[Iteration] Preview · 3:49am May 23rd, 2021
I had a great idea for a contest entry. Two contests, actually. It was going to be a really cool stunt, writing a fic that was simultaneously applicable to the Friendship is Optimal and Nailah's Shipping Contest, and submitting to both.
But the deadline to one has long passed, and the other's is coming up soon. I learned my lesson from last time. The idea is more important than any contest, and I will be letting this one take the time and space it needs. Prereads, multiple drafts, and craft. The length alone would disqualify it for even Nailah's contest (though not by much), and honestly, I am a bit relieved. No pressure to stay up until 3AM desperately finishing a draft before submitting to meet a deadline.
Of course, this means I will not be publishing anything for a while, sadly. And with wanting to get the Long-Distance rewrite up before publishing this, I'm probably looking at late June at the earliest. I am very slow at writing!
So until then, here's a preview, my first draft of the first chapter. In a million years or however long it takes me to get this done, you will see the version of this that's been through the editing process.
Rectangles. Was that what their society revolved around, on the other side of that portal? Humming ones, buzzing ones, ones with clacking buttons too small for any hoof to press, ones with fans inside that blew unpleasantly stale, warm air into his face as he passed by them. But the glowing ones were the worst of all. It wasn’t the warm, honest glow of unicorn magic or zebra potionry or cutie mark biology, but rather this unpleasant, sick parody of it. A soulless glow that sapped the vitality and color of everything it touched.
Sunburst frowned as he saw how pallid the purple unicorn’s face looked, awash in that glow. Entranced by it. Snared in it. So much so that he did not even look up at Sunburst as he approached.
“Micro? Hey, it’s me. Sunburst.”
The clacking stopped as Micro Chips turned his face away from the glow of the rectangle in front of him to face Sunburst, who could see even more clearly just how tired and bleary and red those eyes looked. Eyes that seemed to take a moment to recognize him before brightening, oh so slightly.
“Oh, hey, Sunburst! I’m so glad you’re here! You got my letter?”
“Yes, I did. It made me worried.” Sunburst glanced around the small apartment, made all the more cramped by the rectangles and nests of cables, then further still by the trash and mess strewn all over the floor and furniture. “To be honest, so does this.” When Sunburst looked back at Micro Chips, he was already back to not looking at him.
“I’m sorry I’ve been making you worry. I’ve just been so busy with this thing! I’m so close.”
“Micro…” Sunburst could have sworn he had heard those exact sentences the last worried visit, and the time before that as well.
“It’s all connected, don’t you see? The Crystal Heart, the portal, the other world, our world! All of it! And I thought that nopony could see I like I could! That nopony else even tried to figure out what makes their world so different from ours. It’s not just a world without magic, Sunburst! They have magic, too! It’s just different from ours. So different we can’t understand it, we can’t even see it with the way we look at the world! But I wasn’t alone, Sunburst. That’s what I figured out. I wasn’t the only one to see it. She saw it, too. How could I have been so stupid to not make the connection? But we all were, weren’t we? We thought that the portal just worked, that it was just a door you go in and out of, but it’s so much more than that!“
Sunburst grimaced. Micro Chips was not looking at him, but rather the space between them, filling it with the manic energy in his eyes. It was so much worse than last time.
“Micro.” Sunburst sighed. “Micro, I’m worried about you. When’s the last time you left the apartment? Or talked to anypony? Or cleaned?“
Micro Chips blinked, seeming to come into his senses for a moment. “Oh, right! I know.” He glanced around the clutter and filth of the room, as if seeing it for the first time in ages. He frowned. “I know this looks bad, Sunburst. But if you understood just how important what I’m trying to do is, you’d understand! Really! I’m so close to solving it, Sunburst! Can you imagine what we could do with their magic and ours combined? We could fix everything! But I just need this one thing, Sunburst. I just need to figure out one more thing. And I need your help.”
Sunburst frowned at this, and glanced at the mess of cables on the table in front of Micro Chips. Snaking out from the big rectangle on the floor next to his hooves, each ending in a shard of the Crystal Heart. Micro Chips followed his glance, and frowned guiltily.
