Update 8-30-12 · 3:06am Aug 31st, 2012
My control over typing continues to deteriorate bit by bit, sadly. That's the big thing holding the updates back. It's a very strange feeling to lose control of my hands, especially the left one. If it goes too far I might have to get voice dictation software. The neuro doc says that there's no way this is ALS, which was my largest fear. MS is still a possibility, but he's unsure of that because there is no pathology yet to support such a diagnosis. (Although the MRI I had done on my mind was from an older, weaker MRI machine, which isn't as good at detecting things.) If it is MS, I will be unable to move to Canada, which would make it a double disaster.
That having been said, there are a million other things this could be, and few of them are good. The neuro doc isn't sure what it is just yet. My regular doc thinks it's all tied to anxiety. Though I am skeptical of that diagnosis, there is still a chance he's right. Regardless, I still worry, which leaves my anxiety level very high.
The other night I had to go to the ER for a major headache, which turned out to be migraines, which I've never had before. That could very well be from the crazy high anxiety (in fact I think that's highly likely). Whether the rest is or not I feel is up for debate.
I'm going to try to see the doc again tomorrow, update him.
Now, I know I sound like a worry-wart hypochondriac, and... well, I am. I've been through hell the past few months. For those who don't know about all this, let me give you the short version.
Towards the end of my last job I got appendicitis. Not fun, but it caused me to decide to keep up COBRA payments after leaving. (For those in countries that have socialized medicine, COBRA is a system where you pay lots and lots of money to keep your health insurance from your job. If you don't pay you go into the private market, where pre-existing conditions are not covered.)
The original goal of this was to use it to get old problems looked at and when I was completely healthy and stable, switch to a cheaper plan.
During the process of that I visited my girlfriend, who lives in Canada. I wound up in the ER twice when my stomach started to hurt a LOT and my appetite died. I got severe nausea from eating.
After I get home, I spent two months going from doc to doc and getting several scans. This included an MRI and a HIDA scan. They were all negative.
A surgeon finally said to get the gall bladder out. I did, and he (and I) was right, it was diseased.
Since then, my stomach usually hurts less and I can eat a bit better. But I still hurt and I still get (more mild) nausea and I still don't have a true appetite. I don't know I'm "hungry" until I double over in pain from an unknown source.
Worse, I've had this tingling and slight loss of sensation in my fingers. They're also a lot more clumsy when typing now. Sometimes they just don't respond to a command for a split second. That's what really, really worries me, and what's been holding me up from writing. It's consuming my thoughts. If this is all truly caused by anxiety, then the symptoms combined with my new psychological tendencies are just making things worse. If not, then I have a different problem and I don't even know what it is (and neither do doctors). (Worse, the neuro doc is now going on vacation until October. :P )
So, there's my rant. Now that I sound completely insane... Well, heck with it. I needed to vent, and you guys have been understanding. Thank you all so much for that!
In the future I might put up a doc for us to chat in if you guys want. I won't put spoilers in it, but I think it would still be neat to chat as I write in another window. What do you guys think?
Another question for the post: Should Shining Armor's nickname for Twilight be spelled "Twilie" or "Twily"?
-Cv
PS
Here's a teeny, tiny teaser for the next chapter as a reward for reading all that nonsense.
---
“Twilie! Twilie, what are you doing!?”
...
“Don’t do it, Twilie! Please!”
Nice teaser and just to let you know calm down no matter what it is it could only get worse the more you stress over it.
UGH Teasers are painfull.
It's "Twily" conflabit!
That teaser sounds ominous, most storys I've read spell it Twily and why can't you come to Canada if you have MS?
324537
It's in their immigration rules. If you'd be a greater than average burden on their health care system they won't let you immigrate.
324539 I'm a Canadian so I probably should have known that. I hope your condition is a product of stress
and that you get better soon
I wish you luck with your health. The best advice I can give you is to stay healthy and active. Be sure that you are getting all of the different types of nutrients you can get. Also, start exercising if you are not already doing so. These things can do wonders for your health even if you are in the midst of medical trouble. Do not worry about us not getting updates, your health is much more important.
