• Published 24th Mar 2013
  • 2,954 Views, 108 Comments

Our Guardian Enigma - The Eccentric Mister E

Equestria is in trouble. The fabric of space and time surrounding the world is falling apart, allowing horrible creatures and savages to invade the peaceful world. But a hero has been sent, he is an enigma known as The Wanderer.

  • ...

Just your typical prologue

Nothing quite beats lounging on the surface of a comet as it passed around a sun; perfect way to get a tan. But you wouldn't know about that because you're not the guy who can actually do that. He is known as The Wanderer but his friends call him Long John for the way he can shape his body into whatever form he wants. He can be as tall or as short as he needs to be or stretch any part of his body to incredible lengths. They don't know if that’s his actual name though and if you asked the ladies about that it’s a totally different reason altogether. His favorite and current form is the human one however; he finds it to be more versatile and useful especially with all his little add-ons.

He lounged on the comet, soaking up the rays from the sun as he took a long drag from a strange cigar that glowed green and had smoke that changed colors. He was garbed in black cargo pants with many pockets and a grey, long sleeved shirt that had strange metal armor plates colored like brass on the front, shoulders, arms, and back. His boots had steel toes and came up to his knees under the pants and a belt of brown leather with a big silver buckle that had a W on it. He wore black, finger-less leather gloves that had steel in the knuckles. He also had on a dark brown trench coat almost as long as he was, and he was only 6 feet tall at the moment. The trench coat held within its folds all sorts of devices and useful things he needed or just wanted to have around and had a wide collar.

He blew a smoke ring and smiled as he watched it through reflective sunglasses as it changed colors before floating away into space. His skin was a bronze tan and his face sported a thin mustache and goatee and his straight brown hair was styled back into a small ponytail and it was well-kept. He thought to himself that life couldn't get any better.

"That's where you're wrong bitch!" yelled a voice from nowhere.

The Wanderer started when he heard the voice. He rose up on his elbows and looked around for the source. Suddenly, with a flash of light, a small hummingbird appeared before him. Its wings, feet, and beak were gold and the rest of it was a light brown color. Its eyes glowed a soft yellow.

"Yo what up LJ?" it said as it fluttered around the man's head.

"Hermes?" he asked with a confused look. "What the hell are you doing here?"

The bird stopped in front of his face.

"Come to collect you dude." it said.

The Wanderer sighed. He sat up and took off his glasses revealing eyes with irises that had a multitude of colors that swirled around together. Depending on his mood they would sometimes change into one color and even glow if it was an extreme emotion.

"Seriously?" he asked. "Come on Hermes this is supposed to be my decade off."

"I know I know" replied the bird. "You don't think I feel bad about this? After what you did on that arctic planet you deserve it
man. But this is a big one man. We're in deep and we need you right now. I'm sorry dude really but this is worse than you think."

The Wanderers eyes narrowed as he stared at the bird.

"How big and bad?" he asked.

The bird fluttered closer and was hovering mere inches from his face.

"Category G catastrophe!" he said with a dramatic flair.

The Wanderers eyebrows raised up at these words and his eyes stopped swirling for a moment.

"A Cat-G" he thought, "We haven't had one of those in at least ten millenniums."

He looked down and scratched his chin as he thought about all of it. He had only been on his vacation for a short while; he didn't want to leave it so soon.

He looked back up at the messenger.

"Why me Hermes?" he asked.

The bird twittered and landed on the Wanderer's knee.

"Apparently, you're the only one who can deal with; at least that's what I heard. Everyone else is off dealing with other jobs or just don't meet the requirements. But really LJ? I heard that the Master himself asked for you specifically. There's more to this Cat-G than the Council is letting on."

Now the Wanderer was really surprised and curious. The Master never showed this much interest in anything. He really wanted to know what was going on but Hermes really didn't know and he couldn't deny the will of The Master if he wanted him specifically for the job when he had hundreds more to choose from.

He sighed again and stood up. The little bird flew up and hovered in front of him awaiting a response.

"Well then it seems like I don't have a choice. Guess comet-lounging’ll just have to wait."

He walked over to where he left his hat and sword. The hat was made of a brown material same as his coat with a grey band and had a wide, low brim and the sword looked like a simple cane, as long as his leg. The sheath was black with silver metal at each end and a wide silver band where the hilt and the sheath latched together. He put on the hat and attached the sword to the back of his belt horizontally.

