Chapter 10: The West in Town
Cozy Glow, Chrysalis, and Tirek continued to drive across the hot desert parts of Equestrian landscape to their next destination. Previously, they had two thirds of their map complete. Now all that was left was to conduct their experiment in one more remote location, in order to pinpoint the exact location of the Rainbow of Darkness. They were really excited, as you can tell.
"And to think, after we perform this experiment one more time-" Cozy started.
"We'll know the precise location of the Rainbow of Darkness." Chrysalis said.
"And once we find it, and it's in our clutches-" Tirek said.
"Twilight Sparkle won't know what hit her." Cozy said.
The three laughed simultaneously. Their ride however started to slow down.
"Why is the vehicle slowing down!?" Chrysalis cried.
The car slowed, until it came to a complete stop.
Cozy turned the ignition key multiple times, but the car had had it.
"I knew we shouldn't have trusted something built by those cheapskate Flim Flam brothers." Chrysalis said.
"Well, I guess I ought to inspect the vehicle, and see what went wrong." Cozy put on a repairpony cap, and flew underneath the car.
The two waited a moment, and then Cozy came back to give her diagnosis.
"So, what's the damage?" Chrysalis asked.
"Good news, there's nothing wrong with the vehicle. But the bad news, it's out of fuel!" Cozy said.
"And in the middle of nowhere too! This is just swell!" Chrysalis ranted.
"Luckily for us, Flim and Flam documented how this vehicle works in this handy book. So if there's a solution, it's bound to be in here." Cozy looked in the instruction manual, and she made a surprising discover. "It says here, this vehicle runs on *page flip* apple cider?!"
"I have no idea how that's possible." Chrysalis said.
Tirek looked into the tank, and saw that it was indeed dripping apple cider. He did a taste test to make sure.
"Mmm. But it appears to be true." Tirek said.
"No wonder this things smells like that apple pony of Twilight..." Chrysalis said.
With the car down, the three found themselves stranded in the middle of a desert. But not the middle of nowhere thankfully.
"It's the middle of day, no stars to help us navigate." Tirek said.
"We don't need stars. Look, there's a town not to far." Cozy pointed.
"Not just any town, it's-" Chrysalis started.
"Appleloosa." the three said simultaneously.
"The town of which was the sight of the great pony and *** feud." Cozy recapped.
"The town I invaded and stole magic from." Tirek reminisced.
"This dump..." Chrysalis moaned.
"Hmm, Appleloosa. Apple cider?" Chrysalis thought.
"If Appleloosa doesn't have apple cider, then I'm a monkey's uncle." Tirek said.
"Landing ourselves here could be a blessing in disguise..." Cozy thought out loud.
Cozy Glow did some thinking.
Some time later, Cozy had a full plan.
"Here's the plan. We're going to infiltrate the town, and help ourselves to as much apple cider as possible!" Cozy said. "Now, Tirek, since it's harder for you to blend in, you'll stay here and guard the vehicle and machine."
"Hmmph. I'd much rather barge into town, take all their magic, and their cider." Tirek said.
"Breaking and terrorizing villages isn't our thing anymore." Cozy said. "Rather, Chrysalis and I are gonna slither into town, and find the biggest deposit of apple cider."
"Ooh. I get to design my own cowpony OC!" Chrysalis gleed.
"I thought you hated this sort of culture." Tirek said.
"Doesn't mean I can't be *transform* fashionable." Chrysalis transformed into a sexy cowpony girl.
"Now, we need to get you something to wear, so you're better well hidden." Chrysalis said.
Cozy and Chrysalis happened to "find" an appropriate disguise for Cozy. She wore a leather vest, with a handkerchief that matched her yellow bow's color. But instead of the bow on her head, she wore a 10 gallon hat. It was noticeably big on her, but it helped conceal her hair and face, so it worked in her favor. She wore pants to hide her cutie mark and flank.
Cozy liked the outfit. It seemed to suit her perfectly. She felt so cute, she pressed her hooves against her cheeks.
