Catastrophic Adventures

by -Pinkamena_Pie-

Invasion

God, it hurts me to even do any of this. I guess it's a test of my willpower, but it still hurts. Bonesy is flying around me, not liking where this is going.

I'm making the skeletons and zombies swarm them. Apparently I'm too much of a tactical mastermind, though, since they're still struggling... I haven't even let out Skelly-boy or summoned the blood moon yet.

And now my sis is coming towards me. She looks like she doesn't want to do this, but motherbucking Yharim is making us! I don't want to kill my sister... I don't...

And it doesn't help that the other version of me in Candy is stronger... I'm bloody useless, I can't even give my sis the blade...

And now I'm sparkling. Yharim wants me for somethi- Wait. Hehehe... Perfect opportunity... Whoops.

Use it well, Sis...

---

"Wait, I thought there were only two arms?"

"Not exactly."

Heh, motherbucker thought I didn't plan for this? I'm a willing host, shit-for-brains.

"Skelly-boy has so much more power at his disposal that can be called upon by a willing host. Itonic as that is..."

Sorry, a bit mad that the newbies decided to not realize I didn't want this and tried to kill me.

Yeah, Skelly-boy's free. I gotta give him credit for being able to come up with one-liners. Might even come to like him somewhat.

Now I gotta deal with that Pegasus and the little birdie. They're not my sis, so I don't feel too guilty about killing them if I do by accident. Keep two arms at the ready for birdie, distract Darkie with the other two. Only kill if necess- Motherbucking explosives, really? Bone wall that shit, send that after her. Should keep the chickadee busy.

Skelly's summoning the blood moon. That's normal... Wait, what the hell? He's planning something...

Oh mare, this is gonna suck... Sis, be safe... Skelly just turned into 4 of himself and I'm not sure even you can fight this...

Okay, really? A bad time? Come on now, if you're gonna make this a crossover, have the tag. It's just plain respect.

Aaaand there goes every chance in Tartarus that they had. Dammit, Skelly-boy, if my sister dies, I will never stop torturing you, I hope you know that.

Oh, calm yourself, pony. I'm sure this won't be too much of a problem for them to deal with. After all, if I was truly using my full power, they would have been dead where they stand.

I am going to break your bones. Stop making Undertale references, that book is on hold!

What's wrong? Are they too Sansational for you?

...

What? Annoying Dog got your tongue?

I am going to take twice as much joy from killing you as I was before.

ANYWAYS. I think I need to put on a show for Yharim before he gets bored. Guess I'll grab these and fight my sis...

"Those are my Bloody Ruptures! How did you-"

No time for questions, sis, we need to move on, else you really will die... And Candy needs to go. I don't need her to be involved.

"We're still connected when it comes to our inventory, sis. Whatever you and I have stored there can be accessed by both of us, even with our current... condition. Candy, leave me and my sister to our own conflict. You seem to understand my current situation and I know you'd do the same if it was your sister whose life was on the line. Go on and help the others, they'll need it. And get Shy to hurry up with the big motherbucking slimes."

Alright, sis... Get out your Muramasa. I don't want to hurt you, so you need to fight me. There you go.

Hey, wait a sec, what's with calling me Candymena, Pomp? Seriously??? Messing me up with her already? Jeez...

"Here I come, Mena!"

And you hesitated... Okay, you need to learn not to, even for me.

"Two things, sis. First off..."

Give her a little bit of a kick to remind her not to tell everypony what she plans, and give her a bit of a scare. Make sure not to actually hurt her, though, I would never forgive myself for it.

"Don't ever tell your enemy you're about to attack. Secondly, never hesitate to fight your enemy, even if they used to be a friend or family member. Yharim ain't here, but he's always watching."

Damn twisted motherbucking dung-licker...

"So we need to put on a good show for him. I just hope you can forgive me..."

I guess I'll use this to train a bit... I don't want to hurt her, but I may as well get a bit of practice in. I've gotten rusty with my knife skills...

---

Okay, did I just hear a Skyrim shout? I did, didn't I. Use the crossover tag, dammit...

"Ooh! I love that shout! I especially love to use it to send giants off a cliff-"

Oh joy. She is exactly like my sis. Also, I think Skelly-boy is confused now.

Pony, what in Terraria is she talking about?

Don't worry about it, Skelly-boy. Just keep doing your thing.

