Friendship is Card Games: Tell Your Tale, Pt. 16 · 12:11pm Oct 29th, 2023
With Chapter 5 reviewed and Secrets of Starlight still about a month away, I can start addressing the accumulated backlog elsewhere. This week, that means Tell Your Tale shorts. Let’s see what we’re working with.
Pipp at a product launch. Of a fragrance. Why don’t I see this going well?
Oh. Well, it isn’t the worst thing anypony’s ever smelled, so that’s a step in the right direction. It does seem to have attracted a stampede of some kind to Mane Melody.
Also, there’s the question of what accent Pipp is trying to imitate. It’s French, sure, but given how the known world has contracted to three cities, where’s the Prench Quarter? Is there a meticulously maintained microculture somewhere in Zephyr Heights?
Ah. The opposite of the stinkthistle polish; this one smells too good to Maretime Bay’s wildlife. I’d ask how this never came up in testing, but it’s clear that Pipp has never tested any of her products before bringing them to market.
Whoops! Never mind, it is horrible in vast quantities. Though the same could be said of most fragrances. Dosage is always an important consideration.
Oh, right. This one came out between Misty’s heel-face turn and her dye job. I’d forgotten and hadn’t expected to see her original mane.
For once, a disaster of cosmetic alchemy isn’t Pipp’s fault. Not entirely. Don’t leave open trash cans next to the open vat of perfume next time. (And again, apparently nopony bothered to smell the finished product before bottling it. Or Izzy did all of the bottling “as a favor” to cover her tracks.)
Izzy saying “We can fix this” is concerning on a number of levels. I definitely believe she can salvage the situation. The question is how the end result will look to anypony else’s sense of aesthetics.
… though I am immediately noticing the Coyote Fallacy (i.e. if something didn’t work once, it clearly will never work ever and should never be reattempted.) The last batch didn’t work because of an unforeseeable and preventable accident. Why not just make it again? Did Pipp harvest something to extinction to make it?
“Yeah, as if we’re just going to stumble across a flower never before discovered by whuaaa—!”
At least this time it wasn’t growing in the middle of the road. 
Blue flowers in the middle of what may be the Everfree…
I doubt it’s going to be poison joke, but I’d love if it was. Heck, that’s a story idea right there.
Pipp’s probably being metaphorical, but I do wonder what scent she associates with a million upvotes. (Well, “hooftaps.” Maybe that’s just views.)
“These flowers must smell like your favorite thing!”
Ah, they’re related to the Utopia Tree.
Hmm. Going by how Pipp immediately breaks out a shovel, maybe she did harvest something to extinction for that last fragrance…
Also, credit to Izzy for insisting on sustainable sourcing methods… though it may lead to some supply issues.
I’m not sure what law and order smell like, but I’m going to say oven-fresh white bread. As for hoof polish… well, at least it’s not acetone. (And it’s really tempting to read more into the crescent moon hooficure on a pony with a bluish purple coat.)
Pipp. Think about your supply issues before the launch. And maybe don’t go full Once-ler. Especially if it starts spreading unspeakable blight in the forest.
Hmm. If one lost grove is enough to get the entire Bridlewood to collapse, maybe it isn’t the Everfree. Or maybe it’s just trying to teach Pipp a lesson.
… You know, when I made that Lorax reference, I wasn’t expecting a Truffula tree to show up. (Okay, it’s more a cherry/willow hybrid, but still.)
Ah, the Fragrance of Harmony. I can only imagine what Sunny thinks of the name. Also, kind of messed up that Pipp’s employing greenwashing, but at least this is a rare example of a corporate executive genuinely caring about the ecological impact of her actions.
… Okay, why are these grown mares suddenly in the Girl Scouts? We have established child characters that could be used here. Yes, Sunny’s always had a sash of sorts, but that was attached to a messenger bag and had the cutie marks of Bearers of Harmony.
That may have been an alicorn-level display of earth pony magic, but the question of the economics of food in this era still hangs over the proceedings. (A point I shamelessly stole from Estee. Like them, I’m not sure how to actually resolve the issue when it’s raised.)
