Episode Two: The Moron's Creed
“This idea is just stupid.”
“I know.”
“You’d have to be stupid to try.”
“I know.”
Lyra sighed. “There’s just no convincing you that this is a very bad idea?”
I shrugged in response. “I’m full of bad ideas.”
-----
Bonds Beyond Species
A My Little Pony: FiM Fanfiction
As presented by Yasahiro
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit, fan based story. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is the property of Hasbro, reimagined by Lauren Faust. Please support the official release.
-----
We were currently standing in the Steelpeak Skydock. I had to admit that I didn’t expect anything like that. From what I have seen in Equestria, my opinion on their level of technology was quite low. But this...
It resembled a normal port rather than what I had expected. Blimps with long gondolas resembling ships attached to them by ropes. The ships were also docked with ropes. I could see giant propeller engines attached to it, pointed backwards. According to Lyra, the engines were steam powered. I whistled at that. For a world that relies heavily on magic, they sure knew their steampunk.
“So how do you plan to get onto the Zeppelin? It’s not like you can just ask the guards to let you inside.”
I calmly waved my hand at this, “You will see, I’m a master of stealth.”
Lyra perked up at this, “Really?”
“No.”
She facehoofed the very moment I said that and grumbled something about moronic humans under her breath. I didn’t blame her. This was a very bad idea that could potentially backfire in a very dangerous manner.
Sadly, I don’t feel like spending two weeks to get to Silvercrest.
You can call me crazy, but ask yourselves this: How crazy IS crazy?
The answer is: very. But, when living in a world of technicolor ponies and mythical creatures, it’s normal. At least I didn’t break out into song... yet. I’m going off topic now. I followed Lyra with my eyes as she went to pay for her ticket. I sighed and turned my stare towards the Zeppelin, thinking about a way to get onto it. They had to load cargo, baggage, or something onto it. I looked a bit more to the left and noticed a huge pile of boxes waiting to be loaded onto the ship.
If only there was a way to get onto that ship. I could feel an idea forming in my head, yet I was uncertain as to what should I do. Maybe use a disguise?
I closed my eyes for a second, opened them, and looked around. Nobody was nearby.
I should concentrate and stop being stupid. The boxes should be big enough to even allow someone like me to get in.
I swept my hand on the lid on one of the boxes and tried to lift it. It wasn’t nailed down or anything. Most importantly, it was empty. Perfect! I ripped off a fragile label from a nearby box and put it on the one I had chosen. Lifting the lid, I got into my ticket inside the ship and smiled.
I am a genius.
-----
I am an idiot.
The one thing I didn’t account for was that they would place other crates on top of the one I was in, which is exactly what happened. I should have predicted that.
Note to self, never make plans on the fly. I thought to myself as I tried to find a way out of this situation. Except me there was nothing else in the box. I had a butterfly-knife, my clothes... And my intelligence. If I had a paperclip or duct tape, I could’ve easily made something.
I kicked in frustration at a wall of the box and then an idea hit me. I can kick my way out! I kicked again. From the sound of it, there was another box on that side. The other two walls sounded the same. I hit a jackpot with the last one, nothing but air on that side. I grinned and braced myself before beginning to megaton kick my way to freedom.
Ten minutes later, I realized that Griffons made durable boxes. However, I finally managed to make a small opening. It was a very good sign for me as I could already feel that I was running out of oxygen. Two more kicks and the wall was off, but my joy was cut off by a creaking sound I heard above me. A crack appeared on the top of the box and the roof was slowly being pushed inward.
Oh, crap. I threw myself out of the box. Said container collapsed inward from the weight of the crates on top of it. I could feel my heart beating heavily. If nine out of ten accidents happen in the house, the remaining one happens on zeppelins.
The noise was loud enough to alert anyone in the cargo bay. I could hear footsteps, or rather clawsteps. It sounded like a griffon was coming. I had to hide. I stood up and went to the crates on the opposite side from where I could hear him coming. I pressed my back to the boxes to have them block his line of sight and waited.
And several seconds later the steps stopped. “Damn it to Tartarus! I told these feather-brains to put the fragile boxes on TOP of the other crates, not the other way around.” I leaned out of my cover to see the griffon inspecting the shattered pieces of my previous residence.