He took one long drag from the cigar and blew out a great amount of technicolor smoke that partially enveloped him. He then looked at the half finished cigar and whispered "Fuck" before chucking it into the sun below. His good mood now soured, he turned back to the bird with orange eyes due to irritation and said, "Lead the way Hermes."

The bird nodded and turned around, his back now to the Wanderer. His beak and wings began to glow and he made a slashing movement with both of them. Instantly a large, square hole appeared in space, big enough for the Wanderer to walk through. On the other side was great expanse of black; there were no stars but a purple haze that glowed softly floated around in the dark. Everywhere you looked there were small transparent globes that held within each of them a dimension, a universe, a galaxy. Some glowed and others were dim but all were each a separate dimension that floated in the purple mist.

This was the Ether, the space between universes, the balancing flow of time, and the home of the Guardians, the ones who patrolled the Ether and made sure all was right and balance was maintained. Sometimes the fragile surfaces of the globes would tear and essence of the universe would start to leak out onto another, allowing things from that dimension to pass into the other. It was the Guardians job to mend these tears and clean up the messes the leaks had made as well as protecting the Globes from evil that would seek to destroy or corrupt them.

The Wanderer stepped into the Ether and looked at the great expanse he called home. He turned around to see the portal close to the dimension he had just been to, the portal closed itself and not a single trace was left on the surface. All the globes were small to him, he could hold them in the palm of his hand and there were millions of them, more than anyone could count, they all floated around in the gentle haze of the Ether. The Wanderer was in the outer regions of the Ether and even this far out there were many dimensions floating around. The Wanderer made a note to remember the location of this place. He then turned back to the bird and motioned to start forward.

"After you Hermes." he said.

Then both messenger and Guardian started forward at blinding speeds; dimensions whizzing by them as they flew onward. While they traveled, the Wanderer turned to the bird and asked, "What can you tell me about this so called catastrophe?"

The bird flew around as if uncomfortable, “Well LJ I don’t really know all that much it’s just what I overheard from the Council and it sounded pretty bad. Everyone was in a panic and desperate to get you back. Hell they literally kicked me off the Citadel when they told me to git. I didn’t like it one bit dude. It’s actually got me a little scared.”

The Wanderer felt a bit of concern creep up into him, he cared for the messenger like he was his older brother. They could always be seen together whenever they had the chance to hang which wasn’t often. If this Cat-G has got Hermes scared then he knew it probably wasn’t anything to laugh at.

“Don’t worry Hermes; I’ll take care of things like I always do. Nothings gonna hurt you or anyone else. I’ll find out everything about it from The Master no doubt.” he said in a reassuring tone.

The messenger smiled as some of his fears were put to rest, because this was the Wanderer after all; he could handle anything. His thoughts were interrupted as a flash of light appeared and a sound like a trumpet was heard before all faded away and they found themselves in front of the Citadel. It looked like a cross between Mount Olympus and the Vatican City except it was all bathed in gold. This was the headquarters for the Guardians and the home of the Old Gods and the Council as well as the Master. The Wanderer looked at the top of the hill which lay in the center of the floating city at the domed Cathedral where he knew the Master was waiting. It was kind of good to see the city again, floating in a backdrop of a million dimensions. Hermes sped down towards the entrance which was a giant, golden bar gate and the Wanderer followed after him.

Hermes landed and skidded a few feet as light shone from the spot and when it faded what was once a hummingbird now stood a young man with brown skin wearing black running shorts and a white tank top. His Nike sneakers had wings on the side and his black hair was cut in corn rows. He leaned on a tall staff with two snakes intertwined around it as he watched the Wanderer land with a mighty thoom. The minute the both of them were on the ground the gates opened and a tall figure dressed in a black cloak and hood stepped out. His looked at the two behind black sunglasses and said, “Sorry Hermes, you were two seconds behind. I win the bet.”

“Aw man!” exclaimed the messenger, “Alright I’ll pay after I deliver this fool.”

At that the tall gatekeeper looked at the fool in question and said with a bit of a scowl, “Hello Wanderer. You’re late as usual.”

“Piss off Argos; I was too busy enjoying my vacation when a Cat-G had to come up. Which I’m guessing means you clogged up your toilet again.” said the Guardian with an evil smile.

The gatekeeper instantly snarled and growled, “I told you never to mention that incident again. You were the one who insisted I try the Buddha burrito special.”

