Love Sick
Sweet Apple Acres, Rainbow Dash’s P.O.V.
Finally! We’ve gotten all of the ingredients for the stupid potion and have it made! We were in the stupid forest for about four to six hours! “I swear,” I say to the girls, “If I had to find another patch of nine leafed clovers again the next time somepony gets sick, I’m going to scream!”
“Now now, darling,” Rarity says to me, “Just be thankful that it’s just Wishing Star that needs this, and this would be the only time that we need to make this trip to Everfree Forest for something like this… I hope.”
“I can’t wait to get a ‘Make a Quick Recovery,’ party for Wish!” Pinkie exclaims excitedly, “He’s going to be so happy, he’s going to wish that would get better tomorrow!”
“Let’s not start rushin’ things Pinkie, healin’ takes time,” Applejack says to her, “But yer right, now that we’ve gotten everything for Zecora to work her magic and the potion concoctin’, Wish’s gonna get better in no time flat!”
For once, I agreed with AJ. Ever since that I heard about Wish’s emotional breakdown described by her, I was in shock. How could one pony like him hide it from us for three days or even longer, and not tell us about it? At first, I thought he was acting suspicious again, but given the evidence that Applejack and Rarity told me, I felt awful for him.
“Um… Rainbow?” Fluttershy snaps me out of my thoughts, “Is everything alright?”
I looked at her confused at first, but then I sighed and said with a smile, “Yeah, I’ll… I’ll be okay. I just still can’t believe he didn’t told us about his illness.” My foalhood friend gave me a confused look like I did, then I continued, “I-I’m not mad at him! I’m just… confused, that’s all.”
Rarity then says to me, “I’m just as confused as you are darling, we all are. Even though I do want to question him as to why he kept it from us, it’s best that we don’t put any more pressure than we did three days ago.” She then sighs sadly, “This is my fault.”
We were all shocked to hear her say that as she continues, “If I had caught wind of it earlier, I… Ugh, I should’ve paid more close attention and not get too caught up in my own work! I feel so… so…”
“Greedy?” Applejack finished for her.
Rarity dipped her head in shame as she nods.
Fluttershy steps in and says, “It’s not your fault Rarity, neither of us would’ve known about his illness. He’s must’ve felt like he didn’t want to let us down and continued on with his job helping you. You’re not greedy, you just didn’t know he was sick and didn’t think of it.”
As we got to the barn, AJ opens the door for us letting us in. Rarity felt better by Fluttershy’s words and putting her at ease. “You’re right. Thank you dear.” Rarity says as she gave Fluttershy a hug, then she continues, “I’m going to check on Twilight and Wishing Star, and see how well he’s getting.”
That being said, I crashed onto the couch and stretched out my wings and limbs. “Ah… glad that we’ve gotten that problem resolved,” I said with pride, “I’m never gonna do those scavenger hunts like that again, I’m seriously! Can’t they just get those items themselves?! I mean, I know we are the Elements of Harmony and all, but seriously!”
AJ just rolled her eyes at me, I know she’s right and she knows it, even if she hides it.
Morning, Wishing Star’s P.O.V.
As the light of Celestia’s sun once again shined through the windows in the bedroom. The coldness of my body was still there, but thanks to the warm body temperature of Twilight, I was kept from shivering last night. Opening my eyes to see a still asleep Twilight, I couldn’t help but smile again. Then, against my chest, I feel her head pressing against it… was she listening to my heartbeat this whole time while we were (No pun intended) knocked out cold?
I then noticed her smile and mumbling something in her sleep, I couldn’t make out what she said, but I would assume she’s talking about her research on this ‘Below Zero,’ illness. I found it remarkable that even though I wasn’t there to change her mind about her going insane in ‘Lesson Zero,’ she came over to me and helped me. I am truly in her debt, despite what she said to herself, calling herself a klutz at one point.
I looked at Twilight, and now I was wondering, What does her heart sound like? At the same time, she adjusted her position as she lays on her back, her head leaving my chest. Looking her chest, rising and falling with every gentle breath, my curiosity got the better of me and it was my turn to place my on her chest, and as I did, I noticed two things:
The first thing I noticed was that the tuft of pelt on her chest, shockingly to me, was soft, and I’m not talking about like a designed jacket, I’m meaning like one of those soft fluffy pillows that you rest your head on and let it sink in. With Twilight’s though, she has that fluffiness a lot more than any other pillow. Smart, talented, endearing, and a chest that fluffy and thick! I thought to myself amusingly, but then back to curiosity again, Did her family tree had a Pegasus ancestor at one point?
