• Published 10th May 2019
  • 2,327 Views, 65 Comments

Is a Shark Mare's Bark Worse Than Her Bite? - Robipony

You have come to Haywaiian to make some research for your next book. It is here in this island paradise that you meet the diamond dog, Holly and a shark pony named Jagged Nibble. Enjoy your stay.

  • ...

Day 3 - Ho`okipa

When you woke, a massive headache ripped through your skull and the music coming over the radio wasn't helping either. Pulling yourself out of bed, you walked over to the radio where a gecko sat waiting.

"How did you get in here?"

The gecko merely tilted its head as if to remind you that you were talking to a cold blooded reptile. That no matter how much you asked, all it could do was stare at you.

After deciding to ignore the creature, you turned the radio off and went to the bathroom to take a shower.

"Well, that was probably a bad idea, drinking all that alcohol. I'm not even sure it was worth it."

You were feeling very fortunate that you'd managed to not throw up; though it was very likely that you'd need to drink a few cups of coffee. Some sunglasses wouldn't hurt either.

Leaving the bathroom you were greeted by the gecko, sitting on the floor looking up at you.

"Hey, don't you judge me!"

There you were, talking to the gecko again.

At the sound of somepony knocking on your door, the gecko scurried off. After a quick moment of making sure you were presentable, you opened the door. On the other side was Holly, who after looking you over, gave you a worried look.

"Are you okay?" Holly asked.

"I could really use a cup of coffee."

Holly sniffed the air, her nose turning upwards at some foul scent.

"I can tell," Holly said, "I know a place."

You followed Holly out of the hotel and into town, until you across a coffee shop by the name of the Blue Brew Bar. After each of you purchased a cup of black coffee, you and Holly sat down at a table. As the coffee flowed down your throat, you could feel your head start to feel better. The dark liquid helping to wash your brain of the poison you had ingested last night.

"You went out drinking last night."

"Yes," you answered, "and I already know it was a bad idea."

Holly let out a deep sigh, "Please tell me you didn't make a big scene."

Putting a hoof to your chin, you tried to recall any memories from the night before, that might have indicated that you did something horrible. While they were filled with a few regrettable moments, you could recall anything that would come back to haunt you.

"Not that I can remember." You answered.

"Well, that is good. It would be very problematic if you earned the reputation of a growler. It would make a few of the things I wanted to give you a tour of, very tricky."

"Yeah, all I did was have a few drinks with Jag. I think we may have danced at one point but that is all I can say for sure."

Immediately, at the mention of Jagged Nibble's nickname, Holly face became downtrodden.

"Oh, I see."

Perhaps it might be wise to change the subject. At least for now.

"So you said there were a few things you wanted to show me?"

Holly took a sip of her coffee, "Well, would you like to see more of our culture up close?"

"Sure. What did you have in mind?"

"My family is having a gathering today," Holly answered, "we'll be getting together to have a luau. There will be some great food along with some dancing. There will be a few other families there as well. It will be great."

"That sounds like fun," you agree, "sure, I would love to go."

Holly's house rested on a hill overlooking the sea. The structure was two stories tall, finely crafted with wooden planks and some concrete pillars.

As you drew near to the house you noticed three young diamond dogs playing outside. Seeing Holly approach the children smiled and waved.

"Hey sis." One of the young pups with a blue collar said.

"Hello Gib," Holly said, petting the top of her brother's head, "keeping your siblings safe right?"


Seeing you, Gib's other two siblings rushed over to their big brother, using him as a shield as they peaked around to look at you, a combination of caution and curiosity filling their expressions.

"Who is that?"

"This is my friend," Holly explained, "I thought he would like to see and learn more of our culture."

"So he's not a growler?"

"No, of course not." Holly gave a slight chuckle.

You gave the children a slight wave and with some reassurance from their older sister, the pup's expressions softened.

"Allow me to introduce you to my brother and sisters," Holly said with a smile, "this is Gib, Jill, and Shana."

As she introduced her siblings, Holly pointed from one to the other. Gib was the older male pup with the blue collar you had seen earlier with dark gray fur and blue eyes. Jill was a younger pup with blonde fur and violet eyes. Shana was the smallest with gray fur similar to that of her older brother and violet eyes. Neither one of the sisters had collars. Come to think of it, even Jag had a collar.

"Why don't you go on ahead and let Mom know we will be having a guest." Holly suggested.

