical one, it's form over function - I can't eat and get my work done without this, so why not wear it?
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Note that "everyone will be required" and "i [sic] want everyone" get more-or-less the same response because, from most bosses, they are the same thing. Also, I think that feedbags exist so that farmers can save time by allowing horses to munch without stopping to eat grass - it seems like less work to turn a horse loose in a field and dump their food into a bucket (or spread some hay, or let them graze) than to fill a feedbag, put the feedbag on the horse, and then later have to take the feedbag back off and clean it, and still have to feed the horse most of his or her food the normal way. It saves time (so the farmer can get more work done or the driver can go further) but not effort on the part of the driver. I guess it also gives the horse something to munch on if there's nothing natural around to eat (like the horses that go around in a circle at the fair). If someone's horsier than I am feel free to correct me here.
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gotta say comparing the feed bag to a Camelbak does make it a little less awkward but i also say that i see a big differences in having a little straw an inch away form your lips than a whole meal in a bag tied to your face, just saying. you also dont have to think too hard about ''what makes sense" in this world to much. if anyone can recall from the "The Cutie Mark Chronicles" ep that during AJ's flash back she was holding a bag on a stick (you know< what a hobo is normally depicted with. i dont know what its called ) but she really wasnt. it was just there floating on her back. logic should had made it fall but it didnt. i'm not saying throw reason out the window or anything of course. a real big scene can be ruin for the reader if something to "mind blowing" or "law of physics breaking" happened. just that for the smaller moments it shouldnt get in the way of storytelling.
about the whole boss thing. i gotta say thats why i also said change boss to friend, right? you really shouldn't feel forced then. i can also add that there isnt always grass around for your horse. a horse eats when ever it wishes sometime and you cant make it eat. instead of waiting around you use a feed bag. they get to eat and you go inside and do whatever. no real clean up after ether. just take the bag really. you dont put no thing in one that would require a clean up normally. truth be truth you kinda can force one to eat with one. some just dont like have the bag on and would eat just so you can remove it after. if something was blocking your mouth and nose from air woldnt you want it gone?
wow all this here over a lil' thing like a feed bag. i guess that proves we're just so "passionate" over yer story or more like i'm "obsessing" over something silly i would say we but i'm really the one that just cant stop coming back i guess i cant help but respond
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Mystery Science Theatre 3000
I think we all could use a little more of this.
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i reckon so didnt read the whole thing yet but the lil' bite i did told me enough.
Extremely engaging fic so far, my good sir.
I tend to skim over the Daring Doo parts, but it certainly doesn't retract from the tension!
Please keep this going. I'm dying to know what happens next!
Gah! This is so brutal for Rainbow. She likes Applejack, and wants her for herself, but she also looks up to Spitfire as an idol and possible future team-mate. Spitfire is very similar to Dash, making the connection between AJ and Spitfire believable (seeing as AJ and Dash already have a similar dynamic) but also painful to read because it should be Dash with AJ instead. And the whole mess is Dash's fault because she couldn't just tell AJ she liked her! This is some She's the Man level shenanigans you have cooked up - and I love it. I can't hate on anyone, and can only hope that Soarin still being suspiciously single means he's pining after Spitfire and that everything will be resolved with the least amount of heartbreak possible. Also, the Daring Do and Blondie subplot is also awesome. Its like getting two great stories for the price of one. Keep it up, I look forward to the next thrilling installment
This story has so much going for it. I won't bother writing a lengthy comment because it's late at night but rest assured if I were to go through and list off all the individual aspects of this story you'd come up spades.
If you'd like me to write a more detailed review feel free to ask.
I can't tell if I like Appledash more or Spitjack.
Oh and I love the story within a story. If that's what a Daring Do novel is like then I wish it existed.
I'm also really loving the references to classics so far I've noticed:
-Casa Blanka
-The Good the Bad the Ugly
-Dirty Harry
-Notting Hill
I'm sure there's more I haven't noticed.
Anyway, I'm loving you story, and if you'd like me to write something a review that's a little more in depth feel free to ask.
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A castle reference? I love that show and I didn't pick up on it. What was it?
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I personally rather like the feed bag myself. I see it as something a pony would find in an athletic store, allowing one to eat breakfast/lunch/etc. and work out at the same time, and thus a perfectly logical item for someone like Spitfire to own.
In lieu of the usual "this story was great, blah blah blah", I'm just going to point out the errors, just because they were the one thing that bugged me.
"the colts at the Canterlot Chronicles are going to be the look-out..." Shouldn't that say ON the look-out?
I'm pretty sure that with brittish or english spelling, either way there is no "o" in maneuver
"infighting between the captain of her number two flier" should be "infighting between the captain and her number two flier"
559412 Bitch please,
th08.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/f/2012/094/2/d/applefire__by_jinyaranda-d4v0g3d.jpg
AppleFire is the way to go.
I would have punched Soarin for the way he acted about the pie. Seriously, it was like a child misbehaving and then wondering why they don't get a toy or dessert.
I hate and yet love this set up. I can't really be mad at Spitfire, she's done nothing wrong, but as an Appledash fan, I want to see them get together, but everything seems to go against that goal.
Keep up the amazing work.
god damnit stop making me love this ship i came here for the appledash!!!
I find myself in a quandary. I really love the Daring Do and Blondie story, but I hate love triangle stories more than anything.
I know no one's together yet, but the way Dash keeps getting subdued and forced to watch this play out is starting to feel a bit on the cuck side, and it's starting to piss me off like such a story would. Here's hoping the next chapter... chapter 8, clears that up immediately.
Dang it! I feel bad for Rainbow but at the same time happy for Spitfire. Brain stop confusing me!
Man, this is one of those situations where you can't hate anyone in the love triangle, cause they're all too damn likable. My poor, poor brain...
I liked the sneaky Scarface reference there. Also, nice job making it not sound contrived.
all the while AJ and spitfir have fun, rainbow dash sits in the corner. crying her eyes out... holder herself stuttering "no.... why? NO! .... i BUCKed up..."
she moans and rolls over...
just just ughhhhbh gawd damn it rainbow when will you learn your only making it worse
It's hard to be on Dash's side in the least when she has been explored very minimally in this fic
My brain... what is it doing?
I love Rainbow to bits, and though I fully ship PinkieDash I can't bring myself to hold any happiness in this situation. Applejack turned out happy, Spitfire is happy, but Rainbow is stuck crying in a corner. I can't hate Spitfire for messing things up, I can't hate Applejack for much because none of this was her idea (but that initial kiss did kinda set this whole ball rolling...) and I sure can't hate Dashie, she's just doing what she does trying to make things go her way without bucking things up. We all saw how great that went
I can't take a side here, and that hurts my brain. What are you doing to me?!