Onto the Pony Planet--Chapter 12 notes · 3:18am Apr 7th, 2014
A huge thanks to my pre-readers: Humanist, AnormalUnicornPony, metallusionsismagic, Woonsocket Wrench, and my parents. Also, joining the party for the first time ever . . . PunIntended Consequences.
It seemed like a year ago—she'd gotten in a tiff with Bon Bon
A bit of a joke at my own expense. The chapter in which that happens was published Apirl 5, 2013. It's hard to believe it's been that long, eh? Tempus fugits, or whatever they say.
The Fifth Amendment: In America, a defendant does not have to speak if he or she does not wish to. This is not to be interpreted as an admission of guilt. As the Miranda warning begins: "You have the right to remain silent."
No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.
Undoubtedly, Equestrian law is different than American—or any other country's—laws. Nevertheless, I think that Lyra (who we presume has never been court martialled before) would assume that since Fancy Pants is representing her, that implies that he will be speaking on her behalf, and that seems like a good foundation for a legal system.
While I don't know if this is true in the American legal system, it seems reasonable that in Equestria, members of the Guard are held to a different standard than your average mare. It seems like the kind of thing Lyra wouldn't be aware of.
Drawing the taser as a gun that shoots lighting was presented in the comments for the last chapter (my readers are often more clever than I am). The good news for Dale is that icons don't always translate across cultural lines: we've seen in canon that lightning can hit a pony without hurting her significantly, wheras in Western society (heck, for all I know, everywhere) the lightning bolt means "enough electricity to kill you."
Would you want to drink creamer in Equestria?
According to fao.org, cows, buffalo, goats, and sheep are the top providers of dairy products in the world (equines are on that list, too, but they're not commonly kept for milk). In canon, all of those but goats speak. All the evidence presented in canon suggests that the cows are milked (Twilight knew how to do it with magic, even).
The blue stallion is Noteworthy. My new favorite joke is a mare suckering him into doing hard work for her. Those of you who read Derpy Accidentally A Portal Gun II saw it there, too, but it was first done in this chapter, then I re-used the joke for that story.
We know they have makeup in canon; Rarity wears eyeliner and false eyelashes. We also know that they have wigs—Cranky Doodle Donkey wore one. To a species that is nearly completely covered in hair, baldness would undoubtedly be a sign of disease, and not the impression they want to give. Furthermore, they know that Dale's supposed to have hair. Naturally, their hair styles would not be the same as ours. As for the makeup, I don't really have much experience. I don't wear it for our summer gigs, and apparently, my face is dark enough I don't need it for stage, except for eyeliner (and sideburns and hair for Sweeny Todd, and green paint when I was a Winkie in The Wizard of Oz).* That having been said, since I have no idea how to put it on myself, I have relied on other actors to put it on for me, and there is a bit of trust required when a fellow actress is aiming an eyeliner pencil at my eyes.
*I got to run on stage in a union suit that was dyed pink and covered with hearts in The Wizard of Oz; if that isn't cool, I don't know what is. Interestingly enough, that moment of comedy lightened the mood after the witch melted, and was proposed by two actors (I was one of them). I don't know if I would have considered doing that before becoming a brony. These days, I've come to the happy realization that I don't really care about things like that any more, which makes it more likely that I'll wind up in a Ring of Steel show as the fairy godmother, wearing a tutu.
As for Dale's new outfit—it's not a toga, it's a peplos.
Traditionally, that was women's clothing, but neither Dale nor the ponies know that. Rarity saw the illustration of it in the visual dictionary, and recognized it. How? Well, the 'ancient pegasi' in the Hearth's Warming Eve pagent were wearing very Greek outfits, and given the prevalence of Greek mythlogy in MLP, it just fit. Once she saw Dale wearing his bedsheet, she decided to make him a better one.
Initially, I intended the wagon to take Dale to Mayor Mare's house as a holding place before he went on to present himself. However, we have seen the mayor's house (part of it, at least) in canon, and it looks like any other house.
The building he's at is significant, and it will probably figure into the story later.
I would have liked to model Lyra's dress off something she's worn in canon, but I quickly ran into a problem: the only time she's worn clothes (to my recollection) was during the wedding, where she just wore a string of beads, flowers in her mane, and a skirt. That hardly seemed formal enough.
I might have come up with something from EqG, but Lyra wasn't in it. Poor Lyra. That joke about everypony but Lyra being in the movie was true. So that was out.
Fortunately, talented artists abound on DeviantArt, and it did not take very long to find this art by krekka01, so that's the dress I described.
Lyra looks good in a dress, don't you think?
EDIT: Updates shall now be every three weeks, due to it being springtime, which means the summer shows are about to begin.
Also, for those of you who missed it in my last blog post, you can now stalk the Admiral on Facebook. Why? Well, besides inflating my ego, I'll be posting progress updates, chapter sneak peaks, and maybe even behind-the-scenes stuff. Don't want to let me know your real name? I can understand that; just bookmark the page and check in every now and then to see what's up.
That's how the bovine population make money. They have goods that ponies want. Only seems fair that they would try and make money off of it.
Would that mean that all the dairy farms are actually villages?
1987573
In all honesty, based on what little we've seen of bovines thus far in the show leaves more questions than answers. They can talk, and they go to shops on their own, yet they're more reactionary than the ponies, and some of them live on a farm.
My opinion is that they're not particularly intelligent, although they can talk. The ponies take care of them, giving them food and shelter and some spending money in exchange for milk. And now I want to write a pony version of the song Cows with Guns.
Woot-woot! Thank you, thank you, you can all sit down now. Um, no seriously, it's not that big a deal... why are you still clapping?! Stop! Please! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
*ahem* Yes, well... moving on.