Hermes was trying to hold back a fit of laughter as he remembered that particular incident. Almost the entire Citadel had to be evacuated and it was also when Argos found out he was allergic to black beans. The Wanderer strode past the gate keeper still smiling as he went and Hermes ran after turning back to Argos and yelling, “Later Hundred Eyed!”

Instead of turning around an eye opened in the back of the keepers head and glared back at the messenger who laughed and ran after the Wanderer. John was taking long, deliberate strides towards the Cathedral as he greeted his fellow Guardians and other citizens of the city. As he approached the doors to the Cathedral he passed a table where two people were playing chess. One was hugely obese and the other had on a robe and his hair was long and brown and he had a mustache-goatee combo.

“Hey Buddha, hey Jesus!” the Wanderer greeted them as he passed.

Jesus looked over, smiled, winked, and pointed two fingers at the guardian and said back, “Sup Long Jong!”

But while he was looking away, Buddha took his rook and knocked away Jesus’s king and cried out, “Checkmate!”

Jesus whipped his head back to see that he had lost and facepalmed as he groaned, “Aw damnit, you nailed me again.”

The Wanderer laughed as he continued up to the door and knocked three times upon the massive stone doors. They opened with a loud grinding noise and an elderly gentleman in a suit stepped out and said, “Ah, Wanderer we have been expecting you.”

He then turned to Hermes and addressed him, “Thank you Hermes, you are no longer needed here. You are dismissed.”
Hermes seemed a bit surprised at this and said back, “Um, but I kinda wanted to know what’s going on here and I thought I was bringing the Wanderer all the way to the Council?”

The butler narrowed his eyes before saying, “I said you are dismissed messenger.”

The Wanderer’s eyes turned a shade of red behind his glasses at the way the butler was speaking to his friend. He stepped up close to the old man and as he did, he suddenly grew taller; towering over the butler and looking down at him from a great height.

“The kid comes with me or I don’t go at all, kapeesh?”

The butler stammered a little as he moved back out of the shadow of the now super tall Wanderer. He composed himself and said quickly, “Of course sir. Young Hermes can certainly join us. Right this way please.”

He spun on his heels and walked/ran to the end of the hallway. The Wanderer shrank back down to his original size and followed after him. I wasn’t kidding when I said they called him Long John.

Hermes jumped up in the air with a loud “Yes!” before running after the Wanderer. He stopped by his side and said, “Thanks LJ, it is so cool when you do that.”

“Don’t mention it Hermes.” he responded.

They stopped in front of another big set of doors and the butler pulled on a rope as a bell rang from the other side. The doors then opened up and the Wanderer looked into a large circular room with a wide, raised stand in the middle and six tall chairs, three on each side of the room, where the council sat waiting. There was mighty Odin with his giant spear, the wizard Shazam, King Minos with his golden hand, the god Zeus who was playing with lightning between his fingers, the many armed Chakravartin, and Leonidas the king of the Spartans, his helmet resting on his legs.

The Wanderer cleared his throat and six pairs of eyes turned to stare at him. Shazam was the first to speak, “Wanderer, thank goodness you are here at last.”

He then floated down from his chair to greet the guardian; his long white beard trailing behind him. He landed and shook the Wanderers hand and whispered in his ear, “I swear had you not shown up just now…..well let’s say Leonidas and Minos might have caused quite the ugly scene.”

The Wanderer nodded before walking up to the pedestal and stood looking at each of the Council members as Shazam took his seat again. Zeus suddenly noticed Hermes standing awkwardly by the door and said, “Hermes? What are you doing here?”

“Uh…” was all he could say before pointing a shaking finger at John.

The Wanderer looked up at the god of lightning and said, “He is merely here to deliver me as you ordered and he has every right to know what is going on now that he has.”

Zeus sighed before saying, “If that may be he must promise not to tell anyone else. We do not want this to get out and cause a panic. Understood Hermes?”

The messenger nodded frantically and made a zipping movement across his lips. “Sure thing dad, I promise not to tell.”
But he was crossing his fingers behind his back as he said this and the Wanderer gave a small smile back at the messenger.

“Very well,” said King Minos,” this meeting can now begin. Guardian Wanderer, you are here because of a category G catastrophe that has occurred in the Ether. You are the only one capable of doing the job that we have set out for you. You must complete it in order for the catastrophe to be averted-”

“I’m sorry,” interrupted the Wanderer, “but all I’m hearing is the usual bullshit, your majesty (He said that last bit with dripping sarcasm). I just got pulled out of my vacation which I have been waiting three millenniums for because of this. I don’t want to hear anything from you. What I do want is an audience with the Master now.”