BA-BUMP
My eyes went wide as to how loud her heart was beating, making me lift my head off of her chest and look at her, her smile was still there. It got me thinking more and more, and it reeled in to only one question. Does she… have feelings for me? Thinking it that there must be some sort of fluke, I rested my head on her chest again and listened. As I did, the loud beat of her heart was audible again. Holding her close, beats began to pick up it’s pace, and if I remembered correctly at one point, her heart was beating ten times as if it was playing a melody! Her heart beats in a My Little Pony theme? I thought to myself after her it returned to it’s normal beatings.
I chuckled at this new found fact and looked at Twilight. I’m glad she isn’t a normal pony, nor a normal unicorn for that matter. Though, it got me thinking, when her heart was beating the way it was, was she thinking or dreaming about me?
Not wanting to disturb her or ruin the moment, I rested my head on her chest again, listening to her heartbeat more, hoping that little melody would play again.
12:17 P.M. Twilight Sparkle’s P.O.V.
As I opened my eyes and seeing the sunlight through the window, I looked at the clock above the furthest window and checked the time. Goodness, I never sleep that long! Hehe, I guess I could see why Rainbow Dash enjoys these kinds of naps. I thought to myself amused. As I was about to get up however, I felt something on my chest. Looking down at my chest, seems like I had an intruder to my heart.
I chortled quietly at the sleeping Wish as I petted his reddish-brown and golden yellow mane. His body temperature seems to be returning somewhat normal, that’s a every good sign. I sighed, just looking at him, seeing him sleeping so peacefully, I can’t imagine how he would even sleep through those two days have a cold body.
I suddenly heard a door open and in came Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy, coming in with a breakfast tray. “Good morning Wish!” Fluttershy greets first, “I hope you’re feeling-“ Pinkie then gasped dramatically. I quickly used my magic to keep the party pony’s mouth shut, that as to not wake Wishing Star, looking at him, he wasn’t startled awake. I sighed of relief and gently moved his head off of my chest and back onto a pillow, I had to make sure that it was properly fluffed of course.
I quietly got out of bed and mouthed to the shocked earth pony and pegasus to leave the room quietly. Both getting the hint, we left the room and knowing them they’re probably going to scream in shock, so before I closed the door, I casted a soundproof spell around the room, making sure he gets his rest with any audible distractions.
I sighed and looked at them, releasing Pinkie’s mouth, and said, “Okay, go ahead.”
Oh boy, did they let me have it? They screamed so loud, the very house shook! Pinkie Pie, I could understand, but Fluttershy? She usually doesn’t scream that loud, it’s always like a soft shrieking! As they stopped, the look of shock on their faces were still imprinted on them.
“We’re so sorry!” Fluttershy says apologetically, “We didn’t mean to intrude like that!”
Pinkie’s reaction was a very stark contrast to Fluttershy. “Oh my gosh! You two cuddled?! You two are coltfriend/fillyfriend already?! *Gasp!* Did you say 'I love you' to him?!”
I was blushing by the questions she kept peppering me with. Sure, we cuddled, but that doesn’t mean it was any of the romantic sorts! “Pinkie! It wasn’t anything like that!” I explained to them, “All I was doing was keeping him warm so he doesn’t shiver so much!”
“What the hay’s goin’ on up here?” Applejack asked as she, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash came upstairs. They must’ve stayed overnight after they got back from their adventure in Everfree Forest. “Ah haven’t heard screams like that since Granny’s panic attack of mice that came through her room!”
“TWILIGHT AND WISHING STAR CUDDLE!” Pinkie explodes very loudly, that earned a gasp from Rarity, Applejack a very shocked expression, and Rainbow?
“WHAT?! You guys cuddled?!” She asked me, that made us look at her confused at her statement, but then she says, “Uh! I-I mean, ew! Gross! … did you two even kissed?”
“IT WASN’T LIKE THAT!” I exploded, my face was getting redder than an apple, “I only slept with him just to keep him warm! That was all!”
