In Which I Beg for Sweet Release From Breaking Dawn: Chapter 38 -- Power · 12:35pm Jul 29th, 2018
As the Volturi talk, Bella keeps her shield up. Jane and Alec attempt to incapacitate the Cullens and their allies, to keep them from running away, but it’s to no avail against Bella’s shield. When the Volturi break off, Aro says that, regardless of the decision, it doesn’t need to come to violence and it would be a shame for anyone to die. This prompts exclamations of disbelief from the Cullens’ side. I’d just like to remind you all one more time that the only evidence of the Volturi wanting to kill everyone here is either circumstantial and/or comes from the Cullens’ paranoia. The Volturi vote; Caius wants to kill Nessie, viewing her as an unknown and a risk, while Marcus thinks Nessie is safe for now and should be allowed to live. This leaves Aro to cast the deciding vote.
You know what? I think Aro would vote to let Nessie live.
He’s always been more than reasonable. He let Bella live when she knew the secrets of vampires. He’s listened to every single one of Carlisle’s witnesses who would speak. He didn’t go “fuck it” and kill everyone to avoid taking chances. His only reactions to Nessie have been joy and wonder. He would let her live.
But before Aro can vote, Edward suddenly cheers and asks Aro for a quick clarification: since the main problem is an inability to know how Nessie would develop, if it were proven that she would be safe, then there would be no need to vote and everyone could depart peaceably. Aro says that is indeed the case, but Nessie is unique.
“Not absolutely unique,” Edward disagreed. “Rare, certainly. But not one of a kind.”
Well. Isn’t that convenient.
Then Alice danced into the clearing from the southwest, and I felt like the bliss of seeing her face again might knock me off my feet.
CM + 1
Alice has returned from the Amazon with several vampires and another half-vampire, Nahuel. Nahuel was born a hundred and fifty years ago from the union of a vampire male and a human female, but his father left before he was born and his mother didn’t live; other vampires found him and cared for him. Nahuel reached maturity at about seven years old and hasn’t aged since then. Well. Isn’t that conve-
I felt a shudder tremble through Jacob’s body.
…What’s he thinki- SHE’LL BE SEVEN, YOU PEDO! MOTHERFUCKER! CM + 1
Upon hearing Nahuel’s testimony, Aro votes to let Nessie live. He tells Carlisle that there are no hard feelings, he was just doing a job. And then they leave quietly.
…How fucking anticlimactic. All this buildup, all this terror about how they’ll twist the rules to their own ends, all this brave grandstanding for “freedom”, all this resolve of characters standing by the Cullens, and then the Volturi pop in, learn that mistakes were made and there’s no problem, and then pop out without putting up a fight. You know, Redwall — a children’s book — had a giant battle scene that culminated with the hero dropping a giant bell on the villain. This has spirited debat- It’s not spirited. It’s stoic and padded.
“Is it really over?” I whispered to Edward.
His smile was huge. “Yes. They’ve given up. Like all bullies, they’re cowards underneath the swagger.” He chuckled.
No. They got information that changed the situation and realized there was no cause for alarm.
We had forever. And Nessie was going to be fine and healthy and strong. Like the half-human Nahuel, in a hundred and fifty years she would still be young. And we would all be together.
Happiness expanded like an explosion inside me — so extreme, so violent that I wasn’t sure I’d survive it.
I could speak anymore. I lifted my head and kissed him with a passion that might possibly set the forest on fire.
CM + 2
Yes, that’s really it. But there’s only one chapter left, and then I’m done!
Clinginess Meter: 65 x 6
Chapters Left: 1
Wanna know how much of an anticlimax this was? In the film, Alice shows Aro a vision of the battle that would ensue if he attempted to kill Nessie. We see the vision, and it’s big and elaborate and actually kind of kickass:
And if that doesn’t make up for how horrifically boring this was or the deus ex machina of Nahuel, one last spat of trivia just because I can:
- English rock band Royal Blood only has two members: vocalist/bassist Mike Kerr and drummer/backup vocalist Ben Thatcher. They don’t use studio musicians, either when recording or when on tour. All of their “guitar” parts are actually bass, which is impressive when their songs sound like this.