You watched as the three pups ran to the house, their tails wagging as they went.

"You have a nice family." You said. Holly smiled at the complement.

"Thank you."

"I was wondering," you began to inquire, "I've seen you and most of the other natives around town with collars. Yet two of your siblings appear to be lacking any. Why is that?"

"Here on the islands, collars are a sign of adulthood or maturity," Holly explained, "the reason neither Jill nor Shana have collars, is because they aren't old enough to have one yet."

"So Gib is an adult?"

"A very young one, but yes."

"I see," you pondered, "are these collars given exclusively to the natives?"

Holly began to walk toward the house and you followed.

"Not necessarily," Holly answered, "sometimes if a pony comes and visits, they might be deemed worthy of a collar if they prove themselves."

Walking up to the house, Holly opened the door and motioned for you to step inside. Upon entering the building you realized that the three siblings you had seen outside were only a small fraction of the children inside the house.

At first most of these pups seemed to look at you with cautious expressions until Holly started introducing you to them. While you were certain that you would forget most of their names you put forth the effort to try to remember them.

Gradually you and Holly waded your way to the mother of the house: a stout, female diamond dog with brown fur like her eldest daughter. She was busy soothing a crying pup in her arms, while also trying to guide another pup as they learned to walk on their hind legs. Seeing Holly, the diamond dog smiled.

"Holly, it is so good to see you."

"Hey mom." Holly said, hugging her mother.

As the two exchanged hugs, Holly's mom noticed you.

"Is this one of your friends?"

"Yes," Holly answered, "I brought him here because he wanted to learn more about Haywaiian culture."

With a wide smile, Holly's mother walked over to you.

"Hello, I'm Kalna, Holly's mother, Kalna said, "will you be staying long here on the islands?"

"Just for a couple more days," you answered, "I am here doing some research for a book I am writing. I wanted to represent Haywaiian culture as accurately as possible."

"Well, in that case, you should have some Poi," Kalna offered, "I'll just need to fetch another bowl."

"I don't want to be a bother."

"No, I insist," Kalna urged, "please have a seat."

Before you knew it you were sitting at the table with Holly on your right and Gib on the left.

"So what is Poi?" You asked.

"Poi is produced from mashing the root of the Taro plant," Holly explained, "water is gradually added making it have consistency similar to the dish you call pudding on the mainland."

"I see."

You had to admit that it sounded kind of tasty.

"Some of our fellow islanders have religious beliefs pertaining to the dish," Holly continued, "it is believed that the first diamond dog was fashioned by the spirit, Howloa from a Tora root and that Howloa is always present at the unveiling of a batch of Poi."

Wooden bowls were set out in front of those sitting at the table. Once everyone had a bowl, Kalna began pouring the Poi into the containers. Like Holly said, the Poi resembled pudding with a grayish pink color.

Looking around you watched as the others are the table proceeded to scoop the food out of their bowls to eat. Seeing your confusion, Holly began to explain, "It is customary to eat Poi with one's paws."

Giving her a nod, you decided to follow the others example and scooped some Poi out of your bowl with a hoof. It was a difficult feat but you managed to have a decent amount of the Poi on your hoof.

With the morsel of Poi on your hoof, you placed the pudding like substance into your mouth. It was kind of sour.

"What do you think?" Kalna asked.

Not wanting to insult Holly's mother, you did your best to prevent your face from scrunching up.

"It's really nice." You answered.

Smiling, Kalna walked around the table to check on the other children at the table. Holly leaned in closely to you.

"You found it a little sour, didn't you?"

"Yeah, a little."

"Do you actually like it?"

You considered the thought.

"I think after a while I could grow used to it." You answered.

"It isn't always sour," Holly explained, "the fresher the Poi is the sweeter it will be. However, some diamond dogs like most of my family like it a little sour."

"Which do you prefer?"

"I like it a bit sweeter," Holly answered, "however I am content with whatever my family likes."

Gib leaned in, looking past you toward Holly.

"Hey sis," Gib spoke up, "a few of us are going to play some Ultra-Fetch before the luau. Do you want to come?"

"I'm not sure," Holly said, "I don't want to impose upon my guest."

"I don't mind," you answered, "it might be kind of fun."

Gib gave you a curious look, "Do you want to play?"

