Due in no small part to the demographics of my neighborhood, I have made a number of friends --

-- isn't that just the perfect way to open an incredibly racist statement? 'I need to immediately establish that I have friends from this group, which theoretically entitles me to say everything which comes next'? --

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Homogenous
Homeopathy
Homeostasis
Homo sapiens
Homogenized
Homograph
Homonym
Homologous
Homozygote
Homophone

Normally, I would be dearly and deeply hoping this turned out to be the point-proving sort of hoax.

*patiently waits for con reveal*
*keeps waiting*

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The sequel claims Andy Dick would be hired as an officer by the NYPD.

Y'know, of all the possible ways the movie could have shot all its dubious credibility in the first twenty minutes, that wouldn't have been the one I predicted.

Oh, and they just claimed airborne homing shark with a grudge. So now we're ripping off Jaws, only with flight and airplane-tracking shark GPS. Plus the background weather forecast called for twelve inches of shark accumulation.

This is art.

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I pay for a surprising number of things using cardboard strips and bottlecaps.

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That should really be all I have to say in order to begin full distribution of the pain shipment, but I had the privilege misfortune of seeing the preview version in action and so I feel the need to go into detail. Just to make sure it hurts more.

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This question comes up occasionally: if we put everything on a calendar, what's the order? It's been long enough since the last answer (with a few new additions) for a fresh one to be required. So I put the below on the Group, but I'm also posting it here for everyone else. This is not Group-exclusive material.

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...a man possessing the intellectual ability of the average gnat when it came to foreseeing the consequences of his own so-called moral code began a career of taking mass murderers and placing them in a situation where they could basically escape at will and kill even more people, at which point he would catch them and temporarily place them back in the cardboard prison so they could do it all over again, only with even more victims.

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In days of yore -- about two years ago -- I was a moderate devotee of Amazon's Blu-Ray DVD trade-in store. Every so often, my local libraries would hold We Have Too Much Crap On Our Shelves sales which, inevitably, would degenerate on the last day into Everything You Can Stuff Into This Here Bag, One Dollar. I would typically use that last day to not only pick up stuff I wanted to read, but also hit the movie shelf with everything I could reasonably stuff without any electrons sharing orbits.

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I had promised to do a favor today -- one which involved waiting in line (standing, briefly sitting, trying not to verge into fuming) for over two hours. Knowing I was pretty much out of data on my mobile plan for the billing cycle, I made sure my Kindle was loaded before I left: battery charge, reading material, music -- and a new game, one which I'd gotten for free from Amazon's app store. What with one thing and

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If I post a new story or segment which doesn't completely svck, there's a chance I'll pick up a fresh follower or two before the thing falls off the New list. For Princesses Can't Cook, that new arrival number (as of this writing) was thirteen. And typically when I get a new follower, I'll mouse over their icon and take a quick peek at them. How long they've been on the site, if they have any submitted stories of their

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