A Long Needed Update · 10:36pm Aug 19th, 2015
It's been a long time since I wrote anything. Ever since I finished The Queen of Hearts, I got really busy with college. Once I finished, I thought about doing my next fic, but I've been not working on it too much due to both laziness and writer's block. My next fic was pretty much going to be Queen of Hearts 1.5 with Chrysalis and her friends being on vacation after the seeds incident from the season four premiere, but lately I feel like the plot is too weak and I am considering on retiring it to just focus on the sequel. However, I still haven't thought a lot on the sequel, mainly because I was working on this one. Outlining the story for the first fic was easy since I just listed the pairings in order that they happened while throwing in some intermissions with plot development. I think The Queen of Hearts was great, but I'm not sure if the sequel can live up to it. I did consider having it mostly being about Chrysalis helping changelings settle in, but I'd have to keep that interesting through the whole story. Another problem is that Chrysalis has pretty much developed fully as a character, so that kind of makes it less interesting. Watching her turn from evil to good was a huge step for her, so what's really left? I do want to continue the story, but as I said, I am worried that it won't be as good as the original and my biggest fear is for it to be a disappointment. I could throw in a powerful villain, but that pretty much gives Chrysalis a get out of jail free card on being forgiven and that would be bad writing. I honestly do not know how long it will be until I come up with something to write, sequel or original story. Sorry, guys.
Edit: I've decided to have Nymph star in the sequel and will be trying to work around that. Read the comments to see current ideas.
I have loved the Queen of Hearts story for a long time and always admired the way you reformed the villain with conflict perhaps a direct sequel isn't what it needs what if you we're to reform another villain. Chrysalis can be in the back ground or play as a minor character if at all. You could set it up where the villain of your choice starts out with a scheme in a manor similar to Chrysalis' but the difference being they actively preform these schemes in a clumsy manor as apposed to waiting like Chrysalis. Which may keep them on the run making possible some pretty interesting situations. Worth a though I believe, and I know you could make it work.
Sorry you're having trouble coming up with ideas; good luck.
And apology accepted. :)
One of the best problems for a story to have is for the protagonist to get where the author wants them. Just like you are worried about, it makes it difficult for them to continue to be the protagonist. After all, the protagonist is the character undergoing the change, not just the focus of the story.
What I like to see when this happens is for another character to become the focus. Let Chrysalis stay in the periphery of the story, but give another character a chance to grow. I'm not sure that Chrysalis' story is quite done though... That's up to you.
As to who or how, I have no idea! You had a LOT of story happening in Queen of Hearts.
I suppose the only constructive comment I have is to not add a new villain. I think the strength of this story was in its slice of life moments.
I put the queen of hearts into my absolute favorites. Only about 30 stories are in there. I have over 600 favorites. So, your story is in the top 5% of all my stories! About 30% of the stories in that library are a part of a series, so there are technically only about 20 unique stories in there. Also, a lot of then are from the same author, so I think about 15 are from unique authors.
I would say forget about a grand sequel and think short slice of life vignettes. It's less pressure and characters can stay the same. Plus you can have fun. Play fast and loose.
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Making it about another character is not a bad idea. Actually, hear me out on this one. This would be about a changeling who is still trying to adjust to Equestrian life. Living in Ponyville, he works his profession (unknown for now) while spending time with other changelings in the community, which would allow readers to learn about changeling culture and have events play through their eyes with occasional conflicts with their pony neighbors. He lives comfortably, but he has a big dream that can only be accomplished through the help of the legendary Cherub and Pinkie.
Seduce Equestria's newest princess, Twilight Sparkle.
I think there's potential here. First, it sort of relives the suspense of characters not knowing Chrysalis's identity. There's also of the suspense that Chrysalis and Pinkie know what this guy wants, but promise not to tell Twilight. It would have plenty of length as not only does he have to learn how dating ponies is a bit different than changelings, but Twilight is generally oblivious to people hitting on her. It would take a lot of planning, but this could work.
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A story like that can go really well I think. Or it could go really wrong in all the right ways too!
3332845 That sounds like a decent Idea I only worry that the new character wont have enough to do you could remedy this with an interesting albeit basic job. But anything can be made interesting with the right supporting characters I believe in you Rye, best of luck.
3332845 I'd read the shit outa that.
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I'm just spit balling ideas since I just came up with this plot, so how about this?
