I am going through a tough time, please read! · 4:16am Feb 6th, 2014
Ladies and gentlemen, I am extremely sorry for the lack of updates on all my stories. With this post, I hope to explain everything to you all.
For those of you that follow me on facebook, you probably won't want to read this because, you already know. For those of you that don't know, I'll be giving you all the rundown of the story.
On Sunday, February 2nd, at approximately four fifteen in the morning, I was awoken by my mother calling for help. As her IHSS provider, and eldest son, I came out to see what was wrong. There, I found my mom in bed, and she started to yell through her bi-pap mask, that she wanted a blood bank, and needed help. Other than that, she would mumble incoherently for a few moments until I asked if she needed me to call 911 to take her to the ER.
For you see, for the past week, my mom had a case of sniffles, and as far as any of us could tell, she had gotten over them. But now, at that moment, I began to panic. Finally, I decided on my own to call for an ambulance.
By the time they had arrived, my mom had fallen back asleep. They woke her up, and began to ask her questions as I proceeded to listen in from near the open front door. She told them that she did not wish to go, and since I do not have power of attorney over my mom, they did as she wished over me, and left.
Shortly afterward, I asked my mom if she was truly okay, and she said yes, but she wanted some privacy. I complied by using the restroom. The next thing that I knew, I was called out in a panic, and rushing by her side, for she had fallen out of the bed and onto the floor.
Now, my mother is a big lady, with a lot of health problems. She can barely rock her way out of her medical bed to walk, let alone get up off the floor. She told me that she absolutely needed that ambulance again to take her to the hospital. I complied an made the call again.
Moments later, the same crew arrived to help get my mom onto the gurney and into the hospital. But first, we had to get her off the floor, and the nearest surface we could find, was her bed. Around an hour later, the seven of us lifted her up onto the bed, and got her comfortable. She then changed her mind when she saw the gurney, and they left once more. But not before giving me a stern warning about abusing 911, and that they might file a report on me.
After I changed her sheets and brought out fresh blankets for my mom, (for she did need them) she began to shiver, and ask for more blankets, and the heater to be turned up.
A half hour passed, and I began to grow worried as she shivered more and more under the blankets. Finally she called out to me, "Call Enloe, they have bigger gurneys that I can fit on, I need a bariatric ambulance!"
I told her, "Are you sure? I mean, if you knew that you needed to go when they were here, why didn't you go then?"
She then replied, "The gurney was too small, and they wouldn't call in the one from Chico, telling me that the only one they could get was from Sacramento. Please do what I say and call them NOW!"
And so I did as she was asked. Soon enough, the same ambulance and fire trucks as twice before came up to me, and I was told upon arrival that I am clearly not capable of taking care of my mother, and that a police officer is on their way to do an investigation. The special ambulance is on it's way, and when everything is all said and done, in his opinion, I was going to lose my mother to a home because of my inability to do what is right, and I will have to serve time in jail for abusing the 911 system.
I panicked. I tried to explain that I knew better, and that I was very sorry, and the ambulance driver took every opportunity to cut me off and give me a tongue lashing whenever he could. From his tone, I knew that I was done for, because despite the fact that I was just doing what is a part of my job, I knew that in their eyes, my mother could be held responsible, and in her health she couldn't go to jail, so I would have to accept fault and go for her.
The police showed up, and talked to me, and I told him everything. After a few minutes, he told me that from what he got out of both the ambulance team, the fire fighters medical team, and myself. I had done my job correctly, and that there would be no further investigation.
That was when the bariatric ambulance appeared. The man that climbed out, was a chief from EMS, and wanted to speak with me directly. After he gave me polite, but stern talking to about knowing the difference from a real emergency and, essentially, calling wolf, I told him that I really thought that she should go, but she's being stubborn, and did not want to go the first time. After I explained myself, it boiled down to him deciding to try to talk her into going.
After what must have been a fairly interesting debate, (for my mom had changed her mind again and decided not to go) the chief had convinced her to leave and get looked at at the hospital, just to be safe.
Once she was on the gurney, (that was much wider than the last one) The team rolled her out to the ambulance, and I trailed to try to keep her dress down, for my mom is a proud woman, and I always help her when she can't help herself to keep her dignity in tact.
They then loaded her up, and sat there for several minutes. Nobody told me why they just sat there, and I assumed it was because they were having difficulty locking her in place, or because they were still loading some equipment and doing some general clean up.
