Friendship is Card Games: Pinkie Pie and the Rockin' Ponypalooza Party! · 12:12pm Oct 24th, 2021
This week, we return to the Berrow catalogue. While the previous entry offers the closest thing we have to Cadence’s canonical backstory, this one has actually been referenced in the show. Ponypalooza’s mentioned in “The Mane Attraction,” among other details. Let’s begin.
And we open with a Ponyville weather report. Seems that even the official stuff isn’t free of some fanfic clichés.
Ah, a relatively solid point on the timeline. This is a week after Winter Wrap-Up. There’s still the question of how many years since Nightmare Moon’s return, but that way lies madness. And Ponyville was able to get it done on schedule again this year. I wonder if Twilight is still helping coordinate everything.
“The ponies loved being greeting by flowers and butterflies, rather than snowflakes and chilly breezes.”
Leading to the question of why they even institute winter to begin with, but that’s probably a factor of going along with the global climate rather than blind tradition and pressure from the Cloudsdale snow lobby. Probably.
Pinkie shouting at the top of her lungs for all to hear way too early in the morning. Yeah, that sounds about right.
Huh. Pinkie has a window box with flowers in it. I honestly hadn’t expected that. Gummy clamping down on anything put in front of him, that makes sense. And apparently Pinkie managed to grow the worst-tasting flowers in Ponyville. You can take the mare off the rock farm, but…
Twilight gifting Pinkie with a day planner is honestly perfect. I wonder how much unknowing influence Twilight had on the party dossiers in the Pinkiecave.
And it’s the worst possible thing Pinkie could imagine: A day with nothing fun planned. She’s crushed for seconds before deciding to make up a reason to celebrate.
I wasn’t expecting the umlaut in “flügelhorn,” but I do appreciate a good diacritic.
Ah. Pinkie’s not quite up to the organization we see by “Party Pooped;” she can’t find a Crystal Empire flag she has stashed away for special flag purposes. Instead, inspiration strikes through Gummy and a set of footwear suspiciously similar to a certain kind employed by a certain red-crested breegull.
Berrow notes Pinkie’s unusually short travel time, but credits it to bouncing everywhere rather than trotting. I suppose the target audience isn’t quite ready to grasp the particulars of hyperspace. Though in this case, having actual springs strapped to all four hooves works as well. Too well, given how quickly Pinkie gets sent out of the city limits.
Pinkie Pie landing in the middle of town via ridiculous contraption and breaking into song doesn’t even get a second glance from the denizens of Ponyville. Yeah, sounds about right.
Interesting that Apple Bloom is specifically described as having a “cowgirl accent.” For one, what’s this word you keep using, girl? For another, it’s interesting to see the accent of the founding family of Ponyville associated more with ranchers. (And there’s the question of bovine sapience in Equestria, but that’s another matter.)
Also, Berrow describes Apple Bloom as “light yellow-green with a bold pink mane” which feels a touch off the mark. Scootaloo using the term “hidden talent” also makes me raise an eyebrow. Yes, she doesn’t know what her destiny is yet, but once she determines it, it will hardly be hidden.
“Pinkie pulled three sets of mini spring-loaded shoes just like hers seemingly out of nowhere. It was almost like magic, but it wasn’t—it was just Pinkie. She was prepared for a good time, and nopony could blame her for that!”
Preparedness doesn’t let her violate space-time, Gillian. It’s absolutely magic. And why would anypony blame her for it in the magical land of Equestria?
Pinkie has deputized the Crusaders and given them moon shoes. This cannot possibly end well.
“Scootaloo couldn’t fly yet.” I appreciate this.
Apple Bloom wants to go somewhere new and different rather than her home… so Pinkie sends her to Golden Oaks and Fluttershy’s cottage. Yay? 
Chapter 3 is entitled “The Road Less Sparkled,” which conjures some very interesting mental images. Did that make all the difference?
Interesting that Cheerilee’s home is described as a house, whereas Sweetie Drops has a cottage. (Also unclear whether Pinkie casually knows Bonbon’s true identity or if that just hasn’t come up yet.) Also, Pinkie still hasn’t given up on getting Cranky to join in more social activities
Hmm. Garden gems. Precious crystals embedded in along the cobblestones, an import from the Crystal Empire. An interesting concept, and a definite sign of just how much of a misnomer “precious gems” is in Equestria, especially after the Empire’s return.
Pinkie literally shudders to imagine a Ponyville without her parties. Appropriate.
