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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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To be honest... I just have to as why it is alternating between first person and not.
I mean, I'd get it if it were that every scene Ruby's in is first person, then when she's not in that scene it isn't, but the scenes just... alternate.
Why did you make this choice?
6897352 Yeah I may be switching the POV a bit too much/quickly... especially with this chapter... I should have left it in first person(Ruby) through the end...
I don't have an eloquent answer to why other then to say that the POV shifts are taking over SF/He of Harmony's role as dramatic revelation delay: the character.
6897464
You can reveal as much or as little information as you want in any POV. You can write a third-person POV while only showing what that character would see/you want to reveal. Or, if you are going to include Ruby in every scene, it might be simpler to stick with first-person unless she's not there.
Switching back and forth isn't needed to preserve information distance... I mean, I'd "get" if you say it feels right to switch, and you think it has a positive effect on the reader but...
In the end, that's what this is about. What effect do you expect it to have. Right now it is a little weird. Might even explain the weird U/D ratio, since swapping willy nilly (especially if you tell one scene from Ruby's POV, and have her in the next scene but it's suddenly not from her POV) is confusing.
6897479 No, Ruby is not going to be in every scene... I don't think POV shifts are bad as long as they are done right... for example not done too often... and done in a logical manner... I'm also trying to stretch a bit as a writer... *sigh* I will sleep on this.
6897479
dag it i see you edited your comment after I posted my rebuttal... It is possible that it is the cause for the U/D ratio...
6897565
I edited it, unfortunately, in the middle of the two. Before you posted your rebuttal... but after you started reading my comment.
It's a problem with my compulsive comment-editing.
Sorry about that. I have to curb it so that people I'm talking to don't either miss things or look like a crazy person.
6897583
don't need to do that your avatar says it all
Cheese