“I know, I know. You’ve done so much for me already. I couldn’t have gotten this far without you. But I really only need one more thing, Sunburst. Just one more thing and everything will be great. And I won’t ask for anything from you ever again, Sunburst. I just need this one thing. I promise.”
“Micro…”
“Please, Sunburst. You remember what it was like when we met, right? How it seemed like we were both stuck? Trying to figure out what our lives were meant for, and how to prove ourselves? And look at you now! You found it! You found what you were good at, and you showed everyone.“ Sunburst touched the crystaller’s pendant around his neck with a hoof. “And all this.” Micro Chips gestured with a hoof at all the rectangles around him. “It’s what I’m good at. Something I didn’t even know existed until a few years ago, but means so much to me now. It’s what I was meant to do, Sunburst. But I can’t…” Micro Chips laughed bitterly. “I can’t convince anyone else how useful and important this stuff is. Not without making something really special. And I was so close to having everything I need, Sunburst. I just need this one more thing. Please.“
Sunburst closed his eyes and sighed. Micro Chips really wasn’t asking for much. Just for him to use his privileges in the Crystal Archives. But would that be enabling him? Would it make any difference if he refused? Or maybe…
“Okay, I’ll do it. But only if you do something for me first.“
“Oh, anything, Sunburst! Really!”
Sunburst did his best to ignore the bright desperation in his voice. “I want us to take that trip we were planning.”
Micro Chips looked at him in confusion. Sunburst continued. “The one we talked about two years ago, remember? The week-long hiking trip up to Neighagra Falls?” Had it really been that long already? Since his friend had been normal? Sunburst tried not to think too hard about that.
Micro Chips blinked, and gulped. “A-a week? Away?”
“Yes. Away. From all this.” Sunburst gestured with a hoof at all the rectangles around him. “I think it will be good for you.”
“Yeah, okay…” He then fixed Sunburst with his gaze, the hesitance in his voice melting away. “No, wait, yeah! It’s totally okay. A week away sounds great. Definitely.“
Sunburst smiled with relief. Sure, this was transactional, but maybe it was the best way to go about things. Forced away from this obsession of his, Sunburst was sure Micro Chips would find his old self back pretty quick. Besides, he truly didn’t want his friend to stop this project he clearly found so much meaning in. He didn’t want to see him go back to the way he was before, constantly miserable, barely scraping by at his Ministry of Energy desk job. Before those rectangles entered his life. No. He just wanted to see him a bit more balanced about it.
A week in nature would help, definitely. Something well worth what that rambling letter was asking of him. Certainly not as dangerous or risky as getting the Crystal Heart shards had been. How could any bit of information be?
“So, what is it that you needed from the Archive?”
“Just everything you can find about her.” Micro Chips seemed to take a second to register Sunburst’s blank look in response. He laughed. “Oh, right, sorry. I mean, I need everything you can find about this one filly who disappeared from Canterlot about fifteen years ago. Her name is Sunset Shimmer.“
In accordance with my usual practice, for spoiler avoidance and such, I've not read the preview (Though if you think I really should anyway, please let me know!). I am intrigued, though, and look forward to the story (I mean, if I wasn't looking forward to the story so much, I'd have been more likely to read the preview now! :)), whenever you find it best to release it. :)
Good luck with the writing!
That's a very intriguing preview, not to mention somewhat ominous!
Keep on writing, this looks good.
Oh, this is right up my alley. Looking forward to seeing the end result.
Ominous indeeeeed sign me up for prereading i'm desperate for this quality content
The rules of rarity.mp3
With tiiiiiiiiiiiiime loove and couture !
5523560
Very understandable! I actually only wrote a preview because I felt weird about not posting a story in a long while.
5523569
I'm glad to hear it is intriguing, since it'll be the first thing a reader sees.
5523576
And I am looking forward to getting the ideas I had out there, it is a struggle for me to not just post this bit as Chapter 1 and write this as a serial starting now
5523696
I will sign you up for prereading no worries
5523819
thx fam
Neat idea!
5523819
Ah, righto; thanks. :)