Just having a box of bungee cords doesn’t seem like it’ll work well for the “springy” theme of the party. And I’m not sure what a “bunny bed” even is. A rabbit-specific petting zoo?
… Ah. Close. Bunnies jumping on a mattress. Pinkie Logic at its finest.
Dash promises a trick that’s forty percent cooler than an earlier triple somersault, and I just sigh.
Pinkie has apparently gotten to know multiple barns, including the ones at both of her grandmothers’ farms. The one at Sweet Apple Acres is apparently the friendliest. And identifies as male. Well then.
“Her mane was puffed up to full height, which meant that Pinkie was very excited. Either that, or she’d just been jumping a lot. Or both.”
Okay, I do appreciate a good mathematician’s answer.
And Rarity would rather admire her own reflection in the lake rather than jump around and potentially ruin her coiffure. It works, but I really dislike Berrow’s approach with Rarity.
Ah, the bungee jumping station has been set up. That wasn’t clear.
Igneous Rock’s hat is explicitly described as a “pilgrim hat,” which raises a number of questions about pilgrimages in general and groups making transatlantic journeys to escape/practice persecution in particular.
And here’s the other canon contribution of this story: This is the first time we get the official names for Pinkie’s family, later confirmed in “Hearthbreakers.” Also the first intimation of Maud’s existence. (Ironically, given that the family needs to introduce themselves to Applejack in that episode, it raises the question of just what happened in the particulars of that timeline’s Ponypalooza.)
The odd thing is just how confused the other Pies are by these proceedings given how Pinkie got her cutie mark. Though it’s possible that her memory of that day may be a bit different than the reality.
Interesting that Pinkie Sense didn’t foretell the family’s appearance, and that Pinkie apparently expected it to. I suppose running in the family means the family can put countermeasures in place against it.
Pinkie’s parents being nonplussed at her having had a pet rock back home… Hmm. I could definitely see her informing her sisters, but not bringing hr parents into the loop. Or they just tuned her out. Whatever the case, this raises questions about what the rest of the family thinks of Boulder.
That said, given how Limestone is acting like a clone of Marble and Igneous’s Apple-esque accent, it’s clear that they hadn’t quite finalized The family’s characterization by the time this book came out.
Huh. The Pies came to see Twilight in an official, royal capacity. Unexpected, especially with Canterlot just a bit further along the rail network.
“Usuallly, when [Twilight] was at home in Ponyville, he preferred that everypony treat her like they did before she became a princess. None of this ‘Your Royal Highness’ mumbo jumbo that every other pony in Equestria insisted on.”
Manehattan apparently isn’t part of Equestria. The cab drivers certainly aren’t. 
I do appreciate Twilight getting a jab in on the other Pies dismissing Pinkie’s passions. (Though their dismissal still feels odd in and of itself.)
“‘It’s great news… because we are about to lose the rock farm.’ The crowd gasped, even though most of them hadn’t known the farm existed until then. It just seemed like the right response.”
Ponyville, ladies and gentlemen! Where the pony on the street is always happy to contribute to the appropriate dramatic tone.
Also, Fluttershy is concerned for all the little rocks, which is somewhere between farcical and entirely appropriate.
Pinkie is shocked by this news to the point not just of speechlessness, but of standing still. Rarity finds that second part very distressing. That she then cancels the ongoing party is even more so for all involved. It quickly becomes the main grist of the Ponyville rumor mill.
And Rarity is distracted from the Pies’ plight when she spots some emeralds around the Sweet Apple Acres flower beds. She’s a self-made businessmare, Berrow. She can read the room enough to keep aesthetic comments to herself. Usually.
Pinkie’s mood has been somewhat lifted by an Emergency Cupcake. And yes, that’s how the book puts it. She’d recently installed the cases in case of cupcake emergencies.
Twilight’s trying to emphasize how she’s not the only one who can help just because she’s an alicorn. A lesson she could take more to heart elsewhere.
Marble speaks. This is definitely before their characterization was pinned down.
Those gem accents from the Empire were foreshadowing the rock farm’s woes. Demand for inorganic produce that isn’t sparkly enough to hold a four-year-old’s attention has plummeted. Never mind stone’s use in construction, industry, and any other field that doesn’t need to look pretty. We need a child-comprehensible conflict, darn it!
Still, this is an interesting angle. The Empire’s return should cause ripples across the rest of Equestria. It’s a concept I haven’t really seen explored elsewhere.
Pinkie proposes a rock concert to raise rock farm awareness (and possibly charge admission,) which her father dismisses as ridiculous. And this works. It’s one thing to accept the odd daughter out’s talent. It’s quite another to appreciate that that seemingly frivolous talent has practical applications.