"If you're alright with that," you replied, "I haven't played this sport before, but Holly has told me about it, and I wouldn't mind giving it a try."

"Then it's settled!" Gib smiled.

"We should stop here and grab some supplies." Gib suggested, as the group stood in front of the open air market.

The group consisted of Holly, Gib, one of their siblings, one of Gib's friends and you.

"This is our little brother, Jake." Gib introduced.

"I'm not little!" Jake growled.

Jake was a young pup, maybe a few years younger than Gib, and while he lacked a collar, the young diamond dog wore a red scarf around his neck proudly.

"And this is my friend, Drew."

"Sup!" Drew raised a paw in greeting.

Drew appeared to be about Gib's age wearing a green collar with a green and white cap, resting backwards on the top of his head.

"Okay, we probably have ten minutes to spare," Holly said, "just meet back up here at the entrance."

Receiving permission, the other members of the the group rushed off leaving you and Holly still standing there.

"Well, let's go!" Holly smiled before walking into the market.

Stepping through the entrance, you saw numerous stands, covered with various items. Wooden sculptures, trinkets from the sea, bowls of colorful fruit and other items. As you walked along one of the booths caught your eye.

A sign on the top of the booths, noted the place as, The Explorer's Way. The items on the booths consisted of water canteens, backpacks, flashlights and maps. Behind the counter stood a diamond dog wearing an Explorer's cap, but what had grabbed your attention was the green gecko resting on his shoulder. It was identical to the gecko you had seen hanging around your hotel room.

"Hello there," the sales dog said, "my name is Roger and welcome to my stand. Does anything here interest you?"

"Well, I saw that gecko there," you replied, "and I was wondering what you could tell me about it?"

"This little guy's name is Herbert. There are many geckos like him here on the islands, but he is my friend."

"I just have been noticing one hanging around my hotel room a lot."

"Yeah, they like to do that. The building's provide them sanctuary and in return they eat the bugs. There is also a little trick Herbert can do. If you buy something I'll show you."


Giving the stall a quick look, you noticed a map of the Haywaiian Isles that cost only a few bits.

"I think I'll buy that map."


After the map was bagged and bits were exchanged, Roger pulled Herbert off his shoulders and set him down on the booth.

"Now put your hooves on the stall." Roger instructed.

You complied, setting both of your front hooves on the wooden surface. From behind the table, Roger pulled out a bottle of honey and poured a drop onto your left hoof. After putting the honey away, Roger took Herbert and placed him on your right forehoof, the gecko stood completely still.

"Now watch this."

Roger whistled and immediately Herbert scurried up your right foreleg, across the back of your shoulders, down the other leg and proceeded to lick the honey from your left hoof.

After that impressive display, you went looking for your new friends. You found Gib and Jake standing in front of a booth with a wizened old diamond dog with an eye patch.

"It's gonna cost ya two hundred bits." The salesdog said.

"What! No way!" Jake protested, scrunching his nose.

Stepping closer you discovered that the item being bartered over was a silver sphere with a couple odd looking gems sticking out of it.

"Why not?" The salesdog asked, "This is an object I found, in an alien spacecraft, sunken in the deep sea!"

Gib shook his head.

"More likely it's a fancy bobble that fell off a growler's boat." Gib said.

"Nah! It's real I swear!" The salesdog growled, "And it's worth every bit I'm asking!"

"All the same we don't have that kind of money," Gib said, "come on Jake, let's go! We can buy you another toy at a different vendor."

Jake frowned.


Seeing Jake's sullen appearance, you couldn't help but feel bad for him. However, even if you had the bits to pay for it, you knew you would regret purchasing it.

You followed Gib and Jake to another vendor where they were able to purchase a toy zeppelin for only a few bits.

Taking your new purchases, the three of you went back to the entrance where Holly and Drew were waiting.

"I got us a six pack of Frizzle Cola!" Gib grinned.

"You know mom doesn't like you drinking carbonated beverages." Holly stated.

"Are you going to tell her?"

"Nah," Holly chuckled, "is everyone ready to go?"

It wasn't a long trip from the open air market to the Ultra-Fetch course. As you entered the park, Gib tried to explain a couple things to you.

"Now since you don't have paws we are going to allow you to use your horn," Gib explained, "however there are a few rules you need to follow to ensure a fair game."

"Alright, I'm listening." You answered.