Minos looked like he was about to explode and Leonidas gripped his helmet with white knuckles but a melodious voice sounded, calming all, “Peace!”

The Wanderer turned to the source which was Chakravartin who was staring down with a kind and understanding gaze, “Wanderer, have patience please. We know you had to abandon your days of relaxation and you must forgive us for that but you must understand that we need you now, all of us do. You will have your answers soon but the Master is currently conversing with the Creator. He will see you soon I promise.”

Odin leaned forward as well, “He is right, mighty guardian. Tis a terrible thing that has befallen us and thou art the only one what can best this catastrophe.”

The Wanderer sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose and said, “Fine yeah I get it, you all need me. Even you need me Minos don’t you? But what is this catastrophe? That’s all I want to know? What is so bad about it?”

The Council members shifted uncomfortably, even Leonidas who kept grasping his sword. Shazam was the first to speak, his words barely a whisper, “Universes are being kidnapped. They have been stolen and bunched together in one place.”

“WHAT?” cried the Wanderer, “How many?! Who is doing this and why?!”

“The amount is unknown but we believe it to be close to a thousand.” Zeus answered solemnly.

“A thousand….” said the Wanderer, his mind just not wrapping around this fact.

Hermes was leaning against the wall; his face was pale and his eyes were wide with terror. No one would ever steal that many dimensions, it was unthinkable.

“Who is behind it?” asked the Wanderer.

“We do not know,” said Shazam, “The Master will give you more details when he is ready.”

“Why would someone do this…?”

Everyone turned to Hermes who had spoken and he in turn stared back, a bit embarrassed. Before anyone could answer, the doors on the opposite side of the room opened and a man in a red robe and hood with a blindfold stepped out and said in an ominous voice, “The Master will see the Wanderer now.”

The Wanderer turned to look at the blindfolded figure then at every one of the Council members and finally on Hermes. He could feel them staring at him with mixed emotions but overall he felt their fear and apprehension. Something he never felt from the Council. He knew they were casting all their hopes on him, even the ones who didn’t want to admit it.

He faced the doors to the Masters office and whispered, “Right then,” before walking into the great room and the doors closed behind with a loud boom.

He looked around the circular room which had a large bookshelf on one end and a wide set of drawers on the other with strange artifacts scattered on the top. At the other end was a great, wooden desk with a tall, empty chair and an open book. Behind that was a large window that looked out into the Ether and the multitudes of shining dimensions that floated by. He knew he wasn’t going to find the Master here so instead, he looked up at the ceiling which was high and domed but you couldn’t tell due to the immensely bright, white light that shone from above.

“Come out, come out wherever you are!” the Wanderer called up.

After a few moments, a figure appeared slowly floating down from the ceiling. He was as tall as the Wanderer and wore a suit that consisted of black pants, shoes, a white shirt and a black tie. His face and hands, however, shone white as the ceiling and you couldn’t make out any of his features save for his long, swept back hair. The Wanderer put a hand over his eyes and said, “Jeez, turn down the lights, will ya? You’re brighter than the average big bang.”

The figure chuckled and dimmed his light; making his features a little more distinguishable meaning you could just barely make out a face. It seemed to smile and said in a voice that rang with power, “It’s good to see you again, John. I’m sorry having to bring you back so early from your vacation. But I’m sure you know why you are here?”

The Wanderer nodded, “Yeah, you know when Hermes told me it was a Cat-G I thought it was probably another intergalactic civil war, or maybe a threat like the Daleks or Yuuzhan-Vong got loose again, or, Creator forbid, another time war but no, it’s someone stealing a shit-ton of dimensions and, correct me if I’m wrong, hoarding them. So by all means, please tell me: What. The. Fuck?”

The Master did not answer right away; instead he walked over to his desk and took out two wineglasses and a bottle of wine. He then poured the red liquid into both glasses and held one up to the Wanderer, “Would you like some Forbidden Fruit Wine? It’ll help calm you down.”

“Fuck yeah I would” replied the Wanderer and he took the glass and they both clinked their glasses together, “Cheers.”

They both drank a little and the Wanderer remarked, “Hmm, so that’s what that tastes like.”

The Master sat down in his chair with a sigh and said, “What you heard is true in part Wanderer; someone has been stealing dimensions but not for some weird collection. Whoever has done this has placed every single dimension in one group, in one part of the Ether…………… all over one single universe.”

