Post-Retirement Thoughts and Feelings · 2:51am Nov 3rd, 2022
So I up and called it a day a few months ago after struggling for ages and ages to try and come back as a writer, and silently updated the account name to make mention of that. That's not going to be changed, as even months away from writing without the shadow of it over my head haven't done a thing to get me back in my groove, so we'll stamp it out as official at this point.
Originally, I did want to do something similar to what B_25 had done when he bowed out of the writer's game, which was do one final emotional send-off to nearly a decade's-worth of work on this site to bookend things. But, unfortunately, that didn't happen, and my retirement was less of a teary and fond farewell to arms, and was moreso me sustaining a violent injury on the field and being told by my doctor upon regaining consciousness my career was over.
So, to repeat it, Buster Knutt the writer is done and dusted at this point, and there's basically no chance of that guy ever coming back. So what we will have instead is Old Man Buster Knutt telling all the young whippersnappers the plans he had tucked in his drawer for another decade's worth of pony smut before retirement got its big, ugly mitts on him.
The first thing worth mentioning was the DSI series. I regard the redux of that series to be something of a magnum opus of mine. Of course, with it being written by me, its a very rushed, unpolished hunk of iron of a story that definitely needed more than a first draft to reach its full potential. Unfortunately, I lack the attention span to do that, and its why everything I've written for the last seven years has been an unedited first draft. Rereading it and the second one now and again has shown me a lot of its weaknesses and where I'd smooth things out if I had the ability to, but that's neither here nor there at this point.
The redux of the series was intended to be a much less smutty venture and focus more on romance and logical pairings. I say that with a straight face, knowing full well the next mare to feature in that series was Twilight Velvet, but it is what it is. DSI Velvet was supposed to focus more on Velvet's loneliness due to both of her children being fully-grown and her husband having passed many years ago. The emotional crux was meant to revolve around Velvet's happiest memories being a newly-wed and a first time mother, and a somewhat hamfisted attempt to return her to that time from her son, Dusk. I wanted the approach to the sex and the impregnation to lean more into a character aspect rather than just 'uwu mommy dommy preggy weggies' like the original, and that reason is probably why I was as unhappy with that version as I was.
The next thing to be cut from the series would've been a DSI Barb reboot. I know a lot of people enjoyed the original version of this, and I did toil away for quite a while trying to reason why I should and shouldn't have one. The best arguments I could muster for going for a DSI Barb reboot would've been bridging the gap from the psuedo-sibling relationship Barb and Dusk share into a more-committed romantic one. The second argument was legit the fact that it would let me write a scene in which Dusk could huff Barb's massive dragon ass, as he was wont to do in a lot of the stories featuring her. I finally decided on cutting that from the reboot line-up due to it overstuffing the series and tagging on a little too much impregnation for my liking. Bet you never thought you'd hear me of all people saying that, huh?
The next cut from the series was a DSI Luna reboot. This one mostly got the axe because Dusk and Luna don't exactly have the closest connection out of the cast, even less so than Barb. And if I felt Barb was a stretch, you weren't gonna catch me dead pulling a muscle trying to get Luna knocked up this time around. I do love Luna, don't get me wrong, she's always been one of my favourite characters to write, especially in Over the Moon. But there was a time and a place for her inclusion and this, to me, didn't seem to be it.
The final entry for the DSI reboot was going to be DSI Celestia, which would've been new ground for the series, but not really for my other works. If Dusk was going to knock up his actual mom, he was 100% going to knock up his surrogate one, too. Celestia's story would've had immortal partnership be a large crutch in the blossoming romance between the two of them. Again, holding myself back from simply making the entire fic be 'uwu dommy mommy preggy weggies', I needed to fuse that connection between them from more realistic anchor-points.
Original plans for DSI Celestia did feature much less sex than the previous storylines, mostly focusing on the emotion aspect of it, similar to Burying the Hatchet, but I decided that if impregnation was in the title of the series, then it had to be a major part of the story. Unsurprisingly, DSI Celestia was going to feature lactaction and ass-worship as its main sexual focus, as if Dusk wasn't gonna get to huff Barb's big ass, then he was gonna make up for it with Celestia's.
The wrap up for the series was going to be me betraying my intentions a little bit with making the series much less fetish-focused, as the entire focus of the final story was simply going to be a pregnant orgy with Cadance, Gleam, Velvet, and Celestia. I've received many requests to do a follow-up to the impregnation stuff with pregnancy and I'd never gotten around to it, so this was going to be me popping the cork on that one, so to speak. But, sadly, it never saw the light of day as the light in my eyes died out.
The DSI series progressing and wrapping was really the only ironed-out plotline I'd concocted in my planning phases, but ideas for one-off, much more fetishy fics were omnipresent in this head of mine. One of my biggest weaknesses as a writer is continuing multi-chapter stories, as I start off with a burning passion for the idea, and then within a few weeks fizzle out and get bored with it. Its happened with basically every multi-chapter story I've ever written, if I didn't ram it into the ground from a lack of prior planning first.
That weakness of mine lead me to start doing series where the sexual scenario was a one and done, with the possibility of a sequel later down the line. The two biggest ones I had in mind were going to feature the CMC and the Young Six. My previous works had featured the CMC before, and they're some of the works I'm most proud of, but I wanted to take another crack at them through my own lens rather than that of a commissioned one. I.E, focus more on impregnation, cumflation, and my usual set of kinks. Not only were the CMC planned to make a return, but Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were also slated to get their own rolls in the hay with Dusk.
The Young Six was essentially going to be me ripping off Some Leech's excellent series following Anon plowing his way through all of them, but with Dusk instead. The focus on the Young Six was also going to allow me to lean into more MxM stuff in my work, with folks like Gallus and Sandbar spruced inbetween the usual romps with the gals like Smoulder and Yona.
