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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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All that’s left is Rarity and Spike making their escape.
I know this is a revamped story, but could you please say what actually happens in this story in the synopsis?
11696793
ehh I suppose I could tweak it a little.
11696795
What’s a Gulltoppr and since when do Changelings gone Japanese? Also, wasn’t Chrysalis got captured by the caribou before they conquered Canterlot?
11696866
again, revamp and more will be revealed in the later chapters.
11696877
Okay then. Well at least Pinkie and Flutters are safe. Although you did forget the part about Rainbow Dash's wings in the last chapter. You know, the one how the caribou do to Pegasi so they won't fly away?
11696866
11696877
Yeah, read and remember the original…
11696795
Which ones did you edit, or will edit?
If the Nobushi were already knocked out, then why would AJ and Dash have to use their shields to separate them from Pharynx?
11696916
when I say "Them" I mean their blocking Pharynx from getting to Dash and AJ guarding wulfric
11696922
Ok
11696795
Also, what did you mean by tweak it a little? Which ones are to be tweaked; already tweaked?
11696909
11696939
I was talking about the synopsis
11696943
Oh, I think I misunderstood 'synopsis' since I was still trying to figure out the correct term for the "long descriptions/narrations" that I had referred to, last week.
Liked the Nobushi, the female samurai; not sure if there were female ninjas; but this revamp contains more focus on female skilled warriors.
Too bad they were the only ones who got knocked out, and knocked out so fast. Which is somewhat surprising since the Nobushi were supposed to be more agile and had more armor than the male Shinobi… Not to mention they should’ve been more skilled or experienced than AJ or Dash.
Basically, with their armor, better skills, long sharp naginatas, and changeling agility, it seemed unlikely that they could get knocked out by the two mares so easily. Like that seemed too easy and by comparison, it looked a little like the female samurai were weaker than their male counterparts
Nice work here and nice way to introducing the Japan Changelings and Chrysalis and looking forward to seeing how the talks go and how they maybe form an alliance with each other. Thou I bet Pharynx is gonna be a problem later on
Are the ponies the knights faction
11697701
yup
11697561
Hopefully not too much of a problem.
At first he seemed so against outsiders and angry and resentful with his brother’s decisions. But then all of a sudden, at the end of the chapter he seemed reasonable and willing to let them enter the palace.
11697701
11697720
The ponies with Luna and Bulwark? So no knights of the golden sun? In the original, there was one other faction, Luna’s hidden village with escaped refugees and exiled nobles and caribou who spoke out against Dainn.
PS: in the original and it’s sequel these exiled nobles and caribou were never referenced or mentioned again after the initial chapter with the hidden village
11698067
not yet.
11698047
Only time will tell
11698134
It just seemed odd that he suddenly had a complete change of heart & mindset.
11698524
Unless hes planning something or trying to see what this could lead to later on and what he will do then
11698547
I sincerely hope he doesn't; the honorable samurai and the other races/factions of the rebel army are all supposed to be on the same side and have the same moral and 'good' values and intentions.
Perhaps his part/scene can be changed by Valiant so that Ryu's words got through to him and made him change his mind. So that Pharynx didn't growl and hold his fists in anger, but instead reacted differently to his brother's words
11698608
One can only hope but in every group no matter the side there always someone who has their own views/ideals/goals that’s not always the same as the others
11698674
I know that, but I think that's not how the story should/would/could go, and I'm pretty sure most of us wouldn't wanna see that
11698680
True tgat but hey only time will tell on how the story goes and what the writer will do later on
11698608
11698735
Or maybe not; or maybe it doesn't, that's why I suggested he could edit the chapter so that Pharynx reacted differently after Ryu's reprimand
11698749
That’s up to him
Na
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GF_IbFpn-HA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_N1qwnktffk