The Wanderer choked on his wine and stammered out, “Say what?”

“You heard me…….every single stolen universe has been bunched over this universe and leaks have been deliberate cut in every one of them. The essences of over a thousand universes are flowing down upon this single dimension.”

“How has this universe not been torn apart by the sheer amount of all this?”

“The leaks are somehow being contained enough to not destroy it; they are small enough not to let anything through yet they are still there and prove a great threat. Plus the amount of power leaking out has caused a wall to surround the area making it almost impossible to get in.”

“Almost, sir?”

The Master nodded and stood up to stand by the window and look out into the Ether, “That is where I come in; I can use my power to create a temporary hole in the wall just enough to send you through and once you are in, you are going to go into this single universe and close the leaks.”

“Okay a few questions,” the Wanderer said, “How am I going to close over a thousand leaks by myself? And how am I supposed to find and fight them? All I have is my sword sir.”

The Master turned and approached the Wanderer, “You don’t have to close all of them; just enough to weaken the wall to the point where we can break it down and get in to help. As for finding them, they can only be found once something has gone through which the one behind this has control of at the moment but you will be more than equipped to fight whatever comes through with this….”

At that, the Master pointed a finger and white power enveloped the Wanderer who yelled in surprise but it was gone as soon as it happened and his armor plates now shone silver and white power seemed to flow around his hands before fading away.

“What did you do? This feels great.” he said as he looked himself over.

“I have given you a special gift; that being a part of my power which will allow you to manifest whatever you want from your mind to your hands and use as much as you want. Say you think of a revolver…”

The Wanderer did so and instantly two revolvers appeared in his hands, shining white and silver.

“Whoa now, look at you two pretty ladies” he said as he held the guns up and looked them over.

“As you can see, whatever you think will appear and as for weapons they will have bottomless clips, the ammo completely made of energy.”

“No shit? Awesome!” exclaimed the Wanderer.

“However there is a downside, you will be drawing from a finite pool of energy which you must be careful drawing from for if it grows empty it will start to draw from your own power and drain you. If you drain too much into one attack you will fade.” The Master said with a tone of caution.

“Aw damnit…”

“Now,” said the Master, “May I see your sword?”

The Wanderer seemed surprised but took his sword out of its scabbard and offered it hilt first to the Master saying, “Don’t cut yourself.”

The Master chuckled again before laying a hand on the flat of the blade and again there was a flash of light and when it faded the blade was bathed in a strange, ethereal glow almost seeming liquid. He handed the blade back to the Wanderer and the guardian was surprised at how light it felt now yet there was a lot of power in the blade.

“I have upgraded it to now be able to close a rift from the receiving end and send the essence back to the world it originated from. This in turn, will weaken the wall but you must be careful because it is now powerful enough to cut through anything. Even time itself.”

The Wanderer was grinning ear to ear (literally) as he sheathed his blade and looked back at the Master and said, “I would kiss you if I could see your face and it wasn’t going to be too awkward. With these new powers this job will be a breeze. Just one more question: what can you tell me about the universe I’m going to?”

“Only that there is one single, solitary planet in the entire dimension and the sun and moon orbit it and it is unlike any world you have been to before” answered the Master

“I’ll be the judge of that,” said the Wanderer as they both began walking to the doors, “But I am quite interested in this new world now.”

The doors opened and both Guardian and Master stepped into the Council Chamber. The council members all came down from their chairs and bowed to the Master. He bowed back and said, “My faithful council members, a grave threat has come to be in the Ether and the Wanderer has agreed to see to the repair of this catastrophe. I must ask you all now if you can ready your armies to help once we are able.”

Odin was the first to speak, “My armies shalt be at the ready for your command Master!”

“As will mine!” exclaimed Leonidas loudly.

“My fellow Gods and demigods will stand ready as well” Zeus said.

“I know of a few fighters I may be able to recruit but I hold no promises other than I will fight myself” said Chakravartin.

“I suppose I could spare a few of my men to this cause as long as the Wanderer holds up his end of the job” King Minos said with a smirk, which the Wanderer returned with a middle finger salute.

Shazam approached and said, “I know of many heroes that will more than be happy to help. You can count on me Master.”

He then turned and placed a hand on the shoulder of the Wanderer and whispered, “Good luck.”

The Wanderer quirked and eyebrow and said, “I don’t need luck wizard. I’m the bloody Wanderer.”

