Wallowing in Self-Pity and Random Ramblings · 5:07am Mar 19th, 2017
Lot of dust on this blog thingy. Might as well blow some of it off. Please read the stuff below.
So...yeah. I'm not going to lie. I've been...failing as a writer. Pretty spectacularly, even. I went into this project two years ago planning to write every day, and now I've spent weeks unable to type a single letter. It's not because of work or anything. The fact that my health is so shit right now that merely moving has nearly caused me to drop dead twice in the last week isn't the problem, either. I suppose the long and short of it is...I kinda fell out of touch with MLP for a while.
Life happens, other entertainment happens, and for a while, the pastel ponies were kind of on the sidelines. It's not that I dislike the show - even though the last season was a bit rough in places, I still overall enjoy FiM and I'm looking forward to the upcoming season and movie. Rather, other things came along for a while that pulled me away from writing a retread story like Little Sunny. I'm still working on the next chapter, but it's getting harder to care when I feel like I'm stomping over the same ground I and other, better writers have covered. Originality has never been my strong suit.
That being said, I'm still working on the next chapter.
As for me, I've been trying to get better. At the very least, I'm properly medicated and the voices have largely stopped. So that's something.
Sorry for wasting your time. I'll be back with hopefully something new, whether it be the chapter or the crossover fic I have brewing in my head. (The new avatar's a clue...at least until I change it again, thus rendering this sentence meaningless.)
Also, Dragonball Super sucks.
Praying for you, man.
Okay, so: I have a lot of practice failing at things, and if there's one thing I've learned, it that screwing up doesn't make you a screw up. Things go terribly wrong, and you barely get anything done, but that one thing that does get done is still a thing that exists. Don't stop trying. Any progress is still progress.
Bro, even if it's not original you have a fan base. What makes a good writer is someone who can take something unoriginal and make it their own. Case in point, I'm a witcher fan. The books draw so much from other fantasy genres that Tolkien fans would have an anuerism. You have an awesome style of writing that I personally have loved, so don't think you're failing for that reason. I personally have always enjoyed your work, so you have a supporter in me.
Failing at something is the first step to being kinda good at something! I know the feeling of failing as a writer. I haven't felt particularly creative since I finished up Secret of Andalantis (BTW I would LOVE to hear your opinion on it if you felt like reading it, I know you didn't like it at first, but I would still love an honest opinion, because I value your opinion man) and I even stopped my habit of drawing pages of random doodles because I felt like I wasn't going anywhere... Heck you could say I've been flexing my creative muscles in some of my boring office technology classes. I can have a bit way too much fun trying to be as efficient as possible in Excel, or I get too zealous making pretty looking documents in Word or even with the various Power Points I've had to do (the one on Tokyo Travel tips was fun but I had to cut so much for time!) that it might have satisfied me for the last few monthes.
But recently I feel it you know... that urge to create stuff. I've been thinking about my My Little Beast Wars story and Slayers F and maybe trying to do SOMETHING for the Lunaverse again. And I'm thinking that maybe not everybody gets that itch, that even if I'm not the best or not living from the stuff I do to scratch it, it is still something worth celebrating? I'm even drawing again!
I glad to hear the health is getting better. I hope you take good care of yourself. I mean I'm no stranger to emotional eating, or, even worse in my case, BOREDOM eating. Best thing I found for that is to limit how much junk you buy and force yourself to walk to grab your next fix of chocolate or chips :p Also grape tomatoes are a delicious, healthy snack. Try the orange zima tomatoes, they're like tangy.
And if you some other fluffy show to make you feel better, in the same vein as the pastel ponies I seriously recommand Kemono Friends!
The animation budget is like 3 packet of ramen and whatever pocket lint the producer had but its story is surprisingly well paced, it includes real animal facts (the humanized animal have realistic animal instinct!) and it's so darn cute and endearing!
Also hurray for Koyabashi-san and Tohru
Heh. On that last part... yeah, I feel I can't watch it anymore... Not after the bullshit diabolus ex machina ending of the Zamasu arc...
I tried... but... ugh. Then the arc going on now and Goku's characterization...
On the actual subject, just take your time some more, sit back, and relax.
don't die D:
Always focus on yourself first, man. Pastel ponies are a luxury, not a need.
4462567
Given that the Zeno summoning thing was set up most of an arc earlier, I'm not sure it technically counts as Deus Ex Machina.
Which by no means is meant to suggest that I agree with it or found it to be good in any way. I'm just being a pedant.
4462638 I was meaning the part where Trunks finally killed Zamasu... and then he becomes a Giygas and wins anyway because "screw Trunks, Goku has to shine by summoning Zeno to wipe him".
4462642
The worst part is that the entire Zamasu arc seemed designed solely to undermine the entire point of Future Trunks as a character. Yes, his future is crap compared to the main timeline, but that's kind of the point. Despite knowing that he will change nothing for himself, he goes back and tries to create at least one version of history where the world survives. In doing so, he strengthens himself enough to save what remains of his own world. His arc ended on a bittersweet, but still hopeful note.
And then Super happened, and nothing Future Trunks did mattered in the end.
If they had just ended with Future Trunks Spirit Sword-ing Zamasu to death, it would have been fine. At the very least, it would have capped off Future Trunks as a symbol of hope for the future. But nope, everyone has to die, rendering the whole arc completely pointless.
And now we have Goku positively giddy over potentially causing multiple universal genocides because he wants to fight strong people. Even when it's been shoved down his throat how everyone's screwed because of him, he just laughs it off and dreams of the people he'll get to punch. Goku's always loved battle and fighting stronger opponents, but this is...really, really pushing it.
4462683
Exactly.
BTW, love that avvie. Been seeing clips of that anime on youtube.
I'm afraid I can't speak to the suckitude of Dragonball Super, since I've never seen it. I can, however, speak to the thought of failing as a writer, falling out with pastel ponies, and feeling so messed up in the head you need medication.
I'm not going to offer any pithy advice, since I worry that might be counterproductive. All I can do is wish you the very best. Your personal health always comes first. And you do have people here who may not know you personally but still care about you and are willing to listen if you ever need to talk/vent.
As to stories, I have a tendency to use my writing here as kind of a supplementary therapy, which is probably the only reason I haven't checked out completely. I happen to think you're one of the better writers on this site -- I don't follow very many people, but I do follow you. It doesn't matter if what you say has already been said if you say it well, which you do.
Anyway, take your time and relax. I hope for your continued improving health.
If I could hug you through the screen, I would.
wishing you the best. success is trying one time more than failing. originality is overrated; unpredictable isn't a cornerstone to entertaining or engaging.
4462568 Agreed.
Seriously, I'd hate that the author that pushed me to making my own work and motivated me to hitting it big to hurt himself. So please take care of yourself first. If writing makes you happy, please continue. If it's like a chore... and it fills you with dread, I'd rather you go back to playing video games. The site will be waiting for you to dust it off.