“Can someone explain to me, why there is a cage surrounding us!?” I screamed aloud, trying my best to turn into something to break out, but being unable to. “Why can't I transform?” I whispered to myself, “Is it because of the cell? Is it suppressing me, somehow?” I turned my focus to Pumpkin and said, “Pumpkin, see if you can blast us out.”
Her horn glowed with an azure aura, and she shot out a small beam at the bars, her attack was absorbed and the cage unaffected. “Doesn't seem like it...” she replied.
“Weird...Pumpkin can still use her magic...Is it species specific? No, that can't be it. There's no reason to worry about a changeling wrecking the place, no more than a unicorn or pegasi at least.” I thought to myself.
“It's interesting watching you think, it's not often these dusty gears start turning.” Chrysalis commented.
“Chrysalis, are you blocking me from using my powers, again?” I thought to her. She gave no reply, only simple silence. “Argh! It looks like we're trapped. Buck!”
Pumpkin and Pound Cake gasped, speaking in unison, “Shifting Sands! You're not supposed to say that word!”
“So I've been told. Then again, I'm also not supposed to prank Luna, but I still do.”
“You still like to prank?” Pound Cake tilted his head.
“Yep, I even plan on shaving her mane off, tomorrow.”
“Nice.” we hoof bumped.
“I can't believe you two, hoof bumping over something like that? I'm disappointed in you both.” Pumpkin said, crossing her arms. “You can't just shave off somepony's mane like that. You also need to dye their coat.”
“Ahh! I should've thought of that!” I replied, hitting the side of my head. “But where would I get the dye from?”
“Well, Rarity owns some special dye, if you put it on somepony and wet them, they'll randomly change color every couple of seconds.” Pound Cake stated, getting a nod from Pumpkin.
“That's great, you gotta bring some here, next time. I think we could-” The gryphon suddenly roared out, the shade of her face matching that of bright crimson. “I thought you guys laid her out!” I shouted at the twins.
“Did you really think a filly and colt could take me down with a few cheap-shots!?” The gryphon snarled, stepping ever closer to us.
“Uhh...yes?” I whimpered.
“You know, I was originally going to make your death simple and quick. But because of that, I think I'm going to take my time ending your life...and how about your little friends join in!?” She said, her focus sharpening by the second. Pumpkin and Pound cake started holding onto me, shivering in fear. I held onto them, terrified myself. She roared and leaped at us, her claws prepped to slash and rip apart anything that had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting them.
I don't understand what happened next, I felt a deep, terrifying fear. I wanted to leave, I wanted to run, I wanted to push Pound Cake in the way so I would last a little longer. Instead, I pushed the twins behind me and held my arms out. “What are you doing!? Move!!” Chrysalis screamed to the furthest depths of my mind. She didn't know how much I wanted to, she didn't know how I wanted to break down and cower. I couldn't, as much as I wanted to, I couldn't.
And thus, I met with the gryphons claws, shredding through my skin like paper. I screamed out in agony, the pain much more than I could have ever imagined. I fell to the ground writhing in pain, my blood spilling out onto the floor, she cut deep, very deep. “Smart move, it's best not to prolong your suffering.” the gryphon said, giving a smirk and licking her claw. “Mmm...delicious. I might as well pick up where we left off, we've played enough, I think.”
She raised her claw into the air once more. I remember the twins calling out to me, their cry faded, as though it was nothing more than a whisper. The gryphons sadistic smile growing larger, as her claw once again made it's way to me, only to be stopped inches from my face, by a yellow aura of magic.
“Shifting sands!” I heard, looking out the corner of my eye to see that familiar, blue alicorn standing above me with tears in her eyes and worry on her face.
“Luna, calm down, close his wounds, we can't move him like this.” I heard the voice of Celestia say.
“Tis alright, Shifting, ye shall be fine.” she said, magic flowing from her horn into my wounds.
