you have a wonderful story going here but it almost seems as if someone else wrote the second chapter. either that or it just has yet to be edited. keep up the great work
OK I like this story, I really do, but I had to stop reading it do to some misspelled words, words that were missing, and words that were wrong. Sorry but I can't read this story any farther.
Oh my god I figured it out that's the reason he couldn't Coke with rainbow dash because of the history of humans in equestria it makes so much sense now.ERROR critical malfunction all systems shutting down
Love this chapter it was awesome :D
i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6548575232/h108D0E38/
my jaw hurt after reading this chapter because i could not stop saying awww a truly lovely story
awwwww
nice
you have a wonderful story going here but it almost seems as if someone else wrote the second chapter. either that or it just has yet to be edited. keep up the great work
well actually I changed my style a bit on the second to try and make it more appealing
i really enjoyed this chapter i especially liked the my little dashi reference
2176900 Another great chapter. ANd it seems that you did WAY better grammar wise. THank you. Heh.
the only thing I have against you.. is the fact that you use the wrong "there, their and they're" and you say "hear" instead of "here"
example:
it is over hear: is supposed to be : it is over here!I know it isn't much, the rest is ok. but this really bothers me..
you also need to work on your "you're and your" part...
I've never understood how people can get those wrong..
"Well, I worked as a cook at a couple of !!!restraints!!! actually. this ir so wrong.... "restaurants" is the word you're looking for..
(english is not my first language either)
sorry for being a grammar nazi, it's kind of in my blood.
I hope you mean "wore a veil of the night sky." Otherwise, I keel you for insulting mai waifu.
This story is good and I know I'm late to say this but...
Hoofs ? It's hooves
OK I like this story, I really do, but I had to stop reading it do to some misspelled words, words that were missing, and words that were wrong. Sorry but I can't read this story any farther.
Oh my god I figured it out that's the reason he couldn't Coke with rainbow dash because of the history of humans in equestria it makes so much sense now.ERROR critical malfunction all systems shutting down