“I swear, if one more kid touches me to see what my skin feels like, I’ll fucking kill them,” Rough Diamond muttered, sitting on her seat. She also had a disguise – a baseball cap and a t-shirt saying ‘I love Manehattan’.
I have felt like murdering a child often.
Flash facehoofed. Rough Diamond had been mopey since they got on the train and he slowly realised that his disguise—an old, white suit and fake moustache—as well as the company of two young fillies made him look like a middle-aged pimp way past his prime.
...or a pedo depending on the kind of stache he's got.
“You could’ve told them that before someone hit me with a club and locked me in the caboose,” Rough Diamond muttered.
But you wouldn't have learned.
“Then you wouldn’t learn,” Flurry said. She looked around the train station, trying to stretch her wings under the vest without anypony noticing. “Also, they wanted to kick you out of the train, but we were in the mountains.”
Exactly.
“Around twelve,” Flurry replied. “I once got it up to twenty-five, but I didn’t feel like making a hundred wing push-ups, a hundred sit-ups, a hundred squats, and ten kilometres running every day to keep that.”
So she doesn't wanna be One Punch Mare? Probably for the best. It's a boring show anyway.
“It’s pizza.” Flurry blushed.
You could always try my cousin Luke's weight loss method: Liquid Meth
“We’re not going to a party!” Flash exclaimed. He’d spent quite a while hanging around in the store and being given suspicious looks by a group of raccoons. Needless to say, this didn’t improve his mood at all.
Bitch please you know you're going.
Flurry turned back to look at Flash. She had to give him credit – he got rid of the suit, but still, his idea of what teenagers wore was at least twenty years behind. He even had a skateboard.
So...he just looks like a huge faggot?
Before anyone gets pissy about that,1 I'm bi and therefore I'm aloud to say that word as part of the reclamation process,and 2 AHEM: faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot.
Flash rushed down the street. He still had a vague idea that he shouldn’t have let Flurry go to the party and in fact, he didn’t exactly know why he did that. What was worse, he’d seen her running away with a bunch of suspicious individuals. Some of them were bat ponies too.
Racist.
Flash had nothing against bat ponies in general. However, experience taught him that drinking with the members of Luna’s Guard could easily end in a gutter, without the wallet, and with the taste of vomit, bad decisions, and mangoes still in his mouth.
So can drinking with anyone else Flash...you racist dick.
“Get down and cover your ears!” Flurry aimed her horn at the wall. “We’re get–” She dropped on the ground, hit by the stunning spell from Babs’ crystal gun.
I feel like the grammar and sentence structure in this chapter is of lower quality than the last few chapters. Was it written on your phone, or . . . what?
9965500 No I mean Flash is likely to get fired over this, not Babs. He lost Flurry, got tasered by the cops because he didn't bring any method of identifying himself as a Royal Guard, and then let Flurry take part in morally dubious if not outright illegal activities, during which she exposed herself as a princess and got arrested.
The PR backlash alone would probably be enough to get him canned.
On another note, given Sombra's hard on for it, you'd think the Crystal Empire guards would be better hardened agains mind control.
The train rolled across the hills. Flurry, used to the luxurious train her family used whenever going to an official visit, found the travel rather slow, but it didn’t matter much. Aside from her and her entourage, none of the ponies in the carriage were from the Crystal Empire – in fact, most of them were from Vanhoover. Thus, no one recognised her in the vest hiding her wings and a pair....(of)….. large glasses obscuring her face.
Good luck, with that jack of diamonds and two of clubs, Flurry thought. She also learned that the old mare’s name was Royal Card and that she used to play cards on a casino by the lake about sixty year ago; apparently she drank all the whisky, banged all the stallions, and then someone burned down the casino by casting a spell that lit the ceiling on fire. The memories of smoke over the water were suddenly interrupted by the old mare thinking that it’d be fun to bang the changeling. The mental image made Flurry blush. She quickly left the old mare’s head and decided to check what was going on with the big stallion.
First rule of childhood Whatever happens, it's worse when your parents fins out
Damn it Flurry! You attack and then you do the one liner, not the other way around!
I have felt like murdering a child often.
...or a pedo depending on the kind of stache he's got.
But you wouldn't have learned.
Exactly.
So she doesn't wanna be One Punch Mare?
Probably for the best. It's a boring show anyway.
You could always try my cousin Luke's weight loss method: Liquid Meth
Bitch please you know you're going.
So...he just looks like a huge faggot?
Before anyone gets pissy about that,1 I'm bi and therefore I'm aloud to say that word as part of the reclamation process,and 2 AHEM: faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot faggot.
Racist.
So can drinking with anyone else Flash...you racist dick.
...Say goodbye to your job.
Hilarious as always.
neat chapter, keep it up.
can someone say grounded?
Ooh, Flurry Heart, you are gonna get it!
Does Babs contract have the "yeah" thing on it?
I feel like the grammar and sentence structure in this chapter is of lower quality than the last few chapters. Was it written on your phone, or . . . what?
9964330
I may have forgotten to give it another editing pass, I guess.
9963694
Yeah
9963586
9963191
Fun fact: Shining already came up with a cruel and unusual punishment
9962023
I guess it's not about the bat ponies, it's about mangoes. He hates the taste.
9964966
That makes more sense.
I'm also wondering exactly what got me so many dislikes. Like was it the One Punch Man thing, the faggot thing, or the racist thing?
9964987
Maybe a bit of all, who knows.
9962023
I dunno, given Shining's history he'd probably be fine with Flurry spending a night in jail for her actions. Flash on the other hand...
9965329
...I mean...I doubt he wouldn't fire her...she did tase her after all.
9965500
No I mean Flash is likely to get fired over this, not Babs. He lost Flurry, got tasered by the cops because he didn't bring any method of identifying himself as a Royal Guard, and then let Flurry take part in morally dubious if not outright illegal activities, during which she exposed herself as a princess and got arrested.
The PR backlash alone would probably be enough to get him canned.
On another note, given Sombra's hard on for it, you'd think the Crystal Empire guards would be better hardened agains mind control.
First rule of childhood
Whatever happens, it's worse when your parents fins out
It's possible but the clean up would be impossible.
Where does that even come from.
10365172
Fanart, I guess. The "kirin beer is pee" tag is on derpibooru for a reason.