Ah, the carrots getting eaten by the critters was deliberate.
What, and more importantly, why are the Trail Trotters? Also, why Windy? I can only imagine how Posey feels about her best friend hanging out with the grand menace of Maretime Bay.
Also also, I know that crosswalk badge is probably for pedestrian safety, but I like to think it’s for performing your favorite song from Abbey Road. 
“Are there any badges you can earn with your friends?” Sunny asks after earning three badges with a friend.
It seems the Trail Trotters are a very new organization if the illustration for “a whole group” has one pony of each tribe. That or they’re a very old one that was recently reformed/rediscovered. Either way, it still seems these two are a little old for it. I know, I know, target audience, but we still have fillies for this.
Heh. The immediate rainstorm’s right up there with “Rarity loves camping!” into “I detest camping.” And I appreciate how neither Windy nor Izzy even flinch when something skitters by.
Just because Pipp’s committed to more sustainable resource acquisition doesn’t mean she’s comfortable with mud outside of a spa.
Ah, Sparky existing solely to cause problems. How I didn’t miss you in the least.
I do appreciate Izzy’s casual attitude to bog mummification.
“I know that rock” makes no guarantee about the terrain between you and the rock. But apparently it worked out fine this time. (There’s also the question of how Sunny knows the rock.)
Nice character note with Misty focused on securing the perimeter. If nothing else, Opaline gave her a healthy awareness of her own mortality.
Apparently that tent was provided by the sheriff’s office. Possibly a case of using the whole year’s budget.
I’m not sure what’s worse, Hitch not thinking to have Sparky take care of the fire in the first place, or the writers once more reaching for the low-hanging musical fruit.
Huh. Bunnicorns we’ve seen before, but pegabuns (Lepusus? Angel bunnies?) are new.
A butterfly-marked pony struggling to assert herself while talking to a rabbit. The more things change…
I have a number of concerns about those crystals…
Oh! Of course. “Bunnisus” isn’t just a portmanteau of bunny and colossus, but also bunny and pegasus. Took me a second there.
Good thing they apparently had two Sunny-personalized wheelbarrows full of carrots, and that the bunnisus only had the appetite for one.
Given how her stolen cutie mark is still unresolved, POsey’s suffering here just feels cruel.
I have a number of questions about Alphabittle's customer (Vanilla Swirl, going by the Derpibooru tags.) Is… is the ice cream cone part of her horn, or just an accessory?
Tremors in Maretime Bay that can be felt in the Bridlewood? I’m surprised the shore town is still standing. Though I suppose it was built with hurricanes in mind.
Ah yes, kaiju baiting, everyone’s favorite game of life and death.
I do love the deranged look on Windy’s face as she passes the giant carrot to Pipp. This is a mare who’s been waiting for her chance at protagonist-grade shenanigans for a long time.
It always had wings, Sunny. Though you can be forgiven for thinking the square-cube law would work in your favor.
Hmm. Six crystals restoring balance to magic run amok. That’s familiar… though it’d be nice to know how Izzy knew that would work. (Granted, it’s Izzy. If you asked her, the answer would probably be “I didn’t! 
”)
“Gigagems.” I see. So these are a known phenomenon. Going to do something about them? No. Understandable, have a nice day.
Wait, when and how did the others get the other badges? Yes, critter care’s a slam dunk for Hitch, but is literally every pony enrolled in this program? One which we likely will never hear about again? Seriously, if they wanted to do a kaiju fight, I feel like there were better options for the framing device.
“Dragonlands, here we come!”
The general consensus when this came out did seem to be that it was skipping past some plot revelations. Probably a good thing I’ve waited to see it until now. Still, Chapter 5 was definitely out by this point.
Curious to see the royal sisters wearing tiaras. I wonder if they’re going to the Dragonlands in an official capacity. Given the track record with the rest of equinity, they may might plan on claiming those lands in the name of Spain Alta Torrezon Zephyr Heights.
Also, Pipp’s tiara has three lozenge-cut sapphires. I wonder if Sunny offered any input about the design. It’s certainly not as color-coordinated as Zipp’s.
Time and place, Pipp.
