The "Spike" Incident

by Ralfil

Chapter 2: The Gingerbread Man

After shouting how ridiculous my situation was for about ten minutes I was able to calm down again. I could see that both ponies were unconscious, but still breathing. I decided to wake up the first one I had seen. I could only hope that she cared about "Spike" enough to not hurt me for the method I was going to use here. There are a lot of safe ways to get somebody's attention when they are wake. Some may cause discomfort, but none of them will cause injury. I only knew one way to wake someone up quickly without endangering them. I could always clamp my hands over her mouth and nose for a couple of seconds, but I figured that might be dangerous considering neither of us was human at the moment. I've never completely understood why that works anyway.

Before I forgot, I poked at one of the places I had been sore on earlier while underneath the books. Yep, still sore. That eliminated this being a dream. I started looking around for what I would need to wake her up. On closer examination of my surroundings, I found that this was a fairly small library by my standards. I could only imagine that it was a privately owned one rather that being public like I was used to. Either that or this place just didn't have very much literature. Yes there were a lot of books. Every wall had shelves packed with them. I was used to city libraries however.

I glanced at the slow breathing forms next to me. The definitely weren't going anywhere soon. I figured they could wait while I did a small amount of intelligence gathering from the titles at least. I strode over to the shelves and brushed my fingers across the spines in front of me. For the most part the books seemed to be written in English, though the organization was not exactly what I would have expected. Some people don't organize their books at all, while others use a fairly simple method such as size or author to know where to put things. There was a system here. I just didn't understand it.

I finally settled on pulling out a history book of some kind that seemed fairly new. Its pages were still very crisp. Sitting down I placed "The History of Equestria for Foals" in my lap and opened it up. I figured a children's history book would be the best place to start for this. I smirked when I saw that it even came with pictures.

Evidently I was in a nation that had been formed after some sort of magical ice age. Besides that, either the rulers passed down their names every generation, or they were incredibly long lived. One of the two co-rulers who were evidently in charge of the day and night cycle had been forced to banish the other a little over one thousand years ago. The banished one had returned in recent years, and the book gave the feeling that her banishment had just been a really long time out. It also showed pictures of the ponies who had helped calm her down.

I looked up at the two ponies still on the floor. It was definitely them. When I saw their names I couldn't help face-palming again. "These names are absolutely ridiculous." Even with the weird naming conventions I had seen in the book, there was no excuse for the puns in front of me. I couldn't call them Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle even in my head with a straight face, so I thought up a couple of nicknames based on our very limited interaction so far. I felt the names fit perfectly with the style in general that these ponies used for naming each other.

I wandered around for a bit before finally finding the kitchen, leaving Rainbow Scared and Twilight Stupid on the floor. Thankfully, this place had enough modern technology for a faucet in the sink for water. I grabbed a tall glass and filled it as high as I could with ice cold water. It had required a little effort since the sink was higher than I was tall, but claws make it very easy to climb wooden surfaces.

Now that I had it, I needed to get back down without spilling it prematurely. I looked at my tail, which had mostly been relaxed the whole time, and wondered if it was prehensile. After a while of prodding and stretching it I was able to wrap my tail around the glass securely for the trip down.

Entering the main room of the library again, I contemplated how mad Twilight Stupid would be when I did this. I figured there was no way I could accurately estimate that and dumped the water on her head. Her shriek was quite ear-rending. I didn't need to wonder how upset she was any more. That was for sure.

If it had been a prank I would have been rolling on the ground laughing my butt off. In stead I calm stood there not trying to hid the glass in my hand. Once her breathing calmed down for a moment I asked, "You done yet?"

Her head whipped around to face me, and her eyes went directly to my hand. She realized very quickly what I had just done, and her eyes narrowed into slits. Seeing that was a mixture of uncomfortable and funny considering that her eyes took up almost half her face. "Spike," she said, "did you just dump water on me?"

"I don't know who this 'Spike' is, but if you are referring to me then yes, I poured this water on you."

"Why?" There was a dangerous tone there that I failed to notice.