"First off, if you are pitching you can't teleport the ball. As cool as that would be, it isn't fun if the fetcher can't find the ball."

"That makes sense."

"Second, if your fetching the ball you can only use your magic within the range of one of your legs," Gib continued, "after all, the rest of us can only pick up and hold the ball within arms length."

You nodded. The conditions made sense and for the most part you had a clear understanding of the rules.

"I think I have a handle of what's going on."

"Then let's do this!"

The group split into two teams with Holly and Jake on one team, you and Gib on the second and Drew serving as a referee. The first match had you and Jake fetching, while Gib and Holly pitched.

Due to his small size, Jake was able to fetch the ball and after slaloming through three flags, managed to score thirteen points with a minute to spare. You on the other hoof, found the ball, before accidentally hitting yourself in the face with it as you tried to slalom your way back. it was ultimately agreed upon that your team had earned eight points from the venture.

Then the roles switched. Now it was your turn to throw and Gib's turn to fetch.

"Now remember you want to throw it far enough that I can come back and weave through all the flags," Gib said, "however you don't want to throw it too far."

Back when you were a colt and learning to use your magic, you learned very quickly how to throw things. However it took you a little longer to develop the necessary skill to gradually move and hold objects. Once you learned how to perform the task, your parents refused to allow you to throw any more stuff.

Now the challenge would be to not only be able to throw the ball, but to have it land not to far out of range. You took a deep breath as you held the Ultra-Fetch ball with your magic.

Opening your eyes, you examined the field, there were a total of five flags on this course and the other team had managed to slalom through three of them in the previous round. If you could manage to throw the ball far enough and Gib it as able to pass all five flags in a timely manner, you might be able to catch up.

"Alright, here goes!"

Taking one final breath, you pulled the sphere back with your magic. On the exhale you pushed forward and released. The ball hurled through the air, to land right next to the Fourth flag.

As soon as the ball hit the ground, Gib was off. While he was good at pitching it became very clear that this was what Gib loved most about the game as he sped toward the sphere. Once the ball was in his paws, Gib ran back, weaving between the flags.

Jake on the other hoof, didn't manage to throw the ball very far. With his little arms he was barely able to make it land halfway to the first flag. Despite this, Holly giggled and returned the ball.

Much of the event went on like that, with you excelling well at pitching the ball, while coughing your lungs out after fetching it. Still everyone had fun and you enjoyed the time you spent with the group.

During one of the times, you were throwing the ball, you looked up and noticed a large mountain in the distance. Holly observed your gaze and walked over.

"That is Kalaugie," Holly explained, "the sleeping throne. It is a dead volcano said to once have served as the throne of the goddess, Pelesh. Some say that one day it will awaken again."

"Isn't that frightening," you asked, "having a volcano in your backyard?"

"Maybe a little," Holly answered, "it is believed that while Kanene, the god of the sun and procreation created our kind, it was Pelesh who created the Haywaiian islands for us to live on, and continues to do so to this day. So long as one does not disgrace her sacred lands, no I'll will shall befall us."

"Sacred lands?"

"It refers to the lava flows," Holly explained, "the land blackened by Pelesh's lava is sacred to her. As a result it is wise to treat those lands with respect."

As superstitious as it sounded, you didn't want to get into an argument. After all a long time ago, most considered Nightmare Moon's return to be a myth and that turned out to be true. So who was to say that Pelesh couldn't be as well.

"Are there any rules I should know about in regards to Pelesh's sacred realm?" You asked.

"Just don't step into it without praying to her and don't take any lava rocks away from the islands without her permission," Holly answered, "doing so can bring bad luck."

Well, considering how your luck could be at times, you would prefer not to invoke any more.

The game went on for a few more rounds Holly and Jake scoring a total of sixty points, while Gib and you scored a total of sixty one. While Jake wanted to go for another round, Holly brought the game to a halt.

"We should probably start heading back." Holly said.

"Do we have to?" Jake whined.

"If we don't we will be late for the luau." Gib explained to his younger sibling.

With that said, you and the group began to make your way back to Holly's home.

The luau was a glorious event, much like Holly had promised. The sound of drums, flutes and ukulele filled the air as ponies and diamond dogs went about eating the food. At one point they had served some roasted pork, which as expected by your host didn't really fit your diet too well, so instead they gave you and the other pony guests some Poi, vegetables and some salmon for the unicorns that were present.