Okay, good. I got worried Yharim would get bored there. Actually, scratch that, the bucker is probably laughing his plot off. Where the hell is Bonesy... Oh, there he is. I think that weirdo guy over there who's sneaking towards the dungeon froze up for a sec when he saw him. Eh, whatever. I could kill you, but I don't need that place anymore. Go on, buddy. Keep being a 'great' thief.

Oh good, that's a new one. Apparently Skelly can regen. Nice mechanic, Fargo.

Sis, you really need to keep your guard up- OH BUCK DID I HURT HER THERE?!?!?

Buck, buck, buck... Please be okay, please be okay... Oh thank the Light Goddess...

Okay, they need to get a damn hint...

"Like that wizard dude said, you can't beat Skelly or the limbs by physical means. However, my sis has the key."

I should mind-link quick, try to tell my sis about it. That should help.

---

W-Wait, Mena, is this where I think it is?

"It sure is. We're using that mind-link trick, so I gave us a peaceful background, make you feel a bit more comfortable."

"Ooooh, it'sbeen a while since we used this! I think the last time was in the SCP universe. I guess it'strue that Terraria isn't the first universe we've been thrown into.

Sis, I love you so much... I'll make him pay for what he's done. Even if I have to take myself out with him.

"We should tell everypony about our adventures once the Skelly problem is dealt with. But right now, I have a lot I need to tell you, and we don't have much time."

Skelly-boy is watching... I won't say anything about that yet.

"Doesn't time shift when we're in here?"

"It does, but not out there in the real world. Around this time, we're only a few seconds away from having our blades clash together. Once that happens, the link will break on us, so we have five minutes, give or take. Don't worry, I don't get it either."

Just like I don't get why Yharim is doing this... There's gotta be a reason other than his depression. I should try to figure it out... Might help me decide whether I give him a slow or quick death.

"Okay. When we get back to the real world, I want you to kick me as hard as you can when the blades collide. Yharim is watching every single move, so if it looks like I let you win, he'll kill you right then and there. He's got a sick sense of entertainment, sicker than mine back in the day..."

Even if he has a reason, I'm still gonna kill him. I was called the Butcher of Ponyville for a reason...

"Once you do that, I'll take the fall and make it look like you took me out. When you hit me, sis, hit me with all your strength, no holding back. I don't wanna be able to walk properly for the next three days cause of the pain, alright? After that, you need to use the sword that I 'dropped' on Skelly-boy and his limbs. That thing can destroy and imprison spirits, so I wasn't kidding when I said you hold the key to winning."

You gotta do this, sis... Holy crap, I think even Skelly-boy got hit right in the feels with this. Yeah, yeah, glare at me and wipe your eye sockets, tough guy.

"I-I'm sorry, Mena... Because of my weakness you-"

NO. It's not your fault. It never was your fault.

"What did I tell you before, sis? You are not responsible for any of this. I would go to Tartarus and become the Crimson King's bride for you; If bending to some depressed jerk's will keeps you safe, so be it. I ain't gonna blame you for any of this, stop blaming yourself. If anything, I was the one who failed to protect you. It'smy fault, not yo-"

Damnit, sis, now of all times? You always were a touchy-feely mare, I guess.

"I love you so much, Mena..."

"Love you too, sis.. We've only got a minute left, so let me say this: Everything that I do, I do for you and ONLY you. I want you to be happy, with your friends, with your life. I was happy myself, back before that Raspberry guy showed up. I got to watch you grow as a mare, become the Element of Laughter! I couldn't be prouder of you."

Sis... Don't cry, please... And no, Pomp, I'm not gonna sing. I despise singing. Also, I suck at it, a fact you probably didn't know, heh...

I'm just gonna hug her... Might be the last time I can...

Damnit, we're starting to separate from the link... never enough time.

"Oh, Mena... At least they're watching... Hi humans."

"Yeah. They want me to tell you, sis, that you're a strong mare, even without me. You can do whatever you put your mind to, I promise."

"We switched places... Before, it was you trying to save me... Now, I need to find a way to save you."

"Heh. You're not ready yet... But soon, I know you will be."

Damnit, just give me a few more seconds!

Just... a few... more...

---

C'mon, sis, do what I said... A bit more strength, you'll get it, there ya g-

---

I'm surprised you didn't reveal to her that I was in that mind-link of yours as well.

It's a precaution. We can't let Yharim catch onto our deal, he'd kill her in a heartbeat.

Hm... I don't honestly care about your sister, but valid point nonetheless.

That's not how you were behaving in the mind-link, now was it?

I blame your petty emotions and the fact that you are currently my host.

