I hate being paranoid.

*Hears a single faint noise outside*

*FUCKING BOOK IT TO THE KITCHEN GRAB THE BIGGEST KNIFE YOU SEE HOLY SHIT.*

Me the rest of the night:

*Hears the sound again*

What the hell is wrong with me.

Comments

[Zephyr]

Halloween is too close I guess.

[Ice]

I know how you feel, first time I saw jeff the killer I wouldn't have been surprised to find my bed covered in explosives.

[Discount Irish]

I love being paranoid, keeps me on my toes, and makes it to where everything isnt always boring

[k12314]

452552
No, this is me EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT. I'M EVER HOME ALONE.

[Loki]

Spread those around your room, should give you some peace I hope!

[Diabolic Gnome]

In dark and the dim__Sleep with one eye from now on__We watch from the dark

[Suke]

Hey, I had a guy walk in my house while I was in the kitchen, and use my toilet upstairs. When I go to the loo he's just flushing, and I know my Dad's on holiday in the Land Down Under. Luckily, I have a metal rod at hand upstairs for getting into the attic. I stood with it as he came out, and said, "Would you please leave before I beat you with this?"
He ran, I locked my door (about 2 PM) and sit with metal rod for rest of the day/night, it being by my bed for the next few days. And that's only my reason for paranoia at home. I have ENEMIES around my town. WITH KNIVES!

[Plotbuster]

Home alone. Turn on all lights. Close all doors and windows so I can hear if any of them open. Sit down at computer to read some pony, with soft music going. Getting into a story. Something brushes my leg. Scream like a little filly and flip out.

Find myself on the floor tangled up in my chair, clutching my chest and breathing like a race horse.

"Meow."

FUCKING CAT GOD DAMMIT!!!

[k12314]

452574
Literally every person in my town hates me or wants me dead. I've had attempts on my life made NUMEROUS times, a few of them I just barely came out of alive. I've been chased by cars, threatened with knives, threatened with a GUN, etc.

I shouldn't be alive, but I am. Because fuck you world I do what I want.

[nonameguy0010]

You have to go to the kitchen for your protection weapon? Lol.

*lifts up pillow and grabs Ka-Bar*
All I ever need is always an arm-length away.

[Sky Cloud]

452558 I agree

[Ceraph]

Pfft, you humans and your weapons

I just turned my body into one. Guns are the only thing that make me think. Note, I said think. Not even think twice.

Also, being paranoid and aware and looking like your not is the trick to getting the jump on people who are trying to get the jump on you.

But being paranoid is a good thing, stops Murphy's law from kickin' in. Th day you simmer down, is the day you get screwed over.

How are your weeding plands going? Hope everything is coming together nicely for you and your Waifu-to-be.

[Ceraph]

452589

Also, why do they want you dead?

I thought this only happened to young people in mexico.

[Zephyr]

452560
Dude, you should be on skype. :/

[Suke]

452589 I'd say thank god for british gun laws, but i live in the country, and farmers can still get guns.

[Diabolic Gnome]

452589 What did you do to piss them off so badly?

[Big-X]

452560 oh man, I think I've felt that before
damn, not fun, most of the time...

[Raven Smite]

This is why I have two swords, a bokken, a pair of nunchaku, a bat, a club, a serrated dagger, and two guns within reach, in my room, at all times...

[Dleifragcat]

GRAB THE NEAREST MELEE WEAPON AND RANGE IT!

Oh but seriously one time during camp, I saw a bear looking through the window. I looked at it, it looked at me, a connection was formed.
It left and then after a short while there was a bump coming from the ceiling. It was a racoon.
But originally I swear I thought it was the bear trying to go down the chimney

Also a bunch of people I know are dressing up as Slenderman for halloween.... should be good

[Mard93]

Man, if you are like that from a faint noise, you would had hated if you were in my shoes when we were at war against the trolls (see my bio, { its on a blog} else you'd think I'm insane), they aren't know to be silent. Strangely enough, I slept like a baby

[fearanger]

Dude, I'm megaparanoid! My fear of arachnids and the dark plus my paranoia makes me check my bedroom walls every day for creepy-crawly spiders (they have a habit with playing peek-a-boo.) and I keep thinking some disturbing thing or Assassin (not just from Assassin's Creed) is going to jump out of the shadows and rip me to shreds!

[Krenshaw]

452589 Lill' tip, keep a high-caliber hunting rifle under your bed fully loaded. It has saved me numerous times... I STILL wonder how that wolf got into my house.

[Sonicbrony66]

It's not paranoia if they're really out to get you.

[Evocator]

This is why i keep my police taser on me at all times, as well as a handgun...
and my dads shotty inside my cabinet
i once had a homeless guy come in my house with a knife, and told me to get out, so i arrested him
let it be known that you should never do that, because the next day graffiti was ALL OVER MY HOUSE

[InarJollyhound]

Things are much safer on the pony sides of the interwebs! Live Long and Prosper!

[EvilEnchantress]

so it's not just me I have a butcher's knife ( idk why though) possibly because we have coyotes that aren't the brightest and guns are pretty much illegal in california

[Bajskorv123]

452589 WTF..? Now you must be kidding. A GUN??
I love it much more here on the safe brony side ;__;

Wtf... Just wtf...

[ShiroExia]

452589 stop lying :/ there is no way every person in a small town can hate 1 teen who only writes and shit, meaby if you go around being a rainbow dash and bein the biggest pest ever, yea i would believe it.

[Pinkies Imagination]

not even funny:, rainbowhuh: not EVEN FUCKING FUNNY! AT ALL! NOT EVEN AT ALL! 0% FUNNY! ... TROLLESTIA WOULD EVEN BE SCARED RIGHT NOW FOR ME!

Everything, EVERYTHING that I just read on that blog post, happened as I read it, knife and all. The second noise didn't happen, but the moment I read it on this post, BAM it happens....

(*me* Scared shitless)