Catastrophic Adventures

by -Pinkamena_Pie-

An Unfortubone Incident

I can't believe that motherbucker actually did it. I really am just a tool to him, huh. Skelly-boy isn't too happy about it either, to be honest.

That nickname annoys me, pony. The only reason I am currently speaking to you whatsoever is because we share a common enemy.

Yeah, yeah, big talk for someone who's just as much of a slave as me right now. Look, we've gotta figure something out here. Since I warned that Candy gal, you're going to have the entire town attacking you, not just my sis and our friends.

You dare doubt my power? I will destroy that town and burn it all to ashes!

Touch my sister and not even all the undead of the world will save you.

Now. As I was saying. You need a way to survive, we both want Yharim to die. So. I'm not gonna release you fully. Just enough to make it look like you're released, mortal body, that sort of thing. It should be so close to being entirely free that Yharim won't realize it. You're gonna go through the agony that involves getting butchered, and then you'll die... Or so Yharim will think. After all, he didn't make it clear what I should do with you.

And why do you think such a being like myself will do as you say?

Because either way, you're getting butchered. It's just one way, you die for good, and another... You survive to get your vengeance on Yharim. Kapiche?

Hmph. Very well, little pony. We shall see if your friends can defeat me.

Great. Now get comfortable, it's gonna be a while. Unless I get another one of you bosses shoved into me, then it's gonna get cramped, but whatever.

Don't worry, guys. I've got this, I think. It's just like a chess game, except I'm both the grandmaster and the piece at the same time. I just have to outplay someone who's been playing the game for years longer than me, knows all my weaknesses, and can crush my sister in a single move.

...On second thought, that didn't come out as well as I would've liked it.

What are you even talking to, pony? You look unfathomably stupid.

...Some friends, Skelly. Nothing else. Oh, hey, Bonesy. Who's a good boy, hm? Who's a good dungeon guardian? Mhm, you are. Yes, you are!

Sorry. That was Bonesy. A dungeon guardian I kinda made and decided to keep as a pet. Doesn't seem like Yharim is complaining, so might as well have my own personal guard skull. Not like I'm gonna protect the dungeon with it.

Anyways. I have to get prepared. I'll talk to you guys tomorrow.

Comments

[Pomp-Neigh]

[prism heart]

considering that a dungeon guardian is normally able to one shot any non invincible character that is fucking scary.

[Pomp-Neigh]

10638542
Oh yes indeed!

[HB_DS2013]

That was hilarious.