On The Mystquestria Saga · 7:20pm May 19th, 2014
People amaze me sometimes. They really do. I've seen people bitch about haters, complain about not getting enough views, whine about their mental "deficiencies", and even boast about the obvious "superiority" of their fics. I've read stories with preachy-as-fuck morals, stories with caustic and offensive undertones, and even stories that have pulled permadeaths on characters for no reason other than "just because". I've quite possibly seen it all when it comes to FiMFiction by this point. And fanfiction in general, I suppose.
But this... Holy FUCK.
May I be so bold as to demand of this author what controlled substance he is currently on? So that I can acquire some of that for myself, and then burn it without remorse? I've spent ALL NIGHT up over this farce, just utterly confounded by it. Why am I in such a state? Let me get you up to speed. (Although, the ones that follow me currently prooooooobably already know what I'm talking about. This is just me venting again.)
This whole mess started back in April. A fellow by the name of Mister Citadel (such a name, amirite?) posted a story by the name of "The Mare Who Wanted A Human Child". Yeah, oddly specific title, I know. It was your typical fapfest, and I quickly passed it off as such. Like most fics of this ilk, it quickly found its way into the Featured Box, to the surprise of absolutely no one. The typical clopfic audiences upvoted the fic to the high heavens, and for a time, no one truly cared. (I'd wager most of them were in it for the clop, and paid no attention to whatever the "story" tried to convey.)
But, that's when things got a little crazy. People who aren't wholesome cloppers (for the most part) started looking at the story, and began to pick it apart. The obvious flaws were singled out pretty quickly; a human protagonist that was borderline Gary-Stu, elements that are shamelessly ripped off from Myst, a pointless and obviously-contrived romance, pretty weak clop, and an even weaker story. Seriously, the main conflict presented is that Lyra - as the title OH SO CONVENIENTLY SHARES WITH US - wants to have a human kid.
Yeah. Never mind the fact this is a biological impossibility. Or that they already had three foals, which is ALSO a biological impossibility.
But, something else lurked within the undertones of that story. Something that rubbed a lot of people, myself included, the wrong way. Within the story contained undertones that suggested extreme homophobia. Because this guy apparently, ahem, "rewrote" the world of Equestria he's now in (I shit you not, that is THE excuse he gave us), everyone in Equestria is strictly hetero. Lyra even mentions that there are support groups for gay ponies. Let that sink in for a moment. THERE ARE FUCKING "SUPPORT GROUPS" TO "HELP" PONIES THAT LIKE THE SAME GENDER. To put it simply, he subtly suggests that gay couples are an abomination.
But that's not even the best part. Oh, no. He got called out on this. And his responses and "justifications" were a thing of beauty. (Beauty in the trainwreck sense, really.) People got involved - a LOT of people - and things began to escalate from there. The comment section soon became a battlefield, and by the time Citadel finally snapped and flipped on his "serial deleter" switch, no one even CARED about the STORY at this point. People who even liked the story before had to stop and re-evaluate, with most of them realizing its flaws in a flash, and the downvotes came a-tumblin' in.
I must admit, that particular shitstorm was rather glorious.
But in the end, the story was unpublished. Taken down because things had gotten so out of control, the level of backdraft from his opinions and the criticism forced him to rewrite it. So a new story, a prequel, was written: "Mystquestria: Origins". (Dat creative subtitle, tho.) It was no better. Like the story before it, this one was targeted by critics and readers alike. And guess what was in this particular story as well? While a bit more subtle, there were STILL religiously-driven anti-gay undertones. Not to mention everything ELSE that was wrong with it... Like, seriously. "Anti-water"? What the actual fuck?!
And then... it was done. For then. Citadel pulled the story once more, and began rewriting it. Cue some days of moving on to find other stories to bitch and moan at, when I notice something again. He reposted that story AGAIN. This time, under simply "Mystquestria". Way to dial back the title over time, mate. Anyhow, it was apparently rewritten, so I decided to chance another look. You can imagine my surprise when it, in fact, DID turn out to be almost completely rewritten. It was still a shit premise, don't get me wrong, but most of the bullshit of prior instalments had been cut out. (He DID add in another thing that got on everyone's nerves however, though I personally did not care for any of that.)
