The explosion of Chernobyl's fourth reactor in the Spring of 1986 shook Earth and its neighboring universe, Equestria to their cores. Celestia among several others lost a dear friend that day...or so they thought.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Another tip, try not to be so technical, unless the situation requires it. For example
Could be written with more... Emotional, yet equally descriptive words to make the story feel more... Live. Here would be what I would probably do.
It's good and all to try to sound fancy, but... It's also good for it to sound... Real. Not like a robot, or super nerd wrote it.
No offense to any robots, super nerds, and robot super nerds though.
Great job on the dialogue though. And I am sorry if I sound like I'm picking on you, or hate the story, because I can assure you- I'm not, and I don't.
I just fancy myself a critic. And what kind of critic doesn't criticize?
You are getting better though. One time you did do something like that, weather intentionally or not, would be when you called the ambulance a “death wagon”.
It's things like that which make stories feel more... Alive.
In other news, a cliffhanger-y ending! Yay... I guess... Now I will be
obsessing overWaiting for the next chapter.Then again, I guess that is the entire point of cliffhangers. To make you impatient, and anxious, as of what happens next.
Where the hell are all these dislikes coming from?...I'm trying to figure out where I went wrong...
8558668
While I can get that Big Mac might've felt that way for a while but bottled it up til he burst, but even then having him be really angry, and swearing, and insulting the farm (kinda), and calling himself a hick, just felt so...not Big Mac.
8557902
I don't think Celestia had much in the way of choices then to deal with Ukraine's puppet government, sense I don't think she could positioned the rift at her leisure and might as well develop good relations as best she could all the while learn more about those humans without falling pray to their manipulations. Still, it is to their testament that she and Radius manage to cultivate such a good relation with the communist government of the time to get a posting to in a nuclear reactor and know some of it's fundamental functions then they did incredibly well considering all the mistrust their was back then.
8557931
1986 to 2006 would be 20 years, friend 30 years later would be 2016 which is when this story is set. Prince was gone by then.
8565079
Fuck I'm stupid
8565707
No you're not, you are a human being who makes mistakes like the rest of us.