I moved my eyes to focus on Celestia, who was standing face to face with the gryphon. Celestia gave her, of all things, a smile.“Well, princess Maryiana, it seems you've caused quite the incident. You even mortally wounded my son.” she said in a kind tone.
“Oh, that's the changeling you told me about? I'm sorry, I thought he was just some meal that happened to wander in.” Maryiana replied, sarcastically.
“Meal? Neither you or your father told me you ate changelings.”
“Must have slipped our minds.”
“Well, whatever the case, try to stay out of trouble, ok?” Celestia closed her eyes, still giving the gryphon a warm smile.
“Don't worry, I'll do my best.”
“Oh, and don't you ever strike my child again, understood?”
Maryiana grinned and replied, “What if I confuse your son with some other changeling and, accidentally, rip him to pieces?”
That gentle face Celestia had been giving her was now gone, replaced by one of pure rage. The second she opened her eyes, the windows were blasted out of the school, her eyes had gone completely white, and she stood as if she were ready to fight. “Don't you EVER strike my child again,” she roared in the traditional Canterlot voice. The school began to shake, and the tiles on the ground started cracking, “Understood!?” Luna didn't seem to mind all the chaos, she was completely focused on healing me. I just couldn't believe what I was seeing. Never in my life had I seen Celestia so angry, I was now more scared of her than I was the gryphon.
Maryiana sighed, “Yeah, sure. Now let my talon go.” the school stopped shaking, Celestia's eyes returned to normal, and she let go of Maryiana's talon. Maryiana just looked at me and walked down the hall, away from the disturbance she had originally caused.
Luna managed to close the wound, to both of our relief. She picked me up and hugged me, covering herself in some of my blood. I could feel her heart racing. While Luna did heal me, she couldn't put the blood I had lost back inside me. I hadn't regained my strength. “Luna...what are you doing here?” I coughed.
She hugged me tighter and said, “Did ye really believe we wouldn't arrive at thy first day of school?”
“Oh...well, it's nice to see you're here...where are Pumpkin and Pound Cake?” I said, my breathing getting heavier.
“They're fine, I told them to hurry to their classes, but right now we need to get you to the school medic.” Celestia said, walking over to me.
“Oh mom, I'm fine.” I tried to wave a hoof, but I couldn't lift my arm. “Whats going to happen to the gryphon...?”
“We'll talk about that later, right now we need to get you to the school medic.”
“I told you, I'm fine. Watch, I'll show you.” I tried to push myself onto my hooves, failing miserably, unable to move at all. “This paralysis proves nothing.”
Celestia shook her head with a smile and said, “Alright, I think it's time to go.” as Luna began lifting me with her magic.
“Nurse Rose Heart! Are you here?” Celestia called out, practically breaking the door down.
“Hmm? Celestia, is that you? It's great to see-” the blue-gray, unicorn mare stopped in her tracks as she came from behind a white curtain, her light brown mane being held in a bun. Her eyes being of a vibrant violet. “Oh my goodness...w-what on earth happened!? Luna you're covered in blood, and the changeling...”
“Can ye treat him?” Luna asked, the urgency in her voice clear as day.
“I'll do what I can.” she replied, pulling me into her magic field and resting me on a white bed. “First things first, what happened?”
“Maryianna.” Celestia said, her face scowling at the mention.
“Ok, that answers that.” Rose Heart replied, lifting my eye lids, taking a deep gaze into them. She then placed her hoof on my forehead. “He's so cold... This blood you two are covered in, it's his isn't it?”
“Indeed, we took attention to his wounds as soon as possible.” Luna answered.
Nurse Rose Heart cast a spell, a light shining from her horn. She moved the light around my body, her focus on it seemingly unbreakable. “Ok, I think I know the problem...” she said, putting a hoof to my chest, casting another spell. On the wall above me appeared a display of my vital signs. “Ok, we're in the green zone for now.”