Only when you're having fun, so you must be doing something right!
"Good" is one way to put it. "Stunning beyond words" is another. Both are equally inadequate.
1987617
I love the talented artists this fandom has exposed me to. The only time I've been let down was when searching for cover art for Twilight eats a Peach. Otherwise . . . well, it's like a variant on Rule 34: if it exists, it's been ponified.
1987631
Considering how that particular fad started, and how it's phrased, are you really that surprised?
That Lyra is very greek... then again the lyre (and I believe there's a myth relating to lyra?) is very greek too.
I will admit that I absolutely love the bonbon choker, a (not so) subtle nod to my favorite shipped pair.
aaannnyways, great chapter as usual. Keep up the good work, you aren't the kind of guy to go all cliche on us so I'm REALLY looking forward to the next few chapters... Or the rest of the story
Note that Lyra actually has a hat, too. She wears it when walking on clouds she for the sake of unexpected cameos.
3 weeks... that's a lot of time
Wait, you mean to imply that Dale wasn't brought to the new embassy?
On another note, add a veil and we have Lyra all ready for the wedding ceremony! ;p
1987840
Meh, at least it's not three months. And then there's the rare and painfully awesome stories that necro from the dead more than a year after being put on permanent-incomplete because someone forgot to set the 'hiatus' flag.
When Rarity started with the cosmetics, it never occurred to me how horrific Dale must appear to the ponies (vehicle accident victims in hospitals also look much worse than they seem too once the bruising really starts to set in). I can only imagine that a setting on Earth would have the lanky tentacled-armed alien being almost ghoul-like with icky transparent skin. Most defiantly a Maybelline moment for the beautician to hastily solve.
...Oh, what Rarity would give for a single issue of Cosmo or another of those thick fashion magazines that's 99% ads/photoshoots and 1% articles.
p.s. I laughed out loud when somepony was trying to be sneaky and view Dale in the bath. Subtle ponies are not. (But it doesn't matter when they're so heart-explodingly cute)
1987724
I had no trouble finding a picture of Twilight and eggplants for Harvest Festival, so yeah, I am a little surprised.
1987795
Thank you!
I absolutely love that dress. Everyone should visit his deviantArt page and leave comments and stuff.
1988027
Correct, he's not at the embassy, although in hindsight, I think many of my readers are going to assume that he is. I probably should have thought of that.
1988039
Yeah, he looks kind of like death warmed over. Kate looks a little better, since she's younger and didn't get all her hair flash-burned off.
1987586
I always figured the farm thing was them getting a place to stay in exchange for their milk and help with things. Kinda like rent
1988180 it did seem a little odd how complete the building seemed. Our next best guess was a court house or guard outpost.
1988417
Good guess: got it right with the first.
You don't have to speak if you have a reasonable belief that your testimony would incriminate you (asserting this right is not to be taken as an admission of guilt). Now, that is a fairly broad standard, especially because you have to take the fifth when the subject first comes up (Mitchell v. US includes the rather broad phrasing "It is well established that a witness, in a single proceeding, may not testify voluntarily about a subject and then invoke the privilege against self-incrimination when questioned about the details."). But it doesn't translate to "you don't have to speak if you don't want to". If the court thinks that you are mistakenly taking the fifth (that your answers cannot possibly incriminate you), they can compel you to testify (if it does turn out to be incriminating, it cannot be used against you). Or, if they have some other reason to really want your testimony (for example, if you're a low-level thug in the mafia and they want evidence against your boss), they can offer your immunity. They could offer transactional immunity (you cannot be prosecuted for any crime related to the compelled testimony), or use immunity (you may be prosecuted, but your testimony and everything derived from it is off-limits as evidence), and then compel you to testify.
1989139
Very true, and an excellent summary. I seem to recall a case recently where the argument was made that e-mail communication could be protected by the Fifth Amendment, but I think the judge threw that argument out (since by extension, it could be considered that any evidence produced by the defendant and unfavorable to the defendant was protected by the Fifth Amendment).
From the evidence we've seen in the show of the pony society, I don't think they need a legal system as intricate as ours.
And I wouldn't mind a peplos over a toga. Especially in velvet, that's really fancy. Things like that rarely manage to bother me.
2615460
She's gorgeous. I really need to use that pic as cover art for something.
Me, either. It looks quite comfortable.
...That's not funny. That's manipulative. That's a lazy female tricking a male into doing her work for her, when he likely has other things to do. It's why Hilda is among my least-favourite characters in Fire Emblem: Three Houses - she uses excuses and small talk to make others, mostly fellow male students, do her chores for her, or bring her what she wants. She wants a cup of tea? She talks about how good tea is and how she doesn't know how to make one, so could you please "show how it is done"?
Immensely irritating, and very rarely is Hilda called out on it. I can't stand this character archetype.
5285360
Well, we could debate on Noteworthy’s feelings on the matter. Maybe he enjoys pulling wagons, maybe he likes being bossed around by mares, who knows? If that’s his kink, should we judge him for it? I personally think it’s an amusing background joke, sort of an Easter Egg--and if you’ve read a lot of my stories, generally in them ponies value other ponies who do what they say they’re going to do, especially earth ponies--heck, that’s a minor arc in Sam and Rose (not involving Noteworthy).
Yeah, that seems to me to fall more into the ‘choosing beggar’ category, and I don’t like that.
If I was going to write something about Noteworthy where he was a major character, I’d certainly explore more of his motives, desires, etc., but I think as a recurring reference across multiple story universes where he happens to be the one pulling the wagon it’s probably harmless, and perhaps entertaining for the reader.