Fluttershy then asked me, “Then why was his head resting on-“
“Keeping him warm! How many times do I have to say that?!” Applejack and Rarity were smirking at me with a look that could rival Princess Celestia’s practical knowing face.
“Alright, sugarcube, alright. We get the hint.” Applejack says casually, her smirk was still spread across her face, “Anyway, we’ve gotten some breakfast all set for ya and Wishin’. I’ll go check on ‘im and see how’s that cowpony’s feelin’. Rars, care ta join me?”
“Oh yes! I hope he’s feeling better than yesterday.” Rarity says to her as they went inside his room.
As the rest of the girls and I went downstairs, I felt like I forgotten something… I should’ve taken care of it… Oh well, I’m sure I’ll figure it out once I had breakfast.
Applejack’s P.O.V
We checked on our rough rider and he seems to be wakin’ up, heh, about time too, I would’ve sent in little AB in for the good ol’ wake up call, but I remembered that she and the rest of the Crusaders were at a sleepover at their clubhouse. “Hey there pardner,” I greeted him as he looked at me groggily, “How are ya feelin’?”
He smiles and says in a raspy voice, “Better.”
Rarity and Ah sighed of relief. “That’s quite good to hear, you’re even beginning to sound better too darling!” Rars says to him cheerily, giving him a hug, “Oh! Before I forget, I took the liberty of getting your clothes cleaned.”
“Thanks” he says with gratitude as she hooves the clothes over to him, looking at them, he feels somewhat conflicted by something. “U-Um… AJ? Rarity? I… I want to apologize for… for everything.”
“Oh sugarcube,” Ah say to ‘im, “Ya’ll have nothin’ to apologize for.”
“But if I don’t say this now, I’ll regret it later!” He insisted, he took a deep breath and then began, “I… I’m so sorry… I really wanted to tell you, but I was so focused on helping you, it became a priority for me. Ever since I first met you girls, for the first time in my life, I felt like I can do anything and be something for once! Rarity, when you gave me an opportunity to work for you as an apprentice at the Boutique, I’m eternally grateful for the job opportunity, and I still am… but I feel like I’m just taking advantage of you…” he the brought the clothes to her as he then finished by saying, “Here… take them. Somepony may probably will need them more than me.”
Rarity looked his clothes, then at me with a sympathetic look on her face. She looks back at Wish, pushes the clothes back to him and says, “You’ve done nothing of the sort darling. If anything, it’s you who had done so much. Probably much more than anypony else could. You helped save Equestria from Discord, you’ve helped make everypony smile, heck, even Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo look up to you like an older brother they never had!”
He was taken aback by what Rarity had said. “Really? Th-they look up to me?” He asked her, she nodded in response. He slumps down in shock, “W-wow, I… I didn’t know how much of an impact I made here. I’ve been here in Ponyville for a week and three days, and already I’ve made a impact on everypony here.”
“Patient check up!” We heard three fillies, we turned to the open door and there was the Cutie Mark Crusaders , dressed up as doctors.
We heard Wsihing Star chuckle as he greets them raspy, “Hey girls! What are you doing here?”
“Applebloom told us that she was being a doctor so she can help you feel better,” Sweetie Belle explained to him, “So we thought that we could join in and-“
“And possibly earn a medical cutie mark in the process?” He guessed.
Scootaloo jumps on to the bed and answers him, “Yeah! Applebloom also said that she was appointed as head doctor until Twilight comes back!”
“What do you mean?” He asked her.
Ah jumped in and then explained, “Well, that’s what we wanna tell ya’ll, The National Dessert Competition was only a day away and Pinkie Pie has invited us. She was gonna invite ya as well, but given as to how yer still sick…”
“It’s okay AJ.” He says to us, “I understand. I can watch the Crusaders while you’re away if you’d like?”
“You mean we watch over you.” Scootaloo corrected him. Ah see how he’s looking at me, knowing the Crusaders, they’re gonna stop at nothin’ to get their cutie marks.
Ah just gave ‘im a hearty chuckle and said, “Well, we’re off then! Ya’ll have fun now!” Both Rarity and Ah left the room and shut the door behind them.
“You really think it’s a good idea to leave the fillies care for Wish?” Rarity asked me.