- Tom Hanks is a descendant of Abraham Lincoln on his mother’s side.
- The directors of John Wick were star Keanu Reeves’s stunt doubles during The Matrix. For this film, Reeves did the majority of his own stunts and fight scenes in spite of being almost fifty years old.
- James Woods loved his role as Hades in Disney’s Hercules so much he’s said he’ll take the role again whenever it’s offered, no questions asked, even if he has to take a pay cut.
- When the US invaded Panama in 1989 to depose dictator Manuel Noriega, he tried to take shelter in the Holy See’s embassy. Since the US couldn’t invade, they employed psychological warfare, playing rock music at deafening levels to try to drive him out. Songs played included “Welcome to the Jungle”, “Run Like Hell”, “I Fought the Law”, “Danger Zone”, “You’ve Got Another Thing Comin’”, “Nowhere to Run”, “(Don’t Fear) The Reaper”, “Run to the Hills”, and, of course, “Panama”. This was Operation Nifty Package.
- According to an urban legend, Neil Armstrong said, “Good luck, Mr. Gorsky” as he entered the Apollo 11 lunar module to leave the moon. Supposedly, he was playing baseball with friends and the ball landed in the yard of his next-door neighbors, the Gorsky. When he went to retrieve it, he heard Mrs. Gorsky yelling, “You want oral sex? You’ll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!”
- Each of the first five Mission: Impossible movies has a different director: Brian De Palma for the first one, John Woo for II, J. J. Abrams for III (in his cinematic directorial debut), Brad Bird for Ghost Protocol (in his live-action debut), and Christopher McQuarrie for Rogue Nation. McQuarrie would return for Fallout, but Tom Cruise told him to switch up his directing style.
- Part of the reason the Library of Alexandria was so large was because, when ships landed in Alexandria carrying books, the books were seized, copied, and placed in the Library. The original owners got the copies.
- Residents of New Mexico who are both not dependent on others for living and over one hundred years old are tax-exempt.
- Airplane! is a remake of an earlier disaster movie, Zero Hour!. Not “technically” a remake; the producers for Airplane! acquired the rights and lots of scenes have the same dialogue, word-for-word. The only real difference is that Zero Hour! is Airplane! with the jokes removed.
- Archie and the Punisher once had a crossover event together. Yes, really. It’s called Archie Meets the Punisher. Google it. Seriously. Later on, we’d have Archie vs. Predator. I wish I could make that up.
- Technically speaking, Vatican City has the highest crime rate in the world. It has a miniscule population while at the same time attracting an immense amount of crowds, leading to plenty of foreigners pickpocketing tourists within its borders. In 1992, on average, every citizen of the Vatican committed at least two civil and/or criminal offenses.
Okay, but how many crimes is that per Pope? :V
Man. MovieBob said that fight scene was awesome, and he wasn't kidding. Who'd expect a fucking vampires vs. vampires-and-werewolves brawl in a fucking Twilight movie? That one guy ripped that dude's whole body off! (Apparently, vampire necks are made of balsa wood.) And making the whole thing just be the vision is a great film technique.
But my god, the moments leading up to and after it are just so much dull surprise, because nothing can be amazing for long.
I actually knew about the Punisher one already. The Predator crossover, though, is news to me. So does that mean that the Predators exist in the Marvel universe? And, by extension, so do Xenomorphs.
I knew about the Punisher, but Archie vs. Predator is news to me. I can't think that Riverdale offered much in the way of worthy prey.
Also, this entire book was pointless. Though I think prolonged exposure to Nessie may cause paranoia.
One chapter remaning.
You know, I like reading these blogs.
Archie Comics actually had a whole super-serious super-hero thing going for a while, actually.