Hmm. Pinkie actually points out the discrepancy between now and getting her mark. Though back then, Igneous didn’t have to worry about his livelihood.
… And then Pinkie Pinkie Promises to never throw another party again. No one ever said she was good at proportionate responses. And we never hear any suggestions from anypony else on how to save the rock farm before cutting to the next morning. Such as, you know, the local princess chiming in to say that Pinkie’s plan can actually work quite well.
There is something downright disturbing about Pinkie tearing the inexplicably human nose off of a beagle puss, regardless of why. (In this case, it’s to complete her “I’m a serious, mature mare now” look.)
Hmm. Trying to plan a party without Pinkie. At least this time the others don’t have to worry about anyone declaring war on Equestria.
Ah. Twilight did voice her support for the concert off-camera. And because this iteration of the Pie family is obsequiously devoted to the crown, they agreed with the princess. A shame she didn’t tell them to apologize.
Trying to plan the party, then get Pinkie out of her self-loathing mindset feels like misaligned priorities.
Octavia knowing the bassist from Nine Inch Tails raises questions, as does Applejack being the one to offer that tidbit.
Ah. Believing that Pinkie is their best hope to save the farm is apparently too much for the Pies to swallow even when a mare with a tiara says it. (Spike being the designated Royal Tour Guide, that they’ll accept without blinking.)
“[Marble and Limestone] seemed to have an unspoken language that consisted mostly of blinks and nods.”
I get the feeling that every Pie sister can speak that one. Partly because of Marble, partly because excessive noise was frowned upon in that household, for a very limiting value of “excessive.”
I’m sure Celestia would be grateful that this Igneous has never been to Canterlot. This kind of slavish devotion to royalty must be exhausting for her.
… Ah. Igneous’s respose to change is to try to beat it back with the overwhelming force of an alicorn rather than do anything to acknowledge or adapt to it. Yeah, that tracks.
“Oh goody, goody rock hops!”
You know, this is probably meant to be an activity, but I can’t help but imagine the Pies brewing beer from rocks. If anypony could manage it, it’d be them.
Aaaand Pinkie’s family still doesn’t take her seriously enough listen to her, even with her attempts to please them and conform to their wishes. Naturally, this means she doubles down on that conformation. I’m so glad this isn’t how they were actually portrayed in the show.
I do appreciate how even when she’s trying to be Pinkamena Serious Pie, Pinkie still casually teleports behind her friends for the sake of a punchline. I have less appreciation for Pinkie Pie having more focus than Rarity.
“Pinkie was using all of her Pinkie Power not to explode into some sort of party monster right there.”
One could read that in a number of ways.
Okay, mildly more focus than Rarity. Between her friends trying to force Pinkie into taking over the planning by deliberately doing it wrong and her own talent, PInkie is, quote, “starting to forget the reason” why she’d given up parties.
I’m not sure what Pinkie was planning between growing cucumbers and organizing a “rock circus,” and I’m frankly afraid to find out.
Only for Pinkie Pie could a surprise party be an intervention. And vice versa.
So, let’s review: Pinkie’s family didn’t think she would understand their concern about losing the farm because of her perennial optimism. Because, you know, it’s not like she was deeply depressed before the Rainboom or anything. Moreover, they only saw their mistake by watching the library and seeing her struggle to repress her partying impulses… but that raises the question of how. Based on the narration, there is zero visual indication of Pinkie’s struggle as she approaches Golden Oaks. The only conclusion I can come to is that Cloudy Quartz, as many mothers claim, can literally read her children’s minds.
Pinkie is compared to “a pinball in an arcade machine,” and yeah, that tracks. Pinball machines aren’t just easily feasible with an Equestrian tech base, flipper controls work a lot better with hooves than whatever Button Mash was playing.
I’m not sure what surprises me more about Davenport, that he does custom printing or that Pinkie uses him as a source of tiny parachutes.
Asking Fluttershy to contact Photo Finish doesn’t seem like it will end well. Also, Photo has more connections in the Equestrian music community than I thought.
“I want every musician we know up on that stage—Octavia! Lyra Heartstrings! Lyrica Lilac! Neigh-Z! Don’t worry, though. I also have some secret connections if those ponies fall through!”
I have a number of questions. (The fact that I headcanon Lyrica as Lyra’s mother does not help.)
Moral of the story: Never doubt Pinkie’s PR proficiency. Darn near all of Equestria attends. Certainly more than Ponyville has room for. I do not envy the cleanup crew.
