• Member Since 14th Sep, 2014
  • offline last seen Dec 4th, 2019

MrAlterad


A brony living in the states that really likes Fallout.

More Blog Posts60

  • 186 weeks
    Trioverse Vs Canon Changelings

    Spike is friends with a changeling named Thorax.
    .
    .
    .
    Spoilers...

    So with that episode, a lot of new information was given on changelings:

    Read More

    9 comments · 664 views
  • 186 weeks
    Down Time

    Sorry for the silence and lack of updates for last few weeks. A lot of things were going on, take your pick:

    -Work was extra busy.
    -My love for Pokemon was reignited.
    -Latest WoW Expansion went live.
    -Been in a minor depression. (still am)
    -Lacking motivation to work on Teal Changeling. (lacking motivation on all fronts actually)

    Read More

    1 comments · 352 views
  • 192 weeks
    Teal Changeling: One mooore thing!

    Regarding tags:

    Adventure: Chrys and company are seeing the world and growing for it, while facing adversity. While there are slice of life moments heavily sprinkled in, at its core, this is an adventure story.

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    3 comments · 325 views
  • 193 weeks
    Teal Changeling Polish: The Second Half

    There was surprising little I needed to do to the second half of the story, compared to the first. There were a lot of chapters that were fun to read all over again. I’m really proud of 14, 19, and 21. Hopefully 27 will be on the same tier of quality.

    Nothing of note was added or changed in chapters 14 through 20.

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    3 comments · 329 views
  • 195 weeks
    Teal Changeling Polish: The First Half - New Scenes.

    I've worked over half of the story so far, which means chapters 0-13 have been looked over :twilightblush:. I've added a few things. Tweaked this and that. Fixed big derps. All changes and additions are live, though there are bound to be grammatical errors in 7-13.

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    5 comments · 354 views
Jun
25th
2016

Polishing The Teal Changeling · 6:44pm Jun 25th, 2016

Going back over all the chapters of the story to work out some issues that have grown over my own carelessness.
Gonna rub out any plot holes or contradictions. Look over dialogue. Add a scene or two (maybe). And apply any formatting changes I've picked up over the months of working on this little tale.


When I'm finished, I'll post another blog about the changes made, including pointing out the blunders.

My fav. Chryssie pic.

If you have any suggestions or details that felt off to you, now's a perfect time to shove them in my face. :twilightblush:

Report MrAlterad · 303 views · Story: The Teal Changeling · #Trio-verse
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Comments ( 4 )

Oooooh, nice idea to post a list of changes. While your story is awesome, I dunno if I'd have the time to read it whole again right now.

... Instant mental image from the title is you polishing an increasingly annoyed young Chryssie with some kind of cloth.

4048842

polishing an increasingly annoyed young Chryssie

Much like a cat, the trick is right behind the ears, and don't rub opposite the fur's direction.

Also like a cat, don't be surprised if your little Chyssie bites your hand in annoyance. (if she purrs, she'll be quick to assure that you're only hearing things) :rainbowkiss:

I mentioned my concerns about Dubs a while back, but you worked that in to show us more perspective on him.

The only real issue I would suggest working on in a rewrite is the idea that Mantis the great general is planning to kill one of two possible queens right before he leads the other queen into battle. I know that's an important plot point, I would just suggest some kind of conversation where Sledge or someone questions him on this, and he explains how he is 100% certain Queen Amber cannot possibly be put in danger, or Mantis somehow has a secret royal egg hidden away, or just Mantis ranting about how if Amber died off Mantis would rather see the changlings go extinct before he'd see them led by Chrysalis. There are lots of different ways his risky choice could be explained, it would just be nice to get some perspecitve on them.

4049881 That's a pretty good suggestion!
'
I was going to have Mantis spill the proverbial beans in a few chapters, but I think the story's gone on far too long without his underlining confidence being presented to the reader.

I have a scene in mind to address this, taking place sometime between chapters 10-17. Something to look forward to. :twilightsmile:

Thank you for bringing it up. :pinkiehappy:

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