Chapter Eleven - Coping
It is the next night, and Cherry has indeed brought more of her extended collection. Mare scans the various first issues, to try sorting out the ones she is interested in, while Cherry busies herself with dusting the tower room.
“So this guy has about five girls all vying for his affection, and he is totally oblivious to all of them?” Mare asks.
“Yeah, I kinda stopped reading that one after a while, I mean it was kinda funny for a bit…” Cherry said.
Mare finishes the thought. “But you got frustrated that the romance wasn’t going anywhere?” she says, putting down the book to pick up another one.
“Pretty much, have you read it before?” Cherry asks.
“Too many times to count,” Mare says before burying her nose in another one.
Internally, Cherry is cheering. After maybe a week of knowing her, she has finally found some common ground. Sure, it’s only over a shared preference of Neighponese reading material, but it’s a start. If she is honest with herself, she has been doubting herself since day one of this job as caretaker for an immortal child, but she is starting to feel that maybe she might be cut out for this after all.
“Excuse us, Miss Cherry.” She turns around to see Celestia and Luna standing in the door. “We missed you at supper.”
And Cherry’s confidence takes a severe dive, as does her head as she makes a deep bow. “I’MSOSORRY!- I mean I got distracted!- I was- I mean-”
“It's alright, Cherry. No harm done,” Celestia says calmly, “but we are curious. So far you have been quite punctual, what happened?”
Cherry shuffles her hooves apologetically. “I guess I was so excited to show Mare my collection that I forgot about supper.”
“Your collection?” Celestia asks.
It is then that they notice Mare sitting in one of the big armchairs with a veritable mountain of books on the coffee table, and her nose buried firmly in one. She doesn’t seem to have acknowledged that the princesses have entered the room.
“Hello Mare, I suppose you forgot too,” Celestia says, approaching her, but raising her eyebrow when Mare didn’t respond. “Mare?”
“I never knew you were a collector of literature,” says Luna, addressing Cherry.
“Yeah, heh heh. Literature,” Cherry says, rubbing the back of her neck.
At that moment Mare holds the manga out at arm’s length and tilts her head to one side, examining the page critically. “I get that this character is supposed to be provocative, but I don’t get ponies, is it how she poses or the way she dresses that is supposed to excite horny teenagers?” She looks up to see a shocked Celestia and Luna, while Cherry was seriously considering stabbing herself with a feather duster out of embarrassment. “Oh, hey Celestia, Luna, when did you get here?”
“I remember these,” Celestia says, looking over one of the ‘books’. Mare has moved to the bed, and Cherry is hyperventilating in a corner (how she found a corner in a round tower is anyone's guess.) The cover shows some giant robots fighting. “It came with the discovery of Neighpon a decade or so ago, their culture and technology became very vogue for a little while, and while it was mostly fine art and a few of those ‘computers’, some less sophisticated aspects came across too, like those game cabinets, some pop music, and these ‘manga’, as I believe they are called. While the high class Neighponese craze died down pretty fast as the Canterlot trend engine moved on, these smaller facets endured, I believe there is still a small subculture among teens and young adults around these books, and the game cabinets have been a big hit with foals ever since they were introduced.”
“I am not surprised,” says Luna, skimming through one. “Who knew that automatons had become this advanced in my absence, these Neighponese ‘mechs’ are truly awe inspiring.”
“Luna, those don’t actually exi…”
“Wait. Did someone say game cabinets, as in arcade machines!?” Mare exclaims, sitting up and completely nullifying Celestia's chance to clear up a misconception.
“Err yes, I believe there is an arcade somewhere in Canterlot in fact, though I have never…”
Mare materialises in front of her. “Where is it? Can I go? I’ll do chores for small change!” she pleads, her eyes sparkling.
Celestia is shocked at this level of enthusiasm, but while she does want to indulge Mare…
Mare seems to remember too, as her eyes fall into apathy. “Oh right, forgot, I can’t leave the castle.”
“Mare…” Celestia says.
“No, I get it,” Mare says, walking back to her bed. “Out there is too dangerous, I’m not so stupid as to risk meeting…” she stops and shudders, “that again.” She flops onto her bed and picks up the manga again. “Don’t worry, I’ll just stay here, where it's safe.”
Celestia detects a hint of anger in Mare’s voice, but it doesn’t seem directed at her. The Dark maybe?
“Now Mare, if you want to, I’m sure we can find a way…” Celestia tries.
“No thanks!” Mare snaps. “Don’t worry, I’m already used to it, The world doesn’t want me to be happy, I get that. I’m sure something equally terrible will happen if I start to have fun!”
“Now, Mare,” Celestia says, getting slightly worried. “I know it hasn’t been easy for you, but I’m not sure you need to go that far.”
“Don’t I? My life might as well be a joke!” Mare says, suddenly straightening up, angry tears in her eyes. “Just one big cruel joke! Even before Equestria, ever since… Since.” She slumps and starts sniffing, rubbing her eyes.
Celestia and Luna share a look and move to sit by Mare on the bed, Celestia on her left, Luna to her right. Both drape a comforting wing over her.
Cherry hovers awkwardly, before deciding that the only thing she can add to this situation is a hot cocoa, and leaves.