Ah looked back at the door, giving a moment before answering, “Honestly? Ah think he’ll be fine with ‘em, besides, he seemed to handle them very well bout a week ago. Though, given that he’s sick, he’s gonna need some backup…”
“I’ll watch over them.” She says confidently, I raised a brow at her, “Trust me. Dealing with fillies and a sick stallion will be easier than sewing dresses… Alright, terrible comparison, but still, every Carousel Boutique employee needs to be in tip top shape.”
I chuckled and said, “Well, yer the boss hoss.”
Rarity’sP.O.V.
I made sure that the pomegranate tea nice and warm for Wishing Star, using my magic to lift the tray and being very careful as to not accidentally spill it on the floor. Making my way upstairs, I overheard laughter coming from Scootaloo and Applebloom, and hearing Sweetie Belle asking, “He didn’t!”
“No joke.” I heard Wish say, “My dad flipped that table so hard, it spins around seven-twenty degrees away from him!” He was cracking up laughing as he continues, “And so, *snort* so I-I came in to the living room, and then I asked, ‘Dad what’s going on?’ And then-then he says, ‘I had a king at the very bottom of the deck! Why was it at the very bottom of the deck, you dipstick?!’”
They were laughing like a pack of jackals at a stand-up comedy club, of course I couldn’t help but giggle at the small portion of his story. I regained my composure and knocked on the door.
“Come in!” He says.
I cleared my throat from the little skit and calmly said, “Hello Wish. I hope you don’t mind, but I’ve made some more tea.”
“Thank you Rars.” He replies to me, taking the plate and cup, he took a tiny sip and took in the flavor of the drink. “Mmm… very devine M’Lady.” I noticed that his smile started to fade as he looked at his filled cup, tapping on the ridge. I could tell something was bothering him
“Is something the matter Darling?” I asked him, he stayed silent for a few moments. I turned to the Crusaders and then asked, “Girls, could you give your patient to speak with me in private?”
“Sure!” Applebloom says, “We’ll be waitin’ out by the door if ya’ll need us!”
The Crusaders left the room and closed the door behind them, leaving just me and Wishing Star alone, for now. “Wish, are you alright?” I asked him.
He sighs and says to me, “Be honest with me Rarity, do you think… do you think I’m just mucking up everypony’s lives by just being here?”
I gasped in shock by the question, does he really still feel like he's interfering with our lives? "Honestly," I say to him kindly, "I'm very much happy that you're here in Ponyville, darling. You've made things much interesting and you would step in to resolve conflicts when nopony else would. So, no, I don't think, nor do I believe that you're causing a bother to anypony in particular."
He gave me small smile, I can see a hint of sadness in him. I've seen it so many times, that's taking Sweetie Belle into an account. I know Rainbow would crack a joke, but what would she say? I thought to myself, Hmm... wait, earlier, he and Twilight were cuddling. Does he perhaps have feelings for her? "So... You and Twilight?" I asked him in a teasing attempt.
He looked at me confused, but the slowly transitioned to a face of shock. "R-Rarity," he stammers, "I-I can assure you that-"
"Honestly dear, I never took you as a romantic type!" I say to him, cutting him off, "Twilight told me that there wasn't anything going on, but I think you two have quite a romantic spark."
His blush was getting redder. "M’lady please, it's n-nothing like that, it's-
"And the way you rested your head against on her chest. Hehe, I could tell you liked how her heart sounded like. Oh! Rainbow even asked Twilight if you two kissed ye-"
"NO, I DIDN'T KISS HER, GIVE A REST ALREADY!!!" He shouted at me, I know he didn't mean to be rude, but he didn't have to be so harsh.
...
"But you like her, yes?" I asked him. At first, he didn't answer me, his eyes darted away from mine. I then say to him kindly and gently, "Wish, look at me." Hesitantly, he lifted his head up and looked me directly into my eyes, I know a pony who’s falling in love and the look in his eyes tells me the whole story. “You have a thing with Twilight, don’t you?”
“No.” Oh honesty, now you’re acting like Sweetie Belle! I thought to myself as I pressure him.
“Admit it.”
“Nah-uh.”
“You love her.”
“That’s a lie.”
“You’re lying to yourself.” I said to him firmly.
He caves in and says, “Okay, yes, I love Twilight… I love her and I just… ugh, I don’t know how to say it.”
