Recommended Story Reviews #8 – Spring is Dumb, Twilight Sparkle Makes a Cup of Tea, Bonafide, Table for One, Two Peas in a Pod · 11:09pm Feb 7th, 2016
At one point, I was hoping to get at least one set of recommended story reviews done per month, meaning it would only take me, oh, a couple years to finish reviewing all the stories I would recommend or highly recommend but read before I started writing reviews.
It has been a bit slower than that. Still, I do hope you folks enjoy these.
Today’s set of stories is intentionally eclectic; some are comedic, some are sad, some are romantic, and some are just kind of odd. One is one of my favorite feghoots on the site, and one of them is Spring is Dumb, a story some of you may remember me promoting rather heavily for a while back in 2014. And 2015. And in my last recommended stories blog post, because I managed to mention it and recommend it there without even giving it a proper review.
But seriously, you should read it. And several of the others here as well.
Today’s stories:
Spring is Dumb by HoofBitingActionOverload
Twilight Sparkle Makes a Cup of Tea by Ghost of Heraclitus
Bonafide by Sharp Spark
Table for One by shortskirtsandexplosions
Two Peas in a Pod by Blueshift
Spring is Dumb
by HoofBitingActionOverload
Comedy, Romance
9,255 wordsRainbow Dash knows one thing for sure, she is definitely not a barbarous, uncivilized dolt who doesn't know polite conversation from a hippopotamus's rear end. And also that she's definitely not the one who's wrong. Rarity is wrong. Rainbow Dash is absolutely, totally, a hundred percent sure of it.
But then why did Rainbow just buy a wagon load of apology bouquets?
Why I recommend it: An absolutely hilarious story with an amazingly voiced Rainbow Dash.
Review
Rainbow Dash stomped through the Ponyville market, glowering and glaring at everything and everyone, and thoughtfully considered the importance of grounding oneself. Because Rainbow Dash put thoughtful consideration into things all the time, and she made sure to glare at everypony she saw who might dare think otherwise.
A young, fit, snazzy, totally hot, totally smart, definitely-not-a-simpleton could know little for absolute certain among the confusion and disorder of life. Grounding oneself was important. Not literally. That would be terrible. Rainbow Dash glared extra hard at the guy who sold bananas to show him how terrible it would be. Metaphorically or symbolically, or maybe both. They were probably the same thing.
With all the uncertainty in the world, it was important to ground oneself by picking out one thing in all the disorder and confusion that one could know for sure was real. It had to be something utterly, undeniably true. A rock on which one could steady oneself in times of worry and adversity. It had to be the one unchanging principle that defined one’s entire life.
Rainbow Dash’s one life-defining principle was that she was definitely not a barbarous, uncivilized dolt who didn’t know polite conversation from a hippopotamus’s rear end.
Obviously, anyone who said otherwise didn’t know what they were talking about. They would have been laughably wrong. To prove it, Rainbow Dash let out a loud, barking laugh. And then all the ponies around her started giving her weird looks so she shut her mouth and glowered again. Whatever. She had proven her point.
Anyone who genuinely believed it wasn’t laughably wrong must have been a prissy, uptight unicorn who was way too sensitive about things that no one else even cared about.
A bright red bird flew down in front of Rainbow Dash, and she glared at it, too. Songbirds flew and tittered everywhere overhead, enjoying the early spring. The early spring that Rainbow Dash had given them. Sure, some other ponies had helped, but it was Rainbow Dash who had petitioned the mayor for an early spring, and it was Rainbow Dash who had argued with the Central Weather Office to let them do it, and it was Rainbow Dash who had organized the early Winter Wrap Up while Twilight was away. And Rainbow Dash had done it all for Rari—them. The birds. Because Rainbow Dash did stuff for birds sometimes. She was, like, at least half bird, after all.
And what thanks did she get for all her hard work?
Well, a whole lot of thanks, actually. An early spring had earned her an entire evening of personal thanking. The morning after, too. And the night after that.
But not now. One little mistake and the birds instantly forgot all the nice things Rainbow had ever done for them and wrote Rainbow off as an ‘insufferable brute.’ Not that she had even made any mistake. She hadn’t done anything wrong at all. Except do all that work for nothing. Nothing but the worst season of the year. Rainbow Dash hated spring. Spring was dumb, and she glared up at the birds to show them just how dumb it was.
Rainbow Dash hoped it rained all over all of them, ruining all of their dumb spring and tree blossoms and bird songs. One of the worst storms Ponyville had ever seen. That would show them.
Thus begins one of the greatest and most hilarious RariDash stories on the site.
Rainbow Dash is in love with Rarity. But they got in a fight – their very first fight. Rainbow Dash isn’t going to apologize. She didn’t do anything wrong. Clearly she’s just buying this wagonload of flowers, and jewelery, and strange foods she can’t even pronounce, because she likes them.
That’s it. It definitely isn’t an attempt to make up.