She tapped on the the floor beside the bed, and a magical image appeared in front of her. I don't know what it said, but I do know is that she moved her hoof around it, looking as though she was pressing something, and out of a white light, an IV came into existence. She placed the needle in my arm and the clear liquid began to drain into me. “There, that should do it.”
“A simple IV? Are you sure?” Celestia asked.
“Yep, his vitals still appear to be in the 'safe zone' so I don't think anything more than this should be needed. Still, it's kinda off putting to know that a child was sent into hypovolemic shock just because of that gryphon. Why did she attack him anyway?”
“Verily, she wanted to devour him.” Luna said.
“Oh, great, another thing to worry about.” Rose Heart sighed. “Anyway, this changeling, this is Shifting Sands, right? The one you told me about?”
“Yes, and I can't thank you enough for helping him.” Celestia said, bowing her head.
“I just need to ask, are you absolutely sure this is Shifting Sands?”
“Yes, I am, why?
“I ask because there are some other issues that need to be addressed.”
“Other issues?”
“Yes, I noticed it when I was examining him with my scanning spell. Shifting Sands seems to be showing some signs of malnourishment.”
“What? How? Are you saying one of us isn't loving him enough?”
“No, I'm not. I'm saying that as a changeling, he might need to digest more than just love. Maybe it's like giving a little colt nothing but candy to eat, while you are feeding him, it's not going to supply the nutrients he needs. I'll do some research on it...and there's one more thing.”
“What?”
“Shifting Sand's genes, they don't...seem right. I could just be exaggerating, but I would like to take a blood test to be sure, once he's recovered, of course. I can't use the blood you two are covered in, I want as little contamination as possible.”
“Of course, Rose Heart, but what do you mean 'they don't seem right'?”
“I'm sorry, Princess, I'd like to be sure before I say anything more on the subject....where did Luna go?” Rose Heart asked, looking around the room.
Her question came in the form an explosion, followed by a booming voice shouting, “TURN AND FACE US!”
“Oh dear...” Celestia said, running through the door. “LUNA! STOP!!”
Nurse Rose Heart shrugged and walked over to me, she lifted my hind legs and cast another spell, creating pillows under them. “What are you doing?” I groaned out.
“Exactly what it looks like, elevating your legs.” she replied, magically fluffing the pillows.
“Why?”
“It'll help the blood circulation. You know, you really shouldn't be talking while you're trying to recover. What you went through was nothing to laugh about.”
“Sorry, but I want to ask you something.” I said, trying to lift myself up.
“Ap-ap-ap!” she said, pushing my back down. “Lay down, and stay down.”
“But-!” I sighed and gave in. “Alright.”
“Now, I'll let you ask your question, but it'll have to be brief. I don't think your mother would approve of me letting you strain yourself.”
“That gryphon...who was she?”
“Maryianna, daughter of the gryphon king, princess of the gryphon kingdom, royal pain in my flank.”
“I take it the kind of encounter I had with her is normal?”
“No, she normally just breaks a bone or two. She doesn't usually try to kill, or much less eat other students.” she said, walking to a counter on the far left of the room, shining in the same manner as the marble I'd seen before.
“If she causes so much trouble, why does Celestia let her stay here?”
“Should you really be calling your mother by her name?” she turned her head towards me, giving a friendly smirk as she raised her eyebrow.
I sighed. “Fine, why does my mom let her stay, if all she does is cause trouble?”
“That's better!” she turned her head back, and began opening some of the drawers. “Now, she lets her stay because the gryphon king has been kinda antsy lately.” she said, causing assorted medical equipment to float out of the drawer.
“Antsy?”
“Yeah...” she looked around the room, “where did I put them..?” she whispered, putting everything back.
“What do you mean, 'antsy?”
She began looking in other drawers on the counter. “I mean he's been threatening to go to war with Equestria. The princess didn't want that to happen, so she decided to let her stay here to show that she holds no ill will against them. The only problem is-”
“Maryianna?”
