Tradition · 3:05pm Dec 31st, 2023
This one's particular poignant. Singing this on January 1 is a twelve year tradition at this point.
So fun facts
1) Did you know you don't have to be epileptic to have seizures?
2) and if you have a seizure lasting longer than five minutes you just straight out have a 20% chance of dying in the next thirty days, apparently
3) and if your eyes start doing this then it's much higher
4) and if that starts happening after your third seizure that's lasted longer than thirty minutes in a week, then it's probably time to go to the emergency room
5) the emergency room could not provide me with a fun fact about this, because "neurology is complicated". I guess that is a fun fact, though.
6) It is actually a form of hell to have a seizure that destroys your mind completely in the middle of a new years eve party and to lose the ability to move completely, to be so frozen in agony you cannot even sob from the pain of the seizure and the position your body is rigidly locked in, unable to ask for help because you can't even think in language anymore because that's destroyed too, and to have no one notice for fifteen minutes because they think you've just fallen asleep in an awkward position, so the party just goes on around you. (It took about two hours to start getting things back again, I can type even if I can't speak, and I can walk with the help of a cane right now)
7) I would not notice if this kills me, because I would go to hell and the difference would be too subtle to notice.
8) I am going to make it through this year if it kills me
9) I am going to make it through this year if it kills me
I did have a fun moment in the ER though, part of the neurological exam is jaw movement and I'd been trying to explain how much something has to hurt before I can feel it.
And how my jaw is so clenched from pain the last few weeks it's being dislocated like twice a day? The tension it's under keeps pulling it out of its socket.
So when the doctor gets me to move my jaw I just have to grab my face with both hands and twist and there is just a huge crack like a highschool teacher slamming a ruler against the desk to get the classes attention
And the look on his face when that happens twice because I have to do it on the other side too, and bastard that I am, I do it while smiling.
"That's a good example of something that should probably hurt, right?"
"That... Needs surgery."
"My brother in Christ, this is what it's like after full reconstructive surgery. This is like 15% titanium you're hearing. That is how much tension this is under."
You do not how satisfying it is to have crossed a threshold of fucked up that you have upset and disturbed an ER doctor into visibly uncomfortable silence. Dude legit needed a moment.
... anyway it turned out to be a problem because answering "Do you have headaches" with "I don't know" meant they couldn't rule out a brain tumour. And its not a brain tumour, like, it's fine, it's not, it's just a problem they can't rule that out so I need to prove it isn't in more annoying ways.
All I know is we ruled out epilepsy, stroke and infection. It couldn't be something fatal anyway because I need to finish the second draft of this second book first, and until that happens I refuse to die by any means.
Happy New Year.
well ... your life is much more {medically} complicated than I have here. I wish you ... finding some ways to improve it.
5761618
I also currently don't have a pension because my doctor won't fill out paperwork I need to be classified as disabled, and my writing income couldn't be lodged because the tax office can't recognise my identity as valid. Two social workers couldn't figure out why and now I don't have access to social workers because it causes my pension to be cut off.
Writings been really good though! Literally all that matters.
Good god. You just can’t catch a break, can you?
Happy new year, please don’t die!
I mean, I kind of assumed from the Electric Soldier Porygon incident that that was possible.
Plus, aren't you the protagonist's Australian best friend? Pretty sure you can't die from something so narratively unsatisfying and as a writer you'd be especially aware of such. (For those who don't know, this is a running gag from Aragon's blogs where I treat his life as a sitcom because have you seen it?)
You are not allowed to die until you come to EFNW so I can give you a hug and thank you in person.
(After that we can go talk about rabbits by the river if you want)
Holy carp, dude!
Wow, really hoping you get into and stay in a more stable state.
...Yikes.
Oh. My.
Good luck!
My condolences, that all sounds like it suuuuscks
I've never dealt with that level of pain, but I definitely get what you mean on some level about 'some stuff always hurts and you just stop noticing it' and then get confused when it drops other people.