"Golly! I feel like the high horsin' kick ass cowgirl filly on this side'a Equestria!" Cozy said. "Ah reckon we're a ready to mingle with these here cowfolk!" Cozy said.
Chrysalis was disguised as a typical mare in cowpony getup.
They explored the town. It's what you'd expect from Appleloosa.
"This town is despicable." Chrysalis said. "There are horse drawn carriages drawings, drawn by horses drawing horse drawn carriages!"
"I don't know how long we've been gone, but it feels like this town has somehow regressed in progress in the mean time." Cozy said.
After some exploring they made an interesting discovery. Cozy spotted a wanted poster, depicting three familiar faces.
"Okay, you know the trope where the wanted posters are inaccurate and unflattering? Well, trope averted. These are actually very well down drawings of us." she said.
"Wow, I agree. The penmanship on these are spot on." Chrysalis admired. "They really captured my beauty and my fury."
"I'm keeping one of these..." Cozy grabbed a poster and slipped it into her vest.
"We're losing track of our mission. Where are we going to find apple cider..." Chrysalis said.
They saw a colt drinking a glass bottle of apple cider.
"Eye spy with my little eye." Cozy said.
"Excuse me, sir." Chrysalis shouted to them.
The colt ignored them.
*HISS* Chrysalis lunged and pounced on top of the colt. "Reveal to me where you procured this bottle of apple cider!" she demanded.
The colt pointed at a building, which turned out to be the local pub.
"Much obliged." Cozy said.
Chrysalis got off the colt, and slowly trotted off with Cozy. The colt ran off in fear.
Cozy and Chrysalis enter saloon.
*gasp*
There was an audible gasp. In fact, everypony in the bar looked at them, and gave scorns.
"The obviously don't know it's us, they probably just greet all new guests this way." Chrysalis whispered.
"Follow my lead." Cozy whispered.
They walked all tough like to the counter. They sat on the bar stool, and looked the bartender in the eyes. Cozy spit into the spittoon. Except due to her inexperience, she wasn't very good at spitting. Chrysalis tried spitting too, but she ended up just drooling all over herself. The bartender gave them an awkward look, but spoke anyway.
"Uh... what'll it be, fellas?" he asked.
"I'll take all the apple cider you got!" Cozy said.
*gasp* Everypony in the saloon gasped again.
"All mah cider?" he asked.
"Did mah pardner stutter?! All of it!" Chrysalis exclaimed.
"See this here barrel behind me? It's all the cider I got." he said.
"We'll take the whole barrel!" Chrysalis shouted.
"Alrighty. How much bits have ya' got?" he asked.
"Uh..." they wondered.
"No money, no cider." he said.
"We may not have bits, but perhaps we could trade with you something you want." Cozy said.
"Hmm. Tell ya what. You see this here poster?" the bartender pointed to a copy of the familiar poster. "Some refer to them as the Legion of Doom. Queen Chrysalis, Lord Tirek, and Cozy Glow. These three lawbreakers are on the loose, and they have a massive bounty over their heads. You bring me all three of them, and the barrel's yours."
Cozy and Chrysalis were in a predicament. Do they turn themselves in for a barrel of cider? They needed something in order to refuel the vehicle to carry their machine across the land.
"Hold up!" Chrysalis spoke up. "Catching three notorious criminals seems like a tall order for just one large barrel of cider!"
"Yeah, I reckon' we ought'a get the key to the city for such an accomplishment!" Cozy added.
*sigh* "Fine, bring me just one of them, and the barrel's yours." he said.
"We'll be think'in about 'yer offer." Cozy said.
Chrysalis and Cozy got up and exited.
The two left town and walked back to where they left Tirek and the car.
"Hmm, what are we gonna do?" Chrysalis wondered.
"Obviously we're not going to do exactly what he says, but there has to be a way to get that barrel without stirring a ruckus." Cozy said.
"HAHAHAH!" laughed Tirek and someone unfamiliar.
"What the?" they said simultaneously.