It begins with this changeling who just lives his normal day to day life. He works his job, interacts with other changelings and some ponies, and tries to cope with the occasional madness that happens in Ponyville. I'd have add some traits to make him more memorable and leave room to develop him. At one point, he goes to the library for some books, but then realizes this is the the library where Princess Twilight Sparkle lives. At first, he's very nervous and chooses to speak as little as possible since she is royalty, but they hit it off pretty well. When he goes home, he can't help but wish to see her again. He visits her several more times and then realizes that he's in love with her. He's at first very happy to be in love with such a mare and tells his friends, but his dreams come crashing down when they laugh at him, telling him that he stands no chance in getting her to love him back since not only he's a commoner, but Twilight herself did have a very bad experience with changelings from the invasion.
This puts him in a state of depression, but then he realizes Twilight has a matchmaking friend who did succeed in wooing a princess. He goes to Cupid's Arrow and upon meeting Chrysalis and Pinkie, he pours his heart out about Twilight. While Pinkie is touched, Chrysalis blows him off since he is not the first person who tried to get Twilight. Before she can throw him out, he begs for her help, telling her that his love his real and that he's not a desperate loser. Reluctantly, Chrysalis decides to lend a hoof, but only after he spends some weeks proving his worth to her, including some difficult trials he must overcome. At some point, Discord catches on to his crush and would have some fun with it. I did plan on having Trixie making a return, so you can imagine how she'd react to learning she now has competition.
Still in the planning phase, but I'd like to see what I could do with this.
3332845 That would be great. Or, you could follow Nymph's struggles with everything post-chryssy-reveal. I'm pretty sure she wasn't shipped with anyone by the end of the first book...
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
21:58_19/8/2015
3333000 I'm already liking the idea.
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You know, Nymph would be a very good idea as well. It's just I would have to think of what her story would be.
Nymph would have more appearances since she would be staying in Canterlot for several months, claiming she wishes to help her subjects with their needs within Equestria where she really just wants to visit Chrysalis. I am liking this idea more, but I would have to think about how to develop her, what her story would be, and some other aspects to keep the story interesting. As for shipping, she did have one pony in mind...
pinkie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw4464_large.jpg
...but that's only going to remain as a fantasy.
3333076 You could ship her with Blueblood or Big Mac, or maybe Celestia? The thing with doing the sequel about Nymph is that it would be a more Slice of Life tag than some of the other tags. Focusing on her troubles in the post-integration world, maybe have a group of ponies that are anti-changeling-extremists to the point where they are the main antagonists, possibly with blueballs as a leader or something? (If you've read the Hive series by Law Abiding Pony, the PCE is kinda what I mean)
Essentially, you could put it that at this point, the integration happened, but it is still fresh, and there are still quite a few ponies that dislike the whole thing, all the while Nymph tries to hold everything together as she slowly falls for somepony that she shouldn't even have a chance with due to status (Like Big Mac because he is a farm-pony while she is a queen, or Celestia because of all the political issues that would stem from it). It would have a lot of potential for conflict, but at the same time feel organic and not stiff or forced.
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
22:28_19/8/2015
I haven't gotten around to reading “The Queen of Hearts”, but I just wanted to pop in with general advice: I see you're already testing other ideas, but if you still want an epic story, there are ways to add villains without giving a reformed villain a free pass; just make the villain one that only Chrysalis recognizes as evil. This flips it around; instead of “oh, a bad guy; we trust you Chrysalis” it becomes “ why should be trust you that he/she's a bad guy? You're Chrysalis”. Now that the bad guy is reformed, the reformation can be tested for all it's worth.
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Blueblood is a jerk while Big Mac is taken. I will worry about the romance once I figure out the main foundation for the fic.
So I'm choosing to make it about Nymph since she does have plenty of potential to develop, it's just a question of how. Right now, I need to think of a main plot to keep the story interesting. All I have in mind is the start. The fic will start off in the Crystal Empire, where everyone is celebrating the anniversary of Shining and Cadance. However, this celebration is much more toned down than you would expect as it is also a day of mourning for changelings, honoring those who lost their lives in the invasion. Nymph takes part in the celebration and probably gives a speech honoring those lost and when the day ends, everyone returns home with her and Luna checking on Chrysalis, who has been drowning her sorrows in wine in Cupid's Arrow. The sisters are still a bit emotionally distant, so they spend only a bit of time together.