"I needed you to wake up. I'm not sure I want to just go outside when I doubt I'm even on the same planet I was on earlier." I replied offhandedly.

"What?" Confusion was evident.

"You keep on using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

"What?" Confusion was replaced as the dangerous tone returned.

"Ah well," I continued, oblivious, "I suppose I'll just have to look elsewhere for intelligent conversation. As absolutely riveting as this has been, I don't think you seem to have the mental capacity to really understand what's going on here."

I failed to notice her horn light up with a purple glow as I paced back and forth talking. "I mean, come on! It's pretty obvious that the best possibility to work from here is that I've possessed this body some how." I looked down now that I realized my feet weren't quite touching anything. What I could see of my body was now glowing the same purple as her horn.

"I think I'm quite capable of understanding that you poured ice cold water on me and don't see a problem with it."

I stared at her for a moment, gears turning. I asked my brain what was going on. *ERROR: GRAVITY NOT WORKING* Well, that wasn't good. I settled on it being either telekinesis or magic. Either way, I reacted by screaming, "Evasive action!" and throwing the glass at her head.

She was startled enough that she stopped doing whatever she had been doing to hold me up in the air. I fell with a thump to the ground before scrambling up and making a break for it. I knew where the kitchen was, and I had seen a window there with an easily opened latch.

In the kitchen I climbed up the counter and dove out the window as soon as it was open. It was one of those ones that you have to prop open, so it slammed shut behind me. I started booking it as fast as I could to get away from the building. Now, the body I was in was clearly not in shape. This kept me from running without pain, but anyone who has run cross country knows that it's more of a mind over matter sort of thing to keep going when you tire easily.

Thankfully I was able to duck into an gap between two homes before she was able to get outside even. I saw her streak past me yelling for "Spike" and looking quite furious. I chuckled under my breath as I hid behind a trash can, "Run, run, run as fast as you can. You can't catch me." I finished the saying in my head as I took this opportunity to look around the town from where I was. What I saw was definitely not what I had expected.

Comments

[Malesur Darkhoof]

Heh, commence the chase scene!

[Sandman]

ENGAGE THE BENNY HILL THEME MUSIC!

Also, I'm very disappointed for not taking advantage of a perfect opportunity to reference Pulp Fiction.

[kingtiger666]

You know, this is one of two Spike HiE fics in the popular stories bar. I guess they'll both go on my read later list. Note to self: Stop reading so much fanfiction, it's not good for you.

[Ralfil]

1726133
The weird thing is that we both posted our stories on the same day.

[Atlas_Nebula]

1719530 Does this mean that you actually like a ponyearthverse story?

[Drawdex]

I'll tell you what i've seen in this story that's just perfect and you deserve my like because of it.

1- Your main character is a smart person whom takes upon himself to deduce his situation and don't panic initially, but realistically shouts because of his ridiculous situation in a lapse of a minutes, making him not seem overly implausible human being.

2- Have this person try to reason with "creatures" he has never seen before in a civil matter, using a obviously advance lexic, in a body of what we and the "creatures" consider a child.

3- Intelligently plaing each situation in a deep description that seems to try and put the situation in a serious matter but eventually finishing with said situation in a comical conclution, at least up to this chapter withought disappointment.

wugr.biz/Benny614tv/Main/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/this-is-gonna-be-good.gif
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lzvcs6CHXo1qgcvz9.jpg

[006spykiller]

INTERESTING as always

[x-Kiryu-x]

1726133
Wait there's another?

-Kiryu

[Ralfil]

1733107
It's called They call me...Spike? It's a good story so far.

[fferror]

1734512
I'm interested in reading that story, but it seems to have gone password-protected now. Any idea why, or where I might find a copy to read, or who the author is so I could contact them about it?

[Red Bomber]

1734512
Oh Good another guy in Spike's body story that I've been looking for.... well hopefully I didn't fave that one already. ^^;

Geez, it's like Twilight CANNOT get her head around that the guy in Spike's body is not Spike.

[JazzyWaffles]

MC: "I'm an isekai protag"
NPC: *unloads standard.exe, loads advanced.exe* "I am suddenly too stupid to take anything at face value"