A Tail of Two Ponies

by Lilyheart

Chapter Twelve: Ponyville

🥜

What on earth was happening to me? Why am I crying? Why am a pony, stuck in a girly cartoon world with my friend mothering me like he isn’t the one incapable of holding a job and being responsible about anything?

“Eh, yep, that’s me,” said Sunset, albeit a little awkwardly. Maybe we can go to the Equestria Girls universe and then at least I can have hands. Sunset muttered something.

“Sunset, I know you don’t know us, but we need your help,” Lilyheart was saying. Or should I still think of him as Andrew? What do you want me to do, God?! I don’t know!

“We need to get to either the Golden Oaks Library or Twilight’s Castle–the Castle of Friendship!” Lilyheart continued. “If you don’t know what one of those is, just forget it and take us to the one you do know. Sunset, please. You’re one of the few ponies in all of Equestria I would trust.”

“Um… sure. I can take you to the Castle of Friendship,” answered Sunset. She sounded quizzical. But I kept my face buried. “Can I ask, why?”

“Post-season four, confirmed! One moment, please,” answered Lilyheart, and then gently to me, “R– Can you stand? I’m certain things will be better once we get to the castle.”

I nodded and slowly stood up, looking at Sunset for the first time. Confused and concerned cyan eyes and same old bacon hair. She was carrying a tan saddle bag.

But I was distracted by the presence of Lilyheart’s hoof on my foreleg, as though preparing for me to fall over. A smothering presence is the exact opposite of what I needed.

“I’m fine. Please don’t touch me.”

Lilyheart flinched away immediately, as though I had slapped her hoof away. Great. Now I’ll have to apologize for that later. I guess you are still Andrew.

“We’re good to go,” I told Sunset as I began walking towards Ponyville.

“Uh, right, this way,” answered Sunset, her eyes hovering on my tail and flank. “So, uh, can I at least have your names?”

“Lilyheart!” cheered the blue unicorn as she appeared by Sunset’s side with the exuberance of Pinkie Pie. “Don’t tell Rainbow, but I think you’re the coolest pony in Equestria.”

“Uh, thanks?”

“No problem! It’s not a compliment if it’s the truth!”

A yellow pegasus flew by just as we entered the outskirts of Ponyville. Horses. Horses everywhere. A few unicorns trotted by, one levitating paint brushes and jars of paint; another, a few teddy bears. An elderly stallion sat upon a bench, a subtle smile on his muzzle as he watched the passersby. A pink unicorn with an oddly shaped horn led a hyperactive foal, probably to school. I choked when Lyra and Bon Bon brushed past.

“We eat at the Cafe almost everyday!” complained Lyra.

“I asked you where you wanted to go, and you said anywhere that made me happy!” answered Bon Bon.

The pastel colors, noisy bustle of the ponies getting their day started… it was dizzying. I decided to ignore all of it the best I could (especially the strange looks the ponies were giving his horse body’s hindquarters) and focus on following Sunset Shimmer, her bacon tail swaying gently as she walked. But Lilyheart looked like she might faint from joy. Her head darted about causing her curls to bounce. She gazed longingly at the teddy bears, snickered when passing by Ponyville’s most famous couple, and almost looked like she was going to gallop over to snatch a particularly cute foal and squeeze the living daylights out of them.

“Eeeeeeee!” She pranced as we followed Sunset.

Andrew was never this happy. Was I wrong? My stomach… the horse stomach, twisted in knots. Guilt. Why do I feel guilty?

‘I said I wouldn’t leave without you.’

‘Always my Samwise the Brave!’

I tried to leave without you. I should leave without you. You belong in this place. I don’t. Isn’t that what Discord wanted to prove? But if my friend didn’t need me–No. I was disoriented. Confused. I wouldn’t have made that choice if I was intellectually sound; no more than making a bad choice in a dream can be a mortal sin.

“HIIIII, SUNSET SHIMMER!” screamed a high pitched voice with a subtle crack.

I looked over to see Sugarcube Corner, and at the top window, a very familiar, beaming pink face. Oh no.