“Exactly.” She pulled out a bottle of pills and closed the drawers. “Finally found them.”
“So if Maryianna is here to help create peace, why is she so violent?”
“Well, I think it's because Maryianna is a spoiled brat, but your mother believes the king is trying to provoke a war. Today's attack certainly adds evidence to that.”
“What would the gryphon king want a war for?”
“I think I've answered enough of your questions, your mother would really be disappointed in me for telling you. So let's agree to keep this between us, alright?” she said, walking over to me with the bottle of pills.
“Don't worry, your secret is safe with me.”
She opened the bottle and said, “Good, now open wide.”
“What fo-” a pill shot into my mouth, and the shock caused me to swallow. “What did you just give me!?”
“Just a little something to help you relax.” she said, gently stroking my mane my mane as I drifted off into slumber.
“Chrysalis? Chrysalis!” I shouted into the dark abyss of my dream world.
“What is it?” She responded, slowly forming out of the darkness.
“Earlier today, I couldn't transform. When I asked you what happened, you stayed silent. Why? What did you do?”
“As nice as it is to see you thinking of me,” she darted directly in front of my face, “I didn't do anything to deserve this pleasure.” she pulled back and started walking around me.
“Like hell! Pumpkin could still use her magic, and it's unlikely they were specifically for me. Someone had to be behind the strings, and you're the only one I know who could stop my abilities like that. What's even worse, you made me stand there and get slashed, too!” I said, pointing at her.
“I did no such thing! I told you to move out the way, I told you to save yourself! Why you didn't is beyond me.”
“Oh yeah, you did tell me...wait...you told me.”
“I believe we've covered that, I told you to move.”
“You told me to move...you told me to... Chrysalis! At any point in time, you can freely control me to do whatever you want, even speak through me. If you wanted me to move, why didn't you just do that?” I sat there, waiting for her to respond, but she didn't. She simply stared at me and stayed silent.
“Well? Why didn't you?”
“Because she couldn't.” said a deep, booming voice coming out of the surrounding shadows. “She's lost the power, isn't that right, Chrysalis?”
“What?! Whose there? Show yourself!” Chrysalis replied.
“If that is what you desire, then I will reveal myself...” the voice said, as an open claw rose from the shadows, “But not to you.” the claw closed into a fist, and crushed her.
“CHRYSALIS!!” I screamed, my heart starting to sink.
“Worry not, child. She is fine.” it said, as a sudden burst of wind blew away the darkness, the wind being so powerful that I had to close and shield my eyes. It felt as though a tornado was breaking through the area, but soon enough, it stopped. When I opened my eyes, my jaw dropped and beheld a sight I never even imagined. A large crystal, in the shape of a dragon. It's scales radiating with a subtle rainbow like beauty, however, the scales themselves were the shining example of pure silver.
I looked around, trying to find the holder of the voice. Instead, I saw the room was circular, made of diamond, shining in the same way as the dragon. It's walls reaching higher than I could see. “Child, we have much to speak of.” the voice said.
“I'm not saying, or listening to a thing until I've seen who I'm dealing with!” I shouted in reply, turning around randomly, trying to catch a glimpse of the voice holder.
“I'm right here.”
“Right where?”
A giant claw stomped down behind me. “Here.” I turned around to see the crystal dragon, moving on it's own accord.
My ears dropped, my eyes widened and my mouth hit the ground.“Ok, you have my attention.” I squeaked.
“Shifting Sands...this is the name you choose to go by, correct?”
“Y-yes...”
“Then that is what I shall call you.”
“Uhm...lovely...uhh mister dragon, sir. Why am I here?”
“I wish to test you.”
“But I didn't study-!” his claw smashed down on the ground, the wind blowing me onto my back. “Ok! I got it! No jokes!!”
“Shifting Sands, you wondered why you could not transform, did you not?”
“Yeah, but it was just Chrysalis messing with me. Why she did it, she doesn't seem to want to say.” I got back onto my hooves.
