Shopping for makeup is easier than shopping for clothes: Femboy Training Log Part 1 of ??? · 4:59am Mar 23rd, 2023
I had a pony story in the works that I wanted to get out before BABSCon, but I've been far too swamped with work to write it. So figure I'd entertain you all with a real life story instead.
You all may or may not know that I've been teaching myself how to wear makeup and dress femininely for the past year or so. It's been a slow learning process, trying to gain courage that I still don't quite have yet.
I have to consider myself lucky to be embarking on this journey now. I'm financially independent, my mom supports my clothing choices, I live in the most socially liberal place in the US, and I got some lucky feminine traits (I have pretty thick and lush hair, I have a sorta-hourglass figure, and my Adam's apple is small). I guess I'm kinda spoiled to say that the most judgmental person was (and is) the self-critical voice inside my head. But you know you're safe when you walk into your local Ulta and 1/3 of the customers buying makeup are men, haha. And though I succumbed to my usual social awkwardness in the store, I was treated just like any other customer.
Next step was clothes, though. I'd been buying skirts and blouses online but I'd have to wait a few days to get them and it always felt draining to sift through thumbnails and not to touch the actual product. Even if online is cheaper, I love the surprises you find walking through a brick and mortar store. Something you like might be right there in the window; something you would never have actively searched for.
I think it's safe to say that these days, there's a bigger percentage of men who wear makeup than men who wear women's clothes. At the very least, there's a bigger stigma.
But this past weekend, I finally decide to take the step and walk in to Marshall's alone. I circle the women's section at least ten times, taking refuge in the men's department to catch my breath and regain my nerve. There's only women shopping in the women's section (of course--though strangely there are some women shopping in the men's section. Why is the converse not true? Curious to know your takes.)
I feel like a pervert walking into the women's department, shopping next to women. I feel like I'm violating their space--though in retrospect I probably looked more sus circling the women's department 10 times like I did. I keep circling, my hands white knuckled on the shopping cart handle, for like 30 minutes. I eye a garment 5 yards away that I think might look nice on me and might fit me. ("Might" is the key word here.) I have no idea what size I am in women's sizes. When I'm ready to take the leap, I leave the perimeter of the women's department, swoop in and grab the garment, and hightail the f*** out of there. The "hunter's instinct"--ironically a very masculine way to shop for things.
I didn't try anything on in the store. I still haven't gotten over the fear of having to show the fitting room attendant what I'm about to try. I shudder to imagine what she would think. Maybe I'll magically gain a super saiyan ability to get the exact dimensions of clothes purely by sight. That day at Marshall's, I just took my best guess and put my faith in the store's return policy. Luckily no one seemed bothered my me, and the cashier treated me normally.
After the 20 minute bus ride of suspense, I get home, close all the blinds...and everything fit! (For me the biggest physical bottleneck is my broad shoulders--I have to wear flowy stuff with sleeves to cover them.)
All in all, I didn't buy much but it was a success. I didn't realize how empowering it feels to shop in both the men's and the women's section. Imagine you go into a clothing store and an invisible force field of social norms keeps you out of 50% of the shop's floor space. Why not have the freedom to choose from 80% of all the options? (the other 20% is the kids' section--unless you're Mafuyu Hoshikawa, that's probably off limits to all adults 
).
"If it fits and you like you it, wear it." That's a motto I'm striving to live by. Maybe one day I'll be able to show with what I wear.
I'll probably still freak the hell out next time I go to the store to buy women's clothes. But maybe I'll be a little less scared. As Fluttershy would say, baby steps. 
Next challenge--going out in public wearing said clothes...! 
I'll tell you my reason for buying men's pants; usable pockets.
I'd definitely reccomended getting a sewing tape measure. It's fairly easy to measure yourself with one and it'll be a lot easier knowing what sizes will fit you.
Hey, good for you!
Nah fam, it's Namekians that have the ability to zap perfectly-fitting clothes onto people. Once you've got your wardrobe, go read up on DBZ lore.
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Ironically, my reason for carrying a purse or fanny pack: phones and wallets and keys too big for pockets
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I do and I know all my measurements, but sizing conventions vary from garment to garment. Also “bust size” and “hip size” don’t have much meaning for me. Sometimes you have to just guess.
experiencing jealousy so intense I can't even come up with a comedically self-deprecating way to express it! :B
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Obviously the best solution is to grow a bust.
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And have good hips
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Honestly, same. I don't know if it's insensitive of me to say that I also feel jealousy in that regard. I'm also tall, broad shouldered, I feel jealous that other internet-celebrity femboys (not naming names) will always have a physical advantage dressing femininely over someone like me...simply because of pure genetic luck. Everyone has their own journey and I of all people know how hard it is to try new things. But we can only do what makes us happy, and that's what I try to do.
5719500
Hmmm, I've never grown that before. Though I am currently growing a dragon tree in a pot that I water once a week--is the care similar? How often should I fertilize? Is frost protection required?
Also tangentially related but just funny:
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I agree, always have good quality, fresh rose hips when preparing rose hip tea
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okay but this is a very healthy way of expressing your feelings :O I think you're doing just fine!