He was unaware of my presence, for now, and I decided to use that to my advantage. As I assessed my situation, I realized that the only way out was where the griffon was. I had to use all the knowledge had I gained from stealth games.
I tiptoed behind the griffon, my back being supported by nearby boxes. I held my breath. Be vewy, vewy quiet... I was several meters away from the exit, when I heard a rattle coming from the griffon’s direction. I immediately jumped into the closest opening between the boxes, hoping that I was not seen.
“At least it won’t all fall apart now.” The griffon muttered under his breath. I could hear him walking back towards the entrance to the cargo bay and I prayed to whatever gods that existed here that he did not look in my direction.
It seems the gods were on my side as he just walked past me up to the upper deck. I released the breath I didn’t know that I was holding. Thank you gods of random ninjas, if you exist. I let several minutes pass to ensure that I didn’t bump into the griffon when I left. Lyra is waiting, let’s go.
I climbed up the stairs. Other passengers were talking with each other or simply resting, most of them griffons. I looked for that green and white mane among the sea of other colors. I spotted her leaning on the railing with her head in between her forelegs.
I dusted my shirt off and casually walked over to her, one hand on the railing. “So, how is the flight?”
She turned towards me, surprise etched on her face. “Where were you?! I’ve been worrying myself sick. I thought I had left without you!” I was taken aback by the sheer emotions in her voice. Her lip was trembling, her eyes watering. “I thought something had happened to you.”
I crouched slightly and hugged her. “Hey, I’m sorry. That was stupid of me.” I didn’t even think about how she might feel. I forgot that she had studied humans for years. I closed my eyes and thought.
Didn’t she tell me that her roommate didn’t want to let her go to the Griffon Mountains only to study what she thought was a possible link to humans? If she came back home without me, her roommate would probably think that Lyra made up the whole thing or worse. Why am I made of stupid!?
“I promise you, I won’t do anything so stupidly dangerous.” That sealed it. I am a man of my word, always doing whatever I can to fulfil a promise. That’s also the reason I don’t promise many things, but this was important enough.
I released her from the hug of my hopefully manly arms and looked her in the eyes. I smiled, “Now, we have the whole flight to enjoy ourselves. What do you want to do?”
I could see a smile forming on her face as she attempted to wipe her eyes with her forelegs. “I heard they have a nice buffet at the stern.” I grinned in response.
“Let’s go!” I pointed dramatically towards the front of the ship.
“The stern is the rear of the ship.” Lyra pointed out. I spun around on my foot to point in the right direction.
“That’s where I pointed!”
-----
I had to admit, the buffet really looked nice. It served practically everything, ranging from hay sandwiches for pony tourists through grilled fish and ending with sushi.
Man, I sure do love sushi!
It seemed like we would finally be able to take a break from everything that happened to us and enjoy life. We sat at one of the free tables, holding plates with tons of food stacked on top of them. I was just going to try my first sushi since I came to Equestria, yet it seemed that our lunch would be interrupted.
I experienced the worst possible thing.
I forgot about the soy sauce.
I shook my head at this little annoyance and decided to ask my cute companion about this predicament. “Lyra, I think I forgot about the soy sauce.”
Lyra blinked, “Oh, griffons don’t really think of it as something essential. I don’t think you will find any on this ship.”
I could feel my eyelid twitching slightly. I looked down at my sushi. Sushi without any soy sauce. A thing that cannot be. I closed my eyes. My hands were brought together as I said quietly, “I will fix this crime the instant I get some soy sauce, Sushi Kami-sama.”
I was contemplating flipping the table, but when you are on a ship full of griffons, it is not worth the troubles. That’s why you should at least pray that this heresy will be forgiven. I ate my sushi in silence afterwards, with Lyra giving me an odd look.
“It’s a matter of principle, Lyra.” I said after I finished my meal.
She shook her head. “Kaisei, are all humans that... weird?”
“Depends on where you look. There are weirder ones.” I attempted to roll my eyes in different directions to emphasize my sentence. From the laugh I got from Lyra, I succeeded in my efforts.
The rest of the lunch progressed in a relaxed manner. I used this to empty my mind of all thoughts and analyze all that had happened to me. One of the most important questions of the entire journey came back to me.
“Lyra, how does magic work?”