Rainbow Dash’s internal thoughts in this story are absolutely hilarious and are a total blast to read. HoofBiting captures them excellently, but while there is a great deal of comedy in here, there’s also some real pathos as well, as we come to understand exactly what caused the fight and exactly why Rainbow Dash’s ego won’t let her come to grips with it fully, and we actually end up feeling for Rainbow Dash by the end of it, as Rainbow Dash comes to grips with her emotions and we see exactly why she loves Rarity so.
This story is great from start to finish, and everyone should read it, even if they don’t ship RariDash.
Recommendation: Highly Recommended, and one of the fifteen stories you should read.
Twilight Sparkle Makes a Cup of Tea
by GhostOfHeraclitus
Sad, Slice of Life
1,670 wordsEarly one morning, Twilight Sparkle gets up to make some tea.
Sometimes, a cup of tea is just a cup of tea. This is not one of those times.
Why I recommend it: A slice of life story which does an amazing job of lending meaning and showing character via a seemingly mundane task.
Review
Twilight Sparkle makes a cup of jasmine tea first thing in the morning.
It is always a cup of jasmine tea, just like the ones the Princess used to make, back when Twilight lived in Canterlot and shared her morning ritual.
And just as Celestia once remembered times long gone, letting memories flow out of her, so does Twilight do the same, remembering the time she spent with her mentor.
This is a pretty little showy story. It has a relaxed feeling to it, and has a tone of melancholy throughout the piece as we see what it is that Twilight is missing now, and how perfect she wants everything to be for Princess Celestia, even if they no longer share a cup of tea in the morning. The setting out of the glasses, the amount of tea made – everything shows just how much Twilight misses the mornings together, and that perhaps a bit more of Princess Celestia’s morning ritual rubbed off on Twilight than Celestia might have preferred.
All in all, this is a very nice little slice of life piece, and if you are interested in how to write a story in which “nothing happens” and yet a great deal is shown to the audience, this is a good example of the type.
Recommendation: Recommended.
Bonafide
by Sharp Spark
Romance
11,111 wordsLyra Heartstrings is a up-and-coming musician living in the quiet town of Ponyville. Her marefriend Bon Bon owns and operates Canter Candies, the town's specialty sweets shop. They've been together for years, and everypony around knows what a happy couple they are. But any relationship has its ups and downs, and it's hard to ignore every awkward moment.
Like when Lyra's ex arrives in town.
Because she thinks Lyra still has a thing for her.
Because someone's been impersonating her for the past few years.
...Bon Bon might be in trouble here.
Why I added it: This is an amazing “Bon Bon is a changeling” story.
Review
Or, as the alternate story summary puts it: Bon Bon and Lyra's life together in Ponyville was perfect - and then Bon Bon showed up.
The story commences with us being introduced to three characters – Lyra Heartstrings, amateur musician and fillyfooler who has a crush on Bon Bon, an earth pony who goes to the culinary school at the university. We also get to meet a third pony – Windy Wander, a pegasus who is Lyra’s best friend, and who seems a bit distressed for some reason that Lyra likes some other pony.
As it quickly becomes clear, the modern-day Bon Bon and the university days Bon Bon are two entirely different ponies, with the former pretending to be the latter. Things have been going decently enough, but after Sound & Stable runs an article about the up-and-comer Lyra Heartstrings, mentioning (completely with picture) Bon Bon, Bon Bon realizes the jig is up. Lyra and Bon Bon get into a fight that Lyra can’t even understand, and Bon Bon is left alone at home with her regrets…
Which is about the time that Bon Bon shows up, wanting to talk to that sadsack Lyra Heartstrings, who apparently never got over her, even after all these years.
The story proceeds, cutting between flashbacks to Lyra, Bon Bon, and Windy Wander in college, and the present, where the real Bon Bon faces off with Lyra’s Bon Bon, and Lyra is left having to figure out who is who – and what it all means.
This is a great “Bon Bon is a changeling” story. Lyra and Bon Bon are both fun in this story, with Lyra being lovably incompetent while Bon Bon is the serious one (and REAL Bon Bon the grumpy one). The confrontation scene – and the successive emotional climax, as Lyra realizes just who she has been living with all these years – is great, and the cut between past and present illustrates just what kind of person the original Bon Bon was, and just what kind of person Lyra’s Bon Bon is, and why this changeling decided to be Bon Bon for Lyra.
Recommendation: Highly Recommended.
Table for One
by shortskirtsandexplosions
Slice of Life
4,302 wordsMinuette sits outside, sipping tea and waiting for something. This is about to become the best day of her life. She knows it, and yet she doesn't.
Why I recommend it: Minuette’s infectious excitement and the central mystery of the piece.
Review
It's a warm summer's day, but I can't stop shivering. I sit outside the Milk Mane Cafe, alone. I levitate a teacup to my lips, barely taking a sip before placing it back down on the table-top's stone coaster with an audible rattle.
If only I can find a way to calm my nerves.
How long will I have to wait? I should know this, and yet I'm still here, and nothing's happened.
