THE GREATEST STORY OF ALL TIME!!!!

by The Dude

Why is a black man in my kitchen?

So spike was fucking chilling in the library smokin weed and watching interracial porno, starring Princess Celestia and Mike Tyson. As he was masturbating with butter he heard some fuckin knocks on the door. He got up from his couch made of Casey Anthony's skin and answered the door. He opened the door to find the ass tattoo crusaders, Scootaloo, Sweetie belle, and Applebloom (Who's anus and vagina smelled faintly of wolf.).

"What do you bitches want." He asked."We wanted to come over and be gay and get our cutie marks just like John Travolta!" Said Scootaloo. Even though they interrupted his massive masturbation session he did enjoy the company of hoes." Alright get yo asses in dis house." He stepped aside and let the ladies in.

Spike then sat his reptile ass back on the couch. The crusaders followed him but stopped to look at the television screen."Whats that?" Asked Sweetie Belle."Thats Mike tysons crotch." Responded Spike."Why is does this butter taste funny?" Asked Applebloom."Cuz I've been sticking my dick in it."

So Spike decided that porno wasn't the best thing to watch so he decided to watch "Ninja Samuel L Jackson vs Seth Rogen in Space Japan".

---

Fuck Steve Harvey.

Comments

[FireFlash13231]

dafuq did i just read...

[That_one_guy]

I feel like slamming my thick, meaty penis through your eye.

[floppy]

What kind of a troll fic is this.

[emberghost]

I have seen more dafuq before.

[Lupa]

Hahahaha this was hilarious!

Also, why the heck did I imagine Pinkie with a deep manly voice?

[The Dude]

Oh and if any one is wondering the title of the second chapter is an actual question. Theres a black man in my kitchen and he wont leave. Hes been making cheese sandwiches for the last 2 days. But he just wont leave.....

[StayOuttaMyShed]

So I guess it's safe to say the "After seeing a rule 34/63 picture of x I went to sleep and.." has became a thing now for descriptions.

Oh well, time to read.

[ArmyOfOne1112]

697686 I can never get used to dat profile pic. .MOV is epic.

[Reed Libro]

697713 how do you watch that with out feeling like your sick that

How i felt when i watched SHED.MOV well at lest some...

[Onevsamillion]

...this is amazing xD

[MasterCombine]

I don't even...

[Hungrybear]

697601
You would know.

[SlightlyGrape]

697741 .mov is actually pretty hilarious. Shed.mov was probably inspired by cupcakes. magic.mov is the best.

697663 and the.mov series is probably why pinkie had a man voice.

[Aurum]

At first I thought you were gonna put wet dreams in your description.

[Reed Libro]

697686 nice username and profile picture ( hides in panic room )

[The Dude]

697891 Your lack of .MOV disturbs me.

[psycho pony guy]

poor Hannibal, that rude comment was uncalled for

[StayOuttaMyShed]

697741 i1267.photobucket.com/albums/jj551/you400/124591_-_artist_Max_Gilardi_fluttershy_mov_SHED.png
I don't see how it could possibly make you feel unsettled. Just look at that adorable face.

[Dumbgamer99]

I thoroughly enjoyed this story, and I don't know why.

5/5 stars. Would read again.

[[REDACTED]]

THIS. YES. MOAR OF IT.

[ArmyOfOne1112]

697741 I've seen some totally effed up schist on the Internet. .MOV is nowhere close to the top of my Lose Faith in Humanity list.

[ArmyOfOne1112]

697988 Oh look, it is another profile pic that is worthy of mentioning, as long as we're on the topic.

[Frost Wing]

I don't know if i should read cause I might die...

[The Dude]

If I write more of this I think it the title would be "The Gary Busey Chronicles".

[Ponyteck]

DAFUQ?

[The Dude]

Gary Busey would make a portal to equestria powered by his nipple hairs.

[Reed Libro]

697992Dude in the dark the picks disturbing .but really stop please
i get awful stomach aches thinking about violent things
such as that .please i get all shaky .in not even kidding
Writing this on a phone (that just mine )is already hard
to deal with .
So plz .

[Reed Libro]

I mean not my phone my moms (btw 12 yrs very weak stomach)

[The Dude]

698260 You know what you need? Some cheese sandwiches. That black guys still here and hes made at least 85 sandwiches.

[two awesome ninjas]

NEEDS MOAR TOM HANKS

[The Dude]

698372 Look at the end of the first Chapter.

[Relevant Heavy Metal]

697664

I think you just got some bad weed, man. The Dude does not abide that shit man.

Also, I got nothing.

[The Dude]

698387 Well thats just, your opinion man.

[littlelf1116]

Well i liked your first one and this one was a tiny let down. still laughed though so i did enjoy it!

And i do hope that black guy goes away or leaves soon....that shit would creep me the fuck out....

[The Dude]

699823 Yeah sorry about that. The second chapter was kind of about reaching the 1000 word mark. And about the black guy, hes still here making sandwiches. I don't even have cheese or bread and yet hes still fucking making them. He might be a magical black man.

[CookieCrumb]

I can see HotDiggedyDemon making a video of this...

[two awesome ninjas]

With the power of Tom Hanks this story is about 20 million percent cooler

[Crysis Commander]

This. Is. BRILLIANT!!!!!!!

[The Dude]

713220 Because I am a vengeful god.

[PrisonedMuffin]

"Fuck Steve Harvey"

Tyler the Creator/Odd Future reference?