They left, and I set to work cleaning up, and sanitizing my mom's living area.
When I called, I was told that they couldn't give me any information over the phone, and I had to come in if I wanted to know anything. I shrugged it off, and decided to go later.
That evening, I showed up, and was told that she was in ICU, I go to see her, only to find her sleeping with a tube in her mouth. I asked what her condition was, and what the tubes were for.
They then told me that her heart had stopped, right as soon as they got her in the ambulance, and they had to revive her, and that it had stopped again when she got to the hospital. She was sedated, and the tube was to help her breathe, and another one went to her stomach to feed her.
Things went down hill fast from there, and talk of possible brain damage, may never fully recover, possibly has a blood clot in her lung, all this and I had no idea how to handle it.
Every day, I came in with someone different to see her, and every day the news became better and better.
Today, I came in with my brother Mike, and my friend Ted. I had bought a get well card for her, and I had both of them, and Jeff, Z, V, and I sign it. I was told by her doctor that the fact that she is responding to her name, or in my case calling her mom, and looking at people was a good sign. They are not sure of the amount of brain damage, because they were doing CPR on her, and she could have anywhere from none, to minor brain damage.
She is now mostly breathing on her own, and they are planning on taking the tubes out of her, and the sedation is slowly wearing off, and she should be cognitive soon.
I worry about her though. I worry about how long she will be in there, if she will ever come home, if I have to send my brother away when she gets back, or if I have to put her in a home, and live in Los Angeles with my Oma. I worry if I can find another job, for I do not get payed if she isn't at home, and I am not taking care of her. And I worry that if she is away too long, that our bills will fall behind, without me being able to pay for them at all, nor access her money to even pay rent so she can have a home to come to. What do I do then?
I write this down asking for nothing at this time, other than for your prayers, and if you can, send her a get well soon card.
Her name is Beatrice, but everyone calls her Bea, or specifically, Aunt Bea. Some has even had the tendency to call her Mom.
I write this to let you know why there are no updates, and why it may be a long time before there ever is one again for any of my stories.
To each of my followers, comentors, and random passerby, I love each and every one of you.
Every word, every syllable, and every laugh, tear, moment of joy or sorrow that I had ever put down on this site, I did it for you as much as I did it for myself. I hope that you will forgive me for all this, and accept me for who I am, a human being with a family to care for, as creative as I may or may not be, I am still a poverty line treading human being, problems, faults and all.
I love you all, and I hope that you will wait for me.
Most sincerely yours,
that's so sad..... we will.
by the way, Aunt Bea? you live in Mayberry with Andy Griffith?
I shall pray for her, that she recovers, and that things get better soon.
To have been taking care of your mom like this, it is a sign of TRUE love right there. She has an incredible son.
1801683
No, I don't.
*clasps hands together* I'll pray that Beatrice will make it through and that you can get back to writing your stories.
Already, the world seems a bit less bright...
Sorry to hear about that, that's terrible. My only two bits would be to consider getting power of attorney over her, assuming she's well enough to sign. That will at least get you access to her money to pay the bills.
Best thoughts go with you. Sounds like a whole lot of unnecessary stress above and beyond the medical issues. If it helps, remember that you did the right thing — for all the stern lectures they tried to give you (and siccing the police on you!), if you hadn't persisted, she would have had her heart failure in a bed at home rather than under direct medical supervision, and the end of your story would have been a lot different.
Aw man, I wish I could give you a hand... all I can do from here is pray for you and your mother.
I just don't know how to react, I want to cry but can't
. All I can say is that you and your mother are in my prayers, Please feel better and I hope Aunt Bea gets well soon.
Having gone through a similar sort of scare with my Mom's Mother (My Granny) My heart goes out to you.
Congratulations for sticking to what's right, despite others arguing. I honestly question if the ambulance guys were acting within their rights threatening you like that but I'm so glad to hear your Mom seems to be improving. Catching such things quick is the critical thing and it sounds like they have.
I think it might not hurt for you to get at least partial power of attorney even if she results in having no problems whatsoever. Just know that you did the right thing and she sounds pretty tough as well. Don't forget that your family can surely help support you too. We're here as well, even if it's only in a voice on the net kinda way.
I pray for you, dear friend.
i wish her a speedy recovery.