I still didn't like it, but it wasn't that glaringly offensive any more, so I let it slide. I figured that would be the END of it all. I assumed that story would just carry on, slowly decomposing with the rest of the fapfics and soiled tissues on this site. Mister Citadel would soon be a memory, and we'd all move on with our lives.
But then, just yesterday? Ohhhh, boy... I'm still seeing red over this.
What happened? He updated it with the second chapter. Which, admittedly, starts off pretty decent. In fact, I'd even go as far as to say it was GOOD. I was actually impressed. Nothing too glaring, nothing really bothering me, nothing of note... That is, until, something happens. Out of fucking nowhere. Something that completely erased whatever remained of my hope and replaced it with burning rage.
That guy wrote a rape scene. A flashback, to be precise; in which a lesbian OC character tries to engage in non-consensual cunnilingus with dear little Lyra, thus scarring her for life and completely turning her off to the gay.
Only one word summed up my reaction proper to this travesty: WHAT?!
I can't even BEGIN to express my scorn for this sudden swerve. After two prior attempts where the homophobia was described in passive-aggressive undertones, the author goes and PUTS IT FRONT AND CENTER.
My question for this author: WHY?! WHY in the ever-loving HELL would you do that?! After EVERYTHING that people have complained about in the last two times you tried this, you INSIST on shoving this crock in our faces? Have you learned nothing? Because I think you have. Either you are simply incapable of learning the most BASIC of tenets, or you - more likely - just. Don't. Care. Why are you a writer? WHY are you writing this stuff? Are you trying to convey a meaningful story? Or are your just trying to fulfil your own impossible wishes? If it's the latter, then don't bother to post them. No one will ever care as much as you obviously do, so spare us from your propaganda and just... get out. Ugh...
...But, needless to say... the chapter was pulled down fairly quickly after the backlash. And now he insists that his upcoming replacement chapter will fix everything. Yeah... good luck with that, pal. After that rash of comment deletions, rampant discrimination, and ACTIVELY TRYING TO PAINT HOMOSEXUALS AS RAPISTS, I doubt you have much of a fanbase left by this point. Remember how many people were changing their minds about this story mid-stroke, of course...
But hey. You know what? Maybe I'm being too harsh.
Let's assume there was no controversy surrounding this story. Let's just imagine for a moment that, in a perfect world, there wasn't a trace of homophobia to be found in this story. Let's assume that everything that was actively wrong with this story is now null and void. Yep. Let's just pretend that (almost) everything was FIXED.
What might be left over? Absolutely nothing of true value, nor entertainment. Because guess what, author? Your story is, at its core, nothing more than a HiE self-insert. It would have been featured for a time just because of the clop, but past that, no one will care about its existence. It would be an utterly forgettable pile of dreck, just like all the others. We don't care about this "Jaxxon" fellow. (Which is still a stupid name. Why not "Jackson"? It's pronounced the same way, and it's a lot less abnormal.) We don't care about your human-obsessed Lyra, which has been done HUNDREDS of times before. And better. Far better. As much as I already dislike it, I'd much rather marathon Anthropology if I wanted a story about that. We do NOT care about your so-called "ideas".
And don't you DARE try to pull the pity card in your own story. Yes, Cluster Headaches are agonizing, we get it. Not trying to say it's not a bad thing. We just don't like it when you randomly include that stuff in your own story, just to get us to sympathize with your main character. And that ain't gonna fly, my friend; your reputation and his is damaged beyond all recognition, now. You've had, like, THREE chances to do this right without causing problems for yourself. That was at least two more than what most people deserve.
And you have failed.
Apologies for directing most of my ranting towards this fellow personally, dear readers, but it should be clear exactly how pissed I am at him. And just in case it's not, let me refer you to this wonderful man to give you an idea of how I reacted to his supreme levels of bigotry and bullshit.
