City in a Bottle

by Cynewulf

II. The Long Halls of Solitude

Twilight Sparkle stood on the observation desk, staring out over her city.

It wasn’t really a city. Nor was it hers in the sense that she’d not built it. It wasn’t anyone’s. It was just… a place.

She liked that it was empty. She liked that the city had mysteries, but none of them were demanding anything at all from her. If she wanted to solve them, she could. If she didn’t want to, they lay dormant and waiting.

She shouldn’t complain. Not that she had! But she shouldn’t. Life had been hooved over on a silver platter and she was acutely aware of it. Family, friends, inherited wealth some day and a stipend from the rents on the lands she now technically owned by right of being a Princess. Oh, being a Princess. That should go first, probably.

But sometimes, Twilight wished she could. A thousand more petty assaults on her patience could she endure if she could have but a day of solitude and freedom. It wasn’t likely to happen out there.

But here? Here it could happen. In a world with only one pony, it was a lot harder to ask--

And then there were two ponies.

She flinched back, baffled. Who would even know--?

Oh. That was who. She let out a breath in sudden relief, but it was short lived. It was only Rarity. But it was never just “only Rarity”, was it?

It wasn’t as if she had been avoiding Rarity. It wasn’t that. She was fairly sure. If anyone’s presence was to be bearable, it would be that graceful unicorn. But she didn’t want to bear it. Not this one moment. Every other moment, yes and yes forever, just not this one moment.

But it wouldn’t do to whine about it. There were worse fates.

So, instead, she went out on the balcony and looked down for a moment. She felt the wind in her mane, and marveled how real it was. The city was ludicrous and impossible, a dream somewhere between nostalgia and melancholy. Somewhere for a pony feeling like she felt.

She’d meant for this place, this city and its commanding tower, to be an outpost to hide out in for a little while until the stormclouds in her heart had dissipated. But they hadn’t gone away, really. Being pensive and indecisive was certainly better than being worried and fretful, but it wasn’t as if she’d really solved anything by taking this sabbatical from reality.

She wasn’t sure why, but she started to speak over the rusty rail into the cold wind that smelled of the sea.

“You know, I used to think that being together would be like this. Just like the city in a glass, plucked right out of time. I used to think being together would be like finding a smooth stone in a river. You take it out, dry it off, put it on your desk. It’s nice, and it reminds you of a wonderful place. But the river can no longer erode it. Does that make sense?

“I was so sure that was how it was supposed to work. It was supposed to be this… this collage of snapshots, all of them wildly happy or softly content, and then you would just freeze all of that. That was a relationship. That was love.”

She slumped a bit and sat down.

“I’m not sure I like being wrong. Sometimes I do,” she told the air. “When it comes to science, when it comes to magic… sometimes being wrong can be fun. It means I learn something new, and now I can be even more sure than I was. But being wrong about this doesn’t feel like that. I don’t lose important things because I was going about one of Starswirl’s variations in an unorthodox manner. I don’t end up a-alone.”

She paused, and cleared her throat.

“Wow. Okay. That was… uh, unexpected.

“You know… one of the weirdest days of my life was the day after Spike moved out? I had never been on my own. Spike lived with me in the tower, and before that I had lived in dorms or with my family. I just had never been really, truly, on my own. You girls think of my old life as lonely, but it always had other ponies in the background of it.”

Where was Rarity, she wondered. Was she down there, on the ruined highways? Had she wandered into one of the overgrown malls or stood transfixed by the old movie advertisements? She could see her love and hear her soft tapping hoofs against the tile as she inspected the remains of an old boutique on one of the city’s many high streets in what she guessed had been some sort of shopping district.

Did she walk by the shining sea, and smell the salt and feel the wind, like Twilight did?

All of a sudden, she found she was desperate to know.

“I guess I was afraid,” she said at last. “You know. Of being officially, technically, exactly alone. I wasn’t prepared. I couldn’t make contingencies for a state of being I knew nothing about. Without data, you can’t draw conclusions. No bricks without straw,” she added with a smirk. It felt a bit out of place, a bit weak. She dropped it. “I planned something for that day so it wouldn’t be so empty. I was going to rework how I organized the shelves, so I could learn to do it without Spike. The palace library was even smaller then, though to you it probably has always seemed massive. I had planned on it taking me four or five hours, with lunch splitting the work evenly in two. It was just long enough to tire me out.

“Except it wasn’t. I spent all day in there. I forgot to meet everyone for lunch and showed up late and frazzled. I didn’t get take out at my favorite place like I had planned to, and I sent the staff home early. I just wandered. I do that, sometimes. I wander. Usually I do it up here--” she tapped her head. “But sometimes… Well. I found this gem for a reason.” She chuckled.

“But I never know where I’m going.”

Comments

[Hermann Goring]

Good story so far, keep it up!

[Eclipse Moonshine]

Excellent!!

[FanOfMostEverything]

This certainly looks like it's going to be an interesting ride. Looking forward to seeing where it goes.

[hawthornbunny]

This isn't second-person, or does that come later? (I usually skip 2nd person fics, but the premise of this intrigued me and it's quite good so far )

[Cynewulf]

8914972
The entire first chapter is a second person address except for a handful of rarity moving about.

[hawthornbunny]

8915008
Hmmm, I guess my definition of second person is too narrow :) I always assumed it meant the narrator giving events in second-person perspective.

[Yami Vizzini]

Well, Raritwi is always nice, and this setting is quite evocative. I think there may be layers I’m missing of what Twilight’s going through, but it’s a good hook.

[Fiddlebottoms]

Is this actually going to have an ending or is it going to leave me and the characters in a suspended limbo between time like that Applejack one with a similar theme you wrote? I guess I wil just have to suffer until I find out,

[Cynewulf]

8916242
Not sure if you meant it that way, but that's decidedly not the way to get someone to write something.

[Ice Star]

I have to say, in every installment that features Twilight in a relationship, she always expresses some curious ideas on what she thinks of love.