That stopped her mid bite of her hay sandwich. A question like that out of nowhere would surprise anyone. She swallowed her food and thought for a bit. “I didn’t focus on theory when I was studying it in school, but I think I can explain it in laypony’s terms.”
She took a deep breath. “Magic is the action of focusing and controlling the thaumaturgical energies that exist in any living being through a carefully made spell matrix. Spell matrices are what shapes the raw thaumaturgic power into what we call spells. Unicorns have larger amounts of thaumaturgical energy than other creatures and our horns are what allow us to create spell matrices in our minds. It also serves as a way to use the thaumaturgical energy that is already freely flowing through the world, though the usual way of performing spells relies mostly, if not completely, on our personal energy reservoirs.” Her horn lit up with green aura as one of the napkins floated above our table for a demonstration. “However there is also another type of magic that focuses on the use of magical symbols we call ‘runes’. I didn’t really study this particular branch of magic, but apparently runes are parts of spell matrices manifesting in the physical world. It enables the use of the energy already existing in the world, though a unicorn can serve as the energy source him or herself. This is one of the basic runes that stands for Strength.” She closed her eyes, letting the glow of her horn intensify. A small mark was drawn in green light on the napkin. “A small change in the runes already placed can change the spell’s effect...” To illustrate this, one of the lines in the symbol disappeared “such as this, changing the rune of strength into a rune of lighting, and drawing them takes too much time for this type of magic to be used for everyday tasks, that’s why nopony bothers with learning more about it. I only learned the basics during my... projects.” The napkin floated back onto the table as lines of light faded and Lyra took a breath after her speech.
I stayed silent after this, contemplating what I had just heard. This could prove useful in the future, I just knew it. I rose my eyes towards Lyra. “Would I be a bother if I wanted to buy some books on runic magic?”
She shook her head. “No, not at all. But it will have to wait until we get back to Equestria. It is hard to find a book about magic in griffon cities. We also don’t know if Gilda is in Silvercrest and we should save our money for now, at least until we know what to expect.” I could feel her stare on me. It was strong. “What’s with the sudden interest?”
“Oh, you know. I’m just curious.”
She kept her stare for several more seconds until she gave up and shrugged. “I guess that’s only fair, with all the questions I asked you about humans.”
We finished our meal. I stood up first and walked around the table, giving Lyra a slight bow and extending my hand. “May I help you up, ma’am?” I said with a grin.
Lyra gave me a grin of her own and accepted. “Yes, thank you good sir.”
We chuckled a bit before going back to the upper deck.
-----
There was something relaxing about watching the clouds fly by. Except this time, I was doing it on a Zeppelin and we were going next to the clouds instead of looking at them from the ground. I never bothered looking at the sky like that back on Earth.
I took a look at my green companion.
Then again, nothing here was like what I had on Earth. It was... different. Not worse, not better, just different. They don’t have high level technology, but they have magic. They don’t rely on uncertain forecasts, they control the clouds.
This was an unexpected change, but one I gladly welcomed in my life. There were times where I missed what I had before, yet it was to be expected.
“Kaisei?”
I turned towards Lyra. She was staring into the sky.
“Yes?”
“What do you think about this world?” She asked me with hesitation in her voice.
I took a deep breath. “Well, the air here is definitely fresher than the air in my world.” I smiled, “I like it here. By human standards, it would be odd, and yet I like it.”
My eyes were half-closed, I felt calm, “The colors seem more lively and, what is most important, most of the time you’re safe.”
At that moment, I heard several sounds resembling clangs before the ship swayed a bit. I immediately grasped the railing to steady myself and Lyra backed away to keep herself from falling. We heard a scared scream from the other side of the ship. It was immediately followed by a shout.
“Congratulations! Y’all have just received the privilege of meeting the Blackwing Pirates!”
Only one thought was on my mind at that time.
DAMN YOU MURPHY’S LAW!
----
Most of the passengers were running away from pirates, yet Lyra and I ran towards them. It seemed like every human had the mentality to run towards whatever is happening. That was a trait that Lyra shared with me.
Taking in the situation was the very first thing we did once we were close enough. Flying next to us was a smaller blimp. It had two times more propeller engines attached to it, cannons could be seen jutting out of the gondola. Its balloon was also colored black and had a huge image of a griffon skull over a pair of crossed bones.