“Well, you’re in luck dear,” I say to him, “I happen to master of one of the hidden languages in all of Equestria. The art… of flirting!”
He placed his hoof on his chin in thought and says, “Well, I could… but what should I say? Or more specifically, what should I say that would be towards her?”
I then placed my hoof to my cheek in thought. That is a good question, what should he say and do to flirt with Twilight? After giving it a thought, a lightbulb went off in my head. “Ooh! I got it!” I cheerfully exclaim, I then went to his ear and whispered the idea to him.
He turned to me with wide eyes and asked, “You’re sure that’ll work M’lady?”
“Absolutely.” I say to him encouraged.
After Twilight Sparkle’s P.O.V.
I had to say, being detective was quite fun! If any mystery like that ever happens, I would jump into the opportunity to solve one case at a time!
“I still can’t believe that you were that quiet when you gotten your hooves on that piece of cake AJ,” Rainbow chuckled giving her a nudge.
“Hey, Ah couldn’t help it!” Applejack defended herself, “Ah know ya’ll couldn’t help yerself as well.”
Rainbow chuckles embarrassingly. Truly, it’s nopony’s fault that they had that cake, I’m just glad everypony learned their lesson today. As Applejack opened the door, I went in first and the first thing I notice was that the lights were off. “Hey Applejack?” I asked her, “Did you left the lights off when we left?”
“No, why?” She asked me.
As if on cue, the lights went on and I was taken aback by a scene that I wasn’t expecting, right on the couch was Wishing Star, laying on his side, looking very, very strange, and he has a what looked like a rose in his mouth? And… is that slow music I’m hearing in the background? “What the heck?” That was the only thing I’ve ever said, I was completely confused.
“Hey…” He greeted me with a strange accent, “How’re you doin’?” He raised his eyebrows twice.
That’s when I realized something! “Wishing Star!” I say to him, “What are you doing out of bed!? You’re suppose to be resting!”
His ears went flat and dropped the rose from his mouth and looked very confused. “I-I’m sorry, what?” He asked me.
“You know what Wishing Star!” I scold him, getting him off the couch using my magic, and gettting his turquoise flank upstairs, “You’re suppose to be resting, not being up and about!” I could hear the girls giggling and snickering, though I have no idea why, but that was ‘t my main focus right now.
As we got in the room and sighed, “Now, stay in there, and don’t get up until you’re fully recovered.”
As I was about to leave the room, I heard Wish say, “Whew… Is it hot in here?”
That was when I really something. “Oh! I completely forgot!” I used my magic once more to lower the temperature of the room. “There we go, not too hot, not too cold.” I say with approval, I looked back at Wishing Star looking very dumbstruck.
“B-but, but-“
“Now, get some rest. See you tomorrow!” I say to him and closed the door behind him. I went back downstairs and see the girls with funny grins, except for Rarity who just facehooves herself and shook her head. “W-what?” I asked them.
“Oh, nothing darling.” Rarity reassured me, “Nothing at all.”
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Wow, thanks for the shout out, appreciate it.
And DO'H
, Twilight is really dence at the whole romance department.
11336086
Eh, don't worry, she'll figure it out... eventually.
Things are getting interesting
11336111
Indeed it is!
Better get used to it Rainbow. You are officially one Celestia's lapdogs now and be glad this run wasn't as dangerous as your future endeavors.
This whole Rarity segment feels unnecessary, mainly because it was short and you could have shown them cuddling through one of their pov. Skip Rarity and jump straight to his pov would flow much better imo.
His temperature going down is a good sign while having a cold body?
Add the word if.
Worries about crossing the line. Persists when he is clearly uncomfortable. Seems out of character for Fluttershy. After his initial embarrassment she would have immediately stopped and apologized. I get you want him to confess for whatever reason, but having it happen due to imo an out of character moment isn't the way to do it.
11336131
I'll definitely work on those fixes Ethan, thank you.
11336131
There we go, errors fixed.
Could you fix the description of Bluu?
i.imgflip.com/4nawy9.png
11336157
There, should be fixed now.