The figure gasped, and shut her window.

“GOOD MORNING, SUNSET!”

Pinkie Pie was right behind us.

I leapt into the air. A goat was bleating somewhere close by. I found myself on my back, my legs frozen and stiff in the air.

Meanwhile, Lilyheart let out an “EEEEP!” and fled behind Sunset, who practically toppled over from Lilyheart clutching her legs.

“Uh, hi Pinkie,” Sunset answered. “I think–”

Pinkie gave an almost obnoxiously loud GASP, hovering into the air as she did so.

“Oh my gosh Sunset did you make new friends? Why didn’t you tell me? Where did you meet? When did you meet? This is so exciting! Almost like when I met Twilight for the first time and then I was all like -GASP- and then I ran away to set up her surprise party but then Nightmare Moon crashed it and it was the best day ever! Except now this day is even better because I’m meeting two friends instead of one which is like twice the fun which makes this -GASP- twice as bestest!”

“Hi, I’m Pinkie Pie. What’s your name?” Pinkie was right next to Lilyheart, who opened her mouth to speak, but Pinkie was gone too fast.

“Oooh, and what’s your name?” Pinkie’s head appeared out of a barrel of oranges beside me. “What’s your story? Are you best friends magically transported into Equestria and turned into ponies by some unknown, mysterious force, and now off on daring quest to meet Twilight to hope that she can turn you back normal, but first you’ll have to learn something about friendship and defeat some terrible evil force and face your worst fears like singing in public and having everypony laughing at you?”

Lilyheart and I blinked.

“Nah, just kidding. That would be totally unrealistic,” said Pinkie before recoiling her head back into the barrels of oranges and reappearing on the other side of me. She now stood there with her head cocked to the side, waiting expectantly for an answer.

“Right, Pinkie Pie,” answered Sunset. “These are two… ponies I just met. I’m taking them to see–”

Pinkie gasped again. “You just met them? Why didn’t you tell me, Sunset?”

“Uh, I just did?”

“Oh, right. So, any way, you were just telling me your na–”

Pinkie’s tirade of chaos quickly ended when I stuffed an orange into her mouth.

“I cannot deal with this right now,” I mumbled. “Pinkie Pie, I need you to respect my boundaries.”

Pinkie swallowed the orange whole and looked at me quizzically. “Boundaries? What are those? Are they a kind of cupcake?”

I face hoofed.

Lilyheart ran up to Pinkie and grabbed her shoulders. “Pinkie Pie, we love you, and you are the best pony… at throwing parties and cheering p-p-p-ponies up. But I need you to do a favor. The surprise party you want to throw for us? Or, welcome party, whatever? Can you please wait, like, a week, before throwing it? And pretend like… imagine if you were throwing a party for Fluttershy? You know, calm, gentle, not too overwhelming?”

“Aww, but I was going to try out my new party horns!” Suddenly she had one in her mouth and blew it in Lilyheart’s face. As the party horn unfurled, it made a sound more akin to an airhorn. It was as though there was a microphone inside it.

“Yes,” answered Lilyheart, her ears folded back from the noise. “But the best party is tailored to each particular pony, isn’t it? And the longer you go… if you wait a week then you’ll know more about us and can throw an even better party.”

Pinkie Pie’s eyes widened, and then her face formed a smirk. “Oh, you know how to speak my language, sister.” Pinkie broke from Lilyheart’s grasp and danced in the middle of us. “THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST PARTY, EVER!”

The word ‘ever,’ echoed. Every pony in the vicinity was staring. Pinkie dashed away, off to do who knows what.

Lilyheart fell to the ground and put her hooves over her head. “I’m surprised that worked. But… oh… that was too much for my introverted heart. It’s like that guy said about Teddy Roosevelt, ‘You have to wring the personality out of your clothes after.’”

“So, that was Pinkie Pie. Sorry about that. You get used to her. She really isn’t that bad once you get to know her,” said Sunset as she offered a hoof to Lilyheart.