He then left the room and walked over to Hermes, putting his arm around the messenger and whispering in his ear, “I need you to gather the others and tell them everything; get them ready for immediate action. We need everyone Hermes, everyone.”

“Even me?” he asked.

“Even you” the Wanderer replied with a smile.

Hermes smiled back but gasped as the Master walked up to the both of them. He then bowed low and stammered, “Master, it is an honor.”

“Hello Hermes,” the Master said before turning to the Wanderer, “We should go now.”

The Wanderer nodded and they both walked through the long hallway together in silence before walking out into the street. They looked at each other before rocketing off into the Ether. Everyone in the city stopped and looked up as they saw the two zoom off.

A few minutes passed and so did several million dimensions as they sped through the Ether. Suddenly they came to a quick stop and as the Wanderer got his bearings he looked at where they were and gasped as he took in the catastrophe they had been discussing for the past hour. There was no way anyone could have told him it was this bad until he saw it.

Imagine a giant tree, a really, really giant tree with all of the stolen dimension being the leaves and the flow of leaked essence the trunk and instead of branching roots it all comes together in a small point which is the single dimension on the receiving end of the leaks and you have the catastrophe. Scares ya don’t it?

The Wanderer was still trying to take in the sight as the Master put in a few more instructions, “Remember your objection is to fix as many leaks as you can to weaken the wall and to help and protect the denizens of the world. Once you take out a certain number we will be able to communicate but as for now you will be in the dark once you are in.”

“Y-yea gotcha…” the Wanderer stammered, “Quick question before I go: what’s the name of the world?”

“Equestria,” the Master said as he gripped the back of the Wanderers coat.

“What kind of a name is thaAAAAAAAAAAHHH!” was all the Wanderer got out before he was suddenly dragged along by the Master who shot into the glowing wall of energy and began to drill inward. The single dimension began to get bigger and bigger as the came closer inside. He pulled the Wanderer up close and prepared to throw him in once they were close enough; the huge amount of power fighting back the Master was starting to burn him but he protected the Wanderer and continued forward.

Finally they reached a point where he could safely eject the Guardian to the other side. “Don’t be too much of a jackass!” he cried as he hurled the Wanderer out and immediately shot back out to the Ether.

“No promises!” the Wanderer shouted back as he fell towards the planet.

On the outside, the Master laughed before gripping his right arm which was burnt and the sleeve ruined.

“You better find whoever did this Wanderer,” he said, “Because they owe me a new suit.”

The Wanderer spun around to try and get a trajectory of his approach. He calculated that he would orbit the planet about eighteen times before being able to land in the most affected spot. He used his powers to view the place which was large forest near an odd looking town.

“Well,” he said, “Let’s start the big entrance. Cue theme music!”

And down on the world of Equestria, music started to sound all across the world from the sky as all the people and creatures looked up and saw a comet race across the sky. It was a strange music that signaled something big was coming down. In a small library, a purple unicorn started to experience weird reactions from her magic as books began to fly off the shelves. Unicorns all over had similar reactions to their horns.

In a bakery in the same town, pastries began to blow up in a spray of frosting and sprinkles. A pink pony licked her lips as she became covered in cake. Elsewhere, animals where running rampant around a small cottage, a cowering yellow pegasus was trying to figure out what was going on and all over the sky, the weather was going haywire as a rainbow haired pegasus raced to try to contain it all. All the while the music played and the comet raced around the world.

The Wanderer took out a cigar and lit it with the fire from his entry into the atmosphere and took a drag as he said, “Cue fireworks.”

And fireworks appeared all over the world; the ponies all stepping outside to watch. The purple unicorn stepped out to watch the spectacle in the evening light. In a castle on a mountain, two regal sisters were watching as well trying to make sense of it. The citizens were struck with awe at the sight of this what looked like a big, flashy entrance. Whatever was coming was something big and badass and they were most certainly right.

The Wanderer continued his decent finally veering sharply towards the forest he had targeted. Everyone (or everypony) watched the star fall into the trees. The Wanderer angled his impact into the ground and landed on his knees, skidding a good few meters on them before stopping with his right arm up, holding three fingers in the air.

“The Wanderer has arriiiiiiiiiiiiiived~” he sang before looking up and seeing that no one was around save for a squirrel that was looking at him with a look of pure terror before fainting out of its tree.

The Wanderers arm fell against his side and he shouted, “FUCK! ANOTHER FAILED ENTRANCE!” before falling face-first into the dirt.....



Author's Note:

Thunder up folks.
It only gets even more awesome from here.