More performers for the list: Coldhay, the Whooves, and John Mare. I can’t really complain—goodness knows I’ve done worse—but it still feels more than faintly ridiculous.
Nice to see that the Pies have a rich tradition of baking. Equestrian nominative determinism would suggest as much.
Vinyl is, once again, referred to solely by her stage name. The fact that the Transformers crossover actually calls her Vinyl Scratch is still kind of amazing.
Coldhay apparently got their start in Canterlot. Unexpected; you’d think it’d be Trottingham.
“Igneous and Cloudy were taking orders for front path stones, cottage bricks, and even pet rocks!”
Yeah, that second one underscores the point. The new hotness couldn’t and shouldn’t have taken away all of the farm’s demand. Still, you can’t argue with results.
This one was definitely interesting, especially with the benefit of hindsight. This sort of thing just wouldn’t track well with Pinkie’s family as we know them in the show. Limestone in particular would not be taking this sort of thing well. I’d half-expect her to march straight to Cadence’s throne to air her grievances.
In all, this was fun but rushed. Of course, I should expect this sort of breakneck pace when Pinkie’s involved. Let’s see what I can do with it all.
Social Networking 1W
Sorcery
Search your library for a legendary card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.
Pinkie’s connections stretch far beyond Ponyville, Equestria, or the known Multiverse.
Utter Disdain 1W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
You and permanents you control have protection from enchanted creature’s name. (None of you can be blocked, targeted, or dealt damage by anything with that name.)
The Pies didn’t hate Pinkie. They just didn’t respect her.
Ponypalooza Roadie 2W
Creature — Pony Bard
Whenever Ponypalooza Roadie or another Bard enters the battlefield under your control, proliferate. (Choose any number of permanents and/or players, then give each another counter of each kind already there.)
“You’re on in three!”
3/2
Plummeting Demand 1U
Instant
Counter target spell unless its controller pays 1 for each nonland permanent they control.
As the Crystal Empire’s products made their way into the marketplace, more mundane materials fell by the wayside.
Canny Barnspeaker 2U
Creature — Pony Wizard
Ward 2
When Canny Barnspeaker enters the battlefield, target artifact or land you control becomes a 4/4 creature in addition to its other types for as long as Canny Barnspeaker remains on the battlefield.
1/2
Overbounce 2U
Instant
Return target nonland permanent to its owner’s hand.
Landfall — If a land entered the battlefield under your control this turn, you may put that permanent on top of its owner’s library instead.
Sometimes a pony throws herself out of town.
Court Sycophant 2B
Creature — Pony Advisor
When Court Sycophant enters the battlefield, you become the monarch.
Whenever a player becomes the monarch, that player gains control of Court Sycophant.
“Yes, Your Highness. Of course, Your Highness.”
3/3
Uninvited Guest 4B
Creature — Horror
Lifelink
Whenever an opponent gains life, you may cast Uninvited Guest from your graveyard.
“Oh well. The more, the merrier!”
—Pinkie PIe, Bearer of Laughter
4/3
Basalt Blanket 1R
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +0/+1 for each Mountain you control.
2R: Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn for each Mountain you control.
Rock farms offer little comfort.
Dour Rock Farmer 1R
Creature — Pony Citizen
Players can’t gain life.
Rock farmers are traditionally reserved, keeping their passions to themselves. As with all of their traditions, Pinkie Pie turns that on its head.
2/2
Expressway Overhauler 1R
Creature — Pony Pilot
Whenever one or more creatures you control crew a Vehicle, that Vehicle gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is those creatures’ total power minus that Vehicle’s points of crew.
The Friendship Express worked double-time to get ponies to the concert.
2/1
Glitter Seeker 2R
Creature — Unicorn Rogue
Haste
Whenever an artifact enters the battlefield, that artifact’s controller gains control of Glitter Seeker.
“Oh, that’s gorgeous! Let me just make sure you’re using it properly.”
3/2
Devastating Loss 2RR
Sorcery
Destroy target artifact or land. Creatures that permanent’s controller controls can’t block this turn.
Even the idea of losing the rock farm was enough to make Pinkie sit still for almost a minute.
Vernal Splendor 1GG
Sorcery
Untap all lands you control.
Awaken 3—4GG (If you cast this spell for 4GG, also put three +1/+1 counters on target land you control and it becomes a 0/0 Elemental creature with haste. It’s still a land.)
Bunny Bed 2G
Enchantment
Whenever a nontoken creature enters the battlefield under your control, create a 1/1 green Rabbit creature token.
