In Which I Tolerate Eclipse: Chapter 21 -- Trails · 11:05am Jun 4th, 2018

It’s morning, and Bella’s packing for the trip to the middle of nowhere. There’s a cold storm coming, so she needs to pack warm clothes. She calls Jacob to tell him she’s ready, but Billy answers instead. He promises to pass the message along and wishes he could be out there with the wolves.

The urge to fight must be a defining characteristic of the Y chromosome. They were all the same.

This kind of stupidity definitely isn’t characteristic of a synergistic effect of two X chromosomes; it’s just Bella.

Alice pulls Bella aside; of course she’s seen Bella decide to get married. She wants to run the wedding and basically guilt-trips Bella into accepting. Yes, Alice is discount Pinkie Pie: on a good day, she’s great, but on a bad day, she’s terrible.

They head out to the clearing. Bella leaves a false trail in the area, getting her scent on everything, and that sounds dirtier than I meant it to be. Because of the nature of the plan, Edward can’t be close to her, to ensure the scent is as strong as possible.

It was gloomy under the trees, and I wished I could walk closer to Edward and hold his hand.

CM + 1

In the process, Bella trips and cuts her hand. After she smears some blood around to strengthen the trail, Edward cleans and bandages the cut. He says he got over Bella’s scent while thinking she was dead because it was so painful.

“But… having experienced the way it feels to think I’ve lost you… my reactions have changed. My entire being shies away from any course that could inspire that kind of pain again.”

Well, that was easy.

Jacob arrives and carries Bella through the forest, separating from Edward. Jacob talks about how Bella hasn’t been down to La Push recently, but Bella says she’s still angry about him kissing her.

“Does that mean that he’s a better kisser that (sic) I am?” Jacob asked, suddenly glum.
“I really couldn’t say, Jake. Edward is the only person I’ve ever kissed.”
“Besides me.”
“But I don’t count that as a kiss, Jacob. I think of it more as an assault.”
“Ouch! That’s cold.”

Holy shit, Bella’s the sane one in this situation!

Jacob goes into his entitled personality, basically saying, “Hey. I know you’ve got a boyfriend and you love him, but try me! I’m loads better.” He keeps going on about how Bella totally loves him, so he should be her girlfriend, not Edward. It’s not that direct, but the implication is blatant. Bella lets slip that she talked Edward into staying with her during the fight; Jacob immediately says that he’ll stay with her, too, acting as a “cell phone” instead of Seth.

The conversation slips into werewolf hierarchy. Apparently, Jacob’s the second in command of the pack, the beta wolf to Sam’s alpha. It’s partially based on lineage, and since Jacob’s great-grandfather was the last alpha, Jacob should technically be the alpha now. However, he didn’t want to step up and take the role from Sam; he never wanted to be a werewolf and he compares it to getting drafted into a war he never knew existed. You know, why couldn’t we have conversations about that instead of who Bella wants to be her boyfriend?

They reach the camp without further incident. Edward’s already there and has set the tent up in preparation for the coming storm.

Clinginess Meter: 34

Twenty-two pages. Twenty-two pages. I’m a broken record complaining about pacing. You know, I think I’ve found a way to immediately improve the story and speed it up: remove Jacob from the love triangle. He can still be a character in the book, but as long as he and Edward aren’t competing for Bella’s affections, we won’t get any parts where they have to bicker with each other over who’s better-suited for her. Heck, maybe Jacob stays in love with her, realizes she’s happy and with Edward, and decides to just let her go. Easy. It’s how I’d do it.

Well, not quite. I wouldn’t have the romance at all. I’d have more vampire fights.

Previous | Table of Contents | Next

Report Rambling Writer · 355 views · #eclipse #why #learning experience

Comments ( 3 )