“No, Shifting Sands. I am the one who stopped you from changing.”
“What? How? Why?!”
“I siphoned my magic from you.”
“Your magic? What does your magic have to do with anything?”
“Shifting Sands, the 'school' as you call it, is a construct of my magic. I made it long ago, to guard my place of slumber, and entrusted it to Celestia.”
“Oh...but wait, that doesn't explain why you keeping your magic from me does something!” I pointed to myself.
“It's because you inherently have no magic.” he said, dragging his claw through the ground, forming the shape of a bottle. “Imagine a bottle, empty and closed.”
“Uhm, alright...” I raised my brow, questioning what this had to do with anything.
He swept his claw across the ground, and the room suddenly flooded with water. I held my breath, thinking I was going to drown. “You can breath, relax.” I took a deep breath in, trusting him, and to my surprise, I could breath. He lifted his claw to me, holding an empty glass bottle. “Now, what do you suppose would happen if this bottle were opened while we're in this water?”
“The bottle is empty, so water will just flood in...” I said, as I was swimming around, having a ball.
He opened the bottle, and all the water drained into the bottle, and I fell to the ground. “You are the empty bottle, the water is the magic that exists within the world.”
“Uhh, what?” I pushed myself off of the ground.
“The world is filled with magic, but you are not. Every time you transform, your body drains just enough magic from the surrounding area to make it work. It is the same with your wings, however, your body can't keep up with the demand and you tire out.”
“Well...that's...huh...” I rubbed the back of my head, somewhat disbelieving of what I was hearing.
“This is where the problem arises.”
“Problem?”
“You only take in magic when you try to use your abilities, but you are a creature which requires it to function. I believe you cannot use your horn, am I correct?”
I held my horn. “I can charge it, but that's about it...”
“Because you mainly exist without magic, but require it as a changeling, your body has begun to shut down. You are slowly dying.”
“WHAT?! But what about the love I eat!? Isn't that magic!?”
“Yes, but Chrysalis feeds off most of it for her own survival, you get so little that it barely counts as food”
“Mother of the year...” I said, feeling a mixture of anger and disappointment
“It's her form of parenting. She believes it's better to watch you closely, guide your path her way, rather than existing on your own free will. But that's a topic for another day, now listen closely, there is a way for you to start absorbing magic as you should.”
“What is it!?” I shot onto his face. “Tell me!”
“You have to get your body to adjust to absorbing large, consistent quantities of magic.”
“Alright, and how do I do that?”
“You live with two beings of extreme magic, magic so powerful that it overflows into their manes.”
“If you tell me I have to eat their hair, I'm going to-”
“Do what?” his eyes sharpened.
“Give you a big ol hug! Heh...but please don't tell me I have to.”
“You don't have to.”
“YES!” I jumped off his face in joy, and began falling towards the ground again.
He caught me and said, “Soon enough, your body will begin to lose it's ability to absorb magic, all magic, this includes love. When that happens, Chrysalis will no longer exist, and you will die.”
“I'll die if I don't start eating horse hair?! ARE YOU SERIOUS!?”
“Yes, and as you start to absorb more magic and grow stronger, so will Chrysalis. She will gain even more power over you. So much power, she may be able to over-write your will with her own.”
“These are my two options!? Eat horse hair and possibly lose all control of myself, or slowly starve and die!?” I shouted in total disbelief, the dragon nodded in reply. “This is...I don't think I like this test...” I buried my face in my hooves, trying to think of a possible way out.
“This isn't the test.”
I looked at him, my mind terrified of what the test could be. “Then what is?”
He roared at me, the voice alone feeling like a hurricane. The world began to twist, crack, and crumble. Soon it all turned into smoke, and burrowed into my eyes. It hurt, the pain even more than the gryphons claw. I screamed out, my body twisting in ways I never imagined possible, my bones breaking, my vision blurring.. my mind was going totally blank, all thoughts turned into the feeling of pain and nothing else. “I saw you protect those two, earlier today. Before I go any further in nurturing your magic, I want to see if it was a fluke. Until then, they'll be under my protection.”