The Marestream may have a problem with lightning strikes, but crash landings it can handle just fine.
… There was an invitation? Okay, we’re definitely still dealing with future developments.
“I thought we stopped Opaline’s evil curse!”
Is it really so hard for the left hand to know what the right is doing?
“I know evil. This isn’t it.”
Seriously, I love the idea of Misty taking her past experiences and all but weaponizing them in the name of good. There’s a strong character concept for a paladin here, going hand in hand with her being almost impossible to frighten.
“Bravery, wisdom, and creativity”
Very interesting that these are valued draconic virtues in this time. It appears a number of dragons had major impacts on the modern culture: Ember, Spike, Smolder, even Garble. Certainly a far cry from Torch’s “strength above all” stance. (There is the question of how the dragons even know what Nightmare Night is, but that may be answered when Make Your Mark catches up to this short. Along with where they found the pumpkins in the quasi-Mesozoic jungle that is the G5 Dragonlands.)
I feel like “dress with sparkles” doesn’t quite convey the intended message of “Bring a light source.”
Also, perfectly placed- and sized-pit traps always bother me. This required advanced knowledge of where the Marestream would land… though I suppose the dragons always could’ve led the ponies to the pit over the course of that conversation.
Ponies trapped in a magma chamber. Somehow still familiar, though Sparky isn’t competing to become Dragonlord.
Apparently earth pony plant magic doesn’t require any seeds, just soil. That or Hitch always carries seeds on him for just such an occasion.
I suppose flying above the pendulum blades wouldn’t be sporting. And might have gotten Zipp bisected with that last pair.
… You know, it would’ve been nice to see some kind of drain in the floor rather than just have the lava clip through it. Also, where’s the light coming from now?
Seriously, Misty is becoming one heck of a paladin.
… Oh goodness, the last one is a Zelda shadow puzzle. Do they really need to open this shrine?
Also, apparently Sunny’s horn is opaque when it needs to be.
… The fire cast a shadow.
The fire cast a shadow.
THE FIRE—
Okay. I’m okay. We’re just going to move on and never—
THE FIRE
Ahem. And never speak of this again.
“Never expected to see you ponies again.”
So this dragon legitimately thought he was sending them their deaths and is disappointed that they escaped. And he isn’t currently cursed by Opaline. Well, I did say that Garble appeared to have influence on modern dragon society…
In all, this… Well, I can’t really judge it yet. Not without the further context that I’ll have once Chapter 6 drops. (Also, I’m not sure, but it looked like one of the dragons had a cutie mark? It already looks like the 3D dragon model is a modified pony, but that feels a bit much.) Still, very much enjoying this concept for Misty’s further development. If only there were similar plans for the rest of the main cast…
Ah, Nightmare Night at the Night Market (as the title implies.) Surely nothing bad could happen in the realms of the fae around Spooky Season. … Or, going by the lack of costumes, maybe it’s just an unfortunate collision of terms.
A globe. Makes me wonder how much that could help rediscover… assuming it’s for this world.
Hmm. Posey has her cutie mark, but given the previous short, I’m not sure whether this is before or after she lost it.
Kind of weird to have the pop-synth remix of Moonlight Sonata playing during this sequence, but I do enjoy the track.
I suppose that by “quality time,” Alphabittle means “quality time with you and not just my memories of the daughter I lost.”
Oh. Oh no. The youthening glitter. And hey, Hitch was the problem. That doesn’t happen as often.
Also, something resembling continuity! I’ll take it. I just hope the shopkeep does have a “You got cursed by it, you bought it” policy.
Oh good, there’s a minimum age. Otherwise Sparky might end up a freshly-laid egg. Also, presenting Alphabittle was a toddler version of his long-lost daughter is just cruel.
And absolutely nopony else wants to secure the rampaging toddlers. It’s understandable—the bystander effect is strong even when you’re not dealing with the consequences of grabbing someone else’s kid—but after seeing Alphabittle inadvertently bodyslam a few stalls, I’d expect ponies to try to lend a hoof.
Remember, folks, just because something at the faerie market is shaped like fruit, that doesn’t make it safe to eat.
