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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Bet he can't charm Zecora!
Besides typos, which are numerous, another big issue I'm having with this story is the lack of world building. What I mean is that there needs to be a reason for this to be happening to Pip. Are horny mares coming on to colts just part of the culture? Is Pip exuding some sort of natural pheromone? Further, there should be changes in behavior with Pip coming to terms with whatever is happening to him while the mares he's been with starting acting differently around him instead of everyone just dismissing what happened like consequence-free one night stands. Consequences, in some form, are necessary to help engross the reader.
7411959
My main issue with the story is that all descriptions of anything is just 'sexy.'
No actual description, just "She did a sexy pose," or "This feels sexy."
Because seriously, define your version of sexy. Is it that one fetish of yours is the only thing you consider sexy? Or maybe a simple wink is sexy to you. It can mean so many different things in this story.