“W-WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME!?”
“I have given you the spirit of hate. Every day you shall grow more and more spiteful of yourself and others, and in a week, you will kill yourself. The only way to combat this spell, is to sacrifice yourself for the sake of another. In three days, I will personally see if you pass or fail. Life or death, Shifting Sands, do you have what it takes to survive?” he growled, as he closed his claw, and crushed me.
“AHHH!!” I screamed, waking in a cold sweat. I looked around to see I was in my bed, alone in the room. I sat there, panting. I was scared, I couldn't tell Celestia or Luna anything, I could only hope they would protect me if something were to happen. Until then, I had to convince myself it was nothing more than a dream...but I couldn't.
Well, that's not very nice.
That escalated quickly... but holy shit I WANT MOAR
Huh, things just got interesting.
So, now that he have his new upgrade, Chrysalis will not longer have control over his powers? Or if he pass the test, Chrysalis will not longer bother him?
If that is the case, that is great news, maybe he can stop pranking Luna and start to see her as an aunt. Best case scenario we will start a transformation ending in him returning to be human.Also, I don't get it, did he hate or love Chrysalis? For someone that only has given him a massive headache and up right using him only to kill him after, he show a strange concern when she was kill.
P.S: What happen to his brothers?
1840842
He hasn't gotten an upgrade, he's gotten a bunch of dilemmas. He understands how his abilities work, but in order to keep them and live, he has to start feeding on Celestia's and Luna's manes. However, if he does this, Chrysalis will get stronger and stronger, just as he does. So strong that she may be able to completely change his personality at a single whim.
Then he has to deal with his test, if he can manage to sacrifice himself for someone, he will survive. However, if in the event he fails he has one week before he kills himself. Also, Chrysalis is still around (inside him), and his care for her will be explained later.
His pranks on Luna doesn't mean he doesn't care, he loves Luna just as much as he loves Celestia, he just has different ways of dealing with both of them.
To answer your P.S. question, I can't say. Spoilers, and I don't like to spoil. :P
If Chrysalis is blocked then he have free way to tell everything about it to Luna or Celestia.
1840877
Ah I get it, and did he love Chrysalis? Or can he, tell his mother and aunt what is happening with the test?
1840890
All to be revealed in time.
wow that was deep now im not sure how he is going to eat hair or get it but this is gunna be good
Hmmm, really good chapter.
And man thats a downright infuriating situation with that gryphon, I would have killed her on the spot.
Or at the very least clipped her wings.
I started reading this two hours after it started (this chapter I maen) and I just finished.
1853099
That's alright, lol, just tell me what you thought and enjoy your xmas!
1853177 That gryphon doesn't really seem to care much, does she?
I am now expecting her to join him on some sort of quest to A) Stop the war. B) something random that leads to her death/capture and the war. Or C) Become his friend and ask for help on her own quest. C seems to be rarely used on the main character.
mmmmmm horse hair, yummy....
...I'm sorry, but i cant like this story. You seem to be trying to make the main character a magnificent bastard, but he seems more like an oblivious arsehole, and the conversations he has are way to light hearted for what the current situation it is in demands. I'm suprised he hasnt said something along the lines of "I dont give a sh1t." and also, some of the situations make no sense, whatsoever. like with the gryphon, why the hell is no one stepping in to stop her? and the crazies who wanted to kill changelings, the "judge" seemed WAY to fanatic to be the hero he seems to think he is. Your trying to make it a serious fic and a comedy at the same time. This might not be intentional, but that doesn't give you any excuse. my recommendation? Learn what story you want to write.
1976408
He isn't a "Magnificent bastard", nor am I trying to make him one. He's (currently) just a smart alec who tries to avoid his problems.