"And so that's when I said 'You have to choose! Your friends, or yoru magic!' And Twilight Sparkle nearly wet herself in fear!" Tirek joked.
"Hahahaha!" he laughed along with an extra guest. "What kind of pony would risk their lives for Applejack? Ridiculous!" they said.
"Who's your friend, Tirek?" Cozy asked.
"This is King Longhorn, leader of the something somes." Tirek introduced.
"And what business does he have here?" Chrysalis asked.
"He happened to pass by, and it turns out, he's had a long feud with Twilight Sparkle too."
"That apple pony has foiled far too many of my plans." Longhorn said.
"You know what I've noticed? Applejack was really good at making enemies. Flim and Flam, Svengallop, and now King Longhorn." Cozy said.
"If you've been enemies with those ponies for so long, how come I've never heard of you?" Chrysalis asked.
They didn't listen however, Tirek was sitting joking with King Longhorn, while Cozy thought about their mission.
"We know where they're keeping the cider. We just need a way to get it." Cozy said. "But pony wants it in exchange for our bounty."
"Are all of us necessary for this operation?" Chrysalis asked.
"Yes! All of us are important to this mission." Tirek affirmed.
"Why play by their rules anyway? I'm a snake who tightropes over a fine line of illegal activity. But you three are super villains." Longhorn said. "You could just glare at a pony, and they'd probably explode."
"Longhorn's right. We're breaking into town and stealing it." Tirek said.
"No. I have a plan, Cozy said. "Mr. Longhorn, you got backup?"
"But of course. My rustlers and I are a force to be reckoned with." he said.
"That's perfect. I think I know a way Longhorn and his cohorts can help." Cozy said.
Some time later in town, a scene was brewing.
*oof* Cozy was knocked to the ground, and her hat fell off.
"You traitor!" Cozy exclaimed.
"Yer time is up, Cozy Glow! You ain't got nowhere left to hide!" said Chrysalis, disguised as a normal cowpony.
The local authorities had arrived on the scene.
"After all we've been through, you go ahead and do this to me!" Cozy exclaimed.
"It is clear that you were the weakest link. Officers, book 'er!" Chrysalis said.
Cozy was hoofcuffed by Star Spur and Fetter Keys.
"Gah! You haven't seen the last of me!" Cozy cried.
Cozy was carried away by the local authorities.
"Thank you ma'am for your great act of justice." Sheriff Silverstar said to the pony.
"I know them other two are still on the loose, but I don't suppose you can at least spare a portion of the bounty. Catching Cozy Glow ought'a be worth a lot of bits." Chrysalis said.
"Certainly. The reward money's yours." Sheriff Silverstar said.
"Actually, make it out to the local pub owner." Chrysalis said.
"Whatever you say, ma'am." Silverstar said.
"Wowee. Thanks, I really owe ya." the owner said.
"Yes, you do. I believe we discussed this earlier." she said.
"But of course. With such a large reward given to me, I'm set for life. The cider's all yours." the owner said.
A couple of ponies rolled in a cart carrying a big barrel of cider.
"Much obliged." Chrysalis grinned.
Cozy was carted, and locked up in the jail cell.
*sob* "I just wanted a second chance." Cozy cried.
"Well, maybe you oughta think twice before committing a great crime." the sheriff said.
"How could you do this to a filly?" Cozy asked.
"You ma'am, committed treason of the highest level!" Silverstar said. "Do you have any idea what would'a happened had you banished all the magic in Equestria?"
"I know! That's why I tried to do it!" Cozy exclaimed.
"You'll get your chance, missy." Silverstar said. "Once Princess Twilight Sparkle sees 'ya, she'll decide your next punishment And whoo-ee. If a life in stone wasn't punishment enough for ya', I can only imagine what she has cooked up for you next."
Silverstar took the key with him, and left the building.
"Heh heh." Cozy laughed. "Oh you have no idea what's next for me."
A few minutes later, Cozy stuck her head through the barred window.
*whistle* she whistled.
Someone outside tied ropes to the bars, and started to pull. It was Longhorn's cattle rustlers. They pulled on the rope until.
