The Animal Story, and goodbye · 9:48am Dec 23rd, 2014
(This might ramble. There might be typos. Sorry.)
I always have codenames for my stories. That's what this story's codename was. "The Animal Story."
Some of you might've wondered, why did I ever choose "a sick depraved bastard" for my screen name? Part of it was just to be funny, of course. Part of it was because I knew this would be my throwaway porn account. I knew cloppers would like the self-deprecation. But, you know, the real reason was this: I knew from the beginning that I was going to use this account to do the unthinkable.
To defend bestiality.
I've been working on this story on and off for about six months. I've rewritten it about four times, completely changing genre at about the middle. I've researched into zoophilia as much as I could. I can remember sitting in the library, going to the sexual studies area, picking every book off the shelf, and flipping to the end of the index. Looking for that word. Zoophilia. Then, I'd go to the beginning of the index, and try to find the other word. Bestiality. So often, there was nothing. So often, all I found was a single word in the middle of a paragraph. Eventually, it became a mission. Nothing I'd ever looked into had been that obscure, that unreported. I wanted to find out more. I needed to find out more.
I think I read a good portion of what has ever been published on the phenomenon in English. And it was sorely lacking. The thing I ran into the most was, people just didn't think about this issue. They just assumed it was wrong. They cut out any reference to it. Once, by accident, I looked through multiple editions of the same book, and actually watched its coverage of the subject deteriorate over the years. It appalled me. I had never seen anything so thoroughly ignored, so intentionally silenced.
So, I wanted to write something and make people think about the issue. I didn't even care if it made people support it. If it made zoophilia visible at all, I would have considered it a success.
I can't believe how much it succeeded.
I really can't.
It's incredible. I don't think I've ever been so shocked in my life. I don't think I've ever gotten so much hope at once. I really do feel like Fluttershy, at the end of the story.
Because finally, finally, I feel like I'm not scum.
And I don't know what that means.
Just writing it was that much of an emotional rollercoaster sometimes. I really could hardly believe what I was trying to do. There were a lot of times where I doubted myself, and wondered if I was doing the right thing. That people would react favorably as you all have… it never occurred to me something like that could happen.
The world's a strange place. It can be bad. But it can also be good. I believe that now more than ever.
If this story helped you, or opened your mind at all, please share it. I want more people know about the subject, and think about it. That's all. I don't care about fame or recognition. I mean, this is a throwaway porn account, for god's sake. With any luck, no one will ever find out who I am. But if my story can do good? I want it to.
There's a lot of things I don't like about how it turned out. I submitted it in frustration more than anything else. I wanted to forget about it, say goodbye. Now I've gotten caught up in it again, and I need to stop. I've lived and breathed this story for so long, and it's messed with my head. I mean, it's made me kind of paranoid. I did most of my research in a library, without checking anything out, so I wouldn't leave any traces. I'm still a bit afraid. And I need to stop.
I need to finally say goodbye, and move on.
I don't think I'll ever be able to top this story. Don't expect me to. The most you can expect from me in the future are some quite silly and shallow clopfics. But even that will be a while, if it happens at all. I won't even feel like looking at this account for a while. I think I've answered all the questions I need to about the story, and created enough discussion about zoophilia to make a real difference. Even if I do nothing else, I think I'll be happy with that difference. That effect I've had on the world.
So, goodbye, everyone. Thank you for giving me hope in the world again. I'm going to keep writing, of course, but under different names, and in different places. Maybe you'll be able to find me.
It might not be as hard as you think, because I'm not going to give up. This story was just to test the waters, you know.
If, sometime in the future, you're reading a story, and you see a hint at zoophilia...
...you might have found me.
hey, do what you like. I don't care if you write about this stuff.
Eh, it shouldn't surprise you how well your story did, considering the number of people around here who seem to find small horses sexy.
And it was a well-written story with a touchy subject that it handled with elegance.
I'm glad my passive enjoyment of a random story I found on the front page helped bring you such joy.
I said it on the story page, but I'll say it again here: those two lines you quoted? The very end of the story? It sold the entire thing. I don't think I've ever outright frozen after reading the end of a story before, but this made me do that. It made me think. It made me reevaluate some thing that I thought I knew.