He isn't oblivious, as stated in the second chapter, he does not try to worry. That's what it looks like when a person genuinely does not want to concern themselves with certain situations. He's trying to avoid these situations.
I make the conversations light hearted so I don't bog down the reader with drama and to make contrast.
It should be obvious by his nature that he generally doesn't care and doesn't want to be involved. Infact, in the last chapter of "Unexpected Changeling" he is quoted as saying "Buck you, stop convoluting my life more than it already is."
"Daughter of the Gryphon King", "Trying to provoke a war", "Usually breaks a bone or two" - This should've been more than enough to tell you A: She has diplomatic immunity. B: She has a reputation for hurting other students (also look up the bystander effect for extra credit). and C: Celestia is trying to tread cautiously so the Gryphons do not start a war with her, and thus, injure a countless number of her beloved subjects.
" and the crazies who wanted to kill changelings, the "judge" seemed WAY to fanatic to be the hero he seems to think he is." His name is "Justice" and I don't think you understand the term "Fanatic" if you can honestly say this sentence.
I'm trying to keep the story light when it needs to be, and serious when it has to be. The number of likes compared to dislikes tells me that I seem to be doing that right. Writing a serious story does not mean I can't make it light hearted or comedic. Have you ever read a spider-man comic? One piece? The To Aru light novels? There's nothing wrong with mixing genres. Having a purely serious fic stresses out readers, and having a purely comedic or light hearted fic can turn some people away. Having a fine mixture of both is how you attract the most people and show your own style of writing. Now I would take your suggestion, if I found it useful in any way, but I unfortunately do not. So, I am sorry you don't like it, I'm glad you took your time to try and tell me of it's flaws, but all of which you listed were intentional and why people like it. Thank you for stopping by, good day.
1977072 True. This is my opinion. But the situations... sometimes they just demand drama. I'm sorry, but this is way more light hearted then it probably should be. at least with me.
1977091
I understand your opinion, and that you are free to have your own, but I feel it's fine the way it is.
1977168 Let me bring up one more thing.
You see, i feel that the comedy in this story is not exactly the best. It has its moments, but it seems to mostly consist of SS and Chrysalis bickering at each other.
1977578
The comedy is what I find funny, and the basic gist of my comedy is: Reaction.
Be it in a conversation, just doing something stupid, or realizing something stupid, reaction is what I find funny. I also gave him his smart mouth personality because I do indeed find that funny.
1977992 Yea, smart mouths can be pretty funny. I wont argue with you there.
But still, this doesnt make the story seem good in my eyes. But hey, cant all be perfect.
1978196
If you can't enjoy the story, then I'm sorry. I still thank you for caring enough to try and help.
1978262 Meh, mabye its just not for me.
1985090
Again, is 10 times better sleep in Celestia room, he doesn't have the sleep patrons of Luna, and for I see, what Celestia did, only create the rivalry of those two
Hair for lunch. Hm. Well, if I had to assign flavors, I'd guess that Luna's would taste like a Grape slurpee, and Celestia...Rainbow Sherbert. But hey! this might work out for the better! He was going to shave Luna's mane anyway, so now he'll have plenty of materiel to much on!
If Equestria did go to war, the hive he's inherited would have plenty of ponies to replace. Might be a dark way of looking at it, but it's also practical and efficient.
Well, I eagerly await for the next chapter, and wish you luck with your GED.
1985151
Thank you.
One question, if he pass the test, that it? He will can kiss Chrysalis out of his mind, being in total control? no longer fear or her controling his emotions, and force him into love her?
2073934
Can't say. I don't like to spoil, it ruins the fun. And seeing how on edge so many of you are is part of it. XD
well, he's fucked.
2335372 you got that right
How do you like that; chrysalis is a tapeworm.
I just kill chrysalis. and fuck the hell what the crystal dragon say. if I die then the changelings can't hurt anyone anymore.