*bam*
They brought down the entire wall, freeing Cozy Glow. Although she still was wearing the hoofcuffs.
"Excellent work, gentlemen." Cozy grinned.
Cozy easily escaped the jail, thanks to Longhorn's rustlers.
Cozy rode on the backs of one of the cattle rustlers, to location of their vehicle.
"Howdy partner." Chrysalis said.
"That was a great act. We should take up playwriting." Cozy said.
The barrel of cider was already there.
"What'd I say? My rustlers can tear down just'a 'bout any wall these ponies build." Longhorn said.
"I know we just met, but don't get too well acquainted. We got what we came here for." Cozy said. "Now help me load the cider into the tank so we can get the heck out of here."
"Well, it was great speaking with ya, King." Tirek said.
They rolled the cart with the tank into position. They attached a pipe protruding from the vehicle into the barrel's opening. Cozy turned a valve on the vehicle, and cider started pumping in.
"I still have no idea how cider is converted into motion energy." Chrysalis said. "Have Flim and Flam solved the energy crisis by creating a renewable energy source? And if so, how has this not revolutionized Equestria?"
"Eh. It's convenient, so don't question it." Cozy said.
After a few moments, the cider stopped flowing.
"Tank's full!" Chrysalis said.
"Perfect!" Cozy said. Sh climbed into the driver's seat, and turned the key.
"It's a shame ya have to leave so soon." Longhorn said.
Cozy turned the key, however, the engine made... not good noises.
"Uh... We may not be leavin' soon after all..." Cozy said, worried.
"That sounds bad." Tirek said.
"Why not? We did everything properly." Chrysalis asked.
"Is something else broken?" Longhorn asked.
"Let's read the instructions manual." Cozy opened the car's glove box and read the manual.
"It says here, if the car's having trouble after refueling, to try turning the key while the car is rolling at a moderate speed." Cozy read.
"There are no hills to roll the car down, it's flat land for miles." Chrysalis said.
"So we're gonna have to push the car ourselves." Tirek said.
Basically, the car would only start if it was already rolling at decent speed.
"We could strap the car to the front of a moving train! I saw it in a movie once." Chrysalis said.
"I think you guys are missing the obvious solution." Cozy said, looking at Longhorn. "We need to get the car to a rolling start, and you and your rustlers are more than cut out for the job."
"Why, it would be an honor to help a fellow group of fellow anti-authority bad doers such as yourselves." Longhorn said.
Longhorn tied a rope to the vehicle, and held the other end.
Cozy, Chrysalis, and Tirek were on the vehicle.
"You're going to pull the vehicle forward. We'll give you a sign when the engine starts, that's when you detach, and we head on out." Cozy said.
"Ready?" Tirek asked.
"Freeze!" the sheriff exclaimed.
"Oh, shoot!" Longhorn said.
"It's all three of 'em!" Fetter Keys said.
"Y'all are under arrest!" Silverstar exclaimed.
"What? No!" Chrysalis transformed into a pony. "I am but a humble cowfolk!"
"It's the end of the line for y'all!" the sheriff said.
"I don't think so! Heeyah!" Cozy flicked the rope.
Longhorn and a couple of his steers started pulling the car.
"Oof! No offense, but y'all a heavy load!" he said.
"We're gonna have to lighten the load." Chrysalis said.
"Oh, fine." Tirek said.
Tirek hopped out of the car, and pushed the car from behind.
"How fast can ya run centaur boy?" Longhorn asked.
"I don't know, it's been a millennium since gym." Tirek said.
Behind them, were a cavalcade of stagecoaches. Sheriff Silverstar commanded a lead stagecoach, while his deputies rode their own stagecoaches behind him.
"Ol' Tire's pretty vulnerable outside of the vehicle." Cozy said.
"Mah boys got our backs!" Longhorn said.
King Longhorn's henchmen followed and provided backup to fight against the stagecoaches. What followed suit was a high octane chase. Silverstar and his stagecoaches chasing down a car pulled by King Longhorn, and pushed by Tirek. Chrysalis transformed to normal, and went on the offensive.
