A Behemoth in Equestria (cancelled)

by Fanskapet

Chapter 5 Still sucks (now without macshy shipping)

"You didn`t answer mah question earlier about what to do with it, we can`t keep it here since we need to fix the roof and well got apples to buck."
The orange mare with a hat said, pointing a hoof towards the giant form of Vilefor on the floor.

"Not really helping my self esteem being called IT all the time."
He thought with a frown towards the two mares talking about him.

"Well you have to keep it until Princess Celestia can help with this problem."
The purple mare said taking a look towards the big hole in the roof.

"Mmbmh."
Vilefor grunted through his chained muzzle, trying to shift his position.

"Whoa Twilight are yA sure we shouldn`t get any more chains?"
The little dragon said as they watched the chains strain under the creatures strength.

"Whoa nelly!"
The orange mare said ducking as one of the chains holding his mid section broke and flew towards her.

"Watch out Spike!"
The purple pony apparently named Twilight shouted, as her horn lit up and made the little dragon light up in the same purple aura, pulling him towards her.

"Quick rope him Big Mac!"
The orange pony named Applejack shouted, as she begun swinging a lasso and aiming it towards Vilefors horns.

"Well this went straight to shit."
He thought as his horn got roped and begun getting pulled down towards the floor.

"Mgmmhm."
He mumbled through his chained muzzle, letting himself getting pulled down, mostly because of his back pain he got from the fall last night.

"Ah think we got him!"
Applejack said as she tied her rope to a large anvil nailed to the floor.

"Good work Applejack, you too Big Mac."
Twilight said stil holding Spike in her magic, forcing him behind her out of the creatures reach.

"Eeyup."
Big Mac said as he tied his rope to a wooden beam.

"Did not expect it to be that strong."
Twilight said as she let go of Spike, and walking over to Vilefors chained down form, looking him in the eyes before lowering her horn towards him.

"Wait is she gonna use magic on me now?"
He thought as he noticed the purple mares horn light up.

"Mrhgmbmmmhh!"
He shouted through his chained muzzle.

"Damn these ponies."
He thought as he heard the mare say
"Hold it still I will try and put it to sleep."

"Okay you heard her Big Mac, take the rope again and hold it down."
Applejack said as she took the other rope in her mouth.

"Okay I just hope this spell works on a creature this big, only tried it once on the Cake twins."
Twilight said, making the apple siblings give each other a scared look.

"Okay that`s it, I am not letting this horse use some experimental magic on me."
He thought as he turned and stretched his head just a few centimeters from the purple mares surprised face, snorting as hard he could through his nose, making the purple mare stumble backwards in surprise.

"Woah! you okay Twilight?"
Spike said as he ran up to her and helped her stand up.

"Y-yeah I`m okay."
She said as she got up and backed up a bit from the creature.

"Grrmrg"
Vilefor growled as he begun shaking his head back and forth, making the apple sibling stagger, forcing them to let go of the ropes around his horns.

"Whoa."
Applejack said as she stumbled forward before letting go of her rope.

"Don`t worry I got it!"
Twilight shouted as she took hold of the ropes with her magic, getting an angry glare from Vilefor, who just gave them another snort as he laid his head down on the floor again, as Twilight used her magic to wrap him into a cocoon made out of potato sacks and ropes.

"Fine just bring it to a close now damn ponies."
He thought as he was completely wrapped up in ropes, chains and potato sacks.

"Ah think that did it."
Applejack said with a sigh.

"Eeyup."
Big Mac said as he walked up to it and put another rope around its muzzle.

"Good work, not so tough now are you?"
Spike said walking up to its head to poke it on the side of the head, getting a low annoyed growl in return, that was cut short by a big red hoof over its muzzle.

"Ah said no."
Big Mac said as he stared at Vilefor.

"guess It`s logical breaking their barn and shit, but still why is he so mean?"
He thought as he laid there looking up at the big red horse infront of him.

"Uh Mac why don`t ya go get some apples or something for us?"
Applejack said as she walked up next to him.

"Ya sure sis? what if-."
He begun before she cut him off.

"It will be fine, look at it, it can`t move a millimetre and beside Twilight is here with me."
She continued making Big Mac let out a sigh.

"Okay then sis, just shout if it gets outta hoof."
He said as he walked out of the barn, giving the purple creature a final glare before walking out of the barn.

"So uhm what is up with Big Mac? never really seen him act like this before."
Twilight asked after a moment of silence.

"Guess this whole ordeal just brought out some bad memories."
Applejack said scratching her neck with a hoof.

"Bad memories?"
Twilight asked with a raised eyebrow.

"About our parents."
The country mare said.

"oh right, will he be okay?
Twilight asked.

"Well it will take time, but nothing we can`t handle."
Applejack said with a smile.

"Good to know, but if you need help i can let you borrow Spike a bit, right Spike?"
Twilight said looking over at her little assistant.

"Sure thing, as long as it gets me outside of the library and away from dusty old books."
Spike said getting a chuckle from Applejack and a small frown from Twilight.

"Really? did they just forget about me lying here?"
Vilefor thought after listening for what felt like hours.

*Groaaoorl*

"Did it just growl at us again?"
Twilight asked as they all three got startled by the sudden noise.

"Eh I think it was its stomach growling."
Spike said as he patted the creature on the muzzle.

"Yes good boy, that`s it."
He thought as he made his most pleading eyes towards the little dragon, while feeling a surprising urge to wag his big tail.

"Oh uhm we can`t let it starve can we?"
Twilight said looking over at Applejack.

"What? ya want me to feed it apples?"
Applejack said raising an eyebrow towards Twilight.

"We have to take the chains from its muzzle then."
Spike said tapping his claw on Vilefors muzzle.

"Well it is kinda secure by now, so we should be able to let his mouth be free so he can eat."
Twilight said stepping closer to the creature, making sure it was tied down and safe to approach, before levitating off the chains around its muzzle.

"Now be nice and we will feed you."
Twilight said as she put the chains down on the floor.

"As you wish."
He said with a smile at the mares surprised look.

yay new chapter sorry it took so long but i had written myself into a corner, had to rewrite this chapter like 3 times before i said fuck it it will be like this now.

and also noone has guessed where the name for him came from?

and how is my writing skills so far?
what needs to be improved and is it easy to follow what is happening?
and the whole macshy is skipped since noone really liked it and it just felt rushed in

Comments

[Muhanoid]

Big Mac and Fluttershy sitting on a tree...
Other than obvious few strings of next chapter, writing is good. Maybe there are sings of beginner, but I can't place my finger on it.
And as usual, you get one more "MOAR!" from me.

[Fanskapet]

836158
yay lol , and yes it is fluttermac since i love that couple, why i dont know maybe because 2 quiet ones fit well.

[Gypsy]

if the nam isn't FF don't even bother

[The Archimedes]

You need a editor.

[Brony of Truth]

1237797 You need 'AN' editor.

[Bronzer]

There are only two things I dislike (I can ignore the constant new paragraph for each instance of speech. By the way, you only need to do that when who is speaking changes): 1) Vilefor's extreme weakness/wimpiness; 2) the chapters are too short .