Even the homicidal giant skeleton can't stop emotions from bothering him, eh?

I would prefer if you stopped ragging on me for it, else I may have to make more puns to tickle your funny bone.

Touche.

I just hope that losing ninety-nine percent of my powers for your plan is worth it. I won't be at full-strength for a few days, so I hope you know what you're doing. For both our sakes.

Like I said, I'm playing chess against a grandmaster. There's at least a chance it works, right?

How reassuring...

---

Buck, that one actually hurt... Take stock of the situation... I'm going to hurt you for that, Skelly-boy.

Must keep up appearances, yes? Besides, she's fine. One of the Terrarians managed to save her.

Well, let's make sure she's alright.

"-aside from that, though, she's good. In fact, she should be helping your friends up there in-"

Well, I never said I was stealthy.

"Pinkie Pie's sister, I presume?"

"Pinka... Mena... I'm so happy... to know... you're... okay..."

She took that one hard... At least she's not dead...

"Thanks for saving her. Though, without the Muramasa, I doubt any of you have a chance to kill Skelly for good."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that."

Is he... laughing?

"Hope isn't lost yet, Pinkamena. Both for us and for you."

"What are you suggesting...? Pretty sure you can't steal back my sister's life force from Yharim very easily."

"Thanks to your sister, we know that you're being forced to do all of this in order to save her. Yharim is a cruel and traitorous monstrosity. I guess what I'm trying to say is: Celestia and I know your current predicament all too well, especially Celestia. I take it that Yharim has revealed to you about what he’s done to Lunaris?”

"Yeah, he told me about it. I heard everything Twilight told my sister from inside her psyche when we were still linked together, too."

Lunaris... That's the Lunatic Cultist guy, isn't it? Wonder why I haven't seen him yet. Is he still a slave of Yharim's?

It scares me that all the others seem to enjoy working for him. I don't know why they do... What if I start liking it?

What if I kill my own sister... I... I don't know...

Calm down, Mena, Pinkie's okay, and you are your own pony. Noone controls you. NOONE.

"That sounds about right. Like you and Pinkie Pie, Celestia’s brother means the absolute world to her. She would die if it meant that he could be free from Yharim’s grasp. I would do the same for both of them as well. You probably don’t need me to tell you this but I shall make you this vow and if Celestia were here with us, she’d do the same."

A vow? Never had anyone do that for me...

“I, Sai Sahan, hereby vow to watch over your sister in your absence. I’m sure that you’ll be forced to commit heinous acts in servitude to Yharim, in order to protect her. Know this, we shall never call you a monster no matter what happens next. A monster would commit foul deeds for pure enjoyment and selfish reasons. You, on the other hand - or hoof - do it in order to save the one you love. That alone earns my eternal respect.”

Heh... Heheh... If you knew my past, you would never respect me. But thanks anyways.

"...Thank you. There's still the fact the Muramasa flew Light-Goddess-knows-where."

"Light Goddess...? Perhaps I will ask at a later time. As I said before, all hope is not lost. Keep watching for this will all be over soon."

I kinda dou- Welp, nevermind, I guess. Ouch... Good thing I placed my bet on Home Town winning.

---

This is fine.

Eheh... Yeah, fine.

This is naught but a clone. I live on thanks to you. I simply hope that you truly do allow me to get my hands on that imbecile Yharim.

A promise is a promise, Skelly-boy. I'm serious, right down to the bone.

Hmm... Well-played.

Thanks, Skelly-boy.

So what next?

Well, judging by the mechanical limbs, Yharim doesn't trust me to come back on my own.

Hmph.

"Mena!"

Kinda funny how Sai cares about me after I nearly murdered all of Home Town, but eh...

"No, it’s alright.. Yharim's probably making sure I get back to the hideout 'safely'. I guess he doesn’t trust me enough to return on my own, heheheh. Just make sure you protect my sis, Sai! All of you make sure to protect her from this point on!"

---

Well, that was a trip.

Hello again, puppet. We have a talk to have, you, Skelly, and I.

Oh. Buck.

Author's Note:

Owwwwwww my wrists. ;-;

Hope you enjoyed this extra long chapter. I wanted to wait for the Skeletron boss fight to be done, and I also wanted to experiment with a newer writing style. When Mena shows up next, chapters will return to normal!

Comments

[Pomp-Neigh]

Well done!
Lol, I just love the sight of making Mena sing.
Also, good prediction at the end there because you will indeed have a talk with Yharim.

[Loganic]

Undertale puns? I’m taking even more now.