As the sun went down, the entertainment became more vibrant as the fire dancers came out. Some belched forth fire like dragons while others carried torches, which they would spin and juggle.

Rings of fire were burned into your vision as many of the dancers twirled their flaming torches, sometimes even with only one paw. The faster the torches moved, the faster the beat of the drums. It was a jaw dropping experience.

"Are you enjoying the show?" Gib asked.

You nodded, "It's quite breathtaking."

Looking around, it became very apparent to you that while you had been watching the festivities, Holly had disappeared.

"Where did Holly go?" You asked.

"She's getting ready to dance!" Jake answered.

Almost as if it was on queue, a group of dancers came out before the crowd. While most of them were diamond dogs a few of the dancers were ponies as well. They wore skirts made of long green leaves, necklaces of flowers, anklets and bracelets made from leaves, along with crowns of flowers. Standing among the group was Holly.

The pace of the music slowed to a gentle pace and the hula dancers proceeded to move to the rhythm. They would sway their hips to the beat, occasionally bending their knees to emphasize their hip movements. While the diamond dogs would stretch out their paws forming wave like motions, some of the ponies managed to perform a similar technique while standing on the hind legs. For the ponies it was an impressive feat, showing that they had trained their leg muscles to carry their weight while performing the difficult task.

It was a joyous spectacle and you were glad that you had been invited to watch. All the dancers looked great and there were even a few of the dancing mares that you thought looked pretty cute.

As the dance went on, occasionally one of the dancers would pull someone from the crowd to dance along. You found it to be humorous with the first few ponies you saw this happened to. That was until you saw Holly step into the crowd, reaching her paw out to you.

"Go on!" Jake said.

"I don't think that's a good idea." You said, trying to back peddle out of it.

"Come on! Do it!" Gib encouraged. The pup repeated the encouragement and soon a majority of the crowd was cheering you on. All the while, Holly continued to smile with her paw outstretched.

Seeing that there was no way out of this, you swallowed your pride and took Holly's paw.

"Don't worry," Holly whispered, "just follow my lead as best you can."

With some difficulty you managed to lift your front half upwards, trying to emulate the movement the other pony dancers performed. The crowd laughed at your attempts. You were certain that if there was a mirror in front of you, it would show you your face, bright red with embarrassment.

"You don't need to work so hard," Holly whispered, "just try to move your hips and knees to the music."

Her advice kind of reminded you of your drunken dancing with Jag the night before. Taking her suggestions you attempted to move your hips and bend your knees. Once you grew accustomed to the rhythm, you found that you were really having fun. It was almost saddening when Holly motioned that it was time for you to return to your seat.

"Oh, you definitely have a tourist's legs," Gib teased.

After a few more songs, the dancing ended as the luau gradually came to an end. While Gib started corralling his younger siblings for bed, Holly walked over to you, her hula outfit still on. Holly looked stunning in the dance uniform here under the light of Luna's moon, and for a moment you could understand why a pony might fall in love with such a creature.

"Hey, would you like to go for a walk?" Holly asked, pointing toward the beach, "Walk off some of the food you ate."

"Uh, yeah... That would be great."

Walking along the beach, you could feel the sand crunching underneath your hooves and Holly's paws. Holly would giggle as the waves splashed across the beach, making contact with her feet.

"You looked lovely this evening," you said, breaking the silence.

"Thank you," Holly giggled, "you did a pretty good job, yourself."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that."

"No, really," Holly answered, "for a tourist that was pulled out of a crowd, you danced your first hula pretty well. Pelesh would be pleased."

"So Pelesh likes dancing then?"

"Yes, in fact it is said that the hula was created when Pelesh begged one of the other gods to dance for her. Her sister, Hi`iakazawakh, would be the first to perform the hula."

"Family is important in Haywaiian culture isn't it."

"It certainly is."

As Holly and you walked along the beach, you remembered what Jag had said about last luau they had shared.

'Apparently, during a luau, I may have had too much to drink and I may have in a delirious state... Hit on her sirefriend.'

"Holly, may I ask you something?"

"Sure, what is it?"

You swallowed hard, hoping that your friendship with Holly wouldn't be fractured by your question.

"Why are you upset with Jag?"

Holly stopped walking, her gaze turned downward toward the sand.

"Was it that obvious?"

You nodded, "She thinks you hate her."

