I liked it, honestly. The character development is coming along great and all the interactions seem genuine and a certain ping of realness. So I say good job.
Even though this chapter tried its best to kill me, I'm hoping chapter 5, "Igneous - Obsidian," will be better behaved and let me get it posted on Feb. 18th as per my planned schedule. Spoiler alert: it's got a song in it!
For another long moment, she heard nothing but the rattle of the train and the thudding of her heart. Then a gentle hoof touched her foreleg. "I can't say I understand," Applejack said just as gently. "But I reckon you had plenty of reasons for pulling out. So don't you fret none about that."
Well!
That ended up being twice as long as I thought it would! So much for following my notes!
Mike
I liked it, honestly. The character development is coming along great and all the interactions seem genuine and a certain ping of realness. So I say good job.
FF out, and hoping you updated soon .
2111132
Thanks!
Even though this chapter tried its best to kill me, I'm hoping chapter 5, "Igneous - Obsidian," will be better behaved and let me get it posted on Feb. 18th as per my planned schedule. Spoiler alert: it's got a song in it!
Mike
That's better:
Some shifting of the story's skeleton let me split that big long chapter in two.
Mike
Pulling out, huh?
5182221
Mike