Some time later, Nymph sits on her throne, bored out of her mind as her workload has dramatically fallen ever since many of the changelings left for Equestria. She eventually decides that she will be staying in Equestria for some months to not only help changelings with any of their problems, but to spend much more time with Chrysalis. After that, I would have to think of what happens in the middle and end of the story. What would Nymph do to quell some of the unrest? How would Nymph change by the end of the story or what would she learn? How will she try to fix things with Chrysalis? There's still plenty of main points I gotta figure out before I get started.
As for a villain, that's a bit iffy to me. I don't want an extremist group or anything like that, but maybe there would be a few ponies protesting their presence. I really want to kind of stick to the slice of life style I had before, so I probably won't have a big antagonist. I did think of having her trying to get the changeling kingdom recognized by the League of Neightions, where every other kingdom is still suspicious of her kind and she would have to stand up against other demi-gods that rule the other races (like a griffon empress who controls the winds and the original minotaur whose body is made of stone, who shaped the mountains of the world and has the title of Bull-der King). I'll try coming up with some more ideas and see if I can formulate a plot.
3333358 I see. I personally would go more towards how I said with the extremist group thing, but only because that would have more plot stability to it. You would be able to see it progress, which can be hard in some more SoL type fics if the writer isn't careful. There were times during the first one where I was kinda groaning as I waited for more plot progression. Not that it was very bad, you're not Kudzuhaiku after all (If you've read anything by him, it's like for every one chapter that meaningfully progresses the plot, there are five to ten chapters that are just fluff or filler. He is a good writer, just kinda derpy when it comes to progressing the plot.)...
I like fics that, when in the slower less climaxy bits, have more character development and fluff, but when it gets busy, to have less filler bloating the action... One example is when there is a pitched battle, and one chapter is from the PoV of the main protagonist, and the next one is the same exact scene but from the PoV of the main protagonist's sidekick or party member or whatever... I know that having an alternate PoV can add depth, but when it isn't to set up or close a scene, and is instead used in the middle of a scene, it pisses me off a little.
If you've read the Hive series by Law Abiding Pony, the first book is more SoL-ish, and the second starts that way but progresses into something more adventure or action-ish. Don't get me wrong, I do like SoL, but I like a little more variety to my fics when they are very long (100k+ words)
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
0:26_20/8/2015
I personally think you have to write a short nsfw story about what happened on Chrysalis' and Luna's second date (the one we weren't honored to see) before you go on with the sequel, if you know what I mean. I think I'm not the only one craving for such a story.
And although I can't wait to see any other story from you in that awesome universe you've created, I beg you to carefully think through all the aspects of your next story first, so it will be as great a success as the first one. But unfortunately I'm not that big of help here, I suppose, for I don't have any ideas right now. I could be your proof reader though, if you're looking for one.
Hello, once again!
After reading all of your blogs I've came up with a couple of things I want to say.
First of all, I laughed hard while reading your list of "potential ideas for sequel". Wow, maybe you really got to give it a try as a comedy spin-off to the real sequel. It's just so epic, you mentioned almost every possible idea there is in the worst of fanfics! With their powers combined... well, we can't know for sure what will happen!
One more thing - your humanized story draft. I personally really dislike humanized ponies. What I like about ponies the most is, well, that they're ponies! There are plenty of stories of all kinds about humans, and I don't think there's such a need to humanize the pony ones too. I didn't like both Equestria Girls movies just because of that. Well, and because they made it way too childish (not that the show itself isn't childish, but not as much as the movies). I'm glad there is a movie with pony-ponies (and not human ones) planned for the future.
As for the sequel, I still don't have much ides to offer, but I think you have to make accent on another character, for, as you said, Chrysalis is pretty developed as a character already. You can still have her as a background character, and maybe insert scenes of her life here and there, but nothing more. Maybe you should write about Nymph, for we don't really know that much about her. However, I don't have any good ideas for a possible conflict here to base the plot of the story on.
Or maybe you should write some short stories about different characters of the story (like the bonus chapters you had), so you can take your mind off and take some time to consider different options for the sequel itself. Please consider writing a nsfw story about Luna and Chrysie as I suggested in my previous comment. I think it'll be a lot of fun for you and some of your readers. Or you don't want to post any adult content?
I wish you the best of luck in your work!
PS. By the way, is there a picture of Nymph anywhere available?