Oh. Well. That’s one way to get bat ponies. They’re actually dragons.
Poor Posey. Her suffering is eternal.
Sparky having to hold back Hitch, on the other hand, is pure karma.
Either Opaline set up surveillance cameras in the Night Market or somepony’s streaming this. I’m going to assume the latter. Also, are they still not putting down Opaline for good, or is this pre-“Nightmare on Mane Street”? (Clearly I was too hasty to praise any glimmer of continuity.)
… Okay, so Opaline has new servants. That answers one question while raising many others.
When all you have is a teapot mark, every problem looks like a kettle. Or something like that.
Yeah, any plan that hinges on feeding something bitter to one-year-olds is a bad plan.
Credit where it’s due, they managed to fit in some legitimate emotional poignancy in Alphabittle hesitating to give the cure to Misty.
Okay, so now we just have mutually incompatible timelines, unless Posey’s mark got returned without Opaline actually getting thwarted in any meaningful way. Also, apparently the ranting alicorn with the crown like a heavy metal band logo doesn’t register as a threat until she actually takes hostile action. (I’d like to think the breezies cursed her within an inch of her life for assaulting somepony during the Night Market, but I’m aware that most of the menace is a meme on my part.)
In all, this is a mixed bag, not least because the shorts are blithely marching into Make Your Mark spoiler territory. I’m not sure what to make of some of this, but make something I shall. Bear in mind that the mechanics of Lost Caverns of Ixalan are fair game. (As are those from the Fallout decks, though I don’t foresee using rad counters unless I end up covering Fallout: Equestria and its offshoots.)
Caretaker’s Burden W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
When Caretaker’s Burden enters the battlefield, enchanted creature’s controller creates a 1/1 white Pony creature token.
Enchanted creature can’t attack or block as long as its controller controls a token.
“I’m single for a reason!”
Trail Trotter 2W
Creature — Pony Scout
Whenever Trail Trotter or another creature with power 2 or less enters the battlefield under your control, that creature explores. (Reveal the top card of your library. Put that card into your hand if it’s a land. Otherwise, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature, then put the card back or put it into your graveyard.)
2/1
Paladin of Redemption 2WW
Creature — Unicorn Knight
First strike, vigilance
When Paladin of Redemption enters the battlefield, exile up to one target black creature an opponent controls until Paladin of Redemption leaves the battlefield. You may cast that card for as long as it remains exiled.
3/4
Stand United 3WW
Sorcery
Convoke (Your creatures can help cast this spell. Each creature you tap while casting this spell pays for 1 or one mana of that creature’s color.)
Destroy all tapped creatures that didn’t convoke this spell.
Many hooves make light magic.
Tiara of Generosity 1U
Artifact — Equipment
Whenever Tiara of Generosity becomes attached to a creature, you may have an opponent gain control of that creature until Tiara of Generosity becomes unattached from it.
Equipped creature gets +2/+2. If you don’t control it, it’s goaded. (It attacks each combat if able and attacks a player other than you if able.)
Equip 2
Cauldron Stirrer 2U
Creature — Unicorn Warlock
Whenever a nontoken artifact enters the battlefield under your control, create a Sorcerer Role token attached to target creature you control. (If you control another Role on it, put that one into the graveyard. Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has “Whenever this creature attacks, scry 1.”)
1/4
Misleading Directions 4U
Instant
This spell costs 3 less to cast if its target explored this turn.
The owner of target creature puts it on the top or bottom of their library.
“Huh. Why does north point down on this map?”
Inevitable Obedience 4UU
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
You control enchanted creature.
Foretell 2UU (During your turn, you may pay 2 and exile this card from your hand face down. Cast it on a later turn for its foretell cost.)
All things serve alicorns eventually.
Night Market Tincture 1B
Sorcery
Fathomless descent — Destroy target creature or enchantment with mana value X or less, where X is the number of permanent cards in your graveyard.
Alphabittle didn’t know much about magic, but he knew tea backwards and forwards.
Cackling Cave-Shadow 2B
Creature — Dragon Shade
Menace
Cackling Cave-Shadow can’t block.