To be honest, I wasn't really expecting to like this at all. I saw the title, went "Oh boy," and clicked on the link to see how bad it was. And wouldn't you know it, it caught me completely off-guard. You're right: there aren't many bestiality stories on this site, or at all, really. I think your reasoning is completely accurate, too. I think the main reason I liked this story so much, apart from the ending, was that it didn't really support it one way or the other. Sure, you had everyone but Applejack accept Fluttershy's habit eventually, but it didn't make me go, "I can't believe the author is promoting this!" Because you weren't. Not necessarily. It handled the premise very well and provided an excellent character study of Fluttershy to boot.
I'm actually really curious as to what other accounts you may hold on the site, because I kinda want to read more of your works now. In any event, thank you for writing this, you sick depraved bastard.
Said it before, I'll say it now: Fantastic story.
I don't have anything more to add. So I'll start guessing at who you are.
Obselecence? (however tf you spell it)
Dorado?
6 months of research and work for a 3k word fic eh? god danm.....
nooooo why goooooo >_>??.....
stay and have a grand ol time with us here on the internet lol....
hmm so the literature you could find on the subject matter was extremely limited eh? i could send you plenty of material to do research on this subject from you know , there was an activist/awareness march/parade for zoophilia in germany i think only a couple years ago.....
You should see the comment sections of some of the images with the bestiality tag on Derpibooru. Debates/discussions about the subject have happened repeatedly there, on pictures like this one. (Don't worry, it's safe, aside from the topic, just Fluttershy's face with a caption.) Fluttershy being a zoophile seems like it's practically the general belief over there, and there's even a tag called "Flutterzoo".
Probably the most common argument is what qualifies and what doesn't. Some say that because ponies aren't humans, the word doesn't apply for them no matter what other species may be involved. Or it ends up with paradoxes where A = B and B = C, yet somehow A =/= C. Such as human x pony doesn't count, because they can have a conversation together, while a FiM pony with a real-world horse doesn't count either, because they're both equines, but then where does that leave human x real horse? Or like dragon-Spike x pony-Twilight doesn't count, but in the Equestria Girls universe, the simple fact they look different there suddenly means it is bestiality, even when they're still the exact same characters mentally. One person will emphatically declare that the situation is self-evident that a human with a dog must be bestiality, then another will say with just as much certainty that it's ridiculous to use that word for two individuals who are perfectly capable of having an intelligent conversation together.
The inability to reach a consensus about how to even define the word speaks to me about how much bias is involved, and reinforces that people ought to worry less about absolutes and labeling, categorizing, and grouping every little thing, and instead just consider each individual situation based on its own context.
and now we see how it really is , although you're already stated you found out as much through your research on this topic , that most of the people are cool with the ideas presented in your latest fic , however , institutions/states , be they of any kind , are only interested in silencing conversation about it , as was the case where i was having a lengthy open and civil discussion about the topic with another in the forum thread you made specifically for that purpose , it was locked as of last night , the stated reason being "that's enough of that" , the language can't be any more clear , discussions of this subject matter will not be tolerated in the public forum , i find this reality to be highly disturbing , but as far as i can tell not enough people can be arsed enough to demand a cease and desist of that blatant free speech censoring and have the institutions listen , and i can just bet if i asked a mod on the site about this they would just reply with 'it's whoever's forum and they can do w/e they want with it'.....
well at least we still have your account and fic page as a place that's being allowed free and open discussion about the subject matter , i wonder how long that will last for....
i hope you haven't abandoned the net entirely for a while yet and are still lurking so that you will see these conversations and this post as i am very interested in hearing your take on these matters......
2673722 ugh tell me about it (no seriously don't cause im all to well aware of that particular aspect) , i haven't even been able to engage in any of the discussions on this topic on that site because of all that individual bias you mentioned , i just want to copy paste a couple dictionary pages and slap it in the faces of everyone there and yell 'THERE , YOU SEE? THAT'S WHAT THE FUCKING WORD MEANS , IT DOESN'T HAVE ANY REFERENCE TO THAT AND ONLY TALKS ABOUT THIS , NOW STOP FUCKING WASTING EVERYONE'S TIME AND START DISCUSSING THE ASPECTS ABOUT THIS THAT ACTUALLY MATTER.....'......
of course if one were to actually do that 1 nobody would even care cause that's' how fucking retarded people are , and 2 it would probably get censored just like with what i talk about above in this post for having to much truth in it or some shit , ugh........
I know it's extremely unlikely but I would love to see this setting expanded on, I love fics that can focus on strange aspects of ones personal self like this and not devolve into a clopfic or the like