Knowing exactly where I lost it isn't much of a consolation · 7:05pm Jan 7th, 2018
*sigh*
I'm trying to tell myself that it could have been worse. I'd spent the majority of the balance on that gift card. There was an appreciable -- useful -- if I go into details, I'm going to start depressing myself again -- amount left on it. But at least it was down to 20% or so. Better than still having the full value present when it was lost.
I've been reminding myself that not having the number written down doesn't matter. You can't shut down a gift card: whoever's holding it is the owner. I could, with the proper information, log into my account, tell the issuing party what had occurred, and get a response of "That's nice, but it's still your fault."
I know I took the proper steps after realizing it was missing. I mentally backtracked, figured out there was but a single place where it could have dropped out, and physically beelined for it. I checked in and under. Nothing. So someone came by shortly after the fall and picked it up. These things happen. I've been on the receiving end when they've happened to other people. Admittedly, most of what I've found has been empty, but... there's been a few times when I've found a gift card with a degree of balance remaining, and other than turning it in to the nearest Lost & Found, I couldn't try to return it to the owner because gift card. (There isn't always a Lost & Found.) So in that sense, there's an argument to be made that my luck did no more than even out.
I'm trying not to kick myself, because there's no practical purpose to it. That won't bring the card back. I should be thinking of practical measures to keep this from happening a second time. Hole punch and chain feels like overkill.
I am not tearing my residence apart, because there's no point. I know where it dropped out. Going through everything, everywhere, is no more than self-delusion directed into the idiocy of false hope, with the possible achievement of some incidental cleaning.
I've been reminding myself that this isn't a crisis. I can live without that amount. This is not a Patreon/Kofi request. If I get into that degree of trouble, I'll let someone know. The scratch bleeds, but no stitches are required.
But I'm frustrated. Angry with myself. I hate losing things. I hardly ever drop money, or money equivalents. It's just the helplessness of knowing what went wrong and that there's nothing I can do about it. I feel stupid when things fall away...
*sigh*
It could have been worse. I know that. It'll take at least a night's sleep before I start to believe it.
So I'm not going to try writing today. I'm not in the right mental place for it, and... well, there's obviously a topic I could put somepony through. But right now, that feels like sadism -- with some of it self-directed.
@#$%.
...sorry. Sometimes, this blog mostly serves as a place to vent.
I still feel stupid. But at least my breathing is beginning to slow.
I needed a reminder that there are people out there who have it much, much worse than I do.
Twitter provided.
pbs.twimg.com/media/DS9WLjbX0AIGjop.jpg
*slow head shake*
So the good news is that now I'm starting to feel depressed about something else entirely.
Hm? Well, that's an obnoxious thing to go through.
Personally, I leave my gift cards in a drawer at home, and write down their ID# on a slip of paper. If I lose the paper, it just looks like a string of numbers with no identifying marks, so even if they can tell it's a gift card they won't immediately know what business accepts it. This doesn't work for all gift cards, of course, but it's nice for the ones it does.
But, I usually insist that if people want to give me gift cards, they make it for some online service like Amazon. I'm far too paranoid to trust my money to something I can't lock down the instant I lose it. It's better if they're bound to an account, or converted into store credit ASAP. Once it's attached to my name and translated into immaterial data, it's mine forever.
But a gift card for what? General store? Coffee? Ice cream?
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It did just occur to me that if I had the number written down for something like a debit gift card, I could just try to spend it online as quickly as possible, in the hopes of beating the finder to it. So for that category, I will record data from now on.
...and now I feel extra-stupid.
I generally put in Amazon gift codes (typically from surveys or Coinstar dumps) as I acquire them. But I've never had any trouble with physical cards until today. As for Amazon messing up my balance... well, those are other stories, and a phone call usually clears that up.
Of course, that gets into the issue known as 'calling Amazon.'
wanna hear a funny story? some asshole had the bright idea of stealing the key to my locker so i forced it open with a pair of pliers, shit was already busted anyway
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I avoided details to keep it from getting more depressing, but... it was my online purchase card. In times of lesser strain, I try to keep a generic debit gift card around, because it allows me to shop with no risk of having my information stolen or other things tapped. I can use it for other kinds of shopping, obviously, but that's the central role: if there's something I can't get any other way and also can't get away without having, this is how I pay for it. In practical terms, that can frequently mean auto parts for vehicle repair. How much do you trust that salvage yard website without the https in the URL? Well, the yard can probably be trusted, but anyone who breaks into their very unsecure code...
*resigh*
As said, it was down to 20%: my engine fiasco at Thanksgiving. So it could have been a lot worse.
(ETA: before anyone asks, I was taking it to a winter clothing sale, just in case I needed a little extra purchase power for lower thermal layers. Didn't find a thing.)
It's all very simple
God is a troll & doesn't want you to have money
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Tell me something I don't know. The best way for me to summon a finance-draining disaster is through trying to save money for a purchase. I think the only reason I got away with my computer is because there was never any cash involved: surveys to Amazon to electronics.
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Oh, don't let it make you feel stupid. In an ideal world, someone would've returned it to you. Don't blame yourself if other people want to support a shittier, grimderp version of reality.
It takes a special kind of damage to anticipate this sort of thing ahead of time. More often than not, you only learn what not to do after it's already happened at least once. If that sort of thinking were common (or healthy), it wouldn't seem so clever.
...reading down...
Oh, lost your card, I thought you meant....
4768859
History is a teacher
But here's what makes me burn
It's always teaching me
What I do not care to learn
That sucks man. I really hate it when I lose things too. Tearing up the house only just makes it worse too cause after that you just have a mess to clean up as well.
You figure out a way to stop beating yourself up over things you can't do anything about now, let me in on the secret.
Belt and suspenders: Just because it probably won't turn up doesn't mean you shouldn't take steps in case it does turn up. Make sure to visit the local lost and found (not just call, because calling gets zip), leave a "I lost this" note, and then visit a week later in case it got delayed being turned in.
I wonder if the police have a lost and found...
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Don't forget the football fans who held a parade to celebrate their team's perfect 0-16 season:
i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--fGBQbRsA--/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800/nsreackimq5vi2kq8myx.jpg
https://deadspin.com/wonderful-miserable-browns-fans-throw-perfect-season-1821842220
Ah, sorry, Estee.
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Yeah, I keep a pre-paid-only credit card specifically for online purchases and nothing else. Top it up via manual transfers. It's never had more than about a hundred dollars' worth on it, and trying to go into negative just cancels the transaction, so no sudden Porche purchases from Romania to worry about.
It makes for a good insulating layer between your finances and the wider internet.
Hey, don't worry. We all do stupid shit like that. I once (recently) spent about £100 on a new set of headphones (plus case, extra wire and splitter) which I promptly lost on the bus a week after it arrived at my door. I checked with the bus company. Nothing.