*pew* She shot magic at the carriages.
Fetter Keys swerved around and dodged the blasts. The stagecoaches were throwing rocks.
"They're pelting us with stones!" Chrysalis cried.
"Very crude, and yet, it hurts!" Cozy cried.
Cozy grabbed whatever rocks she could and tried to throw them back.
*pant* "Don't worry, my crew will provide us backup. Angus! Buff! Doc! Jersey!
Angus McSteer, Buffalo Bill, Doc Holstein, Jersey Shore. Angus went toe to toe with the horse pulling Silver Spur's chariot.
"Get outta here ya varmint!" Spur cried.
Buffalo Bill tried to take out the wheels of Fetter Keys' carriage. Doc came from behind and tried to just plain break it.
"I'mma try something risky." Silver Spur said. He passed the rope tried to the lead horse to his right hand pony. He pulled down his hat, and leaped onto Angus.
Angus stopped in the chase, and tried to buck Spur off.
"Woowee! This is like one of my rodeos!" he said.
Jersey Shore came in, but a single rock to the face took down the steer.
By this point, they were going at quite the speed. Chrysalis tried turning the keys, and finally the engine started.
"We got the engine rolling! Now we need to floor it and get out of here." she said.
"Hold up!" Sheriff Silverstar had jumped aboard, and held Cozy hostage. "You turn yourselves in, or the little one gets it!" he said.
"Don't come forward Chryssie. It's too risky!" Cozy said.
"No! I refuse to let him do this to you!" Chrysalis said.
*phew* "Why is my head getting all... heavy..." Silverstar breathed heavy.
Tirek sapped the magic from Silverstar. Chrysalis used her magic to snag Silverstar's keys. Tirek leaped up and climbed aboard.
"Do we eat the sheriff, or yeet the sheriff?" Chrysalis asked.
"We have enough hostages. Yeet." Cozy said.
Tirek grabbed Sheriff Silverstar, and threw him off the car.
"Ahh!" he cried.
*crash*
Silverstar landed against one of the carriages. It lost control, and bumped into another driven by Fetter Keys. They both crashed. And like that, all the carriages were gone.
"Good luck you three on your endeavours!" King Longhorn said, tipping his hat.
"Farewell, Longhorn." Tirek said.
"Thank you for your service!" Cozy said.
They sped away in the car and fled the scene. Chrysalis unlocked Cozy Glow from the hoofcuffs.
"Thank you, Chrysssie." Cozy hugged Chrysalis. "That was such a great team effort by us!"
Chrysalis gave Cozy an odd look.
*ahem* "I mean, thanks." she said, backing away while blushing.
And so our three villains sped off to their next location.
.
.
.
Some time later, the local authorities met in the sheriff's office with an even higher authority.
"I saw 'em, sir. All three of 'em!" Silverstar said.
"They escaped on some kind of motor powered doohickey!" Star Spur said.
"You gotta do something, captain." Fetter Keys said.
The shrouded royal guard captain.
"Mmm hmm. Which way were they heading?" squawked a raspy voice.
The mysterious guard grabbed a knife with their talons, and sliced one of the wanted posters in half.
To be continued...
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I think you might be missing something here.
10060166
The point of this sentence is to hide the identity of the new captain of the royal guard. A bit of foreshadowing for later.
10060253
It feels incomplete though, generally sentences have to refer to what a object is doing or otherwise find a way to tie the sentence in with the rest of the story in order to hold the audience's interest when describing it.
10060274
Now that I take a closer look, this sentence is definitely incomplete. I’m an amateur and oddities like this slip by me all the time.
10060345
No problem, happens to us all.
I would like to take the time to thank you for writing this story. Out of all the writers that write Cozy Glow their are few who would bother to write her plans and fewer still that write plans that could conceivably come from her. This is one of the few stories that gets that aspect of the character right and I appreciate it.
I'm getting Sly Cooper vibes from this chapter
YEET lol