(br): Cackling Cave-Shadow gets +1/+0 until end of turn.
The souls of those who couldn’t pass the Lavarynth linger there, mocking those who think they can do better.
1/1
Reeking Recruitment 2BB
Sorcery
All creatures get -2/-2 until end of turn. Amass Raccoons 2. (Put two +1/+1 counters on an Army you control. It’s also a Raccoon. If you don’t control an Army, create a 0/0 black Raccoon Army creature token first.)
Pipp is accustomed to leading a horde.
Ecological Collapse 3BB
Enchantment
Whenever a creature dies, that creature’s controller sacrifices a land.
When a player controls no lands, sacrifice Ecological Collapse.
Ponies were once the stewards of nature. They still have the power to influence it to tremendous, terrible effect.
Wrought-Iron Chandelier 2R
Artifact
When Wrought-Iron Chandelier enters the battlefield, it deals 3 damage to any target.
Craft with artifact 2R (2R, Exile this artifact, Exile another artifact you control or an artifact card from your graveyard: Return this card transformed under its owner’s control. Craft only as a sorcery.)
Wicked Crown
(R) Artifact — Equipment
Equipped creature gets +3/+0 and has menace and first strike.
Equip R
“The perfect balance of functional and theatrical villainy.”
—Opaline, the last alicorn
Caldera Clan Initiation 3R
Enchantment
When Caldera Clan Initiation enters the battlefield, it deals 2 damage to each creature.
At the beginning of your end step, if you descended this turn, Caldera Clan Initiation deals 2 damage to each opponent. Then transform Caldera Clan Initiation if if an opponent has 10 or less life. (You descended if a permanent card was put into your graveyard from anywhere.)
Dragonlands Lavarynth
Land — Cave
T: Add R.
2R, T: Creatures you control get +2/+0 and gain trample until end of turn.
For dragons, it’s a rite of passage. For everything else, it’s several varieties of deathtrap.
Scourge of Cartographers 3RR
Creature — Dragon
Flash
Flying
If another creature would explore, Scourge of Cartographers explores instead.
“Here there be dragons” isn’t a warning. It’s an admission of defeat.
3/3
Skysplitter Bolt 6R
Instant
You may pay 1G rather than pay this spell’s mana cost if it targets a creature with flying.
Skysplitter Bolt deals 6 damage to any target.
The Dragonlands have little love for invaders.
Tempt With Nostalgia 2G
Sorcery
Tempting offer — Return a card from your graveyard to your hand. Each opponent may return a card from their graveyard to their hand. For each opponent who does, return a card from your graveyard to your hand. Exile Tempt with Nostalgia.
Start indulging and you may never stop.
Mend the Grove 3G
Sorcery
Whenever a land enters the battlefield tapped and under your control this turn, untap it. Return up to two target land cards from your graveyard to the battlefield.
“Our magic stopped the blight. I still don’t know what can stop Pipp.”
—Hitch Trailblazer, Maretime Bay sheriff
Wide Ranging 3G
Sorcery
Search your library for a land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. When you do, put X +1/+1 counters on target creature, where X is the number of different land types among non-Locus lands you control.
Exotic cuisine is always worth the trip.
Summoning Swarm 4GG
Sorcery
Create two 1/1 green Rabbit creature tokens, then discover X, where X is the number of creatures you control. (Exile cards from the top of your library until you exile a nonland card with that mana value or less. Cast it without paying its mana cost or put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)
Gigagem Bunnisus 1(gw)
Creature — Rabbit Pegasus
5GW: Monstrosity 5. This ability costs 1 less to activate for each permanent attached to Gigagem Bunnisus. (If it isn’t monstrous, put five +1/+1 counters on it and it becomes monstrous.)
Gigagem Bunnisus has flying and trample as long as it’s monstrous.
2/2
The Onceler’s Lament 3RW
Enchantment — Saga
(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after III.)
I — Each player creates X Treasure tokens, where X is the number of lands that player controls.
II — Destroy all artifacts and lands.
III — Unless — Return target land card from your graveyard to the battlefield.
