Being Trapped in Stone is DULL!

by Jioplip

Shortness is Regrettably Dull

Ugh, good evening everypony, ouch, I am Discord, though you should know that by now.

Now you might be wondering why I'm in apparent pain, and you see the simple reason is irresponsibly heavy rainfall and a VERY irresponsible Pegasus Guard, who didn't bother to check where he was going and ended up crashing into me, toppling me completely over.

But enough of my problems, I have enough professionalism to work through minor setbacks like this, so on to my personal correspondence for tonight's session.

First, to Diamond from before, I appreciate your enjoyment of our dialogue, and I must say it has been a refreshing change of pace for me as well.

Second, to one Silver Alchemist, I... would prefer not to talk about the platypus incident, but, since you asked I will provide.

You see, in creating the Platypus, I had intended to make a fearsome creature capable of biting off heads, poisoning the unwary, and having the ability to adapt to any environment. What I actually made was an amalgamation of duck and beaver that is... mostly harmless, if left alone at any rate.

Needless to say, I've endeavored to not repeat my mistake, aiming for FAR more outlandish goals ever since. I see it now plain as day that I was being far too realistic in my projections for the Platypus.

Well, now that correspondence is done for now, I suppose now it's time to wonder HOW CELESTIA IS DISCIPLINING HER GUARDS if that Pegasus still hasn't reported his little 'accident' even though it's been three hours and somepony should be out here to fix the orientation of Celestia's greatest masterpiece.

I'll have to make a mental note to personally seek revenge on the Guard Captain, what was his name? Glimmer Shins? Something like that.

Anyway, I've been trying to scry out of my prison, since nothing's happening in the garden, but unfortunately the Elements have a tight lock on my prison, and all I've been able to get is a couple of inter-dimensional radio stations, but still, you can't argue with Chris de Burgh.

Ah well, tomorrow is a week and two days since I was imprisoned, and a Tuesday at that, such a horrid day.

I don't think I've ever had a happy Tuesday since then, and I doubt I ever will again, truly is Tuesday a plague and menace on my mind, I should just remove Tuesdays altogether, and I don't mean just shortening weeks down to six days, since then Tuesday would still be there, just disguised as a different day every week.

No, I'd like to place a permanent memory blanking effect on Tuesdays so that I at least don't have to remember what I had to go through each week it came around.

At least I'm better of than Luna, the poor dear had to endure a great deal worse on the moon, I should know, since two-hundred years ago my scrying was actually functional enough to pierce her Moony prison.

It wasn't pretty, she was trapped in a small cubed enclosure made of solid rock, barely big enough for her perpetually shrunken filly form, and worst of all, she was in there sobbing her eyes out, no doubt feeling betrayed and confused by the situation she found herself forced into.

Now I just want to make something clear, just because I felt for her doesn't mean I'm going soft or anything, Luna was my favourite sibling and I could clearly emphasize with her position, besides, I helped get her trapped in there in the first place.

Grah! Now unfortunately I will have to leave you now, as I cannot tolerate this annoying PAIN and talk civilly any longer!

Arrivederci!

Author's Note:

Admit it, some of you were waiting for that line.

Also, sorry for the short chapter, but I think I'm starting to develop a plot-line for this story, and I needed this chapter for setup mostly.

Comments

[Changeling-Drone]

so discord how was luna changed into nightmare moon?

[Hekate Sketch]

Discord, don't you have something in your chaos arsenal that can at least make it easier to be trapped in stone? and besides, at least your not quantum locked, like weeping angels.