11336147
So, instead of actually addressing my final issue, Fluttershy pressing the issue with Twilight, despite worrying about pressing the line before she does it and instead of having her stop you make it worse, but making that scene longer and her continuing to press the issue, even using the stare to force him to confess, or it seems that way, since it wasn't that clear what she did. If you want it to stay that way fine, but acting like doing that fixed that specific critique of mine isn't actually the case and it's clearly the opposite. I prefer the original version to be honest. All in all Fluttershy feels even more two faced and contradictory in thoughts and actions. I get you want him to confess and you can't change too much that it will prevent that, so I will just move on. You do know you don't have to listen and do what I think 100% of the time, right? If you want or have a reason for something, regardless of what I or anyone else thinks about it, you can keep it how you write it. In fact you don't even need a reason as side from that' s just how I want it. What I am saying is be open and listen to constructive criticism at your discretion.
11336176
thanks
11336177
I sincerely apologize for taking that too seriously. Gee, now I know how Rarity feels.
11336184
Like I said, use your discretion. If you think I or anyone makes a valid point then sure go ahead, but don't feel like you have to do it. If you don't really want to change it or anything then don't. Also when someone points out an issue and you do change it, make sure you actually fix and address their actual issue, instead of doing the opposite like with Fluttershy. I do feel a little disappointed that me bringing up my issue with that scene caused it to become a lot worst. Oh, well I will deal with it.
So, did she use the stare to force him to confess? Cheapening what could have been a heartfelt confession, but removing his choice in the matter and cornering him to do so, completely out of character for her.
11336193
Not going to answer my question? Ok then I will just move on now.
11336235
Sorry, I had time to ponder that. At the time, I thought this was out of comfort.
11336270
Out of comfort? What? What does that mean?
11336295
You know there’s that one moment that you don’t wanna talk about it, but you do anyways?
11336309
I'm pretty sure out of comfort is the wrong idiom for this. It seems to mean the opposite to me. Do you mean out of your comfort zone instead. My issue isn't him doing it, but Fluttershy forcing him too when it's again out of character to her. That's it plain and simple. I'm moving on now. I made my point.
11336317
Again, I sincerely apologize for this.
11336322
It just hit me that instead of using Fluttershy you could have used Rarity instead. Maybe re add the scene of her noticing them cuddling early on and have that motivate her to push them together. And have her be the one to get him to confess and make his flirting attempt. That would be more fitting than Fluttershy somehow having the gall to tease him while he is clearly uncomfortable without feeling bad to stop despite that being her concern beforehand. This seems like something better suited for Rarity to set up then Fluttershy after all. Just a suggestion. Again you don't have to use it if you really don't want to. Moving on now.
11336337
I'll definitely use it. Thanks Ethan. Even though you say I shouldn't listen to people telling me how my writing styles work, it's still nice to get advice from time to time.
11336346
I didn't say you shouldn't listen to people. I was trying to tell you to only do their suggestions if you honestly feel they are great and valid. You shouldn't feel you have to if you truly don't want to is all. That would be hypocritical of me if that was the case lol.
11336355
Still, thanks.
Thank you very much for the shout out.
Poor Twilight is really dence in the romance department, hopefully she can get some pointers from Princess Cadance and I feel so bad for Wishing Star as his hard work was all for nothing. *pats the poor guy* Don't give up Wishing, you'll eventually find a way to confess your feelings for her.
11336391
Not a problem man.
Yeah, Wish’s flirt mode at first attempt was indeed a fail. Wishing Star, expert at making wishes come true, failure of flirting.
Wishing: *Does something romantic*
Twilight: Oh yea, it's small brain time!
Also waitin' for more 'cuz I feel you got something in your sleeve
11336708
Ah yes, the "Big Brain Time," meme, but reverse!
Clever of you Sun!
11336398
Thanks.
Oh for sure he failed badly at flirting, when I gotten to that part my mind immediately thought "That's something Rarity would have suggested to him." LOL
Thanks for the shout out and I'm excited for more.
Saw story on update tab. Noticed word count was the same. Clicked on it and sure enough no new chapter
11352388
Sorry about that, I accidentally pressed publish on accident, it’s not done yet, but rest assured, it is almost done! All I need from you guys is patience.
seriously Twilight! I mean come on, how many romance novels have you read?!
Oooh noon
TWILIGHT!!!
OH MY GOSH!!!
Rarity is going to be so disappointed
I thought in a previous chapter, it was said he’d been there for three and a half months…?