Just try and visually superimpose the image of a smiling Wedding Lyra on that cartridge.
I am officially DONE with this guy. Will he somehow manage to turn it around? I honestly doubt that. This guy seems INCAPABLE of listening to people. He just. Doesn't. Get it. This story has offended me a total of FIVE times; three times with the homophobia, once with the pity-grabbing, and once by simply having terrible conduct for an author. Oh, wait, didn't he make a group for his story, too? Just to "combat" a joke one that some beautiful person made for us all? Make that six times, then.
Let's all face it, folks. This won't end well for the man. His case is just so utterly sad to me, right now. If I was any less of an apathetic git, I'd feel sorry for him. And I'd probably laugh while doing so, too.
I think it's safe to say he's been put in his place, by now.
~Blinkie
...This may be one of the best blogs I've seen on the site. Good on you, ma'am.
This got me thinking: could it be that he's a sociopath? His behaviour certainly matches the criteria.
I cried a bit inside, madame Blinky. You should get followers because of your blogs >.<
This is goddamn beautiful and if you could express such intensity of emotion into paper it would be glorious.
...utter accuracy. I don't think there was a single thing false about this.
Probably the most epic blog post of the year.
2126181
Thank you. I simply felt it needed to be said.
2126194
And then have to deal with the bullshit publishing companies? Mothey, pls.
2126274
He certainly seems to fit with some of the criteria, though I'd hesitate to declare him as such right now. But I do think he's clearly got a bit of a God Complex going on with the whole "creating a world in his ideal way" thing, though. Now, I'm not a psychologist, so I can't say for sure, but his behaviour definitely raises a few red flags.
2126276
Getting followers for blogs? Whatever floats your boat, I guess. I see myself as nothing more than a normal person that is just sick and tired of things like this. If people decide that they like watching people rant about stuff, then that's about as much as I can expect. But thank you anyway.
2126285
Double-checking your facts: As it turns out, it helps. A shame ninety percent of the authors on this site don't agree.
2126355
quickmeme.com/img/2f/2f540c8631dce8a68ffa53500f45f7b5e7ecd03bed7b9c0860408e9a315bc082.jpg
~Blinkie
2126356
*hugs*
2126274
No, he's not one. A sociopath wouldn't do a self insert where he falls in love with a pony, a sociopath wouldn't reveal personal infomation like he did and sociopath would be able to easily maintain their cool in the comments (something he hasn't done).
I think he's just a bad writer, no need for other labels.
2126356
2126511 Good point. Though I wouldn't call him a bad writer for any other reason than the blatant homophobia and preachy dialogue, because he has shown he can write well when he wants to. (at least with the start of the now deleted ch. 2)
But be that as it may, he has shown he's not very bright.
2126629
Oh I know, his actual technical skills are probably better than mine, it's his attitude that I'm going off.
Exactly. Even if he got rid of all the homophobia, it would still be a very bad story. It's just so painfully generic, boring, and littered with utterly ridiculous things that make it impossible to take it seriously. It's still a self-insert with a silly name who also has almost total control over the world.
If you had fun with MC, you'd have a lot more fun with xblade.
The thought of a pony trying to "rape Lyra until she remembers the joys of gayness" is one of the funniest damn things I've ever heard of. But since the fic in question isn't a trollfic, yeah... that's pretty bad.
2127335
I meant his grammar and spelling.
cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/500x/50018735.jpg
You might find this image as an accurate representation of my own feelings for the author.
Also, another thing of note:
He kept stroking his ego over how awesome he was for creating this "perfect Equestria" or whatever, right? Well, let's count the parts that pissed me off about that in just the original version alone:
1.) If you really are the one who created this Equestria, then you should have known about a Hawaii expy.*
2.) If you really are the one who created this Equestria, then why are there still homosexuals around to use the homosexual support groups that you added into Equestria?! If you wanted a homo-free Equestria, then you could have just fuckin' made it that way in the first fuckin' place!