“What did you say your names were again?” asked Pinkie.

“This is Lilyheart,” Sunset answered for us. “And… actually I didn’t get your name.”

“I didn’t say it,” I mumbled.

“He’s my brother!” blurted Lilyheart. “Forget his name for a moment. Just… just ignore that.”

Pinkie looked like she was processing something.

Brother, Lily? You’re a unicorn. I’m… look like an earth pony? We look nothing alike. Then again, there was Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake.

“Okay!” Pinkie shouted. “Also, Lilyheart’s Brother, I love the Hearth’s Warming Tree look!” She dashed away again.

Sunset eyed the two of us. “Do you two still want to go to the castle?”

“Yes,” Lilyheart and I answered in sync. She looked like she was going to say something, but then walked on. Darn it, Andrew, stop worrying about me and just make the stupid soda joke.

It took a few minutes of walking through the heart of Ponyville to get to our destination. A few buildings were familiar; the town hall, Rarity’s boutique, and also a smattering of random shops I never saw in the show. Most buildings were the same pink and off white to bland yellow, but a few broke the pattern.

Sunset soon led us to something of a main road that clearly led to the castle. A few ponies walking by waved at Sunset, while Lilyheart and I politely smiled and sometimes either gave a wave or even a gentle “hello,” back.

By the time we got to the gold, heart-encrusted doors of Twilight’s Castle, the horse hooves had finally begun to ache.

“Is it alright if you two wait here for a moment?” Sunset asked us. “There’s just something I want to check on. I promise I’ll be back really soon.”

Lilyheart and I nodded before watching Sunset trott up the stairs and disappear behind the doors.

“Are you okay?” Lilyheart asked.

“Yes,” I mumbled while trying to figure out how to stretch the horse legs. “And brother? Did you only say that so I’d have to call you my sister?”

“What? No. I mean, that does make me feel all bubbly inside to be called that, but no. Pinkie called me sister and it got me thinking.” Lilyheart hoofed the ground. “I can’t call you your real name, you obviously don’t like… the other name, so brother made sense. I mean, we used to refer to each other as siblings.”

“You can call me Robin.” I forced the name out. “I’m just tired, and it was a lot. But I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” It’s my problem, Andrew. Just let it go.

“O-Okay, Robin.” Ignored the twinge of annoyance when she used the word. Hail Mary, full of grace…

The gold doors swung open again. Sunset’s head poked through. “She’ll see you, now.”

We climbed up the steps and through the doors Sunset kept open for us. Odd that Spike wasn’t there to do it. Inside, we found the familiar burgundy floors, crystalline pillars, and faint purple walls. Sunset led just straight into the central chamber. The Cutie Map rested in the middle, hugged by seven chairs, and the roots of the Golden Oaks Library hung from the ceiling.

All of it lined up with Equestria as I knew it. Except, no alicorn sat in the chair with Twilight’s cutie mark. Instead, it was a completely different pony altogether.

Author's Note:

Pinkie why would you give away the plot like that?

Please give your best guesses for who has replaced Twilight!

This chapter features some very subtle cameos. The unicorn carrying paint supplies is a nod to the late GreyGuardPony's Skitch-Sketch, while the pink unicorn is the amazing whimsycreator's Pastell Swirl.

The yellow pegasus is actually supposed to be Parasol, but she's a background pony of such obscurity that Robin didn't recognize her.

Very special thanks to batty proofreader Raiss.

Comments

[Raiss Icewind]

I bet it's Aloe from the spa, the massages were so divine she ascended.

As for the background pony references, I don't know any of those ponies. And greyguardpony just returns a dead link.
I can't believe you're calling me batty, I'll have you know I'm quite sane! Only the sanest of bats around here.

[Lilyheart]

11886279
Link is fixed! Thanks again.

And the most sane person in an asylum is still in the asylum.

[Dravkwn]

All of it lined up with Equestria as I knew it. Except, no alicorn sat in the chair with Twilight’s cutie mark. Instead, it was a completely different pony altogether.

Starlight Glimmer, is that you?