“Well… no, see sug the ability is rare, and only slightly more common among mares then stallions, but we’re talking maybe one in every few thousand ponies, even less realize they have it.” Bonnie stopped at a door labeled Staff Room and listened for a moment. “And only recently had my spells actually made it safe.”
There needs to be an a to make pointers
Bonnie gave a soft chuckle and patted Twilight on the back. “Well don’t worry about it now, I’m sure I can give ya some pointer sug and since you’re The princess’ student I’ll even let ya eat here for free once a week.”
We needs to be we'll or add will after we
“We serve normal food too sug, now why don’t you head back to the princess while I go check up on my server that nearly got ate.” Bonnie said with a smile. “We discuss lessons and what not later.” Bonnie waited for Twilight to leave before heading upstairs.
Its needs to be it's in this case. I got confused with it to, but it's is it is and its is plural
“Well the spell makes it so it doesn’t hurt and feels good. All the food spells do.” Lemon Patch said “Its fun time and best job I’ve had.”
Pretty good story, only a few errors.
The then needs to be a than
There needs to be an a to make pointers
We needs to be we'll or add will after we
Its needs to be it's in this case. I got confused with it to, but it's is it is and its is plural
Overall great story man
Thanks for the feed back
11026651
Welcome