“You don’t need to summon them. They show up on their own.”
—Fluttershy, Bearer of Kindness
Pinkie’s Recruits 2G
Creature — Pony Scout
Riot (This creature enters the battlefield with your choice of a +1/+1 counter or haste.)
Whenever Pinkie’s Recruits deals combat damage to a player, look at that many cards from the top of your library. You may reveal a creature card from among them and put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.
2/1
Super Spring Sneakers 2
Artifact — Equipment
As long as it’s your turn, equipped creature has flying, hexproof, and haste.
Equip 1
Pinkie’s creations shouldn’t work as well as they do. Of course, they shouldn’t exist in the first place.
Imperial Crystal 3
Artifact
T: Add W, U, or B.
Cycling 2 (2, Discard this card: Draw a card.)
The raw stuff of the Empire resonates with the whole emotional spectrum.
Silica Psychic BG
Creature — Pony Druid
When Silica Psychic enters the battlefield, target player mills X cards, where X is the number of nonbasic lands that player controls.
“Crystal ball? Don’t insult me.”
2/2
Cancel Festivities WUU
Instant
Counter target spell. That spell’s controller skips their next combat phase.
The other Bearers knew it was serious when Pinkie ended a party early.
Reflexive Snapjaw 1RG
Creature — Crocodile
Whenever another creature enters the battlefield, Reflexive Snapjaw fights that creature.
It bites the hoof that feeds it, and anything else that gets in reach.
4/4
Disproportionate Response 2UR
Instant
Choose one —
• Counter target artifact spell. Destroy all artifacts with mana value 2 or less that spell’s controller controls.
• Counter target creature spell. Disproportionate Response deals 2 damage to each creature that spell’s controller controls.
Ponypalooza 3GW
Legendary Enchantment — Song
When Ponypalooza enters the battlefield or at the beginning of your upkeep, put a verse counter on Ponypalooza, then create a 1/1 white Pony creature token for each verse counter on it.
4GW, Sacrifice Ponypalooza: Creature you control get +X/+X and gain indestructible and vigilance until your next turn, where X is the number of verse counters on Ponypalooza
Gemstrewn Path
Land
T; Add C.
3, T: Create a Treasure token. (It’s an artifact with “T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.”)
All of Equestria soon embraced the Crystal Empire’s landscaping techniques.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: You still have to pay full price for Uninvited Guest, because the ability doesn't say otherwise. Yes, this is allowed.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: If the target of Cancel Festivities becomes illegal, its entire effect fails. The target's controller's creatures will be allowed to punch you in the face for trying it.
Now I want to see the scene of canon Limestone marching into Cadance's throne room to chew her out for this, and the guards growing horror as everything they try to do to get the loud, offensive mare out fails and they finally realize it's a Pie Sister they are dealing with, and thus hopeless.
5599476
Love it.
(Guards bodily pick up Limestone and toss her out of the throne room. She rants about stupid consumers and worthless lumps of minerals the whole time.)
Limestone, from directly behind them and before Cadence: And another thing!
Guard A to Guard B: Oh schist, it's one of those Pies.
5599468
Stupid Complicated Game Corollary: You can still use Cancel Festivities on a spell that can't be countered. it will resolve, but the next round of facepunching will still be skipped.
I remember quite clearly Fluttershy using the word "girls" to refer to the CMC in "The Stare Master". I'm fairly certain it has popped up in other places, too. (For instance, I think Twilight has used it to collectively address her friends.)
Merely imagery used for the benefit of human readers. It's not as if they would recognize the name of a very uptight and un-fun group of historical ponies who wore very similar headgear, after all.
It's like the people of Springfield and their willingness to take part in angry mobs.
Remember mechanical arcade machines? I do. I recall one where the player was represented by an image of an airplane projected onto a scrolling, painted background. (Then again, I'm pretty old by the standards of most pony fans.)
5599482
I think the show cut down on it after the first season, but "girls" remained a part of the Ponish language. Here are examples from season five, season seven, and season nine. The word "boys" made it in, too.
Pinkie doesn't just go to the madness place. She is a madness place. Just one that's relatively benign.
Apple trees do best when they have a moderately cold winter, so I'm sure Big Apple has something to do with it.
Or similar to Spring-Heeled Jack's, if you want to veer off towards Cupcakes territory.
Pinkie and unreliable narrator? Say it ain't so!
Given that we see a male "alicorn" in the background of that episode, I assume that fake horns are a not uncommon fashion accessory in Manehattan. And, given the cab driver's reaction, probably a symptom of Karenitis.