Yup, they were the pirates. Of the sky. Sky Pirates. Now I’ve seen everything.
From the other ships, griffons shot at us with cutlasses and sabres in their claws. They immediately forced any griffon that tried to escape back onto the ship. They were bringing the gondolas of our ships together by attaching hooks on ropes to the metal railing of our ship. We were being taken over and it was working damn well.
One of the griffons landed near me with a sickening grin on its face.
Luckily for me, we were near the railing now.
“This. Is. SPARTA!” I shouted into the griffon’s face. He became momentarily confused as he tried to understand just what the hell did I yell. Then I kicked him in the chest.
He fell over the railing and started screaming as he spiraled out of control. It took him a moment to remember that he had wings and could recover from that. He flew back up, an angry scowl on his face. Of course, in my opinion, I couldn’t have let such a chance be wasted. Just as he tried to dive towards me, a green blast struck him head on. I turned towards Lyra and noticed her horn was releasing green steam for few seconds.
“We have to run!”
“Where? Does this Zeppelin even have any sky-lifeboats?”
“Oh, it does, but my griffons already took care of that.” An unfamiliar voice said behind us. We turned around and were faced with the scariest looking griffon I have ever seen. Not that I have seen many, though.
He stood on his hind legs, a massive, two-handed sword. Its shape resembled that of a scimitar, but bigger, the blade being far wider. The griffon himself had black feathers, yet a small patch of grey was on his chest, spreading wider until it touched his shoulders, ending at his neck. His head was mostly black, except for the top of it turning into white and tipped with red. On one of his eyes, he had an eyepatch.
He was also taller than me and, by the looks of it, stronger.
He put a claw underneath my chin and raised it, making me look him in the eyes.
“Ya don’t look like a pony, unlike yer green friend.” He smirked and took away his claw from my face. I was about to respond when something yanked my hood off from behind.
“And he don’t look like a griffon, capt’n!” said the griffon that took off my hood. I glared at the captain and growled out my response.
“That’s because I’m a human.” Welp, there goes the disguise. Still, it didn’t make any difference now.
It turned out it did. “A human?!” The captain took a step back and laughed. Some of the griffons in his crew that were nearby stopped what they were doing and also laughed.
“A human ya say?” He grinned and took a look at me. “Now that ya said that... Ya kinda look like what them legends say.” He turned to his crew and yelled out. “Oi, boys. This here be a real human!”
Some of them slowly gathered around us, staring at me with interest. “Ya look a bit lost, boy. Ah heard there not be many of ya left these days.”
I looked around, with so many griffons, we didn’t have any chance of escaping. “That’s true. What’s it to you?”
He smiled at me in what I can only describe as a mocking manner. “Ya seem kinda confused, ah can help ya.” He made a clicking sound with his tongue. “Allow me to explain. Help me out, crew!” I swear, I could hear an accordion start playing somewhere.
“Oh boy, capt’n is going to sing a sky shanty”
Pirates bursting into a song. If I wasn’t crazy earlier, this is it.
The first to begin was the captain, his bass voice spreading through the air.
“Here you are, standing tall, driven to a wall, wary of the squall, one might even say you're stuck.” He raised his sword and let it rest on one of his shoulders. “Well, I don't wanna drawl, but I would like to note that you're in luck”
He started beating his wings, rising into the air above us until he caught one of the lines connecting the gondola to the balloon and looked down at us from it. “You’ve been found by the griffon that rules these skies, so forget about your marefriend’s eyes.” He pointed his cutlass to the side. “First mate, introduce me to them, please!”
“Aye aye, Captain Stump!” We heard a female voice respond and we turned towards her. I could hear Lyra’s gasp.
“That’s Gilda...” She whispered to me.
“He’s the big and scary,” One of the male griffons surrounding us joined in, spreading his wings. “Elegant and feath’ry.”
Just as they finished this verse, the male griffon switched with another one. This one dragged his claw across his cutlass “Fear inspiring,”
Another one, clearly younger than others. “Years ‘till retiring,”
Another griffon landed next to us and grabbed Lyra’s saddlebags, throwing them up in the air and catching them as they fell down “Looting, stealing,”
This time, an oddly clean-looking griffon started singing alone. He looked like someone that was more used to an easier life. “Feather preening”
This time, they all joined in together for this line. “Undisputed Master of the Skies!”