Other ideas that floated around in a semi-solid capacity was a sequel to The Queen's Mercy, which I wrote when I first came back on the other account. That was intended to feature Thorax and Pharynx, again leaning into the MxM aspect between scenes with Chrysalis. The sequel was also going to lean heavily on an a piece of missed potential from the original, which was not utilising Chrysalis' shapeshifting abilities. The plan was to make it much longer and much darker than the original. Focusing on Dusk years after the first one, having completely given up mentally and mostly being something of a husk. He'd spend most of his time breeding with Chrysalis and other changelings to increase the Hive's numbers, with Chrysalis occasionally 'rewarding' his good behaviour by shapeshifting into his friends and family for sex.
The shapeshift scenes were going to feature Celestia, Twilight Velvet, Cadance, and the Mane Six, with them being 'played' by other Changelings while Chrysalis watched. The overall plotline of the story was going to feature Thorax and Pharynx having sex with Dusk in secret to feed on his Alicorn power to strengthen themselves up enough to overthrow Chrysalis and set him free. The reason why that one was shelved for as long as it was ended up being due to me worrying it might get a bit too dark and hopeless to still be sexy, and the heavier focus on MxM scenes not being what my fanbase followed me to see. If there was one fic I do wish I could've written before losing my fire, it was definitely this one.
The last major series I ironed out was a dragon-centric one. This was probably the most fetish-focused out of all of them, probably stacking up with Distracting Derriere as my most cumbrain works. It was going to feature Barb, Ember, and Smoulder in their own stories with Dusk, and said stories would basically just be about 5k of dubcon ass-worship, exhibitionism, impregnation, and cumflation each. Barb was going to get her turn in front of a crowd in Ponyville, Smoulder's being in front of the school assembly, and Ember getting it in front of her dragon court. Debated doing a fourth and final one in the series that was going to be another pregnant orgy where the girls are all cumbrained into submissiveness, but that one was up in the air, honestly.
All in all, I think I had a lot of ideas I'd have really liked doing throughout the months if I hadn't had my drive die out like a candle in the wind. I'd give my right arm to have the work ethic of Some Leech and be able to crank out one story every week, but it just wasn't to be unfortunately. I hope this little journal entry has given you a decent-enough mental image of what these stories would've been so you can 'enjoy yourself' with them in one way or another. Maybe I'll get struck by lightning in the coming weeks and regain my writing prowess, but unless that happens, this journal entry is probably the most writing you guys are gonna get from me.
In one way, I'm extremely sorry to have to let you all down like this. On the other, I'm eternally grateful for you all being here over these years and financially supporting my endeavours. I loved every minute of working with you all, and I hope you feel the same. I'll still be around, don't worry, but I'm just not going to be working anymore. And hey, if anyone wants to pick up the mantle of the ideas presented here and carry the torch, go right ahead. I feel the best thing a writer can do is inspire those around them, and I hope I've done just that.
Toodle-pip, gang 
We'll always have a pedestal to place you on, in the pantheon of legendary smut authors.
Cheers,
I'm going to miss your work Old Man. Hopefully you stick around and judge us.
You bet your sweet ass that I will take your Dusk x CMC commission and see if anyone else would like to pick it up. And if not? I'll do it myself. In your honour.
You were one of my greatest inspirations when it came to writing smut. While it’s sad to know these ideas will not come from your hand, I’m sure someone will pick them up and carry where you left up. Rest well, old man. You’ve earned it!
I loved the original DSI stories and I loved the new ones just as much. I'm sad to see you go and we all burn out sooner or later right? I'm glad you said that we can pick up the mantle because you know a few people are going to do that immediately hehe. GG's mate it was fun while it lasted ❤️
I’m glad we got to have the time with you that we did, BK! Your writings have actually provided considerable inspiration for my own forays into the lustful side of things. I adored the way you depicted your characters, the raw passion and desire, mixed with some lovely banter here and there. You’ve definitely left a mark on me and I wish you nothing but good fortune, my friend!
That one with the changlings did indeed sound the most dark, but interesting.
Its really sad to see you go man.
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Thanks, gang. You guys are the best
You should never feel like you are letting people down if you are not writing, it should be first and foremost because you want to do it and haveing fun while doing it.
Have a nice day sir 
Damn, that celestia one sounded amazing, Shame we're unlikely to ever see it :(
Yeah bud, your stories will always keep you as a legend on this site! Thanks for the memories.
tl;dr
new DSI when?
You've written a ton of good pony smut, and that's not a bad legacy to leave behind if you ask me.
Godspeed dude
Welp.
Sucks to see you go, but do what you need to do and good luck.
Farewell, Space Cowboy.
Retired or not, you've climbed your way to the highest tiers of clopfic authors even if you didn't get to write everything you wanted to before terminal burnout hit you. It's a retirement well-earned, even if you had more planned for the future. Every fiction writer has a pile of ideas they simply don't have the time or the motivation to flesh out and write; some ideas inevitably take priority while the remainder gets pushed back further and further. You and I are no exception to this, just like every artist worth their salt has plenty of WIPs they don't plan on finishing. Even Leech can't write out every idea he comes up with, though that's also because he churns out commissions...
Along with Leech, Shakes, and many of the other talented writers on this site, you're one of my main inspirations for getting into this whole clopfic writing business a couple of years ago, and for that, I'll always be grateful. It helped me rediscover a passion for writing that I thought I'd lost the drive for back in community college once the research papers crushed every ounce of it out of me.
So, yeah...fuck burnout. But your portfolio of work is still something to be proud of. (Well, I wouldn't go around putting it on any job applications, but you know what I mean.)
I hope all is well