Mare has recovered somewhat, and is sipping from her cocoa, flanked on either side by the princesses.
Celestia wants to say something, but she has a feeling that Mare has more that she wants to get off her chest, so the princess keeps silent.
Mare, for her part, is staring blankly into her mug, as if hoping it would give her the answers. Eventually she speaks.
“I… I have been remembering some things recently, old things.... I remember my first home,” she says softly.
Both Celestia and Luna couldn’t help but lean further in, this is new to both of them, even to Celestia. Before the reaping, Mare never spoke about her past more than was necessary.
“It was a large house, I shared it with seven other girls, all foster kids like me. They were older than me, but that never seemed to matter, we were all each other had. And then there was Miss Evans, she ran the place…” Mare gave a sniffle, “She was supportive, comforted me when I was sad, told bedtime stories, she was never angry, and always listened, she was like a mother to me… to all of us really. She even taught me how to sew, She provided us food to eat, a roof over our heads. She was the kindest, nicest old lady I have ever known.”
“Sounds like she is a wonderful person,” Celestia says delicately.
“Was,” Mare says softly. “She passed away when I was six.”
“What happened?” Luna asks.
“She was just old, as far as I know,” says Mare, a stray tear running down her cheek. “One night she went to bed and never got up again. No warning, just there one day and gone the next.”
Both Celestia and Luna tighten their grip on Mare.
“I was too young to understand then, all I knew was that she had gone to sleep, and would never get up.” She takes a sip of her drink to distract her from the memories. “The others tried to comfort me, but I simply couldn’t get it, why wouldn’t she get up? Why had she left me alone? Why had she abandoned me? I was stupid back then.”
Celestia thinks about interjecting at the random self loathing, but it seems Mare isn’t finished.
“After that the small orphanage was shut down, there was no-one there to run it after all, and we were moved to the large one across town. It wasn’t a bad place, I guess, but it wasn’t home. That's about as much as I have remembered.”
There is silence after Mare finishes telling her story, only filled with Mare’s sniffling.
Mare finishes her drink. “So you see, this is just another misery filled chapter in my life, I don’t think this will be the last either.”
Celestia tries to tighten her grip, but this time Mare vanishes and reappears behind them on the bed, leaning against the frame of a window, manga in hand. “So if you don’t mind, I’m just going to try and enjoy reading manga, before the universe finds a way of ruining that for me too.”
Celestia is at a loss, this is the deepest she has ever seen into Mare’s psyche, and yet she has no idea how to respond. She never knew Mare had been carrying this much emotional baggage, she doesn’t even know what she can even say that might cheer her up.
Luna looks like she has something on her mind, she is biting her lip. She takes a deep breath. “Mare… would you mind if I ask you something?”
Mare looks up from her book.
Luna looks nervous. “Well, the sky is very clear tonight, and was wondering that, if you might like to indulge in some stargazing with me, to perhaps take your mind off things... perhaps,” she says nervously, wondering if this is the right time to ask. “It's just, it's always made me feel better, and I thought I might be able to point out some of the less known constellations. Miss Smith did say you had an interest.”
For many moments, Mare simply blinks at Luna, not sure what kind of response she should give to that, but seeing Luna’s earnest expression, she eventually says, “I guess, this one wasn’t that good anyway.”
Luna’s expression lights up and she moves over next to Mare by the window. “We can start here. Join us if you like Cherry, I’ll begin by pointing out some of the better known constellations…”
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I hope Celestia finishes her explanation to Luna about mecha not existing. It would probably be embarassing if Luna put out a decree demanding the construction of mobile suits.
i just want to hug mare and tell her everything will be alright
8480905
You do?
Did I accidentally sneak in a shiptease?
8480987
you are the author so you tell me i am just reading my ship sense
8481003
looks like good sailing weather too
8481019
Well, I was planning a ship....
The Best of Friendships!
8481038
well weather the ship sails or sinks it will be my head cannon that cherry has a crush on mare
Welcome back story, you have been missed!!!
8480901
Sieg Equestria!
Every chapter just makes my frozen heart melt some more.
8480901
Uh, no. That would be too boring. I think that Celestia needs to start an R&D on mobile suits :).
8480901
Nah, I hope she doesn't. Because knowing the ponies, they would simply take Luna's decree at face value and actually build a mecha for her!
Perhaps Pinkie and Dr. Hooves could help!
mare would probably be pleasantly surprised if celestia bought a few arcade machines and gave mare her own arcade room.
8481003
Still unlikely to happen in this story though, but we'll see if you don't get lucky in the sequel.
8481041
8484552
Gee guys, thanks a lot, Now even I've started shipping it
8484585 I was just memeing
I don't really care if a ship happens or not. I just wanted to use the gif. 
8484585
i dropped tesubject for the most part just people keep repling to the comment
8531205
do you not get the joke?
8531947
nope
8532177
so its a women that's not married but has no virginity
When you need a corner to get some hyperventing on (or just to have a mild meltdown party with your besties "Me", "Myself", and "I" in attendance) and pronto, even the corner between the wall and the floor will do. I checked. It helps when you feel... sufficiently motivated.
More adventurous types are encouraged to try for the ceiling one as well - I'm told it lends itself splendidly to life crises.