I couldn’t resist commenting on that, yet somehow, unintentionally, I made my next comment rhyme with their last line, as if this world was getting to me. “Oh, guys...”
He landed on the roof above us and pointed at himself with his free claw. “That’s me!”
The two first male griffons from the song and the thief responded together. “Tis he!”
“That’s me!”
This time it was Gilda, the clean one and the kid. “Tis he!”
“That’s me!”
All together. “Tis he!”
The captain chuckled. “Okay, okay.” Just as I thought it was the end, he continued. “I’m a griffon pirate pioneer and these are my brave buccaneers, all of whom were once lone souls like you.”
All at once, “It’s true!”
The younger one jumped out, “He rescued us!”
Without dropping a beat, the one with the cutlass took a step towards us. “He saved our rumps!”
Gilda continued, “For that we owe our lives to Stump, and assuming he doesn’t kill you...”
The one with the cutlass stabbed it into the wall, next to my head as all of them sung together, “You will owe him too!”
The captain started laughing as he dropped onto the floor next to me and placed his claw on my shoulder. “Kill them? No, no. At least not this dangerous, useful human.”
I knocked his claw off my shoulder. “Claws off” I growled out.
He faked a look of hurt before breaking back into the grin. “Anyway.” He jumped and started spinning in the air as he flew upwards. He stopped himself in the air and looked towards the sky, “Here we are on a ship, moving at quite a clip through the ever-changing skies.”
Gilda sung the next line, “Come along on a trip,”
She was immediately followed by the clean griffon, “That’s a hint,”
And then came the cutlass one “That’s a tip,”
The one that spread his wings during the very beginning of the song stepped out and finished the verse, “That’s a good advice!”
Captain Stump and Gilda started flying in a circle, each on an opposite side, as they sung together, “In a world that’s full of thunders, to survive you must learn to plunder,”
The Captain dropped with his sword onto the desks next to me, his scimitar cutting through them like it was butter. “Luckily that’s my field of expertise!”
“He’s the best!” Gilda added from above.
The clean griffon and the cutlass one sung in unison, “He’s the roving, heaving,”
I couldn’t help but sing my next words, “We really should be leaving!”
The thief flipped up a knife into the air and caught it. “Weapon-throwing,”
Lyra tried to speak up “We gotta get going!”
The one with the cutlass ripped it out of its resting place and placed it dangerously close next to Lyra. “Pony-slaying,”
She immediately backed up towards me, seeking safety. Anyone would hear the sarcasm in her next sentence, even though fear did a good job of drowning it out, “Ah, I wish we could be staying!”
All of the pirates sung now together, “Undisputed, uncontested, undefeated”
Captain Stump waved his sword in the air before pointing its tip in my direction. “Yeah, you guessed it.”
Once more all together they sung, “Master of the Skies!”
I rolled my eyes and said my own part, “That’s lies!”
The chorus came once more with Captain and the rest of the pirates singing their respective parts.
“That’s me!”
“Tis he!”
“That’s me!”
“Tis he!”
“That’s who?”
“It’s you!”
“Just testing, I knew it’s me!” He finished the song with a loud laughter, the music in the background lasting for several more seconds before it started to quiet down.
The clean one said something, in a small voice, now that the song was done. “Good shanty, capt’n!”
The griffon in question walked towards me, his scimitar laying on his shoulder. “So what do ya say, ya wanna join us?”
I didn’t know I could get crazier than joining into a song started by pirates.
“Yes. But only when the oceans dry, the sun explodes, and you’re lying deep in your grave.”
It turns out that, when a friend of mine gets threatened in the middle of such a song, I do get even crazier. Lyra herself gasped at my statement. When I think about it, I could have said it better.
He squinted his eyes at me. “Ah don’t think ya realize that I’m givin’ ya the chance of yer life. Yer wastin’ yer time with this ‘ere pony.” He glared at me. His scimitar slashed through the air before it embedded itself in the floor before me. “Ah’ll ask just one more time. Will ya join us?”
I could feel a maniacal grin spreading on my face. The adrenaline in my blood stream was making me stupidly brave now, though it didn’t make me do anything I didn’t want to.