3.) If you really are the one who created this Equestria, then you are a horrible, mind-raping monster. Lyra doesn't love you because of your own merits, no, she loves you because you created her to be that way when you created this Equestria.
4.) You're preaching about how evil two males or females fucking each other is while hypocritically fucking a horse. Bestiality is better than gay is what you're saying with this. If I were to fuck a sheep, God would be cool with it, but fuck another male human? Oooohhhhh, no! Can't have that shit goin' on in here!
*This one counts doubly so, actually, since from what I've heard you have to have a complete book written about every possible landmark or whatever in the world in order to create it. Having never played Myst, I wouldn't know about all that, but I'll believe the twelve or so others who were all saying that that was the case.
2127291
*Shudder*
Oh god, believe me, we have.
We have...
But, for the most part, I think we turned out O.K.. *twitch*
2127260
Precisely. Which is why I'm at the end of my rope with him; it's just such a lost cause to continue this farce. If it wasn't so gratifying to take shots at this guy, I'd suggest that we just leave him be.
2127291
Oh, don't even get me started on this guy...
2127297
What bothers me most is that this all comes after the "anti-gay" messages were just undertones. They were just sort of "there". It's not hard to detect it, but it wasn't nearly as bad as what he just now pulled on us. He took the very same thing that people called him out on, and made it even worse by giving us that rape scene. Just... seriously. How stupid and ignorant do you have to be? After the kind of feedback he got, he should have avoided the topic altogether. This guy is a fucking enigma to me.
2128205
Well, that might be the first time I legitimately chuckled at something without being insincere.
2128222
He makes the claim that the book takes care of the empty spaces by using the most "logical" option, which is just dumb. Autocomplete for world-building itself? Pardon me while I indulge in a gentle laugh at this author's assumption that such a thing makes sense.
If this guy really wanted to create Equestria and the lands beyond, he would've been spending a LOT more time than he did in writing it. And because the world of Equestria is as dynamic as it is, there will end up being a point where his world will become obsolete. Hell, I even imagine that if he traversed beyond the known borders of Equestria, there'd be nothing but ocean or inexplicable white space surrounding them, and no one would bat a fucking eye.
So much this. He later made it so they were "rare, but not unheard of", which I only assume is to appeal to the ones complaining about the homophobic tones (brilliant fucking job, by the way), but it was immediately nullified by the fact that such groups still existed.
Or, better yet, he should never have brought up homosexuality in the first place.
The story actually becomes pretty dark in that regard, then. If you choose not to believe him when he claims that the ponies still have the ability to make their own choices and whatnot.
Have a thumbs-up, you beautiful man.
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw9787-download.gif
~Blinkie
2127291 Xblade... what was his deal again? Is he another comment deleter?
2129102
Yep. He also thinks negative comments are slander and will block those who "slander" him. I was blocked, and I was being moderately nice to the guy.
2129114 Sounds like a pearl.
2129126
Oh he is.
2127291 Oh, GOD, xblade. From the stretch of time he spent in a Skype group I'm in, I can say I know him well. Just some obnoxious prick who even now can't take the fall for his own actions and can't accept when people don't like him.
2129425
I don't think I could spend a minute in a skype chat with him. It's bad enough that he shits out bad story after bad story, claims they don't stink and refuses to acknowledge comments stating otherwise. Even worse, I actually look forward to seeing how the public will react to his next turd.
This was fun to read.
2128639
This was beautifully done. The more people are able to see not only the problems with his story but the fact that he's injecting his own form of bigotry into it, the better.
And this is the part I just don't get:
This is just so shoehorned into the plot that the only reason it's there is because he wants it to be in there. How many stories, especially where a human does Lyra, is it mentioned that homosexuality exists in Equestria? Why would anybody think this was necessary to the plot when it's actually not necessary to the plot in the first place.
It's a non-issue that is only being brought up because the author feel it necessary to bring up. It's pretty sad when you get down to it.