Thank God it's not ALS I have an uncle with it so I know how bad it could be. Still I hope that you get better soon. (Why are so many authors on this site getting screwed over IRL)
Best wishes.
AGH! Teaser! AGH!
I'm glad it's not as bad is you thought it might be. That's still rotten, though. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have full use of my hands! Get better soon, eat something, drink something, whatever. And... do try to relax? Remember S2E3 "Lesson Zero" and "It's About Time" later on? What would Twilight Sparkle tell you?
Seriously, get better.
Are you sure it's degenerative? (Have you had the blood tests or nerve biopsies and such?) Things like MS generally tend to be a long, drawn out process. You know what's going to happen years before it does. If you're only 29- that seems a touch young for onset. MS is also about twice as prevalent in women than men.
Have you been tested for carpel tunnel syndrome? It's pretty benign (minor in-and-out surgery where they cut a ligament in the wrist) but can cause you to loose almost all sensation in your hands. See if you can get a nerve conductivity test done, if you haven't already. (This should also show up misfires caused by demyelenation)
Hope you get well soon.
The princesses wish you well too.
data.whicdn.com/images/35202052/tumblr_m8s9ceK8Bv1rzlhb7o1_500_thumb.gif
I've always liked "twily" better, but that's just Imo. I wouldn't be opposed to the chat, but depending on the day my schedule might not allow me to participate.
If venting here helps you feel better then I will honestly read every update (which I'm doing anyways
). Because even though it's not a cure-all a positive attitude when dealing with such things can make a world of difference.
As always, here's hoping you get better soon =3
Hey man, I really hope the docs can get this figured out for you. I'm glad you're comfortable telling us all this, you know we'll always be here to back you up!
Hope you get well soon! And just for giggles, here's a little something that cracks me up.
i.imgur.com/BCKJd.gif
Why must fanon spell Twily different!?
I'd hate for this to get worse, but I'm a strong believer in the saying "It will get worse, before it gets better."
So far, it been right.
Chattin on a doc would be nice.
324707
Because. That said, the -y ending is better, looks nicer when written out and is easily pronounced.
CvBrony: I'm not sure if you've looked into it, but one possibility a lot of doctors would be reluctant to bring up is drug side effects or interactions associated with the anesthetic used during your gall bladder surgery. A lot of anesthetics can rarely have effects similar to what you describe but for various liability reasons doctors almost never mention something like that as a possibility. It may be worth checking into both the anesthetic used on you during surgery and any drugs you've taken recently.
Even over-the-counter pain meds like ibuprofen can have a bad interaction with the anesthetic for some people, and keeping with the over-the-counter stuff will prolong the bad effects even after the anesthetic is long gone from your system. If you've only been taking tylenol or ibuprofen or what have you, switching up the over-the-counter meds you use may help if you can do that. If you've been prescribed medication of any kind, you may want to look with your doctor into switching it up.
Unfortunately, most doctors are not really trained as pharmacologists (and they know it), so this stuff can slip through the cracks.
325608
Actually they advised against the use of NSAIDs like that for a while to let my stomach recover. I've been using Tylenol. (Although they gave me some hydrocodone that I used for the first few days after the surgery, 'cause, well, getting that out REALLY HURTS. I stopped using it when Tylenol would do though.)
CvBrony: Hm. Some relatives and friends of mine have had bad luck with drug side effects so that's what I thought of when you described those symptoms.
After a little research of your symptoms, (which I'm sure you've done exhaustively already), the only other thing that strikes me as notable is the possibility your neck was hyper-extended during the gall bladder surgery. That's easy enough to test though: If you roll your head in a circle and don't feel pain, it's fine, if not a chiropractor (not a massage therapist) might be a good person to check with!
Best of luck to you in any case, I know how frustrating an un-diagnosed issue that's aggravated further by the stress of the lack of diagnosis can be.