“I have a better deal. I challenge you to a duel. If you win against me, I‘ll go with you. However, if I win...” I took a step closer towards him and looked him in the eyes, “You will leave this ship and, if I see you again, I will finish what I started.”
He met my glare with one of his own. Nothing mattered as we were trying to see which one would surrender first in this battle of wills. I wasn’t aware of the eyes of a certain female griffon looking at me with what could be a look of hope.
The captain broke the eye contact first as he once more let his mighty laughter fill the air. He looked down at me with a smirk on his face, “So, hotshot, you wanna fight Captain Stump?”
I narrowed my eyes at him, yet the grin I had on my face turned into a smirk of my own. I believe I skipped the phase of hot rage and went into tranquil fury. As such, I could have appeared calm yet confident.
“Fight you? No, I wanna kill you.”
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This is awesome! Keep up the great work.
I would like some popcorn
Sorry but I didn't notice any references
Remind me to hook Kaisei up with a discounted rate on a Hyperspace Arsenal. . .
Also: ARE YOU CRAZY FILLY?! Runic Magic is absurdly useful!!
2176420
Shh, don't reveal my motives!
Still, when everyone around you doesn't research magic that extensively, it is normal to just use the everyday magic that just needs you to send power and intent. Imagine runes as japanese alphabet. Now add several tens of thousand more symbols, for nearly every word. Any small change in the rune can change the effect of the spell and the results can be disastrous.
Not to mention the time you would need to learn and remember. Unless you had a way to store thousands if not millions of symbols in one small portable thing. If only there was a way...
The 300 reference is obvious and I some parts of the song are familiar
Yes I would love popcorn
2176451
Or if you got absurdly lucky and inherited photographic memory.
Though you would need precise writing skills to go with it.
Are these the kinds of runes that allow for the storage of energy, or at least not becoming useless after a single usage? I read the part about them using the ambient energy in the world, but I wasn't quite sure.
Another question, can strings of Runes be used to create different, more potent or otherwise, effects?
2176492
I like the way you're thinking now, I will tell you that. You're asking questions that I already considered, will be voiced by Kaisei later and shown effects of. Don't worry, everything will be explained but it makes me happy to see readers slowly realizing what I am leading them on.
2176506
I've had a bit of contact with fictional Runic Magicks before, so it's something I tend to question. Eventually you see patterns.
Anyways, I look forwards to it. If Kaisei is successful in learning it, let alone mastering it, his capabilities will greatly improve. And of course Human Nature will push him to try new things with it. Part of the reasons I like Runic Magicks so much;they let you innovate a lot more than with traditional Magicks.
In a fair fight, Kaisei would have his ass kicked against Captain Stump in ten seconds flat. But who said that a pirate duel is about "fairness"?
2176558
Rune magic+ Human nature= teamcovenant.com/w/images/d/d3/Runic-Cannon.png
2177491
Or this-
teamcovenant.com/store/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/R/u/Runic_Armor.jpg
I Wan Sum PopCorn......Wait....I HAS BACON IN THE FRIDGE!!
Be Back In. Jiff
2193375
Yes! I am glad that someone noticed it. Keep up the good work readers!
demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/small/1004/whos-awesome-castro-thinks-highly-of-you-demotivational-poster-1270163016.jpg
McGuyver Reference
DBZ Reference
Looney Toons reference.
Everything is in order, nothing glaring that I noticed off the bat and the song was a nice change of pace.
Allow me to say that I did not see this coming, it was quite refreshing.
Still nothing wrong yet. The story is interesting and charming while not being exactly what I expected.
So many references. I bet nobody even got the DBZ one.
pretty exciting chapter, I hope to see much more of this
Humans are so dumb
I can get away with saying that because I am one
A little too fast but still funny.
Also Lyra, yes ... LYRA IS BEST PONY! Arrr!
I don't like popcorn....
you can put away your pitchforks and torches now
I've watched Ice Age 3 for the couple weeks I've been back home and I totally got that pirate song when they introduce themselves. ^^;
I'm going to cry this is amazing and I love it!
LYRA IS BEST PONEEEE!
Hahaha, the references man!
... all I spotted was 300 //sobs I'm horrible.
Nice job!