Utopia Grove
Land
Utopia Grove enters the battlefield tapped with two depletion counters on it.
T, Remove a depletion counter from Utopia Grove: Add GW. If there are no depletion counters on Utopia Grove, sacrifice it.
Take only what you need, for there is only so much to give.
... I can't help but wonder if decades of 'friendship' caused G5 dragons to be pony/dragon hybrids...
It'd at least be an in-setting explanation for their poniform nature and the maybe-cutie-mark you saw
Edit: Heck, maybe opaline's dragon-power-stealing magic is related to the whole cutie mark stealing thing, too, if that's the case... probably not, but I can theorise.
I was hoping for a Bunnisus with Monstrosity and I was not disappointed
The fortnightly release schedule is just enough to have made me not notice that, just four shorts later, last Thursday, they had another short pivoting around Pipp being terrible at the chemical aspect of making new products. Even if that newest one wasn't her fault, it really shows both how strapped they overworked and underpaid writers are for ideas, and how little they (and the execs) anticipate viewers remembering any of the shorts' content beyond the experience of watching them. Better hope those two don't get clumped together in a compilation…!
Are Posey and Windy friends? Certainly not in Chapter 1, and Posey had appeared little enough since to draw any conclusions. Is this based on their short scenes in "Mane Smelody", or just a tendency towards them being nearby in background shots in TYT? I'd buy the latter being enough, it was for Lyra and Bon Bon…
Yeah, her mane really caught me off guard. Thought I was looking at an Alcremie, of all things.
It really was astounding, how utterly unrelated the framing device and actual thrust of this short were. Of course, I don't blame the writers, after chunking out sixty of these nothingburgers that give no room or freedom for much of anything.
Not really a reply to a specific point, but as Windy's first prolonged speaking appearance, whoa boy, does her voice sound ill-fitting coming out of her character model. It's just so deep and mature, but in a rather artificial lit.
Lavarynth is one where you can tell they really want to do something exciting, but the show's tone and length and restrictions just prohibit more than a few feints at a dungeon quest and Misty showing some courage.
I wouldn't expect anything logical; by now we've had a TYT short act as something of a precursor to a MYM episode/chapter, but turn out to be timeline-incompatible. Most notably the alternate origin for how Zipp and Izzy turned a broken-down tram cart into the Marestream.
As will I; they're going to recycle prior shorts out of forced desperation either way, might as well have it a proper in-universe sequel.
It would hit a lot harder in a series that didn't pull its emotional punches so much – we get one line from Alphabittle when he's considering leaving Misty be, and it's so sanded down as to feel artificial – but it's something, and considering how much of a punching bag he's been in TYT prior, it's a massive step up for him.
And yep, the huge timeline incompatibility of Posey having her mark again in a short where Opaline uses another Together Tree to steal Onyx's cutie mark, being shoved in our face (prior ones were largely just background details), really speaks to how much the writers, Hasbro, Atomic and Li'l Critter Workshop care about making it all match up, or anticipate their viewers will care. Sigh.
At least this will cease to be a thing in a month's time when TYT will have no higher series to bend to the whims of. For better or for worse.
One thing you missed - and that I missed initially - is that one of the dragons has a cutie mark.
Again: dragons now have cutie marks. The only reason we can't confirm if it's a one-off or not is that we never see the correct flank of the other two, but this is absolutely now something.
That episode is absolutely crazy both in how it just casually drops massive story spoilers and also makes zero sense what so ever.
Seeing how often they try to avoid having continuity in the first place, yes?
Nothing is safe to eat anywhere in faerie lands. That's faerie 101, people!
5752769
The odd thing is that it doesn't really look like a cutie mark, but more like a decorated scale in the position a cutie mark would be in. As such I'm not sure what to make of it.
I would hope that the characters earned their wilderness survival badges after literally surviving in the wilderness.
Apparently the official position is that even though Netflix may be postponing the release of Make Your Mark chapters from the original projected release dates (I assume, given how slowly the episodes have been dripping out), that won't stop Hasbro from making money from its YouTube channel.
Too bad the five-minute runtime forced them to abandon it almost immediately.
It was dragonfire.