This is wrong. Everything has failed. Everything.
I look around me. The cafe's hugged by the forest's edge on the north end of Ponyville. The verdant green canopy of the trees positively glow in the sunlight. I feel naked, exposed. I clasp the crystalline necklace hanging around my neck, something Mother gave me long ago, back when my young, feeble mind first envisioned the Construct without knowing what it truly was. What would Mother think if she saw me now? And like this? After all these years, would I have disappointed her? Am I about to disappoint myself?
Minuette is waiting for a very important pony to arrive at the café. If she doesn’t show up, then it was all for naught. But when she does show up, Minuette can hardly contain herself. She has so many thoughts – so many questions. But this is the greatest day of her life – and the other pony at the table’s life as well.
But who is the other pony, and why is this all so important?
It is hard to really go into depth about what this story is really about without spoiling the central mystery, but it is a clever and efficient little piece. Minuette’s adorable excitement is infectious, and you are so happy for her, especially once you figure out just who the other pony is.
Recommendation: Recommended.
Two Peas in a Pod
by Blueshift
Comedy, Random
3,861 words"Like two peas in a pod we did everything together!" sang Twilight in the season finale. But what if she was letting on more than everyone else knew? What if Twilight really was a pea?
Why I recommend it: This is a gloriously terrible feghoot.
Review
Twilight and Shining Armor are pod-ponies – two peas in a pod, transformed into ponies so that a lonely couple could have children. But in the aftermath of the invasion of Canterlot, Princess Celestia plans to cast a spell which will dispel all shapeshifting magic. Twilight and Shining Armor will be revealed for what they truly are.
And then, possibly, eaten, because ponies are horrible, vegetable-devouring monsters.
But Twilight knows that, deep down inside, she’s no different from any pony. And she’s sure that once she explains about her true nature, there will be no room for confusion.
This story is about 2/3rds comically large wind-up for the final part, wherein Twilight resolves everything via a terrific speech. The story goes from silly to riotous if you are the sort of person who enjoys terrible wordplay and awful (if somewhat crude) puns, and if you aren’t, well, you should be.
Recommendation: Highly Recommended if you like feghoots.
Summary
Spring is Dumb by HoofBitingActionOverload
Highly Recommended
Twilight Sparkle Makes a Cup of Tea by Ghost of Heraclitus
Recommended
Bonafide by Sharp Spark
Highly Recommended
Table for One by shortskirtsandexplosions
Recommended
Two Peas in a Pod by Blueshift
Highly Recommended
And there we go! 115 down, 138 more to go.
Number of stories still listed as Read It Sooner: 112
Number of stories still listed as Read It Later: 418
Number of stories listed as Read It Eventually: 1816
I'm finding these blocks of text you copy-paste into your reviews annoying, TD.
I have no idea about other people, but if I'm going to read the story I'll see them anyways, and I usually decide if I want to read it based on the review, not the excerpt. And you rarely actually seem to use them in your reviews; they're just sort of 'there'.
Anyways, thought I'd mention. Maybe someone else will chime in and disagree.
Spring is Dumb is one of those stories that I agree is worth reading, even if one doesn't subscribe to its ship. The use of perspective and character voice makes it a fun, engaging read. It's really more of a character piece about Rainbow Dash than a romance, though obviously romance plays a large part in the plot. For readers looking for a similar story, A Good Princess by the same author also uses character voice and perspective in a novel way, but covers and uses a very different topic/character.
I also agree that Bonafide is a great story, but it's major flaw is that the epilogue adds nothing to the story. Worse, it actively brings the story down. It rehashes plot points that were already covered, and feels childish and vindictive. Normally I'm not a big proponent of fandom memes, but Bonafide is an example of how they can be used well. I highly recommend future readers ignore its epilogue, though.
3739379 If they illustrate a strength or weakness of the story, I don't mind them. I agree that such excerpts should be as short as possible, however. I often ignore them while reading these reviews, unless they are very short. Sometimes I ignore them anyway, because reading them in the review robs them of their impact when one reads the story later.
More like a gloriously glorious feghoot, and one of the few I truly enjoy. :V
3739592 I definitely need to read it then.
Spring is dumb is definitely one of my favorites.
And I'll continue to find your reviews clear and not so brief: I usually just check the Recommendation and Why I recommend it lines. (Mostly)
Thanks for the reviews, they are useful.
So I saw that "Two Peas in a Pod" somehow landed in the Popular Stories box. "What on earth bumped that up?" I asked. Then I realized that TD must have finally reviewed it, and sure enough...
It's a good one, though it's not my favourite Blueshift story*. I long wondered why it was in your top 15, and now I finally know: because you love feghoots.
* Although trying to pick a favourite Blueshift story is only slightly less difficult than trying to pick your favourite child.
3740231
Yes. I adore feghoots.
Which, I suppose, is always a danger sign.
Admittedly I haven't read all that much stuff by Blueshift; I need to read more of it.