Holly's head shot up toward you, a shocked expression on her face, "What? She thinks that? I don't hate her..."

Once more Holly's head lowered.

"...I'm afraid of her."


Looking back up, Holly considered your inquiry. Then slowly she reached down and began to untie the wraps around her arms. As she did this, you realized that not once had you seen Holly without them. As the wrappings came off it became very clear why.

Holly flinched as the flesh underneath was revealed. Pink scars were positioned on her arms to reveal numerous jagged teeth marks.

"At the last luau we had been on," Holly began to explain, "Jag had had a lot to drink. A lot more than usual. We were walking along the beach, like you and I are now, when I voiced my concerns to her, however she wouldn't listen. At one point I had stepped on a sharp shell or rock, and started bleeding. It was then that she... Changed..."


"Yes!" Holly began to cry. "She wasn't herself anymore! She lunged at me and all I could do was ward her off with my arms! After punching her in the nose, I managed to run away! Then... The next day she acted like it never happened!"

Holly covered her eyes with her paws, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry," you apologized, "I had no idea."

Your heart felt heavy at the revelation. As you tried to comfort Holly, a thought occurred to you.

"So this had nothing to do with Jag hitting on your sirefriend."

"No," Holly sniffled, "why?"

"That's what Jag told me," you answered, "she thought you were mad at her because she had hit on Hammer."

"No. Hammer and I mutually broke up because he was moving to the mainland and we didn't think we could maintain a long distance relationship."

Your heart felt sick, having to listen to Holly sob. There was no words you could think of that could comfort her, all you could do was stand next to her and place a supporting hoof on her arm. Moments later you were shocked to find yourself trapped in the middle of a tight hug, wet tears dripping down your shoulder. While a part of you wanted to push free, you weren't sure how Holly might interpret your actions, so instead you tried your best to return the embrace.

"Will you be okay?" You asked.

"Yes," Holly sniffled, "thank you so much for listening."

"No, I'm sorry. I really shouldn't have pushed the issue."

Holly released the hug and began rubbing tears from her eyes with a paw.

"It's fine," Holly answered, "I've been holding onto that for a while now. Not even my family knows what happened."

Slowly, Holly rewrapped her arms and put on the best face she could.

"I think it's time we called it a night." Holly said.

With aching hearts you went back the way you came, to the site of the luau.

You felt exhausted as you stepped into your hotel room. The Ultra-Fetch game, the luau and your discussion with Holly had really worn you out. As you made your way to the bed, you saw your familiar friend, the gecko. He was sitting next to the shark plushie Jag had purchased for you, watching you from atop of the broken television.

For a brief moment, you ignored the intrusive gecko and walked over to the radio and turned it on. As the music played you went over and threw yourself onto the bed.

"That was Crystalline Sphinx and their new single, Unbroken," DJ Sharp's voice came over the radio, "before we start our next song, I was informed that there will be a storm tomorrow evening. So get home early or bring a raincoat."

You hadn't really anticipated any stormy weather when you had packed for this trip, so it would probably be wise to try to buy a coat tomorrow. While you were sure that Holly's family might just give you one, you didn't really want to impose.

"Next up, we have the hit classic, Endangered Zone," DJ Sharp announced as the music returned.

This further reminded you of the conundrum at hoof. There was DJ Sharp, whom you now knew was Jag who had apparently bitten Holly a few weeks ago. As a result, Holly had distanced herself. Meanwhile Jag seemed to have no knowledge of having bitten her friend and instead believed Holly was being bitter over another event entirely. And in the span of three days both of them had become your friends.

"What can I do?" You asked yourself out loud.

Looking up, you saw the gecko sitting there, observing you from beside his stuffed friend, their eyes blinking very slowly.

"So what do you think," you asked, "do you have any ideas on what I should do?"

The gecko gave you a blank stare, almost as if trying to remind you that it couldn't talk to you even if it wanted to. Even if it could, it wasn't like he could read your mind anyway. Of course, you hadn't expected the gecko to say anything, but there was nothing wrong with trying. After all, in a world where chimera, monstrous hybrids and shark ponies exist, you wouldn't be surprised if there was a mind reading gecko out there somewhere.

"If only I could get them to talk to one another in a civil manner."

Tired and uncertain how to proceed, you pulled yourself under the covers and went to bed. Perhaps in your slumber, Princess Luna would deliver to you the answers you were looking for.