Twinkle/TOCP's Thirty Minute Ponies Stories

by Twinkletail

Prompt #60: Because Typicalmod Is Creatively Drained And Thinks Thinly-Veiled Parodies Are Funny

The Prompt: The last pony in Equestria.

Twist woke up with a start. It was 8:30 AM, and she was usually woken up by her parents at 8:00. Something was very odd.

“I wonder why my parenth didn’t wake me up?” Twist wondered out loud. “Maybe they wanted to teach me how to be rethponthible!” Twist frowned, worried that she had just failed her first grownup test. However, this was not enough to dissuade her completely. She put her glasses on and headed downstairs, ready to have herself some delicious peppermint pancakes. Her confusion only grew when there were no pancakes, nor parents, waiting for her.
“What’th the deal?” Twist asked nopony in particular. “Where are my parentth?” She thought for a few moments. “Maybe they’re out buying prethentth for me!” Twist smiled and headed to the kitchen to make her own breakfast. She didn’t know how to make pancakes, though, so she just had candy canes. She was good at making those, and they were practically all she ate when she was stuck making her own meals. She loved them, though, so eating them so often made her (As well as Dr. Colgate) very happy.

Upon finishing her breakfast, Twist wondered why her parents still weren’t home. It wasn’t like them to leave her home alone for this long. Twist walked outside to see if they were maybe relaxing outside or something. She was further thrown off by the fact that the entire town seemed to be vacant.

“What’th going on here?” Twist wondered. She started knocking on the doors of random houses, but nopony answered.

“…I mutht be the latht pony in Equethtria!” Twist exclaimed, astonished. “I can do whatever I want!”

Twist spent the next eight hours getting the house ready. For years, she had wanted to replace all of the furniture in her house with candy cane furniture, but she never had the time to do so, and also it would have likely gotten her parents quite angry. Now, though? Nothing would get in her way. Twist looked around the house proudly once she was done. No furniture remained in the house, save for whatever it was that she used to make candy canes.

“Now, to get thtarted on the motht thuper-thpectacular thpecial houthe ever!” Twist said happily. She reached over to start the candy cane machine, but tripped. She grabbed onto the machine to steady herself, accidentaly pulling the self-destruct lever in the process. Twist stared in horror as the candy cane machine fell apart, and the individual pieces burst into flame.

“No…no…” Twist said, in utter shock. “That’th not fair…that’th not fair at all. There wath time now…there wath all the time I needed! That’th not fair!!” Twist burst into tears, surrounded by the flaming wreckage of the machine, a burning reminder of all the candy canes she could never eat.

Comments

[Makokam]

I gotta admit, I don't get this. I even read it to a friend to see if he got it, but he can't remember what it's a paradoy of, only that he "liked the Family Guy parody better."
Soooo.....
Yeah.

[Focusphobia]

1014675
It was a Twilight Zone episode about a bank clerk (male) only wanted to read. But his work, his eyes (needed glasses to see), his wife and the universe in general wouldn't let him. One day, he goes into the bank's vault, when it suddenly closes. And as the door locks, evey nuke in the world goes boom. He is the only surviver on the planet, then he realizes something. He can read withiout anyone saying otherwise. Not his wife, not starvation, and especially not radiation. So as he starts reading, he has to do... something, when suddenly, he trips. His glasses break as they hit the ground. And what he says was more or less like what was written in this chapter.
Actually, Twilight Sparkle would be a better victim for this. Twilight, books, Stephenie May- I'm done.